Alright, I'm going to do LaCroix some justice.. Cause Tiff's story only mentioned LaCroix.. I felt sorry for him... This is an answer to Mary and Tiff's challenge of Tracy/Screed fic containing a canary, a tattoo, and goose down feathers. These are two stories joined together in their early stages, I was originally writing the second one for a b-day present to myself (16 btw for all those curious :P), but I decided, oh what the hell.. I might as well right it into the challenge fic I was already writing. Thanks to Mary for writing the Screedspeak Let me say before I start.. I can't believe I'm doing this!! And P.S. this isn't really TS fic.. but it contains TS, I'm sorry.. I'm a LaCroix fan.. This story was written and about ready to send half an hour ago, but my comp crashed and took the rest of the story with it... So I can't complete the TS requirement of the challenge due to the mishap.. Torturing LaCroix... (01/01) Mary turned off the engine of the Ford Taurus in the garage of the Dark Perk Mansion. She followed Miranda's lead of hopping out of the car quickly with a smile on her face. They rounded the mansion to go in through the front door as they talked. "That movie should just be blasted back to where it came from, cause it ain't winning any Oscars here..." Miranda shook her head. Tiffiney nodded. "Terrible waist of millions of dollars... Millions of dollars that should be coming to me! If I made a movie, I would not rely on such a lame excuse of a plot." "Well," Mary began. "You know, you could see the director trying to make the plot better. But you could see no success..." Mary trailed off staring. "What...?" Miranda asked curiously. "What is *that*?" Mary asked pointing an accusing finger towards the dark garage. Tiff looked towards the garage to see what was going on to see a body being dragged by a bald headed man and a blonde woman.. "It's only the Hunchback of Notre Dame and his dearest beloved," Tiff shrugged. "Wait.. is that LaCroix?!" she gasped. Miranda mouthed the word: 'yes', but realized no sound came out as she stared in shock and horror. "Yes, it's LaCroix... OH my gosh! LaCroix! What are they doing to my LaCroix?!!!" "Ahem," Mary intervened. "*Our* LaCroix, and besides, we can't intervene in Tracy's matters.." "They have LaCroix!" Miranda exclaimed. "They are dragging a 2000 year old vampire across the floor of the garage, if that isn't screwed up, I don't know what is!!" Miranda began lunging for LaCroix when Mary pulled her back. "Let Tracy handle it.. come on.. I'll make you some hot cocoa.." Miranda sighed and turned around with Tiff and Mary to return to the Dark Perk mansion. The three stepped inside the mansion as they retreated to their rooms. Miranda passed by a new bird chirping in the hallway and smiled. "Hey lil' canary!" she called watching the canary chirp its sweet songs to the whole hallway. "Aren't you feeling a little lonely all alone out here?" she asked. The canary chirped back another response... "Hey Mir!" Mary called from the other end of the hallway, are you coming to the kitchen or what?" she asked. "Yeah, I'm coming! Do you know who left this cute little bird out there?" Miranda asked curiously. Mary approached the bird cage and the young DP. "Nope," Mary shrugged. "I don't, probably one of Tracy's little surprises for us," Mary grinned, tugging Mir by the arm to go to the kitchen. "You know... There are many reasons why LaCroix is soo hot!" Miranda exclaimed walking down the DP Mansion hallway with Mary. "Like I haven't noticed," Mary smirked rolling her eyes. "Hey gals!" Tracy greeted running up to the pair. "What are you talking about?" Mary gave a large grin to Miranda. "Plans," Mary smiled. "We're making plans to meet with someone for a special day." Tracy gave a perky smile to the two females. "Someone is waiting for you downstairs Mir..." Tracy smiled jogging off. Miranda shook her head. "She feels perky this morning. I thought she'd be tired from dragging.." "Shush!" Mary exclaimed. "If Tracy finds out we know about her, who knows what she's going to do to us?" Miranda nodded. "You're right, of course.." "Mir! Mary!" Tiff yelled running of the stairs like crazy. "You have to come down and see this!!" The three ladies ran down the stairs into the foyer to see an amazing spectacle. There on the couch, tied up and gagged was LaCroix goosedown feathers and all covering his entire body, he kept on spatting the disgusting feathers out of his mouth as he tried to speak. Only Hours Before... "She's gonna luv this!" Screed exclaimed as he watched Miklos pull up a chair. "Yeah," Tracy nodded as she watched a drugged LaCroix trying to keep concious. "Alright lovebirds, I've done the image as you asked. Now I need a message and the colours you want.. sign there, and there you two," Miklos Tracy signed her name eagerly in sky blue as Screed signed his name in a creamy white. "Put 'im in the Foyer will ya?" Screed asked walking out with his Baby Jane. Back to the Present... "Oh you poor baby!" the three simultaneously exclaimed. With a laugh, they began to help LaCroix with the feathers. "I can't get the rope!" Miranda exclaimed as Tiff tried to get the feathers off LaCroix's head. As Mary relieved the duct tape off of LaCroix's face he thanked Mary with a smile. "Perhaps, the reason why you cannot undo the rope, is because you aren't anywhere near it," he smiled. "Sorry LaCroix," she grinned. "It's my birthday.. Give me some time to adjust," she smiled. Tiff ripped the back of LaCroix's shirt opened. "Let's see what we have here..." "Hey! What did you do that for?" Mary asked coming about to see the back. Tiff only gave a slight giggle in response as she looked at LaCroix's bare back. Mary crumbled to her knees laughing her head off as Miranda looked over LaCroix's shoulder: Hey lil' dear May this sweet sixteen present last for many many centuries to come Baby Jane and Popeye Miranda collapsed into LaCroix's arms as she died laughing. "Oh my goodness! This is the best day ever!! Oh yeah!" "Tattoo, isn't it? It's a tattoo isn't it??!! Not again!!" LaCroix moaned. "Relax!" Miranda exclaimed running her finger along his back. "And tasting a black, yellow cream on her tongue. It's just cake frosting!" ~*End*~ HEHEHEHEHEHEHE BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ~*FIN*~ -- Miranda :) AC Tong :D specmir@home.com http://www.flarn.com/miranda/ RCAC 692 Air Canada Squadron