Guest Editor this month: Ed Jefferson

Urm, so yeah, there's this quotefile thing you see, and I sort of
accidentally asked if I could do, and this Robert guy says yeah, you
can do it. Next thing I know is, all these quotes have turned up. So I
edited them. Yeah?

They may or may not make any sense, but this is my first go. If it's
completely screwed, please send any insults and flames to
j2rider@aol.com . So, here we go:

"Of course, if you had a quote file, you could look it up in the quote
file under quote file"
 -Jason A. Miller 31st May 1995 

Welcome everyone to the latest Quote File. The Quote File is basically
all the smartest, wittiest, most entertaining stuff collected off of
rec.arts.drwho, filtered by trained hands (they're bunking off this
month, so I'm doing it) and presented back to you in a sort of
instant-nostalgia recycling exercise curiously reminiscent of the
Reader's Digest only more enlightening. Essentially, it is the
funniest quotes to appear in the newsgroup as nominated by *you*. To
that end, if you see a quote you think deserves an entry in the Quote
File, just mail Robert at 

smithrj2@mcmail.cis.mcmaster.ca 

or the handy-dandy 

radwquotefile@geocities.com

and include the attributions and the quote in full. 

Please don't be shy about nominating stuff directly to Robert via
e-mail. Saying 'quotefile!' in the newsgroup may just be a way to
express how funny you think a post is, but it's also highly likely
that, due to the sheer traffic of stuff round here, it won't find its
due receptacle. Even if you only think it's mildly funny, or if you
think that nobody else might get the joke, Robert would *much* rather
have too much to choose from than too little. 

I've tried my best to get the dates and attributions right, but a few
will probably have wandered about of their own accord, so please don't
get too upset and be sure to mail Robert with any corrections for the
web page(s). (No, really, I'm sure loads of mine are completely
screwed.)

Disclaimer: The copyright of all material contained herein remains
with the original poster. No attempt is made to supercede any
copyright and the Quote File maintains its impartiality under Fair Use
for purposes of Comment or Review. 

The quotefile is updated monthly (usually midmonth, although it varies
depending on the schedule) and past and present quotefiles can be
found at: 

http://geocities.datacellar.net/Area51/Corridor/1161/ 
On with the quotes! 

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Gillian Walker wrote...
>David Brunt wrote:
>> Lightstormer wrote...
>> >Gillian Walker wrote...
>> >>TreyL wrote:
>> >>
>> >>> Well, first off can anyone verify that this deal has in fact been
>> >>> inked??  Secondly, I find it hard to believe that The Beeb would even
>> >>> consider Selleck, or that Selleck would even be remotely interested in
>> >>> doing it.
>> >>>
>> >>> Wasn't Peter Davison on Magnum P.I. once? Anyone see that?
>> >>>
>> >>NO! Which ep? Which? I'd like to see that.
>> >
>> >Dangit I can't remember the name... Magnum went to London for some
>> > reason...
>> >I only saw it once and this was when I was a little kid...  Jeez...
>>
>> First episode of Season 6, entitled "Deja Vu" - a TVM-length episode. Aired
>> in US September 1985.  With Francesca Annis, Peter Davison, Julian Glover,
>> Marc Sinden, Paddy Navin and Pamela Salem
>>
>> Magnum and Higgins fly to England to organize Robin Masters' new home, but
>> both face personal challenges. Magnum finds an old dear friend has been
>> mysteriously killed while Higgins debates about seeing his father.
>>
>> David
>
>David, do you know everything?

Yes.

David Brunt  31/5/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[Fantasy Book Editor]

..or if Fantasy Book Editor is not canon for you, play Fantasy Mark
Stevens. All you have to do is name three things which are bound to
happen to the books that would stop you buying them(not enough
Krynoids is entered as a fourth automatically as this is a given) 

Orinoco  1/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"The Doctor"  wrote in message
news:8h5jgb$bt7$1@ns2.nl2k.ab.ca...
> Imagine in the late 1970s if Romana II was MALE instead of FEMALE.

If he were as adorable as Lalla, I might be living an entirely
different lifestyle now.

Rufus T. Firefly  1/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[I Hate You! I hate you and I wish you had cancer!]

"Ronnie Clark" wrote



Why don't you desist from posting drivel here and choose one of the
more usual routes to purge your student angst?  Like cramming into a
phone box with loads of other students; or amusing the locals of your
local pubs by engaging on a three-legged crawl of the neighbourhood,
always remembering to pay by cheque for your rounds of drinks; or
recycling Chubby Brown jokes for the rag mag; or timing your breakfast
to coincide with Neighbours; or trying to keep your carton of milk
fresh by hanging it in a plastic bag out the window; or enjoying a
balanced diet of curry pot-noodles, chicken pot-noodles and sweet and
sour pot-noodles; or rooting around your laundry
bag for the least offensive pair of used kecks because you can't be
arsed to go to the laundrette; or taking full advantage of your room's
en-suite urinal aka washbasin; or appropriating your female
housemate's tampons and dunking them in tins of chopped tomatoes; or
chain smoking three ounces of Old Holburn but insisting on using the
blue Rizlas because they're 'less carcinogenic'; or purporting to know
the difference between Moroccan and Lebanese hash; or handing your
essay in late and blaming it on 'girlfriend
problems'; or using Lynx body spray in lieu of washing ever; or trying
to get drunk on reduced-price pisswater served up in splintered
plastic glasses; or waking up to discover you've got two dead legs
because you've been sharing a single-bed in some fat slag's hall of
residence; or doing fuck-all for three years before getting an
academic qualification at the end of it.

Like I did.

Gareth Thomas  1/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"M.H. Stevens" wrote...
> Ed Jefferson wrote:
> > "M.H. Stevens" writes:
> > >Martin Wicks wrote:
> > >
> > >So McGann returns to the fold? An excellent move, now if we could just
> > >convince the other fellow the tableau would be complete!
> > >
> > >> Also in DWM this month they have the results of one of their surveys.
> > >> Interference came bottom out of all the 1999 books with 43%. The taking
> > >> of Planet Five came second to bottom with 51%. In the 'favourite
> > >> authors' poll Terrance Dicks came third, Gary Russell came eighth and
> > >> Lawrence Miles came tenth and last. I hadn't realised quite how weird
> > >> DWM readers were until I read this.
> > >>
> > >
> > >Well Well Well, so much for the precious statistics!  Looks like the
> > >tables have turned.  I love it! I love it! (And in case you didn't hear
> > >me the first two times)  I LOVE IT!!!!!!!
> >
> > And this proves what? That most people who buy a magasine that's pretty hostile
> > to the books, and doesn't provide much coverage of them, like the books that
> > are traditional? My surprise.
>
>
> Must you always rain on my parade? Hmmmm?

So what do we know? That a lot of online fans are into rad books, and
most of DWM's readers are into trad books.

Next week on RADW, we delve into the mysteries of what colour oranges
are.

Jonn Elledge  1/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[An odd Heart of TARDIS thingie...]

Scene: An ordinary urban household

[A cute fluffy dog runs down the stairs clutching a copy of Heart Of
TARDIS in it's mouth. Ed Jefferson is running after it]

ED: Oi you mangy mutt - give me back my f***ing book

[He attempts to wrest the book away from the dog, but it bites ED's
arm off]

ED: Aaaaaaaaargh

[The book falls out of the dogs mouth and falls in slow motion,
bouncing]

SNARKY: (Voice-over) See haw soft and bouncy Heart of TARDIS is. With
extra padding, it all adds up to a much nicer experience. To do a
proper comparison between this and other books we took two volunteers

[Cut to image of KEITH BROOKES and CHRIS CWEJ drugged and bound]

SNARKY: We gave Keith a copy of Divided Loyalties, and Chris a copy of
HoT. Lets see how they fared.

[Cut to JOHN LONG, the roving reporter. He is waiting outside a
bathroom door. KEITH BROOKS comes out]

JOHN: So Keith, how did you find Divided Loyalties?

KEITH: [He is clutching a copy of DL. There are many pages ripped
out.] It was lovely and soft yet still textured enough to... [He
catches JOHN's quizzical glare] Ahhh, I get what I was supposed to do
now...

JOHN: Well, let's see how Chris Cwej faired

[He turns to CHRIS CWEJ]

JOHN: Well then???

CHRIS CWEJ: I found Heart of TARDIS absorbant... ah, I think I did the
same thing as Keith, there...

JOHN: IT'S A F***ING BOOK!!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO READ IT. Pro McCoy
trolls...

SNARKY: And there you have it. We're not sure what, but it's
something, damn
it.

Da Cat Badge  3/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Gareth Thomas wrote...
>
>It's the Teletubby on the far right.

Thatcher?

David Brunt  4/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[DWM versus online rankings]

 Jonn Elledge wrote in message <8hebn0$gof$1@pegasus.csx.cam.ac.uk>...
>This is a very bizarre thread. As I've read through the posts, it's
>alternated at random between statistical analysis, the Gary Russell
>conspiracy theory, Mad Larry's hatred of all things trad, and Mornington
>Crescent. I need a drink.
>
>So what d'you all think of absinthe?
>
It makes the heart grow fonder.

David Brider  4/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Shaft Tse Tung wrote:

> I am more tham my penis, god damn it,

Whereas I have gained full control over my host's brain.  Nozzink in
ze vurld can stop me now.

Finn Clark's penis  5/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Stuart Wallace" stuart_wallace@soapyfrogs.freeserve.co.uk wrote:

>Feeling>nostalgic the other night with 'Red Dawn' on my stereo and the new
>DWM>on my bed, my mind dredged up the memory of a Davison covered bedroom>I
>slpet in for a couple of years in the mid 80s.

>Does anyone>else remember how, upside down, the Cybermen looked>like
>gorillas?

No. Did you live in that area with the mercury spill in the mid 80's?

Alan S Wales  6/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Jonn Elledge" wrote:
> "Keith Brookes" wrote...
> >
> > Phyllis E Blum????
> >
> > You got a secret life we don't know about Jon?
> 
> Yes. Thanks to Faction Paradox, he's his own mother.

"Before I found out about FACTION PARADOX, I thought my life would be
all linear and stuff -- you know, from birth to death blah blah blah.
Luckily, though, a friend told me that FACTION PARADOX was the best
thing to never happen to him, so I decided to give it a try."

"I sent away for FACTION PARADOX and lo and behold, nothing I can
remember happened. But I must have lost those 40 years, 30 pounds and
two wives and ended up as my personal lord and saviour SOMEHOW, so ...
thanks, FACTION PARADOX!"

Yes, new and yet old FACTION PARADOX! You can't find it in stores, you
can't order it by phone! Indeed, you can't find it in the timeline at
all! It's ONLY available through this special TV offer! Send loads of
money to yourself IMMEDIATELY!

Charles Martin  6/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[The episode titles game]
 
Ed Stradling  wrote in message
news:8hgpcc$d0p$1@supernews.com...
> Okay, I play.
> 
> Which story is this?
>
> 1. The test of the Whore-da
> 2. Sit on My Face of Evil
> 3. Over the Teeth and Down the Throat
> 4. Why not get the rest of that leather off and have done with it love?

Louise Jameson in an exciting adventure with the Channel 5 schedulers.

Andrew J. Brook  6/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[if you were to join the TARDIS, which crew would you best suit?]

"john long"  wrote in message
news:393EB9CC.5A27@epix.net...
> I would travel with the third doctor and Jo, and I'd love to tag that
> snatch on the boring days.

You fancy Jon Pertwee???!?

Jonn Elledge  7/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

In article <8hbcrc$pbl$1@pegasus.csx.cam.ac.uk>,
"Jonn Elledge"  said:

> So... what is "necessary"?

I'm not sure about "necessary," but I heard somewhere that Doctor Who
is required...

William December Starr  8/6/00


-----------------------------------------------------------------

On Thu, 8 Jun 2000 17:41:42 +0100, "David Brider"
 wrote:

>poetaster@my-deja.com wrote in message <8ho5tp$s1f$1@nnrp1.deja.com>...
>>If any one's read latest DWM... Can Saward's spelling really be that
>>bad?
>
>There is something vaguely satisfying about a professional writer who can't
>spell for toffee.  (Mind you, some of the pros on here can be a bit iffy...)

It strikes me that it has the same spelling, grammar and tone as those
notes Jack the Ripper left. 

So that's another mystery solved.

Lance

Lance Parkin  9/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------
[Would you actually join the TARDIS?]

Chris Cwej wrote that travelling with the Doctor would let him:

> Get away from everything, see the universe, meat new people

The Doctor doesn't have those kind of adventures, you know.  Certainly
not on children's TV, anyway.  :-)

Finn Clark.  9/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[Would you actually join the TARDIS?]

In article <8hon7c$h6s$1@neptunium.btinternet.com>,
"Alan McWhan"  wrote:

> Paul Andinach  wrote in message
> news:Pine.LNX.4.21.0006081653540.25808-100000@mermaid.ucc.gu.uwa.edu.au...
>
> > The situation:
> >
> > You're walking along, minding your own business, when you see the
> > TARDIS parked on the sidewalk. The Doctor offers you a position in
> > the TARDIS crew. He's in a hurry, so there's no time to pack,
> > fetch stuff from home, or even leave a message to tell people
> > where you've disappeared to. If you haven't decided in five
> > minutes, he'll leave without you.
> >
> > Do you go?
>
> Fuck, yes! *I* live in Glasgow...

So you'd rather face scarred & psychotic maniacs, be accosted by
oozing creatures gibbering insanely, get caught between two warring
factions intent on utterly destroying each other...

No hang on, sorry, that *is* Glasgow.

Donald Campbell ] 10/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Andrew Curry  wrote in message
news:8i0gm2$69p$1@neptunium.btinternet.com...
> Why did Eric Saward and John Nathan-Turner fall out during season 23
> resulting in Eric walking off?
>
Eric refused to wear shorts around the office.

Daniel Cooper  11/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"David Brunt"  wrote in message
news:8i6gpm$c60$1@plutonium.btinternet.com...
> Sarah Hadley wrote in message
> >>
> >>I guess this puts paid to my theory that, if Strutton had written more
> >>episodes, the Doctor's wing would have become as overused as the sonic
> >>screwdriver...
> >
> >I'm sorry, I just had a horrible vision of those twins, Romulus and Remus,
> >trying to say "the Doctor's blue ring": "the Docteh's bwue wing". ;-)
> >
> >I see what you mean about the ring, though. It does seem like a sort of
> >improvised sonic screwdriver. David, maybe you could help here...
> >did Dennis Spooner suggest that one?
>
> No, that appears to be pure Strutton, though it may have evolved with
> discussions with Spooner during scripting.  Though it's interesting that
> the ring next makes a major influence on a plot in one of Spooner's
> episodes of "The Dalek Master Plan".
>
> >>It's interesting to see how much Strutton masculinised the story in
> >>the translation to novel - I wonder if this was a restoration of his
> >>original ideas of how it should be?
> >
> >My guess is he just wrote for generic characters without definite gender
> >(I do it too), and their sex just changed according to who played them.
>
> That's pretty much it - 'Cowardly Menoptra', 'Bolshie Menoptra','Old
> Menoptra', 'Menoptra with Ian' - not much real definition and the
> performances define the roles more than the script.
>

All the above are future Harlequin minatures releases. Unless DAPOL
get there first...

Gordon Dempster  14/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

On the function of Coldheart as the defining trad novel in the EDAs. 

I'd like to begin this lecture by welcoming you all to the trad
authors annual convention. If you'll check your schedules, you'll see
that activities this week include a Chris Bulis workshop, where we'll
see how  the cut-and-paste function can be used to great effect in
your novel-writing career. This workshop will, naturally, be done
online and we regret that Mr Bulis is unlikely to appear in person. 

A highlight, I'm sure, will be the Terrance Dicks memorial banquet on
Friday, where we'll present the prizes for the least original
description of the sound the TARDIS makes when it materialises, the
Peter Grimwade award for the most gratuitous use of UNIT continuity in
a fifth Doctor story -- don't look so worried, Mike Morris, we all
know you've won it -- and the John Peel award for the book that best
characterises the eighth Doctor as one of his predecessors (please
note that extra time has been scheduled for this award due to the
large number of nominees). 

Today's lecture, however, will be a seminal analysis of what makes a
novel trad. Now, this may seem a little pointless to some of you --
sit down back there, Robert Perry, there'll be time for questions at
the end -- since you wouldn't have been invited here if you weren't
all illustrious members of the trad author society. However, it has
come to our attention that some have claimed that there's no easily
discernible "trad agenda". I intend to demonstrate that at last we
have the defining trad book on our hands.

Whichever one of you is Trevor Baxendale should be congratulated for
your sterling efforts towards trad awareness in the EDAs. I'm aware
that this is hardly an area that needs it, and Ms Buffini, who will be
presenting tomorrow's symposium, has already secured the lifetime
award in this category, but of late there has been some talk that the
EDAs have become too rad.

/pause for laughter to subside

Yes, yes, an oldie, but a goodie, I'm sure you'll agree. And there's
nothing wrong with that, nothing at all -- oh, thank you, Peter,
that's very witty, I'll have to use that one next time I'm about to
visit the lavatory. 

Anyway, returning to the latest Baxendale opus, we have here
Coldheart, an excellent example of exactly the sort of thing we should
all be striving towards. If you'll follow along the flow chart I've
outlined on this transparency, I'll demonstrate just how we can all
make our books tradder than ever by following the Baxendale lead. 

Let's look at the setting. A harsh, almost impossible climate, meaning
our civilisation of three stock characters -- I'll return to that in a
moment -- and thousands of nameless extras can struggle gamely to eke
out a meagre existence. A good one this. Fire and Ice. It's simple,
it's effective, it could be filmed at any of several quarries within
30km of the BBC Television Centre. We have a winner.

Story elements are perhaps the most important element of any novel and
it's important to give the punters something they'll enjoy. An entire
civilisation living in a studio set? They'll lap it up. A group that's
been outcast because of some hideous deformity, despite the fact that
many of their numbers are good at heart and are only led by a reckless
trouble-maker, who himself is not really evil? Bring it on. A huge,
monstrous entity lurking under the ground, adversely affecting the
entire civilisation above it? This stuff is gold, people, it's gold.

Characters? They're easy. Political leaders, of course. Best to make
one of them power-hungry and ruthless (with a great secret that will
prove to be his undoing, naturally) and the others can be doddering
old men of inaction. We'll need sympathetic outcasts, naturally. Just
the one should suffice. The uglier the better and Trevor's come up
with another winner here. Slimers. It doesn't get any better than
this.

And don't forget, we'll need this society to appear quite benign on
the surface, but to hide a shocking secret. And a mine! Don't forget
mines. You can never go wrong with mines, that's what Terry Nation
told me.

/pause for a moment of respectful silence

Ah, but I hear you say -- yes, you, Gatiss, I heard that -- what about
the regulars. You might disagree, but we're living in the golden age
of trad. When I was a lad, you couldn't move for NAs and their seventh
Doctor and their personifications of death and their angst and their
moral ambiguities and their complexities of characterisation. Many of
us were rudely confined to the MAs. But now we're everywhere. We're
lucky; we've got the eighth Doctor now. Depth? Complexity? Reader
interest? Even the rad authors can't seem to manage any of that with
him. I'm telling you, we're living the dream.

Now the companions are more of a problem. We suffered a significant
blow when we lost the use of Sam Jones at the hands of Lawrence Miles 

/pause for general hissing and booing

Fitz is a problem, and in my previous paper I described just how
insidious this companion is. He's got depth, he's almost writer-proof
and he's got a slow and careful character arc through these books that
makes him disturbingly effective whenever anyone actually uses him.

/pause

Yes, well, we're pretty safe there, for the most part. But I'd like to
mention, as I point out in my paper, just how clever Baxendale has
been. He's taken this character arc and reduced it to its simplest and
most inane reduction and reproduced precisely that and nothing else.
Yes, Fitz is becoming a bit like the Doctor! It's brilliant and it
quietly undoes the modicum of work done in previous novels featuring
Fitz. So well done, yet again, Trev.

Sadly, Coldheart fails to be the definitive trad novel only because of
its scheduling position. Yes, this book uses Compassion and frankly
she's far too interesting for the EDAs. However, Trevor struggles
bravely with this, and successfully reduces the complex and morally
uncertain character developed in the previous two books to a much more
simplified one, who falls off cliffs and ponders the death of
humanoid like a Dave McIntee character, who's having a particularly
shallow day. It's not wholly successful, I'll grant you, but it's a
valiant attempt.

In summary, let me reiterate that Coldheart almost single-handedly
defines the trad agenda. It's quite logical when you think about it,
really. They're Doctor Who fans. They like reading about it, they like
watching it. So we should all be trying to do exactly what Coldheart
achieves so effortlessly: take well-established elements from the
series, shuffle carefully (but not too carefully) and then deal out a
brand new novel, with 40% new material. 

Are there any questions? Ah, Mr Tucker, yes it actually does have the
words "this is another in the series of original adventures for the
Eighth Doctor" on the back cover. We're putting together a team of
very experienced lawyers for the defence, yes. Yes, that's right,
they'll be the same ones who handled the War of the Daleks case and
who got Steve Cole off after Short Trips, so we don't expect any
problems in that area.

Anyone else? Yes, Natalie? Ah, no, he takes a different approach to
yours and I argue that it's a more effective one, despite your, erm...
earnest... attempt. You see, the real brilliance of Coldheart is that,
on the whole, it's actually a fairly enjoyable novel. Relentlessly
dedicated to the cause, of course, but it takes its elements and
delivers something that's fairly readable and broadly enjoyable. 

I'd like to thank you all for attending this talk. There will be a
short recess, after which we'll be hearing an exciting talk, in which
one of our number details his efforts at successfully infiltrating the
DWM survey and establishing himself as the returning officer.

Robert Smith?  15/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[How Tall is Colin Baker?]

The Doctor  wrote in message
news:8iita4$4p6$1@ns2.nl2k.ab.ca...
>
> Did Colin grow since 1993?

No. You're shrinking.

> Peter Davison is a giant.

Really? Does he live at the top of a beanstalk and eat children?

Gavin Winters  18/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"orinoco" wrote:

>In todays Telegraph Letters;
>
>Cheap Return;
>Sir - Richard Millet t can come out from behind the sofa (letter, June 16).
>BBC Worldwide, the commercial arm of the BBC, is in talks with an American
>production house, but it is early days and no agreement has been reached. No
>budgets have been set and, because it is a Worldwide project, no licence
>fee-payers' money would be involved in bringing back Doctor Who
>Mary Collins, BBC Worldwide
>

early days = they phoned them this morning

no agreement has been reached = they've gone for a pint

no budget has been set = beer prices are up again

a Worldwide project = *major* pub crawl

no licence fee-payers money = everyone buys own drinks

bringing back Doctor Who = a popular BBC joke

>If this is true, I would say it is a case of sooner rather than later that
>we will see the return of 'the good Doctor TM'
>
a case of sooner rather than later = Orinocos favourite tipple has
just gone up, so he's economising ;-)

Gallifreyan  19/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[Man Should Not Meddle With Things He Does Not Understand]

"Charles Martin"  wrote in message
news:PRi35.19318$74.70903@typhoon.tampabay.rr.com...
> In article <8ij89s$i52$2@news6.svr.pol.co.uk>, "Gordon Dempster"
>  wrote:
>
> > This is the story you might never have lived to read - thanks to the
> > scientists who last week conducted an experiment that could have
> > blown up the world.
>
> They are REALLY taking this breaking up Microsoft thing SERIOUSLY, aren't
> they?
>
> > Physicists in America took an extraordinary gamble by recreating, on a
> > minature scale, the Big Bang that gave birth to the universe.
> >
> > [Bloody Americans. Claiming credit for retrieving the Enigma Machine,
> > starting wars to get people's minds off the President's affairs, blow up
> > planet without asking for permission beforehand]
>
> They DID have permission! Here's their signed waiver from the Hyperspatial
> Bypass Committee on Alpha Centauri right here!
>
> > The
> > reward was to duplicate, for the first time, the awesome flash of
> > creation that announced the beginning of time.
>
> So has time started over? Do I have to set my clocks back? Will Jonn have
> to do his exams again?
>
> > But the delight of scientists was mixed with relief - for, in theory, the
> > experiment could have triggered a chain reaction that would have
> > destroyed the Earth.
>
> And this is the theory they were hoping to PROVE???
>
> > 'There was a degree of risk, but we thought it worth taking,' US
> > government research scientist Dr. Barbara Long said yesterday. 'We
> > have made a huge scientific advance.
>
> who cares HOW much you got paid for the book rights -- it's our PLANET
> you're talking about destroying, woman!
>
> >"We have actually glimpsed the
> > moment of creation.'
>
> Next time, just rent a porno movie, will ya?
>
> > Because it had never been done before, and no one really knew what
> > would happen, the US government employed a team of top scientists
> > to assess how dangerous the experiment really was.
> >
> > [Consisting of Brannon Braga, Dexter from Dexter's Lab, Professor
> > Pat Pending from Wacky Races and Dr. Ruth.]
>
> Actually it was just Mandark and Dexter. While they were arguing over
> whether or not it would work, Dee Dee pushed the button anyway.
>
> > The gold particles inside the Relativistic Heavy Ion Collider (RHIC,
> > pronounced Rick) at the Brookhaven Laboratory would fragment into
> > particles called quarks and gluons.
>
> Gluons? Don't I have some Gluon fingernails around here somewhere??
>
> > For the first time since the creation
> > of the universe more than ten billion years ago, these particles would
> > mix freely.
>
> Man, apartheid SUCKED, didn't it?
>
> > And as the mixture cooled, the scientists predicted, nuclear
> > reactions would produce phenomena called 'strangelets'.
>
> The scientist in charge could be affectionately known as "Dr. Strangelet"
>
> > These are the worst of all possible monsters.
>
> HA! These scientists CLEARLY never came up against the Fish People!
>
> > believed to exist
> > deep inside the universe, growing at a fantastic speed by absorbing all
> > the matter round them - which could include the Earth. 'If such an
> > object was produced at RHIC, it would indeed be extremely
> > dangerous,' says the official report.
>
> One WAS created. Calls itself Microsoft.
>
> > Scientists concluded that although there was a good chance of a
> > 'strangelet'  being produced
>
> And just two paragraphs earlier they had decided the chance was "so small
> as to be worth the risk!"
>
> > it would almost certainly exist for no more
> > than a millionth of a second - not enough time for it to start growing.
> > And that is what seems to have happened, although analysis will only
> > be completed later this year.
>
> So the universe WAS destroyed ... briefly.
>
> > [So let me get this straight. They won't know until later in the year if
> > one of these things was produced. By then it'll have ravaged Long
> > Island, Hoboken, maybe if we're lucky, Dundee. Unless it travelled
> > back in time and destroyed several important parts of the BBC
> > archives...along with some episodes of The Underwater Menace.]
>
> Wow ... you know that would explain SO MUCH ...
>
> > 'We all breathed a little easier when it was over,' said Dr. Long.
>
> "Doctor?"
>
> "Yeth?"
>
> "When I do this it creates a chain reaction that could conceivably destroy
> the universe."
>
> "Well don't do that then!"

ROTLMAO!!! I hadn't accounted for the chaotic presence of DeeDee
in this situation. Next week - US Scientists decide to stick nuclear
waste on the moon and blow it up, just to see if Space:1999 was being
scientifically accurate.

Gordon Dempster  19/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

"Misha Lauenstein" wrote...
> "Gareth G. Jelley Esq." wrote:
> > Misha Lauenstein wrote...
> > >
> > > After The Eight Doctors, I should hope.
> >
> > Unless they decided, for the greater good, to retcon t8D... :)
>
> "Have they the right?"

To destroy "The Eight Doctors"? You can't doubt it! We're talking
about "The Eight Doctors" here, the most evil fanwank ever created!
You must destroy it, you must complete your mission for the fan lords!

Jonn Elledge  19/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

  Glyn wrote:
> On Tue, 20 Jun 2000, Dan Garrett wrote:
>
> > Did the Doctor really intend to go cavorting around the universe
> > with just the TARDIS console as transport if his experiments at the
> > Power Station had been successful?
>
> I suspect that the first place he'd have gone would have been back to
> the lab with his police box in it.  Although why he didn't try doing
> this when he'd got a lift back to the lab, before the next series, I
> have no idea.

Don't forget that Mind Robber was only a few stories ago, and the
Doctor missed out on all the fun Jamie and Zoe had clinging to the
console as it tumbled playfully through the void.  I expect he wanted
to have a go on it himself.

Orange Anubis  21/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[Revelation,Resurrection,City of Death, Shada...]

"R.J. Smith" wrote:

> Benjamin F. Elliott wrote:

> >Possible way to turn it into a Target appropriate story - shift everything
> >into past tense via a framing story, either a human funeral service or a
> >Dalek funeral service. As the ceremony goes on, surviving characters
> >remember parts of the story.
>
> >Come to think of it, a Dalek that survived the slaughter and movellan virus
> >outbreak would have seen more of the action than any of the humans or the
> >Doctor, so that might be the best perspective to take.
>
> Resurrection of the Daleks
> by Eric Saward
> (Target, 144 pgs $3,95)
>
> Chapter 1.
>
> IT WAS A DARK AND STOR-MY NIGHT ON THE SPACE STA-TION. OUR MISS-ION WAS TO
> IN-FIL-TRATE, CAP-TURE DAV-ROS, MAKE HIM WORK ON THE MOV-ELL-AN VIRUS,
> DU-PLIC-ATE SOME HU-MANS, CAP-TURE THE DOC-TOR, LOCK HIM IN A ROOM NEXT TO
> DAV-ROS, MAKE A SEC-OND VIR-US, STORE THE MO-VELL-AN VI-RUS ON EARTH SO IT
> WAS READ-IL-Y AVAIL-ABLE TO THE HU-MANS TO USE A-GAINST US, FORM A
> GA-LAX-Y SPAN-NING PLAN TO AT-TACK GALL-I-FREY AND BE-COME THE NEW LORDS
> OF TIME, ALL AT ONCE...

       .....LIT-TLE DID WE RE-A-LISE AT THE TIME THAT OUR TASK WAS
MORE CON-VOL-U-TED.  THE TIDES OF HIS-TOR-Y WOULD TURN DA-LEK BRO-THER
A-GAINST BRO-THER IN A SCHEME THAT WOULD MAKE AN O-SIR-I-AN DIZ-ZY.
DIZ-ZY O-SIR-I-AN! DIZ-ZY!  DIZ-ZY O-SIR-I-AN!  DIZ-ZY!

THOSE OF US WHO WERE JUST FOLL-OW-ING OR-DERS DID NOT KNOW THAT THERE
WAS NO MOV-ELL-AN VIRUS, OR THAT THOSE SUB-JECT-ED TO IT WERE JUST
SKILLED DA-LEK ACT-ORS.  HOW COULD WE GUESS THAT THE MOV-ELL-ANS WERE
NOT OUR EN-EM-IES AT ALL, OR THAT THE DE-VI-OUS PLAN TO IN-FIL-TRATE
GALL-IF-REY WAS NEVER IN-TEN-DED TO BE E-FFECT-ED.

MY FRIEND EU-STACE WAS CHARGED WITH EN-SUR-ING THAT DAV-ROS ESCAPE AND
CON-SOL-I-DATE HIS POS-I-TION, BREED A NEW RACE OF DA-LEKS, POSE AS A
LO-CAL AP-OTH-EC-ARY, ANT-AG-ON-IZE LO-CAL POW-ERS AND EM-PLOY A DJ
FOR DEAD HUMANS. ILL-FA-TED EU-STACE WOULD LA-TER BE EX-TERM-IN-AT-ED
BY HIS COUS-IN BILLY-BOB, ON A SU-I-CIDE MISS-ION FROM THE SU-PREME
DA-LEK.  BUT EV-EN BILLY-BOB COULD NOT KNOW THAT HIS MISS-ION WAS
SIMPLY TO LULL DAV-ROS INTO A FALSE SENSE OF SEC-UR-I-TY SO THAT HE
WOULD ATT-EMPT TO RE-COV-ER AN AN-CIENT AND POW-ER-FUL ART-I-FACT.
THAT ATT-EMPT, AID-ED AND A-BETT-ED BY DA-LEKS POS-ING AS TWO
OP-POS-ING FAC-TIONS, WOULD TRICK DAV-ROS AND THE KA FAR-AQ GAT-RI
INTO DES-TROY-ING SKAR-O, EX-CEPT THAT IT REALLY WAS-N'T.  ONLY THEN,
AFTER AL-LOW-ING DAV-ROS TO DRIFT AIM-LESS-LY FOR LONG AGES, WOULD THE
REAL PLAN BE-GIN.

SO NOW, I WILL TELL YOU A STOR-Y.  IF YOU ARE WISE, YOU WILL NOT
BE-LIEVE ALL YOU ARE TOLD.  TRUST NO-ONE.  THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE, AND
IT'S LOOK-ING FOR YOU.  TAKE THE RED PILL, TO A PLACE DOWN THE RAB-BIT
HOLE WHERE THERE ARE NO SPOONS.

BUT TO BE-GIN: IT ALL START-ED ON A DARK, DANK SPACE STAT-ION.....

Daniel Gooley  27/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Hte Trasme wrote...
>
> What is your favourite encarnation of Henry Vizi. Each Person may vote only
> once, any may only vote for one of the choices below:
>
> 1. The early Azaxyr
> 2. The late Azaxyr
> 3. Exorse
> 4. M
> 5. Dr. X
> 6. "CharlesMartin6"
> 7. "Snarky"
>

Well, The first Axayr wore thin with me, he was too doddering and
incoherent.

The 'Chaplinesque' late Azaxyr tired me with his overly quaint
language and seeming incompetence in the line of flaming.

Exorse was too much of an arrogant gadabout, poncing about in his
yellow newsreadster and using unconvincing pseudoscientific
gobbledegook to explain how he couldn't be the real Azaxyr.

Dr X was rather bland, a persona which didn't carry the gravity
necessary to hold up the legend behind the name.  He was certainly one
of the better Azaxyr shams, but after M's bravura performance, many
felt shortchanged by Dr X.

CharlesMartin6's time, cruelly cut short by a legal battle during
which Azaxyr was meant to reconsider his priorities (Which is more
important, lamerdom or a clean legal record?), was saddled by some
terrible production problems -- though he himself certainly rang true
as Azaxyr, no-one really felt like it was Charles Martin delivering
those flames.

"Snarky" has, so far, been stricken by similar problems, in that his
messages do not continually ask me to install Pan-European language
support for Outlook Express, like the real Snarky's do, and thus he
just doesn't seem -right- for the role.  Furthermore, many have put
forth that "Snarky" doesn't have the necessary shamming skills to
carry on the line of the Azaxyrs, and that his entire reign has been
the weakest of the Flame Nerd's career.  While I don't share these
views, I can see where they're coming from.

I would have to say my favourite Azaxyr was 'M', the eccentric,
'Bohemian' Azaxyr.  Although many have said otherwise, no-one can
truly claim to understand what he was going on about at the time, and
I find that endearing, in a way.

James  28/6/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

>On 05 Jul 2000 02:19:40 GMT, j2rider@aol.com (J2rider) wrote:
>
>>It's all a bit of a mess really. Why not try a fandom that's uncluttered?
>
Go for it.

Nyctolops nyctolop@concentric.net 5/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

J2rider wrote:

> TO answer the original question, you need to read I WHO,
> the book that makes sense out of all the silly, dull BBC
> novels since INFINITY DOCTORS messed most of them
> up by having imitators such as INTEFERENCE, BLUE
> ANGEL, DIVIDED LOYALITIES (oh gosh how can
> someone go wrong with Doc5, Nyssa, Adric, and
> Tegan AND THE toymaker?) and SHADOWS OF AVALON.

A word of warning to those using the normally infallible J2rider Guide
To Good Reading.  In the above paragraph J2rider slags off Divided
Loyalties, but despite this it's still a bad book.  We thank you for
your attention.

Finn Clark  5/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[ Things they'd never say on RADW...]

I just want to say, before I do this... I love you all. Really!

===============================================

"God, this book isn't half as good as some of the TV stories!" (Ed
Jefferson)

"Kill the Queen! Off with her head! Off with her head!" (Yads)

"Ohh.... Piss off Yads!" (Alex LaHurreau)

"Ben Aaronovitch? Awful writer in my opinion... Oops, I didn't
belittle you just then, did I? If you think so, I'll apologise." (Jon
Blum)

"Y'know, I think what you just said has made me change my mind"
(WDStarr)

"I just saw the best episode EVER, you gotta see it. It's called 'Time
and the Rani', it rocks!" (Steve Day)

"Mel Bush and a crate of whipped cream - yum, yum, yum!" (Adam
Richards)

"Mel Bush and a crate of whipped cream? Yuk!!" (Alden Bates)

"Hmmm, another conversation about how rubbish McCoy is. I think I'll
pass on that." (DBurns6554)

"McCoy me til I cum, baby!!" (Fett)

"I think I ought to change the title of these Stripping Down threads,
it's a bit of a double entendre isn't it?" (Chris Cwej)

"Ha ha! I don't care if you could be right, I just plain don't like
you and I never did! You're subhuman garbage and frankly deserve to be
chained up and raped every two seconds by a hydraulic jack-hammer
while the word 'BASTARD! BASTARD! BASTARD!' is hollered at you
non-stop until you die!" (Karen Nyctolops)

"Suck this, Mother FUCKER!"   >BANG!<  (Orinoco) 

"I'd rather count Lungbarrow as canon than anything with that Paul
McGann person in it, frankly". (Ray C. Tate)

"It's just that, well, the Virgin novels are so much BETTER than the
TV series." (MH.Stevens)

"Just got the latest DWM. Isn't it brilliant?" (Andrew O'Day)

"Shit, they axed the Pertwee repeats! Who do we disembowel?" (Marcus
Durham)

"Go ahead, say what you like to Jon Blum, I don't care!" (Daniel
Gooley) 

"How dare you say that about my favourite story!  That
story is like, the bestest, greatest, goodest, bestest story ever in
the whole world ever, and you have no right to hurt my feelings...
whoops! ...to slag it off like that. Yeah! You mean pig!" (Ed
Stradling)

"You've got Fury From The Deep? So what? They're only old black &
white film prints, nobody wants them!" (Steve Roberts)

"You see, they were only 16mm black & white telerecordings produced
for overseas sale at the time. The telerecordings in the archives now
are held in...........  ........Fuck this - anyone fancy a
pint?" (Richard Molesworth)

"Dave, I love you too much to have another argument." (Paul Cornell)

"Paul, let's be friends!" (Dave McIntee)

"You don't know what THE FUCK you're talking about, Heart of TARDIS is
a FUCKING brilliant book and all critics of it, especially YOU are
MEAN BASTARDS!!! You're all DEAD MEAT!! Right, where's my rifle? I'm
going into DWM to sort this shit out, PERMANENTLY!" (Dave Stone)

"Is THAT what he thought of my book? Hmmm... Ahh well, doesn't bother
me; I've always thoroughly enjoyed his work and think he has every
right to his opinions." (Lawrence Miles)

"I don't want to talk about the books anymore, I'm bored with them!"
(Lance Parkin)

"So I might get a few details wrong; who cares? It's only a sequel to
The Time Monster, jeez!" (Craig Hinton)

"Ummm, you're misinformed about that, but it doesn't mean you're lying
or anything; I forgive you." (Keith Topping)

"Hmmmm, looks like a flamewar - I'd best not get involved, they can
sort it out themselves..."  (Jonn Elledge)

"McCoy SUCKS; it's a fact. Come on, DISPROVE it. Have a go if ya think
yer hard enough." (Dave Roy)

"The Pertwee era was actually the height of the series, you know. It's
true, really." (Luke Curtis) 

"The Pertwee era sucked, I thought. You liked it? OK that's cool..."
(Azaxyr) 

"Snarky, that positive McCoy defence you wrote gave me an erection for
you. I desperately want to get gay with you and exchange fluids
immediately!" (john long)

"Sex with men? Urrgh! Put it away John, you're disgusting!" (Snarky)

"What a tosspot that Adric was..." (J2Rider)

"The incredibly rough, spiky, sexless, stinking-of-piss and altogether
unleasant warthog of a man/woman [insert name here] made us all vomit
copiously when he/she wrote:" (John Pettigrew) 

"What's a blow job?" (Finn Clark)

"Nah, I haven't got a girlfriend. Never done it actually." (Keith
Brookes)

"I don't think this website lark is for me, actually" (Arpit) 

Adam Richards  5/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[ Things they'd never say on RADW...]



Like Adam said, I love all you guys really... :)


"Look, I am absolutely *sick* of all the net cluelessness that is
practiced on this newsgroup.  Could people *please* follow my example
and start snipping unecessary text from their replies?  Thank you."
(YADS)

"The DWM comic strips are utter, utter shite, and there's no way in
*hell* you'll ever convince me to make them part of *my* personal
canon.  Screw Steve Parkhouse *and* the horse he rode in on!" (FINN
CLARK)

"Could people stop referring to blowjobs and jism, I find it a
thoroughly disgusting topic of conversation, quite frankly.  I'd much
rather talk about breasts.  Wobbly wobbly..." (ADAM RICHARDS)

"Okay everybody - this is *exactly* where 'The Infinity Doctors' fits
into continuity.  Now pay attention..." (LANCE PARKIN)

"Flexihistory?  Never heard of 'im.  What an absurd suggestion." (JON
BLUM)

"No, I'm at a total loss.  I know nothing about what happened in the
world of Who on that particular day.  So sue me." (DAVID BRUNT)

"Y'know... that Magrs guy knows what he's talking about when he's
writing Who.  Hopefully he'll get the job of commissioning editor when
Justin Richards finally hands over the reins to a worthy successor."
(WILLIAM DECEMBER STARR)

"What?!?  You ignore *every* reference to the Looms in the novels?
Are you nuts or something?  The Looms are at the very *centre*, I tell
you, of Gallifreyan society!  ...Who said 'potato' at the back?" (RAY
TATE)

"Look, I keep telling everybody - *don't* read 'The Burning' when it's
published!" (LANCE PARKIN, after explaining at length about 'The
Infinity Doctors')

"I listened to 'The Fires of Vulcan' today, and all I can say is... it
was marvelous!  Bonnie was a revelation!  Hopefully this will silence
her critics forever..." (STEVE DAY)

"You're right, my sig *is* kinda excessive, isn't it?  I think I'll
trim it down a bit..." (SNARKY)

"Thank god we didn't get some fanwanky things like - hah! - Krynoids
in that novel..." (MARK STEVENS)

"Far be it from me to act as a mediator, but there's a simple way to
resolve this argument.  Will both of you just shut the fuck up before
I claim the pair of you?!?!" (ORINOCO)

"Well, I've been following the EDAs closely for several years now and
I'd just like to say 'Well done' to everybody involved.  I have the
utmost confidence in the future of the range..." (JACK BEVEN)

 "How many more times?  *Don't* read 'The Burning' when it comes
out, thicko.  It's a complete waste of paper, I kid you not..." (LANCE
PARKIN again)

"I'm sick of all these 'rad' novels.  Why can't we get back to some
good old-fashioned 'Earth-invaded-by-martians' storylines?" (JONN
ELLEDGE)

"Actually, I am *that* Gareth Thomas." (GARETH THOMAS)

"Yes, I know some people on RADW go for the '400 line post' approach,
but I like to think I can sum up my thoughts on the direction of the
EDAs in a couple of lines." (IMRAN INAYAT)

"I never really saw the point of starting 'An Unearthly Child' with
that rather ridiculous looking police constable.  A blatant attempt to
pad out an underunning episode if ever I saw one..." (ED JEFFERSON)

"I was always fond of the colour 'red' for some reason..." (TERRANCE
DICKS on his lunchbreak)

"I never liked the fact that after 'Genesis' the Daleks were
somehow... weakened and that Skaro was destroyed in 'Remembrance'.  
So I've decided to write a new novel which will see the Daleks return
to their former glory, their star-spanning Empire feared throughout
the cosmos.  Some authors would probably do a silly thing like, say,
retcon the destruction of Skaro, but I'm doing the clever thing by
setting my novel, 'War' at a point in time *before* Skaro's
destruction.  I know this may seem like a revolutionary kind of idea,
but Who's about *time* *travel*, y'know?" (JOHN PEEL, just popping in)

Meddling Mick  6/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Ben Varkentine wrote:
>Ray C Tate wrote:
> >Let's start looking at the Doctor as person and not just as a series of
> >origins, or some kind of cinchpin of the Faction Paradox.
> >
> > Clap.  Clap.  Clap Clap.
>
See, many people make this kind of assumption about Ray's half-human
Doctor, but really he just had a couple of chaste kisses.  All this
talk of social
diseases is a bit exaggerated, IMO.

Daniel Gooley  6/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Jonn Elledge:
>That's funny, because my girlfriend says >she finds references to Doctor Who
>during sex distasteful. For some reason.
>
>She wouldn't wear the Kroton outfit. :-(

Hmmm...hate to break it to you, but she might not be "the one."

Fett  7/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

> Graeme Burk  wrote:
>
> > While I agree the full-blown MS we saw Hartnell
> > contend with in The Three Doctors didn't come on
> > until much later, he was, from all reports, not
> > in very good physical condition even back in '66.
> > And we're not just talking about MS-- from all
> > reports his cantankerousness and inability to
> > remember lines could have been related to a
> > number of aging-related conditions.
>
MS?  Don'tcha mean arteriosclerosis, brought on by many, many years of
heavy-duty boozing?

Speaking of which, there's a charming story on pp.153-4 of Jessica
Carney's
_Who's There? The Life and Career of William Hartnell_:

    One evening Terry was driving Bill home to Mayfield
    from a pub in the Blackboys, rather the worse for
    wear, when he spied a road block ahead and began to
    slow down.  Bill asked, 'Why are you slowing up?'
    'The Police', said Terry.  '**** the police', said
    Bill.  They were duly flagged down, Bill insisting,
    'Leave this to me.'  Dressed in well-tailored
    trousers and shirt, he swept out of the car as if
    he was wearing his Doctor Who cloak and wig,
    shouting, 'Don't you know who I am?  I'm Doctor
    Who, Doctor BLOODY WHO!  Now get all this rubbish
    out of the way, my friend.  I need to get home and
    we are very busy people!'  No doubt now they would
    both be arrested, but somehow they managed to get
    away with it then--either the police were so
    bemused by this crazed actor behaving as if he were
    in full costume that they just laughed, or they
    were looking for stolen cars rather than lunatic
    drunken drivers.

Clearly, this incident served as the inspiration for N.W.A.'s 1989 rap
anthem, "Fuck Tha Police," thereby offering yet another example of
_Doctor Who_'s continued relevance to the pressing social, cultural,
and political issues of the day.

(I wonder if Tom Baker ever tried that stunt with the police?)

Paul Curtis  11/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[Coldheart]

Dr X wrote (no, really! he did!):

> A "coldheart" is what I have received from the
> joint my years since my girlfrend dumped me!
> now, I use that chilling reality to become your
> servant! Ask, and you shall receive!
If anyone can offer a sane explanation of the quoted paragraph, I'll
owe you a drink. Is X confessing to gay sex in jail?  What "chilling
reality"?  Note the bizarre way in which X subverts his usual
megalomaniac pretensions and becomes almost disturbingly submissive.
It's fascinating in its own demented way, almost becoming poetry in
its complete repudiation of coherence. I could study it for hours and
never get nearer to what was going through the brain of its author.
Admittedly radw has a resident specialist in that kind of
semi-sentient surrealism - the good Dave Yadallee - but I'd like to
humbly put forward Dr X as a promising newcomer.  At the moment he is
merely a student, but should Yads retire then it's good to know we
have another loony of great potential waiting to step into the breach.

> I got some news for you people that you may
> not have known. I am a real doctor! It's true!
> I received my doctorate in the Studies of Decent

The green pills, X.

> Televison from the School of Cool! Strangely
> enough, there was NOTHING in my studies
> about the McCoy era, except for the class

Heh.  Hahaha!

> entitled "Crap 101: Urkel, Full House, and the
> McCoy era of DR Who." So, youc an see that

BWAHAHAHAHAHA - gasp - AHAHAHAHA...

> I am emminently qualified as an Xpert.

EHEHEHE - wheeze - HOHOHEHEHAHAHAHAHA...  NO STOP - I can't take it
any - AHAHAHAHA - take it any more...  gasp...

Finn Clark  11/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Richard Molesworth  wrote

> > 1) The Davison Years<
>
> Never gonna happen.
>
> Ever.
>
> For legal reasons...........
>
> Even if these could be resolved, then it would still be a pretty naff
> title
Perhaps if Eric Sward died under strange circumstances (by the look of
him he couldn't outrun a Robin Reliant) then we may see this one day.
More cutting insights about how the show was crap is always welcomed.

Neil Perryman  13/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

>dpicton wrote:
> 
> I just got my copy of Verdigris and was wondering where it fit
> in relation to the rest of the stories. It features the Third
> Doctor, Jo and two others I've never heard of. Would this story
> fit in somewhere before The Green Death or else where?
> 
> I'm years behind on my reading (literally) so just want to put
> Verdigris in the line in the appropriate place.
> 

Right after Infinity Doctors?

M.H. Stevens  13/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

[2 videos I'd like the BBC to do]

>> 2) A complete bloopers tape<

Or you could just release The Time Monster as it stands. :-)

shearrob@aol.com (Shearrob) 13/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

On Fri, 14 Jul 2000 06:48:59 -0700, Merlin The Time Traveller
 wrote:

>Glitz bares a slight resemblance to JN-T, so Glitz getting off
>with Ace and Mel was probably JN-T's fantasy.
>
>Merlin The Time Traveller

An interesting theory, with only one major flaw...

Daniel Frankham  15/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Ed Jefferson  wrote in message
news:20000716070246.12460.00000623@ng-mb1.aol.com...
...>
> As an aside, one excuse I've heard (secondhand) is "I've got to have a TV for
> my kids." Has no-one heard of a public library, for god's sake.

Oh I don't know, it seems like a fair swap...

Joxer  16/7/00

-----------------------------------------------------------------