HIGH-TEC - HARD-TEC (It's the same thing)
September, 1996
By Elizabeta

The World Wide Web.
Online.
The Internet.

Exactly what are these things?
I don't really know.
Modern Technology brings
Both fascinating stuff and a lot of woes.

It sometimes leads to
Computer viruses, bombs and hackers.
Oh, the things some people do.
The "Technical Consultant" who wants your password is really an attacker
To your account.

But with the problems and disasters
Come good things, too.
Online is something I can't master
Since they "upgraded" everything I knew.

There are places that you can
Talk to someone in another land.
Don't ask me how.
I only know someone is emailing me now.

What does IM mean anyway?
They call this online thing easy.
But I've been trying to respond to this "IM" for a day
And the darn thing is starting to make me queasy!

High-Tec, Hard-Tec, it's the same
To me.
People ask me for my screen name
But I have no clue to whatever it may be.
(maybe "Low-Tec Redneck"???)

If someone told me to describe online in one word
The word would would be, um, inappropriate.
But
Instead I'll say, "Don't listen to the online commercials. It's harder than what you've heard."

I'll go now as soon as quit this program.
I'll find a way, the Low-Tec genius that I am.
As soon as I press this here button, everything will be all right.
That's what it says in the owners manual I've been reading all night.
(pressing button)

Uh, what does it mean when
Smoke comes out of the top of the computer?
Oh, well. At least my had-once-been
A rocket scientist computer repairman
Doesn't know how I messed
Up.
But I did try my best.
(To figure things out, I mean)

I know what to do!
I'll go to my friend's house and learn on her PC.
But I wish I knew
Why she guards her computer with a riffle whenever she sees me.

I'll end this poem now with a smile.
I'll put online in a while.
(That is, if I can figure out the difference between downloading a file and unloading a wagon)
I'll save this and that will be the end. (That's for sure)
(Pressing button and the computer blows up this time)
OOPS . . .
Here I go again.

The End of this Poem
And of my computer.

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