Trouble in Hazzard County
[Cloud's house]
[Cid is watching the dukes of hazzard while everyone trys to change the
channel]
Cloud: [Gets his sword] Cid you will die unless you change the channel!
Cid: Oh Bodyguard who likes the dukes as much a s me! [Sephiroth walks in]
Sephiroth: Is there a problem here?
Cloud: [Wets his pants] AAAHHH!!! {Hides]
Cid: Not anymore. Want to wathc the dukes?
Sephiroth: [Opens a can of beer and a sits next Cid] Sure.
T.V: This is the episode that was never aired.
Cid: YES! DUKES OF HAZZARD BLOOPERS!
T.V: This was the episode that ended the Dukes of Hazzard and started the
show Matlock.
Sephiroth: YES! [Chants] MATLOCK! MATLOCK!
T.V: This is th Dukes of Hazzard: Trouble in Hazzard County.
[Cid and Sephroth get close to the T.v]
Bo: Luke, whats that noise? [electrical zapping is heard] AGH! [Bo and Luke
fall to the ground dead and bleeding]
Cid; [GASP]
#*%@)(#*%%#(#*%)(#*%(#%*#%&(*#%(*#%(#@%&(*#(*#&$(#$&(*#&$(*#$&(*#&$(*#&$*(?$^
*?$*?^%*?^%#^%*#&%^*?%*?&%*(#@^$*#^$?^$*?#$&*#$N'
NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!
[Sephiroth faints while Cloud and his friends cheer]
[More of the episode]
Matlock: I am here to prove that Boss Hogg had Bo and Luke Hazzard
electricuted to death!
Cid: WE HAVE TO SAVE THEM!
Sephiroth: [Gets up] You mean?
Cid: YES! THE TRANS DIMENSIONAL PROTAL! [Both run out to go to Hazzard county]
Cloud: The T.V's ours! [Is suddenly impaled by a sword] OW! DAMMIT!
Sephiroth: HA HA!!
[The portal]
Kefka: {runs out with torn clothes and has a black eye] I JUST GOT OUT OF THE
PROTAL! WHEN I HIT THE BOTTOM I WAS SENT TO TTHIS STRAGNE PLACE WHERE I WAS A
KID IN AN ORANGE COAT AND MY NAMES WAS KENNY!!!!!!!! [Note: You have to have
seen South Park to have gotten that]
Sephiroth; SHUT UP! We have to save the dukes!
Kefka: But I need a doctor- the dukes are in trouble?! )$)($ MY HEALTH! LET'S
GO!! [All run into the portal]
[Meanwhile....]
Boss Hogg: So this ecltric hamter thing will kill off the dukes?
Sheriff I forgot his name: Yes sir, Boss Hogg!
Hogg: Good.
[The Duke's House]
Cid: YOU GUYS ARE IN $_#^%)(#*%)(#)#(*#)(@ TROUBLE! BOSS HOGG IS GONNA KILL
YOU ALL!!!
Bo and Luke: WHAT?!!
Cid: COme with us! [All run to the portal when Pikachu pops out]
Pikachu: [Ready kill them all] Pika-- [Cid shoves his spear us pikachu's @$$]
PIKACHU! PIKA PI PI PIKA CHU!!! [Jumps around hold it's @$$ in pain] [Cid and
the dukes enter the portal] PIKA! [Jumps in after them]
[Cloud's House]
[Cid runs in with the dukes of Hazzard, Sephiroth and a dying Kefka]
Cloud: What the...?
Tifa: It can't be...
Aeris: NOOOO!!! IT'S THE DUKES OF HAZZARD!!
All: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
Sephiroth: [Slames the door][ Pikachu's coming!!
Cloud: Pikachu?! That wussy little hamster! You wusses! [Goes outside to kill
pikachu]
Pikachu: PIKACHU!!! [Zapping is heard]
Cloud: ZZZZZZZZZZWWWWAAAA!!!!! [Falls down, sizzling, smoking and babbling
like an idiot]
Sephiroth: HA HA!
Pikachu: [Sees the Dukes] PIKA-- [Sephiroth runs in and impales pikachu]
chuu.... [dies, WWWWOOOOO-HHHHHHOOOOO!!!!!!!!]
Sephiroth: The evil of Pikachu has been vanquished! Now he will never give
sezures again!
Cid: Sezures?
Sephiroth: He gave over 700 Japanese kids sezures!
Cid: WHAT?! [Kicks pikachu's body around] YOU $&%A(*$&*#$*(#$*(#&%(*#@&%
(909) 337-9844 )(?(&%#(*&%#&%#*&%*#%&*#%&*#&% 1-800-722-7337
#%(#(^%*(#%#%&(#&%(#&%)(#&%#)(&%)(#&%#&%)#&%)(&%)#%#)%&)(#%&(#&%)(#&%(#%(#%&)(
% 1-900-I-hate-yuffie (*$)(#*$(#*$(#*$)(#*$)(#*$)#*$)(#*$()#*(#$#)(*$(#$()*#
()#%(*#&%*#&%*(#%#&%#%?%&*#&%#@&%#)(%&)#%&)##$#*$#$*#$**#*$#$*#)$!!!!!!!!!
PICKING ON LITTLE KIDS!! [Plays soccer with pikachu's corpse] DIE DIE!!
DDDDDIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! [Tosses pikachu's body in the river]
Sephiroth: Cool!
Kefka: need doctor.... [dies]
Cloud: CAFKA!!!
Spehiroth: That's Kefka!
Cloud: I mean KEFKA!!!
The End
More fanfics with Cid + the Dukes!