Dick: "Sex can't be casual. There's just too many reprocussions."
Tommy: "There wouldn't be if you just shut up about it."

-3rd Rock From the Sun

"Salad isn't food. Salad comes with the food."

-John Pinette

"Early to rise, and early to bed:
Makes a man healthy, but socially dead."

-Yakko, Animaniacs

"Life is putting Prozac to the test."

-Tony, The Sopranos

"Fate is like a caged gorilla: it may pelt you with dung if you mock it."

-Warriv, Diablo II

"You make me feel alive, like I dropped a stun gun down my pants."

-Don, 3rd Rock from the Sun

"Give a jackal your hand and he'll take your whole arm."

-Lara Croft, Tomb Raider: The Last Revelation

"The dictionary says a wedding is the act of pulling weeds from one's garden."

-Homer, The Simpsons

"But when push comes to shove, you gotta do what you love, even if it's not a good idea."

-Hermes, Futurama

"There is no knowledge that is not power."

-Ultimate Mortal Kombt 3

"There is no cause for alarm! But there probably will be."

-Brain, Pinky and the Brain

"You probably don't recognize me. I've been traveling, and I'm all . . . shlumpy."

-Princess Bala, Antz

Optimus: "Freedom is the right of all sentient life."
Megatron: "Then they'd better stay out of my way!"

-Beast Wars

"Today I'm handing out lollipops and ass-whuppins, and I'm all out of lollipops."

-Grace, Will & Grace

The night sky over the planet Krikkit is the least interesting sight in the entire Universe.

-Life, the Universe, and Everything by Douglas Adams

Ginger: "We'll either die free chickens, or die trying."
Babs: "Are those the only choices?"

-Chicken Run

"When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you."

-Jim Raynor, StarCraft: Brood War

"And now, a man who needs no introduction . . ." (leaves)

-Bender, Futurama

"Money doesn't always bring happiness. People with ten million dollars are no happier than people with nine million dollars."

-Hobart Brown

". . . I told the elephants to forget it, but they can't."

-Zazu, The Lion King

"Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time."

-Steven Wright

"People are like rugs, hang them out a window and shake them a little, and you'll be surprised how much dirt comes out."

-Hratli, Diablo II

"Now, open your mouth and let's have a look at that brain . . . No, nononono, not that mouth!"

-Dr. Zoidberg, Futurama

Blackarachnia: "Why do you always talk to yourself?"
Megatron: "I simply have a penchant for intelligent conversation."

-Beast Wars