SMART Operations

Welcome to SMART Oparations, run solely for our love of SMARTIES, because as you all know - only SMARTIES have the answer!!!!!!!!!

Smarties contain sensitive information - the answer to the Ultimate Question

They must be handled with care and caution.
But their usefulness is undeniable. Smarties, serve as intergalactic companions and can even prove life saving. See below for details.

Eat them when you are bored in Physics - they really do liven up even the most tedious Physics lessons in galactic history. Just observe those pretty colours and the smooth chocolately taste. mmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Play games with the smarties themselves - in SMART Operator style - See how long the smarties last before they melt in your mouth. It has been proven so far that Buzzgirl has harder working enzymes than DanaK do - seeing as she always loses. Looser!!!!!!!!!
When you are especially bored - play countdown with the smartie lids - it is really highly enjoyable!!!! The best word that we have come up with during Physics - is DIODE - Isn't that just amazing?????????? hmmmm well no.

Feed smarties to patients (Well the patients are rubbers (erasers) that Buzz and DanaK operate on during particularly boring lessons (NEVER CHEMISTRY THOUGH!!!!) So far we have tried to do a smartiectomy - but unfortunately - the result was unsuccessful. We will endeavour to pursue this critical transplant though.

Operating tips from Buzz

For any budding smartieoligist wannabes out there, we say practice. The beauty of this skill is that you can practice operations over and over again, without risking the lives of innocent people. (The lives of the innocent erasers don't really count but it is best to use a rubber that doesn't really rub out all that well) You will need.....

An operating table (a pencil case is just as effective at a fraction of the cost. Don't forget to sterilise it first!
Instruments, yes it is always relaxing for the patient if they can hear their fave tunes whilst having their insides stuffed with smartie fragments.
Operating insrtuments, failing everything else, a compass is always handy.
Bandages are good way to stop the flow of smarties, if not, use paper instead.

Case file #5991
Unexplained phenomena of the imploding snack machine. Report by Dana K Scully

This disasterous event took place during first month of 1998 in the Hulme Grammar School for Girls, located in the Oldham area.
This phenomenon is as yet unexplained. Agent Mulder believes that it was cause by some natural phenomenon, due to the reflection of light in previously abandoned corridor igniting a fuse on top of a certain (unnamed) maths teacher's head. We know that she indeed was present at the location of the incident. I on the other hand believe this incident to be an act of terrorism and the instigators to be within the school body, it was an act of rebellion against the cafeteria staff for confiscating dinner cards without mercy.
The end result - a tortuous week without smarties. This inhumane act will not go unpunished. Agent Mulder and I will endeavour to solve this case

S ooM ooooA ooooooR ooooooooT ooooooooooI ooooooooooooE ooooooooooooooSMARTIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:o)
GET your own free Web-Page