Leaving Me Now
by Shirlz

He’s standing across from me, so close and yet so very far away. Invisible hands are pulling at me, trying to draw me towards him and at the same time holding me back. So I just stand here holding his gaze and wondering if it is possible to die from a broken heart.

She’s just staring at me and there is nothing I can do about it. I am like a spider caught in her web. I can see in her eyes that she can’t quite believe that I can do this to us. I wish she would understand that there is no alternative. I wish she would look away.

It seems true love is so rare
Seems all I’ve known is deceit
Your laughter fills the air
Once more I’m sensing defeat
And I suppose you’re leaving me now
I was so sure now I’m so full of doubt
And I suppose you’ll be leaving this place
Just like the smile you wiped from my face this time

If you’re going to go then just go. I can’t bear this just standing and looking. It’s like we’re waiting for the other to make the first move. A battle of wills. You wanted this; it was your idea. Go. Why won’t you look away? Do you think this is easy for me? Do you think I want to do this? I don’t. I want to sweep you into my arms, crush you to me and never let you go. But I can’t. I know that if I stay my desire for you will overwhelm me. Please understand I have to go to keep you safe.

I always gave my best
You’re memory serves you so badly
Some people kill for less
Yet I’d still die for you gladly
(So gladly)
But I suppose it’s my turn now
To play a scene that’s familiar somehow
I turn the page and you walk away
Not even love could bring you to stay this time
(Walk away, you don’t need me)

Why don’t you go? How much longer can we stand here and stare at each other? You made it perfectly clear that it was over between us. I feel as if my heart is stuck in my throat. I’m drowning under a tidal wave of emotions and if you don’t go soon I am going to fall apart before your eyes. Is that what you want? Do you want to watch my destruction? Look away. One of us has to look away. I can feel a pain in my chest where my dead heart lies, a stabbing pain. Can the dead die again? Because that’s what it feels like. You know I have to do this Baby. I can’t risk him being set free again.

Once more I’m learning in the depths of my despair
Your lies confirming true love is so rare
And I suppose it’s my turn now
There’s no more love only feelings of doubt
Gone with the hope your words have erased
Gone with the smile you wiped from my face

The smoke and noise have ceased to be, funny how being near you has that effect. It was the same at the Prom. You entered the gym and everything else just faded away. Damn you! It’s just you and me. No fire trucks, no people, no sirens. All I can see is you, and that’s the way it’s always been. You have always been the most important thing in my world, that’s why I am doing this. I know I am no good for you, I have to set you free.

Love is a ship we all have to steer
Through troubled times cross an ocean of tears
A midnight sea that swells from your eyes
Takes just one look to know I’m still mesmerised
But I suppose you’re leaving me now
I was so sure now I’m so full of doubt
I turn the page and you walk away
Not even love could bring you to stay this time

He’s going. He has turned away. No, don’t go. I don’t want you to go. We can work this out. Don’t leave me. I need you. I love you. I love you. I...love...you. I guess I have to be the strong one. I take one final look at you and then I turn and begin to walk away. The demon and the soul scream as one at the agony of being torn away from you. I love you.

Leaving me now
Leaving this place
I watch you walk away with an easy grace

The End

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