Cid's Worst Nightmare
[Cid's house]
Shera: Captain, your tea is ready.
Cid: Thanks. I am always in a good mood before [turns on tv] the--
T.v: New show, Pokemon!
Cid: @!)(*@!#$!!! Wrong channel! [presses channel 28, nothing changes] What
the $(#&%(#&%?
T.V: Now the smelly old Dukes of Hazzard have been canceled.
Cid: [Looks with his chin hanging] [Drops on his knees with his hands on the
sides of his head] NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! DEAR GOD
NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! [thinks] Shera, get the gun...
Shera: Sorry, Captain. I can't let you go on another killing spree.
Cid: #)(%#(%*#!!!!!
Shera: You can quietly sit and watch Pokemon or I could make you some more
tea.
Cid: Watch Pokemon?! (#@*%#%* NO!!
[5 minutes later]
Cid: [looking closely at the t.v] DAMN YOU TEAM ROCKET!! GIVE BACK PIKACHU!!
[Throws a beer can at a Jessy and James close up] YOU #%*@#&%
#))(#$*()#*$()#$@S!!! DIE!!
[Cloud, Vincent, Barret and Marlene walk in]
Barret: Cid, Marlene was wondering she could watch her favorite show or your
t.v.
Cid: %(*#(*%# NO!
Barret: Told you hon. You can't see pokemon since the Dukes of Hazzard is on.
Cid: THAT PIECE OF ($#*(#$!!!! COME HERE! I'M WATCHING MY NEW FAVORITE SHOW!
POKEMON!! [All look at Cid strangley]
Cloud: [to everyone but Cid] He's crazy! [To Cid] We're taking you to the
[thinks] hotel with the Pokemon padded walls.
Cid: ???
Cloud: You'll get Pikachu's autograph-- [A blur runs by Cloud]
Cid: [from outside] WHAT THE #)($?*$&*#(@$#@)()(#&$ ARE YOU #)@*#)(*$)(#@$*
WAITING FOR?! LET'S GO!!!
[Sephiroth's house]
Sephiroth: [watching T.v] POKEMON! GOTTA CATCH EM ALL!!! POKEMON!!
[jenova comes in]
Jenova: Are you watching your favorite show about the boys in the fast car?
Sephiroth: It was cancelled. I'm watching that show that gave all the sezures.
Jenova: Okay have-- SEZURES?! [Grabs Sephiroth by the ear] THAT SHOW WILL
HURT YOU!!! Come on! We're going to kill the people on that show!
Sephiroth: But mom! Ash was about to use Bulbasuar to get pikachu back!
Jenova: I don't care! This is worse than the time you we're playing Foozeball
behind my back!
Sephiroth: Okay... [Walks off[ [Runs back to the T.V]
Jenova: Get back here!
Sephiroth: Aw... [Walks off]
[The mental hospital-- err place were Cid can get Pikachu's autograph]
Cid: WHERE THE (#$(#*(*#%& IS PIKACHU?!
Cloud: Right in there. [Slams the door behind Cid] Now he's safe in the room
with the padded walls.
Cid: WHAT THE
(*%)($#)#(*&%)($#)(#&%)(#&%(@)&%##_@($!@*$!(#%@&!@($!)$_+(%+_#%_%+@(%+_#!%!_$(
%+_#@)$+@#*%#@_+)_+*_#@~($+#@%)_@*#+@($#*%+(@!!)#@!*$_@($_!##()(@*!#+@!#)(*@$)
@($()@&$$*)(@$????!!!!! [Sees a t.v] YES! [Turns on the t.v] YES! POKEMON!
[Sees Sephiroth and Jenova sluaghtering all the characters] NNNOOOOO!!!!!
T.V: We interupt this program for the Dukes Of Hazzard since the cast of
pokemon is now dead.
Cid: THAT PIECE OF )%*)#(@%*()#@%*)(!!!!
[1 second later]
Cid: YES! Damn, that car is fast!
[Sephiroth's House]
{sephiroth is watching the dukes of hazzard]
Sephiroth: YAY! It's back on!
Jenova: Damn, that car IS fast. [Eats some popcorn]
And they watched the Duke Happily ever after.... at least I think they did.
THE END!
Thank God Cid's back to normal (for Cid). Head back?