THINGS TO PONDER

1) Why do you park in a driveway and drive in a parkway?

2) Why do you have a hot-water heater when you don't need to heat hot water?

3) Why is an orange an orange and an apple not a red?

4) Why is a pear called a pear when there is only one?

5) What do they pack styrofoam in?

6) Why did God give men nipples?

7) If buttered toast always lands butter-side up, and a cat always lands on

its feet. What would happen if you tied a piece of buttered toast on the

back of a cat?

8) Is grass really greener on the other side?

9) Do boxer shorts box?

10) Why do you wear a pair of panties and only one bra?

11) If Corn Oil comes from Corn, what does Baby Oil come from?

12) If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do you get Teflon to stick to a pan?

13) Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink

and drive?

14) Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

15) Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

16) Why are there floatation devices under plane seats instead of

parachutes?

17) Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited

there?

18) Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mine?

19) Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

20) How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work?

21) If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on

the doors?

22) If a cow laughs, does milk come out it's nose?

23) If you are driving at the speed of light and you turn on you headlights,

what happens?

24) You know how most packages say "Open here." What is the protocol if the

package says, "Open somewhere else?"

25) Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

26) Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a

shipment , but when you transport something by ship it's called cargo?

27) You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes,

why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

28) Why is it that when you are driving and looking for an address, you turn

the radio down?

29) Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

30) Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

31) What does Geranimo say when he jumps out of a plane?

32) If fire fighters fight fire, and crime fighters fight crime, what do

freedom fighters fight?

33) Why ask why? Try Bud dry. Then again, if Bud's made from water, how can

it be dry?

34) Why is there a Permanent Press setting on an iron if it does not work?

35) Why is keyboard called a keyboard if it only has little buttons?

36) Do you think the Assassination Museum was created after JFK's

assassination?

37) If pot grows naturally, and we outlaw pot (nature), are we outlawing

God?

38) Does miniature golf enhance a drug trip?

39) When an elevator is illegally overloaded with passengers, who is

criminally responsible?

40) Why do cornflakes and Sugar Frosted Flakes have the same number of

calorie s per serving?

41) How do they unclog mail chutes in skyscrapers?

42) Why are US elections held on Tuesdays?

43) Why do women wear such uncomfortable shoes?

44) Which fruits are in Juicy Fruit gum?

45) Does your chewing gum lose its flavor on the bed post overnight?

46) Why can't you find fresh sardines in a fish market?

47) Why aren't there seat belts in buses and taxicabs?

48) Why does rootbeer taste flatter than any other colas?

49) Why do other people hear our voices different than we do?

50) If trailer parks didn't exist, would tornadoes exist?

51) Where do they get that awful music for ice skating?

52) Why does X stand for a kiss?

53) Why does O stand for a hug?

54) Why is saffron so expensive?

55) What is the purpose of the red string on Band-Aid brand adhesive

packages ?

56) Why did Nabisco eliminate the red string on the wrappers of its Saltine

two and four packs?

57) Why do Wintergreen Life Savers sparkle in the dark?

58) What's the funny beep on the radio just before the network news?

59) Why do we itch?

60) Why do the minute hands on school clocks always click backward before

advancing?

61) What causes holes in Swiss cheese?

62) How was the order of the alphabet determined?

63) Why don't penguins in the Antarctic ever get frostbite?

64) Why do we tie shoes on the back of newlyweds' cars?

65) How does Kraft get the five ounces into every slice of American Singles?

66) Why don't we get goosebumps on our faces?

67) What is the purpose of the little ball on top of the flag pole?

68) Why is Jack a nickname for John?

69) Why do Curad bandages sparkle when you open them?

70) Why do your feet swell on an airplane?

71) Why do doughnuts have holes?

72) How do they get the cream in the twinkie?

73) Why do some ranchers put old boots on fenceposts?

74) Why do bananas grow upward and all other fruits grow downward?

75) Do toilet seats really protect us against anything?

76) Why do men's bicycles have crossbars?

77) Why are most homes white?

78) Why do old women dye their hair blue?

79) Why do old men wear their pants higher than younger men?

80) Why are cows milked from the right side?

81) Why are the toilet flush handles on the left side?

82) Why does a soda taste better in a small bottle than in a large bottle or

can?

83) Why do firehouses have dalmatians?

84) Why is 40% called 80 proof?

85) Why does unscented hairspray smell?

86) Why can't we make newspapers that don't smudge?

87) Why do we have to DRY clean raincoats?

88) Why do you often see a shoe lying on the side of the street?

89) Why are there more brown M&M''s than any other color?

90) Why is yawning contagious?

91) Where do swear words come from?

92) Why are movie theaters always so cold?

93) Why is everything in Texas so big?

94) Why are school buses painted yellow?

95) Where does the lost sock in the washers and dryers go?

96) Why are jeans so hard to fit into?

97) Why is a black light not black?

98) Why does glass eventually get thicker towards the bottom?

99) If taught, do gorillas really understand sign language?

100) Why do brown eyes see better in the sun than blue eyes?

101) Why do scars never go away?

102) Who killed JFK?

103) How does the Cheshire cat only show his smile?

104) What did Robinson Caruso do with Friday on Saturday night?

105) Why don't we get dizzy from the world spinning so fast?

106) Why is it called a Ceasar's salad, did he invent it?

107) How many licks does it really take to get to the center of a Tootsie

pop?

108) Who really took a bite out of the Apple logo?

109) How can someone walk up a hill both ways through 32 feet of snow butt

naked?

110) Why is it called football when you really don't use your feet at all?

111) How does one actually zip their lip?

112) Can your face actually freeze while making ugly faces?

113) Why is brassiere singular and panties plural?