I can't think of anything I want to yell about now. If you have any ideas mail them to me.
1.Why dont shelled peanuts have shells? If you are clothed you have clothes.
They should be unshelled peanuts. I ask you " where are the bones in boned
chicken??"
2. I've grown weary of reading about clouds in a book. Every time there is an
outdoor scene, an open window, or even a door slightly ajar. The author
feels the need to describe the clouds. Why not just say " The clouds hung in
the air like silver lined, loosely formed, gorilla turds" and be done with
it.
3. " 3 things a king never has to say." (1)- Can i play too? (2)- Hey
guys wait for me! (3)- I never seem to get laid.
4. I often hear otherwise intelligent people complaining about drivers who
slow down when driving past accidents. They curse them and call them
rubberneckers. I dont understand this at all. I am never in so big of a
hurry that i cant stop and watch someone elses suffering. I WANT to see some
guy who's neck is part of his gas tank. And if i cant see enough from my
particular vantage point? Ill ask the cop to bring the bady closer.
" Say officer, could you bring that twisted chap over here a little closer?"
5. These Same idiots who complain about rubberneckers also misuse the word
"forte". It means strong point or speciality and it is NOT pronounced
"for-tay". It is pronounced "fort". Look it up. If you tell me that
"for-tay" is listed as the second preference then i tell you there is a
reason why it's second. ITS NOT FIRST!!
6. Here is one you here from the true low-life-pond-scum. "THE PROOF IS IN
THE PUDDING." No dumbass, the rice and the raisins are in the pudding.
Idiots...
7. There is no such word as " Kudo". KUDOS is a singular noun meaning
praise, and it is pronounced
kyoo-dose. So please stop telling me " So ans SO picked up another Kudo
today."
8. The phrase " thats the oldest trick in the book" How the hell did this
get started?? What book? Prostitutes have books of tricks. Maybe thats what
this is all about.....
9. "One thing leads to another" NOT ALWAYS sometimes one thing leads to the
same thing. Ask an addict.
10. "You get what you pay for" Only a naive person would believe this. Have
you been shopping lately??
11. " Two wrongs dont make a right" Well it just so happens that 2 wrongs do
make a right. The whole thing goes up exponentially. 2 wrongs make one
right- 4 wrongs make 2 rights- 16 wrongs make 3 rights- and 256 wrongs make
4 rights. It seems to me that anyone stringing together 256 right needs
counseling not mathemeatics.
12. Without a doubt this is the dumbest saying ever " What you dont know
wont hurt you." Why dont we just ask Abe Lincoln and John Kennedy about this
one.
13. Now im sorry if i offend anyone but i do not believe in politically
correct language. NATIVE AMERICANS this term is completely bullshit. First
of all they arent natives, they cam across the bering land bridge. Second do
i even have to say how big of an insult it is to call them americans!! We
come over, rape there women, steal their country, kill 20 or so million of
them and then name them after ourselves?? Jesus Christ.
African American is also a bullshit term. African american is not used to
mean people from africa who now live in america. You would think thats what
it means but it doesnt. It means BLACK PEOPLE. Do you know how i know?
People from egypt are white. They are from africa. If an egyptian comes
here, he could call himself an african american, but noone would respect
him. So This phrase means black people. Now Fat people are FAT. They are not
large, stout, chunky, hefty , or plump. They are not big boned- DINOSAURS
where big boned. They are not obeise either. That is a very specific medical
term. They are not heavy either. An air-craft carrier is heavy. It isnt fat.
Sorry but i prefer to look at things the way they are. Not the way some
peole wished they were.
14. Now i also dont understand having rules for wars. The object is to win
right? Then wars should be fought no holds barred.Why treat their wounded?
That takes your own resources. Your still trying to win right?? My doubts
abot rules for combat likewise extend to street fighting. Ive heard people
whine about someone throwing a "sucker punch". are you kidding?? A guy wants
to reduce your ass t a small bloody pile and he is gonna warn you before he
hits you? GET REAL!! Also i dont understand whats wrong with kicking someone
when they are down. Again, the object is to win right? Well if he gets up,
you might lose!! Therefore he must not get up. He NEEDS to be kicked! You
said you wanted to win right? Then stop f*ckin' around and win!
Okay one more- Why on god's green earth would a terrorist call the cops and
wanr them that he placed a bomb somewhere?? Do i even need to explain my
dismay at that one? But i fear my rules dont suit you so i go back to the
one thought that brought this up." You people shouldnt be fightin in the
first place."
AND NOW- My rules to live by!
1. Relax and take it easy. Dont get caught up with such nonsense as " doing
something with your life" It is a sure formula for dissapointment.
2. Whatever is your calling, try to do it just well enought to stay in the
middle third of the feild. Dont ask questions and keep your thought too
yourself. Remeber the squeky wheel is the first to be replaced..
3.Dont fall for that superstitious nonsense about treating people the way
you want to be treated. It is the sign of a weak mind.
4. Some people are perfect. If your not then something is wrong.
Now i dont think stephen told you enough about me. When i was younger i was
such a loner i had an imaginary friend who kept following me around. But i
said " Screw him!" I got no time for peole like that. I volunteered for
being silly as soon as i found it was an option. My teacher told me "
Phillip, you can either take responsibility and learn this material or you
can continue to act silly." thats all i needed to hear
If you would like to be a guest rambler then you can mail me your rant and I'll rate it and post it.
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