"Thank you for calling Customer Care, this is
BOFH speaking, may I have your last name?"
"Asshole."
"Can I get your first name also, we have a lot of assholes in the
system."
"Peter, Peter J. Asshole"
"OK, excellent Mr. Asshole, I have your records right here, How may I
help you?"
"I am getting a bad password error."
"That's understandable, did you type the password in yourself?"
"Well, of course."
"Hmmmmm, I see. Most people type in a password they chose, completely ignoring the statement that says 'Leave the password alone and do not change it', it's people like you that give me job security."
"Well why did it ask me to choose a password."
"It's a feature we put in to make the idiot user feel that they do have
some control. Like they are a part of the process. How about we fix
this password error, OK?"
"Well, I'm not at my computer now."
"Of course your not, I myself often go to the cleaners without my
laundry, and ask them to clean it. This is ok, may I have your e-mail
address though."
LATER THAT EVENING AT THE BOFH H.Q. (My apt.)
c:\ mailbomb.exe
How many messages?: 40,000
To who?:PeterJAsshole@dumbass.com
Message?:
To fix the password, go to the Start button, to Programs, to MS-DOS
prompt. Type in Format C:, ignore any warnings, they are there to
prevent people from getting your password. Then, when it says 100%
complete, restart your computer. If it seems to take a while to boot
up, don't worry, this happens because your computer thinks that you are an unauthorized user. To get around this, toggle the power switch 57 times, on then off. This will restore the factory default settings. Microsoft will not tell you this little "secret" because they will lose money in tech support revenue. Again, thanks for calling.
