Unforgiving Minutes

Title: Unforgiving Minutes
Author: Helen Anthony hanthony@ionet.net
J/C: PG
Written 08/96

Disclaimer:
Star Trek, Star Trek: Voyager and the characters therein are the property of Paramount, who gave me no permission whatsoever to borrow them. No animals were harmed in the writing of this story.

No points for originality here. It's kind of like "Second Chances (TNG) meets Tuvix". But hey, I'm not getting paid for this.....


Unforgiving Minutes

Although Tuvok saw the logic to the situation, he was not pleased with it. However, true to his staid Vulcan nature his displeasure was imperceptible to anyone observing him. He sat in the Captain's chair, his face set in the same expressionless mask he seemed always to wear. He had been in almost the exact same position, both feet flat on the floor, back straight, head high, for the better part of the entire Alpha shift. He moved only occasionally to examine one of the monitors at his side. Had he lacked the ability to so completely control his emotions, were he victim to them as were so many other races, Tuvok would have been worried, maybe even a little frightened. Tuvok allowed himself only to be 'concerned'. It was only logical that the chief security officer would be concerned for his captain and first officer in such a situation.

"Still no contact from the Captain or Commander Chakotay," the voice of Ensign Harry Kim sounded behind him.

"Ensign, I do not require regular updates. I assume that you will notify me immediately if they contact us."

"Yes sir."

The bridge returned to silence. Only the gentle hum that is always part of the background noise on Voyager could be heard.

"Lieutenant Tuvok," said Tom Paris, turning around his seat at the conn to face the command center, "it's been over five hours. Maybe we should hail them."

"Captain Janeway left strict orders that the negotiations were to be disturbed only in the case of a dire emergency," replied Tuvok. "I do not consider your impatience to be emergent."

Duly chastised Tom turned back to face the conn and drummed his fingers on the panel, not that there was anything for him to do. Voyager had not moved for the better part of the past two days. The view screen showed the image another motionless vessel 100 kilometers directly in front of Voyager. Tom had stared at this ship for so long that he still saw it when he closed his eyes and rubbed his hand over his face. The base of the ship was a large flat disc, on top of which rested a dome. The more he looked at his the more he decided it looked like the quintessential 'flying saucer' humans frequently reported seeing in the early years of space travel. Tom laughed to himself, maybe the Escondians had visited earth nearly 500 years ago in one of these vessels. Maybe the reports of Martians in flying saucers weren't completely mythical. Tom stared at the view screen until his vision blurred, wondering if there was another pilot on the bridge of the Escondian vessel who was as tired of looking at Voyager as Tom was of looking at their ship. In spite of the seeming benign nature of the Escondians Tom didn't like the fact that his captain had been on their vessel for so long without contacting Voyager.

A tone and flash of light on the conn panel brought Tom to immediate attention. "Lieutenant Tuvok," he said, "I'm detecting a dense plasma storm forming about 600 kilometers off of our port bow."

"Lieutenant Tuvok, we're being hailed!" Harry exclaimed almost simultaneously. Nobody was bored now.

"On screen, Ensign." Tuvok rose to his feet, still calm and unaffected.

The image of Captain Kathryn Janeway, and her first officer appeared on the view screen. They were seated at a conference table, several Escondians were visible in the background. "Lieutenant Tuvok," she said, "our negotiations here are complete. The Escondians have graciously agreed to allow us to pass through their space. The Commander and I are ready to return to Voyager."

"Captain Janeway," one of the Escondians spoke, "we're detecting an emerging plasma storm. It should intercept us in less than a minute. Can your crew safely retrieve you or would you like to wait out the storm here?"

Janeway cast a questioning glance in Tuvok's direction, "Mr. Tuvok?"

"Bridge to transporter room one, do you have a lock on the Captain and Commander Chakotay?" asked Tuvok.

"Yes sir," replied the transporter chief's voice, "we can initiate transport at any time."

Janeway turned to her hosts, "Transport takes less than five seconds."

"You have almost 40 seconds," replied the Escondian.

"Energize," instructed Janeway.

The image of Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay disappeared from the view screen in a sparkle of light. Tuvok was just old enough to remember the early days of transporter technology. The younger members of the crew, Kim, Torres, Wildman, took it for granted that people were routinely reduced to a stream of matter and pulled thousand of kilometers across space before being held in a pattern buffer and re-materialized. Tuvok took nothing for granted. As a child he'd seen transporter accidents, as a youth he'd heard about them first hand from the instructors at the Vulcan Science Academy. Even Vulcans like to tell their 'war stories'.

Tuvok was considering the thousands of things that can go wrong during a routine transport when something did. Voyager reeled and bucked, as though hit by weapons fire. Tuvok fell back and braced himself on the arm of the captain's chair, "Report!"

"An energy synapse erupted from the plasma storm." reported Harry Kim.

"Bridge to transporter room one. Report," ordered Tuvok.

"The Captain and Commander Chakotay arrived safely, Lieutenant. The transport was a success," transporter chief Wilson sounded more than a little relieved.

The Captain and Commander Chakotay stepped down from the transporter pad. Janeway put her hand on Wilson's shoulder and gave a brief squeeze. "Thank you, chief. It's been a long day. It's good to be home." She turned to Chakotay as they approached the door to the corridor, "Commander, I think we should both grab some dinner and then meet in my ready room for debriefing."

"Agreed," replied Chakotay.

"Umm, Captain," said Wilson, "something's wrong here." Both Janeway and Chakotay turned and joined Wilson at the transporter control console. "I still show two patterns in the buffer."

"Could you have locked on to any of the Escondians?" asked Chakotay.

"No sir, I locked on to your com badges. I only transported two signatures."

"Whatever it is you had better energize before the patterns begin to degrade," ordered Janeway.

Janeway nodded to Wilson who ran his hands over the controls to materialize the patterns in the buffer. Two figures materialized, then collapsed on the transporter pad. Two humans, in red and black Starfleet uniforms. Janeway and Chakotay approached the figures and knelt above them. Their eyes then turned to each other in complete astonishment. It was as though they had looked in a mirror.

"Ohmygosh," said Wilson. "It's you two!"

********************
B'Elanna Torres liked Captain Janeway. Really, she did. The captain had given B'Elanna a chance to prove her skills as Chief Engineer even when B'Elanna had given up on herself. Captain Janeway had allowed B'Elanna the freedom to do her job creatively and had forgiven some major lapses of judgment. And the captain was herself a scientist. She shared B'Elanna's appreciation of the beauty of technology. B'Elanna Torres liked Captain Janeway, she just wished the captain were not in her way right now. B'Elanna and Wilson were hovered over the control console in the transporter room, Janeway standing what seemed to be a few millimeters behind them.

"Could there have been a pattern echo?" asked Janeway. "Perhaps the signal bounced off the energy synapse and created an echo."

"I don't think it was an echo, Captain," said Torres.

"Transporter echo signals are seldom coherent enough to re-materialize. Our doubles appear to be completely whole." Janeway had moved to the console, practically nudging B'Elanna out of the way as she accessed more information from the transporter log.

'Deep breath, B'Elanna,' Torres said to herself. Klingon or not, one does not lose one's temper with one's captain. "Captain," B'Elanna offered out loud, "I think Wilson and I can handle things here if you want to go to sick bay. I'm sure you're concerned about your ... double."

"B'Elanna, are you trying to get rid of me?" asked Janeway. Without waiting for an answer she smiled and continued, "All right. I'll give you two hours before I start driving you crazy again."

"Thank you, Captain."

Janeway walked out the door into the corridor, turned over her shoulder and said, "You'll let me know the second you find anything."

"Of course Captain," B'Elanna managed to reply before the door closed behind Janeway. B'Elanna and Wilson looked at each other, sighed, smiled and returned to work .

********************

Janeway entered sickbay to see Commander Chakotay standing over a diagnostic bed looking at his double who lay unconscious, a bio-monitor covering most of his torso.

"How are they?" Janeway asked.

"They're fine," said the Doctor, emerging from his office. "And they are genetically identical to you and Commander Chakotay."

"Why are they still unconscious?" Janeway asked, peering down at herself.

"That is an after-effect of having remained in the pattern buffer for longer than is recommended," explained the Doctor. "Most transporter accidents are followed by a brief period of unconsciousness and minor disorientation.

"I would imagine that when these two wake up they will have more than *minor* disorientation," said Janeway.

"Doctor," said Chakotay, turning his double's head slightly to the right so that the left side of his forehead was visible. "He doesn't have a tattoo. Could they be from another dimension?"

"That is not likely," replied the Doctor. "I have detected no indications of phase shifts and no anomalous readings associated with time or dimension incongruities."

"If they are duplicates of us why doesn't that Chakotay have a tattoo?" asked Janeway.

"I do not have the answer to that question," replied the Doctor. "Perhaps when they wake up you can ask him."

"When will that be?" asked Chakotay.

"I don't know for certain. Probably within the next few hours," said the Doctor. "Right now I would like to let them rest. While there is nothing medically wrong with them they obviously need the recuperative power of sleep or they would be awake."

"Torres to Captain Janeway," B'Elanna's voice came over Janeway's com badge.

"Janeway here."

"I think we have something. Can we meet in the briefing room?"

"Of course, Lieutenant. We're on our way. Janeway out." The captain again hit her com badge again as she and Chakotay left sick bay and entered a turbo lift. "All senior officers report to the briefing room immediately." .

********************

Transporter Chief Wilson found himself the center of attention in the briefing room. Wilson was a shy man. He was a good officer, but not an outstanding public speaker. To suddenly have to the focus of the entire senior staff directed at him made him a bit nervous. "Captain," he began, "Commander." His eyes then focused on Tuvok. Should he address Tuvok too? "Lieutenant," he stammered. He looked around the table. He wasn't sure of protocol in this situation. Should he individually address each person seated at the table or should he just begin to report his findings?

"B'Elanna said you found something," Janeway encouraged.

"Yes ma'am, Captain." Wilson turned to a display of transporter logs showing on the large screen on the wall. "It appears that the energy synapse hit the ship just as you and Commander Chakotay were materializing on to Voyager. The energy burst actually infiltrated your molecular pattern during the final nano-seconds of transport and divided all of your cell matter ."

"It acted as a gene splicer, so to speak, dividing and replicating your genetic structure." said B'Elanna. "As your patterns materialized they were immediately replaced by the genetically identical patterns."

"That would explain why Commander Chakotay's tattoo is missing. It is not part of his cellular structure," said Janeway. "So it would seem that we have two new crew members." Janeway was always the practical one. Never mind the personal implications of having a 'twin' on Voyager. It wasn't the first time she'd faced another version of herself on this journey. Although, it appeared that this one was coming along for the ride. But she would have to sort out her feelings later. There was still more business that needed attending.

Janeway rose to her feet and motioned for B'Elanna and Wilson to be seated. "I see no reason for this to delay our journey through Escondian space. As I mentioned earlier the Prime Minister has given us permission to pass through their territory." With the push of a few buttons she changed the terminal display from the transporter logs to a stellar cartography display. "The Escondians have provided us with a map of their space. As you can see this section of the quadrant is plagued with plasma storms, much like the Badlands near Deep Space Nine," she said. " The Escondians lay claim to a relatively storm-free corridor which passes through the center of the plasma storm fields. It is known by neighboring worlds as the 'Escondian Canal'. It's the safest way to pass through this region. There are, however, some security concerns. Mr. Tuvok will brief us on those."

Janeway yielded the floor to Tuvok who said, "There is a faction within the Escondian homeworld which is at odds with the official Escondian government. This faction of dissidents, called the 'Libertarians' feel that the Escondian government does not represent the needs of all of its citizens. They have been attempting an insurrection for many years. It is their intention to overthrow the official government and replace it with their own."

"How does this affect us?" asked Tom.

"If you will allow me to continue," Tuvok said. "These Libertarians have been known to attack vessels passing through the Escondian canal. Since the Libertarians have limited resources they have found piracy to be an effective way to supplement their fleet. Their numbers have grown to the point that the Escondians cannot guarantee our safety. They have authorized us to use whatever force is necessary to protect Voyager from attempted piracy by the Libertarians."

"It will take us at least two weeks to complete our passage through this space," added Chakotay. "We'll need to stay on our toes."

"I think that about covers it for now," said Janeway. She was finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate. "Dismissed." The room emptied except for Janeway, who remained standing and Chakotay who remained in his seat.

"Would you like to go back to sick bay?" asked Chakotay. "I'll go by the mess hall and grab us some dinner."

"Thank you, Chakotay. I would like to be there when they wake".

********************

Neither of them had much of an appetite for dinner, but they ate it. Their motions were automated; fork to mouth, chew, swallow. More than two years in the Delta Quadrant had taught them that taste was now secondary to nutrition. Eating had become an act of discipline. This particular meal was being consumed under the scowling supervision of the Doctor, who did not appreciate his sick bay being used as a dining hall.

When the Doctor disappeared in to his office Janeway let her impatience get the best of her, "I can't take this any more." She walked to Chakotay's double, the bio-monitor had been removed and replaced by a surgical gown and thermal sheet, and shook his shoulder, "Chakotay, wake up."

Chakotay, the original Chakotay, had taken his last bite of food. He held a napkin to his mouth and laughed into it. "Hey, leave me alone! Wake her up!" With a gesture of his hand he indicated Janeway's double.

Janeway's gentle shake was enough to nudge the Chakotay double into consciousness. His eyes opened, darted around the room to familiarize himself with his surroundings, and focused back on Janeway. "Captain." he said, greeting her. He then looked back to his left and saw Janeway's double lying on the other diagnostic bed, "Captain?" he repeated, uncertainly. He raised up on his elbows, caught sight of himself across the room, and for a moment watched himself watching himself. One of him looked a little bewildered, but amused, the other just bewildered.

"Hello, Brother," said Chakotay, rising from his seat and walking to the diagnostic bed. "This is going to take some explaining." .

********************

"There are security issues to be addressed." Voyager's Vulcan chief of security stood in Captain Janeway's ready room. Janeway sat at her desk, Chakotay on the couch.

"Do you think they pose a threat to the ship?" Janeway asked Tuvok. She glanced across the ready room at Chakotay, whose face was an expressionless mask.

"At this point," said Tuvok, "there is no reason to believe that they pose a threat to the ship. However, there are certain command codes which should be known by only the captain and first officer. Your doubles currently have access to this codes."

"Tuvok, you realize that *they* are *us*, myself and Commander Chakotay. They would no more attempt to harm Voyager than we would."

"Captain, may I speak freely?" asked Tuvok.

"Of course."

"*They* ceased to be *you* at the moment of division. From this point on they are unique and separate individuals. Unless it is your wish to share command with your double I would recommend changing the codes."

Janeway looked at Chakotay, "Commander?"

"I agree with Tuvok." His reply came as a surprise. Perhaps he'd been betrayed one too many times in the past two years. Now he didn't even trust himself.

"Very well, Tuvok. Commander Chakotay and I will change all level four security command codes." He was right, of course. And once again Janeway was grateful for his counsel. "Thank you Tuvok." Tuvok nodded once. "You're dismissed, if you need to go." She knew he needed to go. He was already late for his standing weekly 'date' with Kes. Janeway waited for a few seconds after the door had closed behind Tuvok before addressing Chakotay, "You didn't put up much of a fight, Commander."

"I know how to pick my battles, Captain. Tuvok doesn't trust me. He's certainly not going to trust a facsimile of me."

"Chakotay, don't you think you're being a little harsh?"

"Am I?" Chakotay often wondered how much persuading Janeway had to do to get Tuvok to accept him.

"When you first came on board Tuvok had some concerns, but I think those were resolved long ago."

"The Jonas investigation wasn't that long ago." Chakotay attempted a wry grin. Chakotay was by nature a trusting man. Trusting and loyal, but his trusting nature had been put to the test in the past few years. Betrayed first by Starfleet, then Tuvok, then Seska, then the worst betrayal of all - Janeway. Her exclusion of him from the Jonas investigation was a betrayal of her faith in his ability to do his job. After the investigation she'd said that she had not wanted him to be in a position of dividing his loyalties. Her words were a poor salve for old wounds that were slashed open before they had a chance to heal. Chakotay continued, "Our chief of security has demonstrated more faith in Tom Paris than he has in me. Ironic isn't it? That Tuvok is the only one on this ship who has betrayed both of us."

Chakotay had wisely never before broached the subject Tuvok's participation in the disastrous attempt to steal the space folder from the Sikkarians. Janeway raised her eyebrows, "Commander, I don't like where this conversation is going."

Chakotay looked out the window before turning back to her. "Okay. That wasn't fair." He drew a breath, "I don't much care what Tuvok thinks about me, but I'm feeling a bit protective towards my 'brother'. He deserves to be given a chance."

"Oh, Chakotay. What are we going to do with them?"

"Do you think that's for us to decide? They should have a say in it. Have you spent any time with her?"

"Some. It's only been two days. I'm giving her room to adjust. The first time I went to her quarters I noticed how bare it was so we went through and divided our personal effects between us. It was like some bizarre divorce settlement." And that was the difference between them. While Janeway saw it as a division, a part of herself amputated, Chakotay saw it as a reunion, a long lost brother returning home.

"You know, Captain., we have a lot more than security issues to be concerned about," said Chakotay. His face was grave. He leaned forward on the couch, frowning, "I don't think this ship is capable of producing enough coffee for two Janeways." He waited for her smile to cue his own. He'd gotten a smile out of her. Mission accomplished. "Captain, the Doctor says he's ready to release them for duty. Come to my quarters tomorrow afternoon and we can all talk about what we're going to do with them."

"Don't you think we should have that conference in here?" with a sweep of her hand she indicated her ready room.

He shook his head, "How would you feel about being called into your own ready room? Remember, three days ago this was her ship, too." .

********************

Janeway paused at Chakotay's door. She had timed it perfectly - exactly 15:00 hours. She sounded the tone and a deep voice bid her to enter. Chakotay and his double were seated at the table in the center of the room, Janeway's double on the couch. The doubles were dressed in casual, civilian clothes. It looked as though the three of them had been there a while. Chakotay held a dermal pigmentation stylus in his hand. His full attention was focused on the tattoo that he was imprinting on his double's forehead.

"Watch the eye! Watch the eye!" the double warned.

"I'm watching it. Don't worry."

"I tried to convince him to put it on the right side so we could still tell them apart," said Janeway's double.

"You can tell us apart," muttered Chakotay. "I'm the good looking one." He grinned at his double who feigned a look of disgust. "There, I'm done. It's perfect." Chakotay sat back to admire his work. The double held up a mirror and nodded.

"What do you think?" the double turned his head for Janeway to see.

She walked to him and closely examined both his tattoo and Chakotay's. "Looks good," she said.

Chakotay turned in his chair to face the Janeway double seated on the couch. He pointed the stylus at her, "Now where did you say you wanted that dragon?"

The Captain's jaw dropped in amazement. It was uncomfortable enough to have a carbon copy on the loose. She couldn't imagine what it was going to be like if the carbon copy had no inhibitions. Her double shook her head, laughing, "Don't worry, Captain. He's pulling your leg. I did not request a tattoo."

Janeway couldn't contain her sigh of relief. She scowled at the Chakotays who wore identical wicked grins. Having a double seemed to have relaxed Chakotay. His infamous twisted sense of humor was raring its head more often. "I hate to spoil the mood of this party but we have some decisions to make," said Janeway.

"Please have a seat," said Chakotay.

Janeway sat beside herself on the couch. "I guess first of all we should discuss names," she began. "I'm not even sure what to call you."

"I've been thinking about that," said the woman next to Janeway. "Since no one on this ship refers to you by name, maybe I could go by Kathryn"

"That sounds like a good idea - Kathryn," said Janeway. "What about you two?"

"I think we should call him *Tom* Chakotay," offered Chakotay. He and his double burst into a fit of laughter at their little inside joke. They had encountered Tom Riker, who also came into existence as the result of a transporter accident, during his time with the Maquis.

"Actually," said Chakotay's double, "I was thinking that I would like to be called Tsoai." The two men exchanged a knowing smile.

"That's an interesting name," said Janeway.

"It's from a Kiowa legend," said Tsoai, "about a boy who turned in to a bear."

"But you're not Kiowa," said Kathryn.

"That's true," said Tsoai. "But I like the story, and you once told me that I seemed like the 'bear' type."

Janeway felt a pang of jealousy, a feeling of possession over the memories that she thought were hers, but now realized were shared. It was not just she and Chakotay that sat in her ready room when he introduced her to her spirit guide, it was the four of them. Just as it was the four of them who argued about how to integrate the Maquis in the crew and the four of them who, for the past two years, had carefully built a relationship that was showed some potential of stretching beyond that of captain and first officer.

"I think we will all be in agreement," said Kathryn, "that there is room for only one captain and one first officer on this ship."

"Kathryn and I have discussed this," said Tsoai. "We don't want to do anything to disrupt the chain of command on Voyager. I think we can find ways to serve the ship without interfering with your authority."

"I'm actually looking forward to being a science officer again," said Kathryn. "I've always been a science officer at heart. It might be nice to focus on it again without the distractions of command." She was lying. She knew it and Janeway knew it, but they continued to play the game. " I'd like to work in Engineering for a while."

"That's an excellent idea," said Janeway.

"Voyager needs more experienced pilots," added Tsoai. "And I could assist Tuvok in matters of security and in the continued training of the Maquis in Starfleet protocol."

"What about rank?" asked Chakotay. "I don't see any problem with Tsoai being a commander, but as you said, there is room for only one captain."

"I see no reason for me to have a designated rank," said Kathryn. "For the sake of synthesis I'll wear a uniform, but without pips."

"That hardly seems fair," noted Janeway. "We worked long and hard for those pips."

"I didn't come to this decision easily," said Kathryn. "But my first responsibility is for the good of the crew, and the crew needs a single identifiable leader. I can't think of an acceptable alternative. I'm not willing to lower my rank, but I am willing to be without one. Let's just say that as a general rule I answer only to you."

"Agreed," said Janeway. She allowed a moment of silence to solidify their decision before continuing, "The Doctor says you may begin duty whenever you feel ready."

"I'm ready," said Tsoai. He glanced at Kathryn, "You?" She nodded. He put a hand on Chakotay's shoulder, "Commander, I guess you can work us in to the duty rotation however you see fit."

"What I want to know," said Kathryn, "is who is going to break the bad news to B'Elanna that I'll be working for her?" .

********************

Kathryn sat in the mess hall reflecting on how smooth the transition from captain to engineer appeared to have gone. At least she hoped it appeared to have been a smooth transition. In truth it had been agonizing for her. She longed for the bridge, for her ready room. But that wasn't her place any more. She wasn't the Captain any more. In a matter of seconds a transporter accident had taken away everything for which she had worked. She kept telling herself to focus on the needs of the ship, not her own selfishness. Kathryn looked at the man who had just entered the door of the mess hall. Which one was he? The uniform, Maquis pips and tattoo were all identical. He glanced across the room, his eyes found her and he smiled. Then she knew. He was the impostor, just like she was. She was able to read that in his smile. As first officer he's share that transforming smile with his captain only on rare occasions. But this Chakotay, who called himself Tsoai, shared the smile with his ship-mate Kathryn easily. He crossed to her and sat. "Good morning, Kathryn. Did you have a pleasant shift?"

"Pleasant enough," she replied. "It may take me a while to adjust to the graveyard shift. I think my body is still on Alpha Shift time."

"Standard protocol. The newest crew members take the night shift."

"Can't you do something about that?" she asked. "I'd think that you would have some influence with the first officer." The latter part of her sentence was rendered nearly unintelligible by a poorly stifled yawn. "Excuse me," she said.

"Trouble sleeping?"

"Oh it's awful," Kathryn said. "I'm groggy for the first few hours of my shift, but when I try to sleep I just lie awake. I may have to break down and get something from the doctor."

"Oh I'd hate for it to come to that. I have an idea." He stood and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Wait here." She watched him disappear into the kitchen. Kathryn closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead where yet another headache was taking hold. She hoped that whatever sleep remedy he was concocting would get rid of this nagging headache for good.

He returned a few minutes later with a thermos, "You should probably drink this in your quarters. It's effect on some people is immediate."

"Thank you," she said. She stood, took the thermos from him, and took a step towards the door before turning back to him. "Are there any special instructions that go with this or will I figure it out on my own?" Her question was an invitation for him to join her. He accepted the invitation, following her.

Captain Janeway was on the turbolift when they boarded it. "Good morning, Captain," said Kathryn.

Janeway smiled broadly, "Good morning. Sleeping any better?"

"Not yet," Kathryn held up the thermos, "but our friend here promises this will do the trick."

"Commander, I hope you're not drugging my crew," said Janeway.

"Just warm milk and a little flavoring," he replied.

They rode for a few more decks in silence before arriving at the deck housing their quarters. Kathryn and Tsoai left Janeway on the lift as she continued towards the bridge.

"I don't think she's as comfortable with me as Chakotay is with you," noted Kathryn as they passed through the corridor.

"I've noticed that," he said. They were at the door to her quarters now. She keyed the pad and they entered. Tsoai continued, "Why do you think that is?"

Kathryn placed the thermos on the table and sat on the couch, motioning for him to sit also. He took a seat on the couch, but not too close. They were turned towards each other with about a half meter of space between them. Kathryn considered her answer to his question. "With the captain - I think that she - that *we* pride ourselves in our self discipline. It's very important to us that we always be in control of ourselves. It must be difficult for her to see another version of herself over whom she has no control." She pursed her lips in thought and continued. "And I think she knows how difficult this has been for me - how difficult it would have been for her. And I must admit, it's a little disconcerting to have someone on board who knows you so well. There are times when I can almost read her mind. Just now in the turbolift for example, I can tell you that she was concerned about encountering these Libertarians. The longer we go without seeing them the more concerned she gets. In fact, I bet that she's on her way to meet with Tuvok and Chakotay to review the status of the ship's defenses and discuss security measures."

Tsoai couldn't resist challenging her on this. His hand went to his combadge, "Tsoai to Chakotay."

"Chakotay here."

"You busy?"

"Actually, right now I am. I have a meeting with Tuvok and the Captain. Did you need something?"

Tsoai cocked an eyebrow at Kathryn who gave him a smug 'told you so' smile. "No, that's fine. I'll catch you later."

"Chakotay out."

"You do know her well,." Tsoai laughed. "Did you see her expression when Chakotay asked you where you wanted your tattoo? She thought her worst fears had been realized."

"I think you really caught her off guard on that." She leaned towards him, "especially since I'm not really the 'dragon' type." Her voice dropped to a low whisper, "However, I have considered a small tattoo of Voyager," her hand moved to her left hip, indicating a spot several inches below her waist line, "right here." His eyes fixed on the spot below her hand, Tsoai could feel his heart pounding. The idea was appealing, but he wondered if he could control his trembling hands enough to actually apply a tattoo to that particular portion of her anatomy. As dozens of mental images flashed through his mind he heard Kathryn chuckle softly. Her hand came to his chin and lifted his face, "You can close your mouth now, Commander. I think it's safe to say that the Janeway twins have their revenge."

He shook his head, "You are an evil, evil woman. Is this the sort of thing you Janeways try to keep under control?"

"Try, but always successfully."

"Yes," he said, "I do seem to remember a comment to the effect that if you had any questions on mating behaviors I was the man to see."

"Mmmmm," she nodded, "I have a feeling that one is going to haunt me for a long time." She scooted towards the edge of the couch and picked up the thermos. "So are you going to tell me what's in this?"

"Just what I told the Captain," he took the thermos from her hands, opened it, and poured some in a mug, "warm milk and flavoring."

She took a sip, "Warm milk and liquor is more like it." His only response was a smile. "Where did you get real alcohol?" she asked.

"Oh, you'd be surprised what we find on those away missions."

He was right about the drink having an immediate effect. Her head was beginning to cloud. She took another long drink, stood and walked to the window. She feared that if she remained on the comfortable couch she would pass out in front of him. "I'll have to get included in some of those away missions now that I have more freedom to leave the ship." She stared out the window for a few moments, again trying to decide how she was going to find her place on this ship. When she turned around to address Tsoai again she found him standing in front of her at arms length.

"What else are you going to do with this new found freedom?" he asked.

"I don't know. My whole life I've had such specific direction and purpose. First it was acceptance to Star Fleet, then graduation with honors, then climbing the ranks of command. I feel like I've lost my compass."

"It's not enough to be a good officer, to be a scientist, an explorer?" he asked.

"To what end?" She finally allowed her frustrations to show. Her voice had an edge of anger. "We'll be here 70 years. It's not like I'll get another command."

"To the end of being a good officer. To the end of being a scientist. To the end of being an explorer." He put his hands on her shoulders. "Are you only successful in life if you can measure that success by pips or promotions?"

She pulled away from him and walked to the edge of the couch, sitting against the arm. "I don't want to spend the rest of my life adjusting warp field generator coils or re-aligning matter reactant injectors."

He turned and leaned against the window where she had been, "But what if that's what needs to be done? Kathryn, fate is not always kind. It doesn't much care about our plans or desires. It can be quite unforgiving."

"What was it Kipling said, "If you can fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run ...."

"... then yours is the world and everything that's in it, and which is more, you'll be a man, my son," he finished for her. "It's not exactly gender appropriate," he chuckled. "Kathryn, do you have the courage to fill the unforgiving minutes with adjusting warp field generator coils and re-aligning matter reactant injectors?"

"It's hardly a grand accomplishment."

"I believe that we sometimes put too much value on 'accomplishments'. Look at the Navajo sand painters. They will spend a lifetime learning their craft and spend days completing a sand painting. Then, almost as soon as it is finished it is destroyed. To the eyes of the outside word they have 'accomplished' nothing." He moved closer to her, hoping that she would understand what he was about to say. "But they place no value on the finished product. The beauty is in the process." Kathryn nodded to herself. He continued, "That is how it must be for us - here - on Voyager. We may have nothing to show for this journey but the journey itself, and how we conduct ourselves on it."

"The beauty is in the process?" Kathryn repeated. "I'm afraid I've always been a results-oriented person. I'm not sure how easily I can make that transition. But thank you for saying it." She put her hand on his arm, just below the elbow. Using him as leverage she pulled herself off the arm of the couch, but began to sway a little. She caught herself by grasping his other arm. "I guess your nightcap is having an effect." The headache was still with her. Perhaps sleep would rid her of it. Her hands dropped and closed around his. They stood for a moment, smiling at one another, enjoying the physical contact. This was not the first time either of them had entertained thoughts of where their relationship could go without the restraints of protocol.

"I'll let you sleep then." He released her and walked to the door. She followed close behind. At the door he turned, "Good night, Kathryn." Then, on impulse, an impulse he didn't dare stop to analyze, he pulled her close and gently kissed her, just long enough for her arms to close around his back and for her lips to respond briefly. "Well, good night then." He repeated, not moving.

"Good night," she grinned.

"Okay - good night." He stood awkwardly, then finally turned and walked to the corridor. 'Oh, that was smooth,' he shook his head. 'You haven't been that smooth since you were fourteen.' He blamed his awkwardness on the dull headache that had been nagging him for the better part of the past two days. .

********************

He'd always had vivid dreams. His dreams tonight were a jumble of images and sounds. He saw the disappointment on his father's face when he told him he wanted to enter Star Fleet, the image of himself in the mirror when he tried on his first uniform, his first love, his father's funeral, Janeway's face on the viewscreen of his battered Maquis ship, the surprise and delight in Kathryn's eyes when he moved to kiss her. The images were flashing, bleeding in to one another. Then he heard a sound, an intrusion into his thoughts, "Sickbay to Tsoai." He tried to block out the sounds. "Sickbay to Commander Tsoai." He pulled the pillow over his head. Who the hell is Tsoai? "Sickbay to Commander Tsoai. Please respond." Oh wait a minute, he's Tsoai isn't he? Or is he Chakotay? It took a moment for his mind to clear. He sat up in bed and fumbled for his com badge on the night stand. "Tsoai here."

"Commander, this is the Doctor. Please report to sick bay immediately."

"Acknowledged." He automatically rose from the bed and began to dress. He was zipping his jump suit before it occurred to him that he should have asked why he was reporting to sick bay immediately. He checked the chronometer on his way out the door. It was 08:30 hours. Mid-evening for most of the crew, but the middle of the night for him. His shift began in two and a half hours.

There was a welcoming committee in sick bay, Commander Chakotay, Captain Janeway, Kes, the Doctor. All of them looking too serious for this to be anything good. He saw Kathryn seated on a diagnostic bed. "What's wrong?" He went to her side immediately.

"I thought it was just a bad headache." She took his hand and squeezed it.

"Commander," said the Doctor, gesturing to another diagnostic bed. "Could you please lie here. I need to run a full neurological scan."

"Why?" He looked at Kathryn. "What's going on?"

"Please, do as he says. We'll tell you everything after the scan."

Tsoai lay uncomfortably on the bed. A neuro-scanner was placed over his head. The Doctor and Kes studied the scan intently, then gave each other somber looks. "You may sit up now," said the Doctor after removing the scanner. Tsoai patiently waited for the Doctor to explain.

"Have you been suffering headaches, dizziness, loss of equilibrium?" the Doctor asked.

"Headaches yes, constantly. I thought it was just a combination of stress and too many changes."

"Unfortunately that is not the case," said the Doctor. The Doctor had been struggling to improve his bedside manner and include gentleness and compassion as part of his medical treatment. There was no gentle way to say what he was about to say. "As you know the transporter accident that created you was not technically a cloning process. Cloning is the result of a single cell being removed from a living entity and allowed to grow and develop, thus creating another life form. In the case of complex life forms such as humans it is tedious and slow, taking as long as the normal gestational and growth process. Rather than being a clone you are, in fact, a crude copy of Commander Chakotay's cell structure. Rather, his cell structure at the time of the accident."

"Crude?"

"Yes. The cell replication was adequate for your simpler processes; digestion, breathing, circulation. These are basic. However, your neural processes are far more complex than these others. And your neural processes are failing. The 'copy' is inadequate. It cannot maintain integrity." The Doctor paused and drew a deep breath. The emotional aspect of his adaptive programming was beginning to cause him some discomfort. "Your neural processes will continue to degrade until there is complete breakdown of all synaptic pathways."

"You're telling me that I'm dying?" Tsoai asked. He motioned towards Kathryn. "That we're dying."

"Yes," said the Doctor. "I've compared your current scans to the scans I took shortly after the accident. Based on the rate of degradation complete failure will occur within a week."

"We have a week?" he wanted to make certain that he heard the Doctor correctly.

"*Complete* degradation will occur within a week," clarified the Doctor. "You will be incapacitated in two or three days."

Tsoai moved to Kathryn's bed and draped an arm over her shoulders. "I have to ask if there is anything you can do," he said to the Doctor.

"I regret to inform you," said the Doctor, "that I am unable to devise a treatment."

Tosia nodded solemnly, stood and offered a hand to Kathryn. She shook her head, gripping the diagnostic bed for stability, "I need to be alone."

He nodded, "I understand." To Chakotay he said, "I'd like to use the medicine bundle."

Chakotay placed his hand on his twin's shoulder, "You know where it is. Keep it as long as you need."

Tsoai nodded and walked towards the door. Suddenly he found himself thrown across sick bay as Voyager reeled under the impact of a detonation. Chakotay, the Captain, and Kes, unprepared for impact, were also knocked off of their feet. Only the Doctor, whose program had adapted instantly and made compensations for the ship's sudden lurch, and Kathryn, who had been clutching the side of the bed, were not thrown to the floor. Kathryn's hand flew to her com badge, "Report, Mr. Tuvok!" Captain Janeway pulled herself to her feet and looked at her double, 'Room for only one captain?' she thought.

Tuvok's voice came through Kathryn's com badge, "We struck a mine, Captain." Tuvok, of course, had no idea which of the Janeways had hailed him. Their voices were identical and he probably didn't take the time to check the com signal assignment. The Captain felt her stomach clench. This was no time for a power struggle. "The mine was cloaked," Tuvok continued, "It stands to reason that this mine was not the only one in the area. I have brought Voyager to a full stop until we can adapt our sensors to detect them."

"Very good, Mr. Tuvok," Janeway responded. Her eyes were locked with Kathryn's as she spoke. "Commander Chakotay and I are on our way to the bridge."

"I'll get to engineering to help B'Elanna modify the sensors," said Kathryn, rising to her feet. She passed Janeway on her way to the door. "It was instinct, Captain. An automatic reaction. I said that I wouldn't undermine your authority, and I won't." .

********************

Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay found only more trouble waiting when they arrived on the bridge. "Captain, an unidentified vessel is approaching. It will be within weapons range in 45 seconds," reported Tuvok.

Janeway and Chakotay moved directly to their stations. "What is our weapons status?" inquired Janeway.

"All weapons are on line. Phaser banks are powered," replied Tuvok.

"Captain, we're being hailed," said Kim.

"On screen."

A familiar face appeared on the view screen. It was Kando, the Escondian Minister of Foreign Affairs. "Captain Janeway, it is good to see you again."

"Minister Kando, our ship has struck a mine," said Janeway "I was not informed that we would encounter mines,"

"The Escondian government is not responsible for this mine field, Captain. The Libertarians are. The mine field was created only yesterday."

"Do you have the coordinates of the mines?" asked Janeway.

"Yes," said Kando. "I was responsible for laying them."

"But I thought you said this was a Libertarian mine field," Janeway's mouth formed the words even as her mind had already made the connection. Kando was a Libertarian operative.

"It is, Captain," said Kando. "You may surrender Voyager to the United Libertarian Forces now, or we will take it by force."

"There will be no surrender," said Janeway. She turned to Kim, it took only a dart of her eyes for him to know that she wanted the transmission termination. Kim's fingers flew across the control panel and Kando's image disappeared from the view screen. "These Delta Quadrant races are a little slow to catch on that we don't go quietly."

"Captain, they're powering their weapons," said Tuvok.

"Janeway to engineering. How are we doing with the sensor modifications?"

"We've adapted the sensors to detect quantam phase variations," said B'Elanna, "but we're still not finding anything. Kathryn thinks we should initiate wide band EM emissions from the front defector array. They should bounce off of the mines and create a reflection that our sensors will detect."

"Excellent idea. How long will it take to modify the deflector?"

"Less than two minutes."

"Let's hope our shields can hold that long. I'm not anxious to try evasive maneuvers in a mine field."

The first blast from the Libertarian ship hit Voyager.

"Report!" ordered Janeway.

"Shields are holding, Captain," replied Kim. "Minor damage only."

"Mr. Tuvok, return fire."

Another phaser blast from the Libertarians.

"Shields down to 72%," said Kim. "They're targeting area is less than one square meter. Shields there aren't going to hold for long."

"Fire at will, Mr. Tuvok."

"They're firing fusion torpedos," said Tuvok.

The impact from the torpedo's sent the bridge crew sprawling. Sparks flew from the conn and weapons panel.

"B'Elanna - I need good news!" said Janeway.

"Almost, Captain."

"Captain," said Kim. "Shields have buckled. We cannot sustain another direct hit."

"Tom, begin evasive maneuvers."

Flying blind into a mine field was a little treacherous even for Tom Paris. However, the outcome of another hit by the Escondians weapon to the shield's weakest point was certain, and there was always a chance they might not hit another mine.

Tom initiated evasive maneuvers - and sent Voyager directly into a mine. All of Voyager's systems went off line for a second, leaving them in darkness until the back-up systems initiated an instant later.

"Hang in there, Tom," said Janeway.

"We just lost warp engines, weapons, and most secondary systems," said Kim.

"Engineering to bridge. We've intiated the EM emissions," reported B'Elanna. "It's working Captain. We can see the mines. I'm patching the information through to navigation."

"I've got it Captain," said Tom.

"Captain," said Chakotay. "I think retreat is our best option. Once we're clear of the field we can reverse the tractor beam and initiate a broad beam. It will push the mines to different positions. They'll still be cloaked so it should slow down the Libertarians."

"Everyone here that?" asked Janeway.

"Acknowledged," came the reply from Tuvok, Kim, B'Elanna and Paris simultaneously.

"Let's do it," said Janeway.

The Libertarians continued to fire as Voyager retreated out of the mine field at full impulse. "We're clear," announced Tom.

"Initiating reverse tractor," said Kim. Their success was rewarded as the Libertarian vessel immediately slammed in to its own mine.

"The Libertarian vessel has come to a full stop," said Tuvok. "We can assume that they will have their sensors modified to detect the mines in less than two minutes." Tom continued to take Voyager out of the Libertarian's weapon's range.

Voyager was out of danger for only the immediate moment. The ship was crippled, no warp power, no weapons, weakened shields.

"I need options now!" said Janeway.

"Captain," Tsoai had been waiting 'on deck', standing behind Ops. Had any of the bridge officers been incapacitated He would have immediately taken their place. "Perhaps we should consider hiding in the field of plasma storms. It could buy us some more time while we make repairs."

"If the Libertarians are smart they'll saturate the plasma field with proton bursts to drive us out," said Janeway.

"What if they thought Voyager had been destroyed by the plasma field?" offered B'Elanna. "Cargo Bay three is full of scrap metal from the repairs we made after that last battle with the Kazon. We could beam it off the ship and detonate it to create a debris field."

"That's a good idea, B'Elanna," said Janeway. "But I don't think the Libertarians will be easily fooled."

"They'd be fooled if they found an escape pod containing Voyager's captain and first officer," Kathryn's voice came over the com system.

Janeway looked at Chakotay. Both were puzzled.

"I know where she's going with this," said Tosia. "You could launch an escape pod containing Kathryn and myself. The Libertarians don't know about us. They'd never believe that you would abandon Voyager unless it had been destroyed."

"Captain," interrupted Tuvok. "The Libertarians have modified their sensors. They are navigating the mine field."

Janeway bit her lower lip. "Commander," she walked towards the science station, Chakotay followed. There was not time for withdrawal to her ready room. This conference would be held on the bridge.

"Captain, we must create a diversion. We don't stand a chance in battle right now," he whispered. "Without warp power we can't even retreat."

"It's too dangerous. The escape pod might not even survive long enough to escape the plasma storms," she replied.

"They know the risks. This is the best chance to buy us some time."

Janeway had ordered members of her crew in to dangerous situations before. She was trying to reason to herself that this was no different. "Tom, take us into the plasma storms," she ordered. "Kathryn, you better put on some pips." .

********************

In the few moments it took them to board an escape pod Kathryn and Tsoai received constant instructions from Captain Janeway over their com badges, "Keep your subspace communication link open at all times. It will help us track you when we've finished our repairs. When you're taken on board the Libertarian vessel keep a low profile. Don't do anything to provoke them. We should have enough repairs complete in 24 hours to come after you. After you launch the pod you're not going to have much time before we detonate the decoy. Take the pod on a course at 038 mark 25. Maintain maximum thrusters until you're clear of the plasma field - then slow to 1/16 power." The instructions went on and on ...

The escape pod was cramped, but not incommodious. It was designed to carry at least a dozen crew members. Kathryn leaned over to Tsoai, covering their com badges with her hands. "I like to give orders don't I?" she whispered. He grinned and nodded.

"Captain, we're ready to launch the pod," said Kathryn.

"Acknowledged," said Janeway. "B'Elanna - after the escape pod is launched I want a thirty second delay before you detonate the decoy."

"Understood," replied B'Elanna.

"Launch the pod," said Janeway.

Compared to a shuttle the escape pod was a rough ride. Compared to Voyager it was like riding down train tracks on a bicycle. The pod's small engines strained audibly as they took it out of the plasma storm field, riding the crest of the explosion behind them.

Kathryn checked the sensors "The Libertarian vessel is about 150 thousand kilometers away. Their sensors should pick us up within 15 minutes." She rubbed her temples.

"Headache getting worse?" Tsoai asked.

"Yeah. The stuff the Doctor gave me has worn off. How about yours?"

"I can tell it's there." He noticed the adjustments she was making to the pod's systems. "What are you doing?"

"I'm disengaging the locator beacon and covering our tracks," she said. "In spite of our captain's heroic intentions, I don't want Voyager coming after us. It would be foolish for them to risk another confrontation just to save two crew members who have only a week to live anyway."

It made sense.

"I think we should decide what we're going to do when the Libertarians take us on board their ship," Kathryn continued.

"What makes you so sure they're not going to just destroy our escape pod?" asked Tsoai.

"Actually, that would be ideal." She watched Tsoai's surprised reaction and continued, "then I wouldn't have to worry about foolish rescue attempts. But since they have no reason to destroy the pod we can assume that we'll be their prisoners. I had Harry download our scans of the Libertarian vessel to the escape pod's computer. It looks like main engineering is here," she pointed to the pod's small display screen. "I'm certain that if I could get to engineering I could disable some of their weapons and defensive systems."

"You want to try to sabotage their ship?"

"Voyager is going to have to come out of that plasma field sooner or later. I'd like to think that the Libertarians will be gone before they do, but we should be prepared for every circumstance. If the Libertarians decide to stick around I want to give Voyager as much of an edge as we can." She placed a hand on his leg. "You didn't think I was just going to sit quietly in their brig did you?"

"No - no - sitting quietly is the last thing I would expect you to do." He leaned forward and planted a kiss on her forehead. "At least I won't be bored."

A tone from the control panel caught their attention. Checking it Tsoai said, "That didn't take long. They've got a sensor lock on us. We'll be in tractor beam range in a few minutes."

"Want to hear my plan?"

"I'm all ears." .

********************

Navigating a field of plasma storms is a bit like playing in a thunderstorm. It's not the safest thing to do, but chances are you won't get hurt. In a ship as small and maneuverable as Voyager you have about a 99 percent chance of success. It's that last little percent that will kill you. Captain Janeway had invaded B'Elanna's domain in engineering to help her get the warp engines back on line. There was no warning when the plasma burst hit the warp engine field grill, traveled through the electrical conduits overloading the surge protection system and erupted from the console in front of her No warning and no time to react. The surge of electricity was visible, a white flash which enveloped the Captain and left her in a crumpled heap on the ground, the front of her uniform burned black. They could pass through a thousand more plasma storms and that particular sequence of events would never again be repeated. .

********************

Chakotay had the bridge. And as much as he wanted to be in sick bay he knew his place was on the bridge. He left only long enough to receive the Doctor's report in the Captain's ready room.

"The damage to the Captain's heart is irreparable," stated the Doctor. "She is being kept alive by an external circulatory processor."

"How long can she remain on the ECP?" asked Chakotay.

"Indefinitely."

"How long will it take you to construct an artificial heart?"

"Commander," said the Doctor, "I have the knowledge to construct an artificial heart, but not the technology. Voyager's medical supplies do not include the components for an artificial heart and such components are too complex to be replicated."

"You're telling me that she's going to have to stay hooked to the ECP?"

"We may encounter another race that has artificial organ technology," said the Doctor. "But until that time the Captain must remain connected to the ECP if she is to survive."

The thought of his Captain chained to that damned machine for the rest of her life was too depressing a thought for Chakotay to bear. ECP technology had come a long way. She would have limited mobility. She could move about the ship at least, but always dragging that ball and chain with her.

"Commander," said the Doctor, "we do have one another option. There is nothing wrong with the heart in the Captain's double. We still have the orchid responsible for the merger of Tuvok and Neelix. If the Captain's double were willing to merge I could remove the Captain's heart first and the healthy heart would take over."

"Is the Captain conscious?"

"No."

'My decision then', he thought. His thoughts went back to the last time Voyager had encountered a similar situation. Another plasma field, a double Voyager. The captain had been willing to sacrifice one version of herself so the other might live. She'd do it again. The only problem now was retrieving the doubles. .

********************

"I demand to see Minister Kando immediately." Despite her petite stature she could be an imposing woman. Judging by the way she was barking orders to the Libertarian crew one would have a difficult time determining exactly who was the prisoner here. Tsoai and Kathryn were in the docking bay of the Libertarian vessel surrounded by no fewer than a dozen guards with weapons drawn. "Where is Minister Kando. Take me to him now." There was enough authority in her voice to cause the unfortunate guards to cast looks of doubt at one another. Tsoai decided that this was probably not what Captain Janeway had in mind when she instructed them to keep a 'low profile'. It hadn't escaped his notice that since they launched the escape pod Janeway's double had completely disregarded every order they'd been given.

Kando entered the docking bay and instantly became the target of Kathryn's outburst. "Where is the rest of my crew?" she demanded.

Kando was taken aback, "Yours was the only escape pod we detected."

"We launched more than a dozen escape pods. I want to know where you're holding my crew and I demand that they all receive proper medical attention." Kathryn was pleased with her performance.

"Captain," said Kando. "No other escape pods came out of the plasma field." He was visibly shaken. "We detected an explosion within the plasma field and shortly thereafter found your escape pod."

She turned to Tsoai and spoke quietly. "The other pods must have been destroyed in the plasma field." He nodded, not quite confident enough in his own acting ability to respond verbally. Turning back to Kando she gave him the best look of disgust that she could muster, "Are your political goals so noble that they warrant the murder of 150 innocent lives."

"No, Captain. It was never our intention for your crew to be lost. We're not murderers. We would have delivered your crew to the Escondian government. All we wanted was Voyager."

"Did you think we would just roll over and give you our ship?" she asked.

"We didn't think you would make a suicide run through plasma storms!" Kando was exasperated. "Captain, we'll go in to the plasma storms ourselves to look for survivors."

That was the last thing she wanted. Think fast! "That won't be necessary. No escape pod could survive in there for this long. I see no reason for your crew to take further risks. I think we've had enough death for one day." She hoped that she was sounding noble rather than panicked.

*****

Panic is exactly what was Lieutenant Carey had been experiencing for the last eight hours in engineering. He was willing to accept Chakotay as first officer. He was willing to accept B'Elanna Torres as chief engineer. He was willing to accept apologies after he was unjustly suspected in a conspiracy plot with the Kazon. He was not willing to see his Captain permanently disabled. "We've got shields at 40% and minimal weapons back on line," he shouted to Torres.

B'Elanna Torres hit her com badge, "Engineering to bridge. Carey just got us some shields and weapons running. We can give you up to warp five for at least an hour. After that I have no guarantees."

"That will have to do, B'Elanna," replied Chakotay.

Voyager was by far the superior ship. Had they not been so damaged by the mines before encountering the Libertarians the first time it would have been a one sided battle in Voyager's favor. Even so, Chakotay wasn't wild about the idea of launching a rescue mission with a crippled ship. But he saw no other choice. They had moved Voyager close enough to the edge of the plasma storms to run a scan and discover that there was no signal from the escape pod's tracking beacon. Searching for them was going to waste precious time. .

********************

Kando stood in the quarters that had been used as a holding cell for Kathryn and Tsoai. His face looked weary. "We have set a course for an unmanned communications relay station. We'll drop you off tomorrow and you will be able to send a distress signal. A rescue vessel from the Escondian home world will be sent to retrieve you. So you see, Captain, we are not barbarians. Had you been less - impulsive - your entire crew would have been spared."

"Excuse me sir," a breathless officer appeared at the door.

"What is it?" asked Kando.

"The ship - Voyager - we have it on long range sensors. It just emerged from the plasma field."

Kathryn and Tsoai looked each other. Already? It had been less than twelve hours. This certainly threw off their timing. Kando was furious, all of his angst for nothing. "You would abandon your own ship? What kind of Captain leaves her ship?" He pushed a communications panel on the wall, "Helm - set a course to intercept Voyager. Maximum speed." Turning back to Kathryn he said, "I don't know what you thought you could accomplish by this deception, but this time your ship will not escape." With that he turned on his heels and left the room.

"What are they doing?" exclaimed Tsoai. "They couldn't have finished the repairs yet."

"I don't know, but we're going to have to work fast," Kathryn replied. She moved to the communications panel on the wall and removed the cover. "This should work ..." she muttered. As she pulled out wires sparks flew from the panel. She then removed a pip from the collar of her jump suit and gently popped open the back to reveal a small power cell.

"Hey, is that standard for captain's pips?" asked Tsoai.

"Sure - you didn't know?" she smiled. She pointed at the exposed communications panel, "Pull out as much wire as you can and connect it together." They worked quickly, pulling out lengths of wire, stripping on the protective covering with their teeth and connecting the ends. When they had one strip about three meters long she removed power supply from the communications panel, attatched the wires and jammed it next to the door of the quarters. They backed away from the door as far as the length of wire would allow. Tosia turned over a small table and they took cover behind it. Holding the other end of the wire in one hand and the pip in other she asked "Are you ready?" He nodded. The instant she touched the wire to the power cell in her pip the power supply exploded, knocking a small hole in the bottom of the door. Tsoai pulled a blanket off of the bed to protect his hands and grabbing the jagged edges of the hole pulled the door open.

"Where to now - Captain?" he asked. She smiled. It was his way of saying she'd earned the title again. They ran down the nearest hall, hopefully in the direction of engineering. Like the Maquis ship, this rebel vessel was grossly under-staffed. So far they'd encountered no resistance. Tsoai stopped her with a hand to her elbow when they passed an access tube.

"Let's try this," he said pulling the grate off of the panel.

"Why?"

"All access tubes lead to engineering." It sounded plausible. She followed him into the tube. They replaced the grate seconds before two guards turned down the hall.

********************

"Commander, the Libertarian vessel will intercept us in 30 seconds," reported Tuvok.

"Harry - are they on board?" asked Chakotay.

"I'm scanning now, sir. Yes, I have two human life signs."

"Transporter room - keep a lock on those life signs," ordered Chakotay.

"Acknowledged."

"Mr. Kim, are they responding to our hails?"

"No sir."

"Lieutenant Tuvok, target their shield generators and hit them with everything we have," said Chakotay.

"Yes sir"

Voyager let loose with a barrage of phaser fire and two photon torpedoes. They still had to be stingy with the photons. The Libertarian response was immediate and Voyager shuddered under the impact of their weapons fire.

"Shields are at 38%" reported Kim.

"Tuvok, how are we doing? Who's going to lose shields first?"

"At this point it cannot be determined. We may lose shields simultaneously," the Vulcan reported.

"Mutual assured destruction," Chakotay muttered under his breath.

"Commander, the Libertarians' shields are down," Tuvok reported it as calmly as he would have reported the weather on an M Class planet.

"Target their weapons systems! As soon as their weapons are off line drop shields and initiate transport," ordered Chakotay. "What happened to their shields?" He asked no one in particular.

********************

Tsoai stood over the body of an unconscious crewman in the engineering room of the Libertarian vessel. Kathryn was at his side. The limp body of another crewman was slumped against the far wall. Kathryn and Tsoai held the weapons of these crewmen in their hands and inspected the damage they'd inflicted. Control panels were twisted and smoking, wires hung loose from holes in the wall. Direct phaser fire is a crude, but effective, method of sabotage. They didn't have too much time to appreciate their handiwork. Three guards burst through the door with weapons firing. Tsoai lunged on top of Kathryn, taking a hit in the leg. Kathryn crawled out from under him, with one hand she tried to pull him behind the large console which stood in the center of the room, the other hand was blindly firing her weapon in the direction of the guards. She glanced at the guards long enough to see a fourth one enter the room with a disrupter rifle in his hands. There was nothing that could protect them from that. The guard took aim with his rifle. Tsoai looked up at Kathryn, as their eyes met she disappeared in a flash of light.

********************
"We have one of them, sir," came the report from the transporter room. "We lost the lock on the other. I'm trying to re-initiate." There was a pause that seemed to last forever. "Sir, I'm not picking up any more human life signs - he's just gone."

"*He's* gone? Then you have *her*?"

"Yes sir, she's fine."

Chakotay slumped into the Captain's chair in relief. "Mr. Paris - get us out of here."

********************

Captain Kathryn Janeway was recovering in her quarters. She had been conscious when her double had been brought in to sick bay and assessed of the situation. She had clearly heard the double's response to the doctor's suggestion that they merge: "Do it. Do it now." And the double again became a part of Captain Kathryn Janeway. Briefly separated and now joined. Just as her memories had become their memories, now their memories were her memories. 'Weird may be part of the job' she thought to herself, 'but this is a bit much even for a Starfleet Officer.'

She knew it was him as soon as she heard the tone at her door. She didn't even rise from the couch.

"Come in, Chakotay."

"So, you're psychic now?" he asked entering the room.

"Not psychic." She placed a finger on her temple. "But it is a little crowded in here. How are you doing?"

"I miss him." He sat beside her.

They sat for a moment in silence. "I miss him, too," she said. Now tucked nicely in to her own thoughts were memories of the time that Kathryn had spent with Tsoai. "I'm sorry, Chakotay. I know you thought of him as a brother."

"It was nice to be with someone who understood me so well. Very relaxing."

"You two got along well together. Better than she and I. Do you know she blatantly disobeyed direct orders?"

Chakotay laughed, "You'll have to put yourself on report." He draped his arm across the back of the couch.

"You know, I can't even separate us any more. There is no division between *me* and *her*. It's very difficult to describe, but it's as though I've been two places at once. All of those experiences are now mine - or ours - I don't know." She gave up trying to explain how she felt. Technology, and its side effects, had again outpaced the human capacity for understanding. Just as travel at warp speed is best understood when explained in linear terms of physical distance covered in a specific time (when in fact it has more to do with to do with the manipulation of time and space), it was still easier for Janeway to still think of her two 'selves' as distinct individuals.

"This will be a great story for you to share with the other admirals when we get home," Chakotay said.

"*If* we get home," she said, and smiled at Chakotay's raised eyebrows. "I think I've been focused too much on our destination. Maybe it's time I started looking at our journey as an end in and of itself. Rather than think about what we left behind, or what might be waiting for us when we return, we should make the most of what we have here." She shook her head. "No - I'm talking to myself here. I should make the most of what *I* have here." She put her arm across the back of the couch, resting in on top of Chakotay's.

"You mean what you have here in the Delta quadrant? Exploring strange new worlds, seeking out new lives and civilizations?" he asked.

"Boldly going....," her hand tightened on his arm. "That too," she smiled.

Chakotay wasn't sure exactly what had transpired between their doubles and he wondered briefly if he owed Tsoai a debt of gratitude. Something certainly had encouraged her to continue taking their relationship further beyond command structure. 'This is a nice beginning', he thought. But just a beginning. He didn't know where it would take them, but he didn't need to know. After all, the beauty is in the process.

-finis


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