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OK, I can hardly believe this, but my scale does not lie. I've lost five pounds in two days. And I'm not hungry. I'm not starving myself. I had salami and cheese for dinner last night! I had a hamburger for lunch yesterday! I mean, I'm eating *food*. If this continues, I may be Kate Moss. :-) Nah. I'd never want to be that skinny. I don't think it's that healthy, you know? But five pounds. God. I was only shooting for ten but at this rate I may go to fifteen, if it keeps up...and that will take me back to my weight from my freshman year of high school.
I wasn't going to write about this, but I can't stand it, so I have to...I'll just avoid mentioning names. I was trying to get an interview with someone re: Hamlet and *I got it*. Needless to say yesterday I was...er...screaming (internally), and grinning like a fool. Bless Patti and Diane, and Jen for believing it would happen. AND IT IS.
God.
Needless to say I'm now eating, sleeping, and breathing Shakespeare. Before I was just eating and sleeping it.
Last night (after my voice lesson and after I re-watched "Scorpion") I dragged out my fairy tales again. I know that somewhere in one of these books is a story I can adapt and update. I just have to figure out which one! It's very frustrating to only be able to dig up creativity for fan fiction. Yes, there's an appreciative audience...but, damn it, I want to write for kids. I know I will. It's just a matter of when the breakthrough occurs. Hopefully I won't be forty when it happens...that's an awful long time to wait!
On my way to work this morning, I saw two men dragging a large wardrobe out of a house. Why is this significant? Here in this forum I'll admit for possibly the first time that I still check the backs of closets. For Narnia. Silly? Maybe. Probably. But there's a part of me that will not let those feelings of wonder, of curiosity, go...and I think that's a good thing...the tiny feeling of disappointment I feel when my fingers touch the back wall really keeps me in touch with a part of myself I hope to cling to for as long as I can. It's the part of me that cries every time I watch "Little Women" (or read it, for that matter) and searches the library stacks for new authors like Robin McKinley. I think it's important that we retain something of the child within us forever, and that too often it is taken away or we set it aside.
So if you know what I'm talking about...the next time you see an unfamiliar closet, open it. Reach inside. Wish for a snowy night and a lamppost, and if you don't see them, seek them within yourself. And don't let go.
~*~Mel~*~
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