....I want to read the play. I don't care if it needs work. I'm not a publisher. I'm just curious. Just, Hah! I am curious and that's the motivation behind many a great discovery. The rest seem to be accidents. There are all of these things that I want to do, that are my idea of fun, that I don't feel like doing right now.

I can't form pictures or words in my head, but I can dance [in my head].

.... It's a joyous feeling, actually feeling what I feel when I make physical movements, while staying still. I love improv dancing. We were doing that in Modern Class, listening to the music and dancing whatever we want, although Melissa (my teacher) usually imposed some sort of guidance, such as lead with your left side or use all levels. The levels are standing full up, jumping in the air, bending, crouching, on the floor, and everything in-between.

.... Every movement, every position in Ballet has a purpose. If you ask why, you always get an answer. I love that. Usually, it is to continue a line, create symmetry, highlight something or another. I love dance and I have become better at ballet after my intensive study all summer, but I still can't do pirouettes. I can't spell in French, either.

.... I would like to study choreography notations and French so that I can write down the dances I feel in my head when I have music. That's not just listen to music, mind you, I can make music in my head. It's usually stuff I've heard before, but occasionally something new pops up.

.... The music is lonely in my mind. It needs dance or song to accompany it, preferably with more than just myself involved. Nobody has to be around, cds'll do, but I love live. My cousin Samantha and I used to dance together. We'd turn on music, dim the lights, and try not to bang into each other as we flew. It 'bout broke my heart when she became too old to dance. Seeing as I'm 2 months, 12 days older than her, I don't see how that happened, but it did. We used to sing camp songs together, too. I loved singing in the Children's Choir. I love singing for the joy of it. I sing in the car to whatever music that is playing. When big, famous singers sing off rhythm to the music for dramatic effect or whatever, it messes my mind up and I don't like that.

.... Bethany was watching Sister Act 2 today, so I saw parts of it on and off as I passed through. The last song [not from the credits] is playing in my head and it's dancing. I love dancing and singing, but I can't do both at once, which is why I dance to music I can't sing to frequently.

.... The first time I saw "Cats," when I was 7 years old, I decided that, if I could somehow find a genie to give me a singing voice I liked (which would be my first wish, next coming a horse, and care for it.) (also bringing to mind, my voice sounds different to me than to everybody else, so I want to hear what some great singer's voice sounds like to themself sometime. Distortion checked my by them may do that?), I would be happy to spend my life traveling the world, performing "Cats." I would get to sing, dance, act, dress-up, and travel with my best friends (for of course the other cast members would be my best friends). If we're going for the destiny approach, then that's probably why I don't have a good singing voice. Yeah, right.

.... If people say what they mean (who knows?), then it seems to me that most people believe in destiny. They search for their place in the world and the one they are meant to be with. I don't think it's that simple.

.... There is plenty else to do besides annoy others, so why do we spend so much time doing so? I hate politeness, but I value respect. Mannerisms are just sure ways of showing respect, but I'd rather have someone trust my judgment than say 'bless you' when I sneeze, another thing I dislike. Gee, I've been blessed so much, I think I'm going to have a heart attack. Really. Truly. Uh-huh. Gosh.

.... I like the new set up of the file manager. If I ever get around to doing something, It'll be a lot more convenient. I wish spell checker would work on highlighted selections of webpages, but no, I'd have to cut and paste to e-mail. I'm not going to do that. You reading this will just have to suffer.

.... I miss the excitement of being on the road.

.... I love books about well-run schools and traveling.

.... Said of my senior picture "This isn't our Laura!" That wasn't even one of my parents, it was my littlest brother.

.... Jeff looks like a bumble bee rollerblading along all in black, dyed-black hair slicked back, yellow headphones for droopy antenni.

.... I love the cartoon movie "Robin Hood." I especially love the music.

.... My, I sound upbeat, optimistic, and perky. I'm not. I really have a horrible headache and am wincing every few seconds. I see why the ancients thought the mind wasn't in the brain. My head hurts terribly, but my mind is clear. It's jumping, actually. I'm pretty good at hiding my headaches, it appears. A little too good, maybe, in that nobody knows how often or how badly I have them. The worst ones show on my face, and I have trouble moving or talking. It's not because I can't think. I can. It's forming the words that's hard. It's easier to type because my hands are more removed from the pain than my mouth or my eyes.

.... Oh, yeah, that's where I was going. I have headaches most of the time. I refuse to become dependent on prescription medicine and regular aspirin, etc., doesn't work. Only a few make me realize why people commit suicide. Boy, this sounds a little dramatic, but it's ok.

.... Anyway, I'm not trying to give pain as an excuse. What I'm giving is absence of pain as a reason. When I don't have a headache, I'm very, very happy, almost hyper, I talk really, really fast, I burst into song, I argue forever, I'm compassionate and try harder not to hurt people's feelings, and I basically seem like a different person.

.... Well, I'm all. Timing is the chancy thing. If you were to know me to one minute only, you might not recognize me as me if you knew me a different minute, appearances aside. I feel all of it all of the time. Some things just seem more worthwhile to express at certain moments, I want to do them more. What I want changes all of the time. What I want to be is one on the simplest questions. Well, scientist, writer, doctor, lawyer, teacher, diplomat, mapmaker, composer, dancer, .... you get the idea, I hope. EVERYTHING, I want to be everything, do everything. What I want of people is one of the hardest ones. Each and everyone is so much.

.... I know people who say them have trouble with infinity. I never have. Infinity is what I know best. That and nothing. All the somethings are what give me trouble.