The Perfect Fairy Tale?

By: Forlay

Chapter One

"Um, Tobias? Are these our woods?" I asked, looking around.
 < No. Definitely not, > he answered, perching in a tree above me. < The trees, for example, are too big. I mean huge! I can't see the city anywhere. The only signs of civilization are a few log cabins. >
 I nearly laughed. There weren't log cabins anywhere near home, except in the ski resorts. But Tobias sounded too serious to be joking. So instead I asked, "Any sign of the others."
 
 "Then ask. Duh."
 A pause, then, < Yeah, it's them. Oh, crap! Guys! Get out of there! >
 "What?"
 < There's a group of big guys heading towards you with some nasty looking guns. >
 I was about to start morphing grizzly to try and help when I heard them. Gun shots. Really close gun shots. And the sound of men yelling, like they were watching the Super Bowl.
 I continued morphing. "Which way ark dak?" I asked as my mouth pushed out into the bear's snout.
 < Right behind you, reverse the morph. They didn't get hit. > Tobias added before I could ask. I reversed the morph just before four burly men with shaggy hair and large rifles found us.
 "What are you doing out here, girl?" One of the men asked me. "Don't you know there's a dangerous monster loose?"
 "Of course she doesn't," another man answered, leering at me in a way I didn't like. "She a girl. They don't know anything."
 "Shaddup," the first guy, obviously the leader of the group, said.
 It took all my will power, but I managed to ignore the second guy's remark and asked, "What monster are you talking about?"
 "Told you she wouldn't know anything," the second guy mumbled.
 The leader ignored him. "Why, the wolf, of course. He ate an old woman and her young granddaughter recently. Thankfully, they were rescued but the wolf survived."
 "So you're just going around trying to kill every wolf you see?" I asked, not believing a word I was hearing. Someone was insane here, me or them.
 "That's the King's orders."
 Tobias told me. I'd almost forgotten he was there. < They're looking for a place to demorph now. >
 "Pa, we should take her back to the village with us," another guy said. He was younger than the other three guys, he'd been almost hidden by their bulk. He didn't have a beard like them and had a smaller gun. He couldn't have been more than a year older than me. "She obviously doesn't know of the creature and is sure to catch her death here in that garb."
 The leader, the boy's father, grunted. "go. Take her to your mother."
 I hesitated when the boy motioned for me to follow him. < Go ahead, > Tobias said. < I'll tell the others then follow you. > I nodded slightly and followed the boy.

Chapter Two

"What were you doing that deep in the woods?" Guy, I hadn't learned his name so I had begun to think of him as 'Guy', asked.
 "Uh, I was traveling and lost the path."
 "How long have you been out?"
 "Not long. I only set out this morning." That was the truth. Sort of. It was late afternoon here, wherever 'here' was, but back home it was still morning.
 All the Animorphs had been standing in the woods one minute, myself having arrived late and just beginning to morph wolf while the others were already fully morphed, when suddenly I was in a totally different wood with Tobias.
 "You were planning on traveling in that garb? Odd traveling clothes. I'm sure Gretel will have some clothes more fitting for traveling."
 "Who's Gretel?"
 "My sister. Oh, by the way, I'm Hans. Well, Hansel, actually, but I prefer Hans."
 Okay, I was the insane one here. A wolf had eaten a grandmother and a girl, who had survived, and now I was going to Hansel and Gretel house? Would the Gingerbread Man come running past now?
 "You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"
 Ask a stupid question...
 I had to jump to the side of the dirt road to avoid being run over by the moving confection. Hans noticed my startled look and said apologetically, "The baker's wife makes one of them about once a week. She hasn't learned yet. There's our cottage just ahead."
 I couldn't believe four people managed to fit into that tiny cottage. It was maybe the size of my house's kitchen and dining room put together, but that's stretching it.
 Inside the cottage was extremely crowded. We walked right into the tiny kitchen. There was a lighted wood burning stove where bread was being baked, and a kettle of something that smelled nasty was hanging over the fire. Two women, one stout with silver hair held back in a loose braid, the other with long blond hair hanging down her back, were standing at a counter with their backs turned to us.
 "Mother?" Hans asked. The silver haired woman turned around. "Hansel! What are you doing back already? Did you kill the monster? Where's that good-for-nothing father of yours? And who's this poor thing? Gretel, go fetch this lass a decent set of clothes." The blond girl, a few years older than me, left the room quickly.
 "It's Hans, Mother," Hans said wearily, as if he'd reminded her thousands of times before.
 "I birthed you, Hansel, and shall call you Mud if I see fit. Now, where's that worthless father of yours?"
 "Still out hunting. We found this girl in the woods. I brought her straight here."
 "Glad to see you inherited my sense instead of your father's. Ah, Gretel, thank you." The woman took the stack of clothes from Gretel and handed them to me. "Go into my bed chamber to change, then come back out and we'll get some food into you."
 Still trying to recover from the shock of finding myself surrounded by fairy tale characters, I walked out of the kitchen, not really know where, or what exactly, the bed chamber was.
 The next room was a small sitting room, the back portion of which was curtained off. Cautiously, I pulled back the curtain revealing a tiny bed room. Bed chamber. Whatever.
 I walked in and closed the curtain behind me. I set the clothes on the lumpy bed and began separating the many articles. There was something that resembled a slip, a blouse, a skirt (that didn't match the blouse) an apron, and a scarf, presumable to cover my head like the ones Gretel and her mother had been wearing. There was no way I was going to wear all this, however. Hoping I wasn't breaking some major cultural taboo, I put the slip thing and scarf in a crudely carved closet, where the entire family's clothes were kept apparently, and once dressed, went back into the sitting room, where Hans' and Gretel's mother had set out a plate of food for me on the table. Hans and Gretel were there also, eating bread, looking enviously at the large plate of food I'd been given. Apparently, their mother was as bad as the story made her out to be.
 I took a seat and got a good look at the food. Hans and Gretel could have all of it, as far as I was concerned. Two strips of sad looking jerky, a seedy roll and a slice of bread. The bread was probably fairly fresh, but it looked kind of grayish. And the water was just nasty, there's no other way to describe it. Grotesque maybe? It was tinted slightly brown and had things I couldn't identify floating in it.
 I picked over the food, giving generously to Hans and Gretel. Once we'd finished off the food, I went outside to talk to Tobias and the others, promising Mother (that's what Hans' and Gretel's mother insisted I call her) I wouldn't go into the woods.
 < Hey, Rachel! > Tobias said from his perch in a nearby tree. < Nice dress. Although I don't think brown is your color. >
 "Oh shut up. Where are the others?"
 < Hiding out in the woods. You know, there are some extremely strange things going on here. >
 "What was your first clue? I'm staying with Hansel and Gretel and passed the Gingerbread Man on the way here."
 < That would explain the cabin made out of candy I saw on the way here. >
 "Have the other's seen anything weird?"
 < Not as far as I know, but I told them to keep on the lookout. >
 "FE FI FO FUM! I SMELL THE BLOOD OF AN ENGLISHMAN!"
 "What the...?"
 "Rachel! Back in the cabin now!" Gretel shouted at me from the doorway, saying more in that sentence than she had the entire day. "A giant comes!"
 "Why doesn't that surprise me?" I muttered. "Talk to you later, Tobias," I jogged back to the cabin.
 Mother and Hans were in the sitting room. Gretel took a look at them and sighed. I got the feeling she thought they were over reaction, but didn't want to fight with her mother, so she ushered me under the table as well.
 Once the giant had passed, leaving the tiny cottage intact, Mother went back to ordering Hans and Gretel around while I was told I could take a mat, located in the closet, and rest in her bed chamber. I wanted to go back outside, but was told that under no circumstances was I to go back out there. Something about the giant could return any moment. So I complied.
 I must have fallen asleep, for the next thing I knew after setting down the woven mat was Gretel bringing me a tray of food for dinner.
 "Stay awhile," I told her before she could leave. "I'm not all that hungry, you could have some of my food."
 "But Mother will be angry with me..." she protested.
 "Forget your mother," I told her. "You won't die if you're late this once."
 "Well, perhaps for a little while." She daintily sat down next to me.
 "Are you a witch?" she asked suddenly as we ate. I nearly choked on the bread I was trying to chew. "What?" I asked when I could talk.
 "I saw you talking to a bird when you were outside. And you came dressed in strange black garb, the witch's color."
 "No, I'm not a witch," I assured here. "I...I just get comfort in talking to animals."
 "Oh. Like Snow White."
 "Um. Yeah. I guess. What's she doing now?"
 "She's one of Prince Charming's wives."
 "Wives? Plural?"
 "Yes, the common folk aren't supposed to know, but I'm more observant than most," she said modestly. She wasn't bragging, she was stating a fact. "Prince Charming has at least three, perhaps four, brides. Snow White was the first, then the sleeping beauty, Rapunzel is rumored to be next, then the cinder girl."
 "Cinderella?"
 "Some call her that. But you didn't hear any of this from me."
 "Of course." Wait untill the others heard about all this! "Gretel, you seem like a smart girl, why do you stay around here with that witch of a mother?"
 "Mother's no witch!" she said vehemently. "And I have to stay. Father has turned down all of my suitors, and I cannot make it on my own."
 "Of course you can," I said without thinking. As soon as I said it, I nearly hit myself. I couldn't just go around messing with fairy tales! Gretel was looking at me expectantly, however, so I went on. "I haven't had a man in my every day life for years, and I'm your brother's age. My mother hasn't, either, and she's very successful."
 "You are remarkable, Rachel," Gretel said. "But the kingdom you hail from must be quite different than this. Only witches go out on their own."
 "Gretel! Where are you girl?"
 "That's Mother. I must go." She gathered up her thread bare skirt and hurried into the kitchen. I sighed and laid back down on the mat. Without meaning to, I closed my eyes and fell into a dreamless sleep.

Chapter Three

I woke up early the next morning to Mother's shouting. "Demons! Witches! Get out of here!" I ran out the door to the tiny yard where the woman was waving a broom in the air, still yelling about demons. I looked up and saw the familiar bird of prey silhouettes of my friends.
 "Great," I said to myself, then ran to the crazed woman. "They won't hurt you, I promise, I know them."
 "Then you, too, are a witch!" She accused. "And I let you stay in my home! Eat my food! Wear my clothes!"
 "If you'll just let me explain..."
 "No! Leave! Be gone! And don't come back again! I hope the wolf eats you!" She stormed back into the cabin.
 "Thanks alot, guys," I said to my friends, who were sweeping lower.
 < You look good in burlap, Rachel, > Marco said.
 "Wait 'till I get up there, Marco." I walked into the woods where I wouldn't be seen morphing. No need to add to the witch myth.
 Once deep enough in the woods, I threw off the clothes Gretel had lent me, and began to morph my eagle.
 < Did you learn anything interesting there? Like something that could help us get home? > Jake asked once I was airborne.
 < No, but I learned that the prince has about four wives. >
 < Four? > Cassie asked.
 < Four. The prince is the famous Prince Charming, and he's married to Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Rapunzel and Cinderella. >
 Marco said, laughing.
 < Oh, you do, huh? How do you like this? > I dived down a little and flared when I was beneath Marco. Without air under his wings, he tumbled. I glided away laughing while he righted himself, nothing hurt but his pride. The others were all trying vainly not to laugh.
 < That was evil, Rachel, > Marco said once he was flying smoothly again. < Maybe you are a witch. > I just cackled evilly.
 < Seriously, you two, do you have any idea how we got here? > Jake asked.
 < Rachel flew in on her broomstick, > Marco said innocently while gliding away so I couldn't reach him.
 Ax said slowly.
 < So do I, > Cassie said. < And water. Falling through water. >
 < A pond, > Tobias said. 
 < How'd we fall through it though? > I asked. < Heck, how do you fall through a puddle of water? >
 < Ellimist? > Jake suggested.
 < Not his style, > Tobias answered. < He likes to take credit for what he does. >
 < Don't tell me there's some other all-powerful pain-in-the-butt who's decided to mess with us. > Marco said.
 < Whatever happened, lets get back to where we were when we got here, > Jake said. < Maybe there's something there. >
 Tobias and I said we'd meet up with them later, suffered a smart aleck comment from Marco that I'm not going to repeat, and flew off.

Chapter Four

Once we were in the clearing in which we had first arrived, I landed and started to demorph while Tobias kept a look out for hunters or other odd locals.
 "Okay," I said once I had demorphed. "Now what?"
 < No idea, > Tobias said. < But you'll either want to move out of here or morph 'cause there's a wolf that's going to be here in about a minute. >
 I sighed. "It's probably some magic talking wolf, doubt it could do any real damage." But I started to morph wolf anyway.
 < Hey, isn't there a story where the wolf's tail is chopped off? >
 < Yeah, Little Red Riding Hood, why? > I asked.
 < Well, this wolf doesn't have a tail and it looks like the wound is just a few days old. >
 < That's no probably ordinary wolf, > I said. < It's probably the one those guys were hunting yesterday. >
 The wolf stepped into the clearing at that moment. I turned to face him, growled and bared my teeth, letting the wolf mind have a little more control. She knew how to fight another wolf.
 "Whoa, friend, I do not want to harm you."
 I jerked back in surprise. The wolf had talked! Okay, so after seeing a talking cookie, I shouldn't be surprised, nor with all the time I've spent as an Animorph, but no one expects an animal to talk to you in perfect English.
 < Yes, it was the wolf who said that, > Tobias confirmed before I could ask.
 "Are you one of the shape shifting humans?" The wolf continued.
 I considered not answering for a moment, but I could take this guy easy. I hoped. < Yes, I am. >
 "Good. I've been looking for you."
 < Why? >
 "I played a part in bringing you here."
 < Tobias, get the others, I think they'll want to hear this. >
 < Already told them, they're on their way and should be here any second. >
 < The rest of us will be here in a moment, > I told the wolf. < Once they're here, they're sure to want to know why we were taken here. >
 "Of course," the wolf replied benevolently.
 We waited for the rest of the Animorphs to show up. When they did, in their own wolf morphs, they looked at the wolf, who was sitting placidly, then glanced at me, sitting equally calm.
 < What's going on? > Jake asked.
 < Jake, I'd like you to meet the coordinator of our trip, > I said, indicating the wolf.
 < How did a wolf bring us here? > Cassie asked.
 < Ask him, > I told her. 
 We'd kept our conversation private, so the wolf had no idea what we were talking about. "Hello, friends," he greeted. "I'm Arkhef."
 < A polite wolf, > Marco observed. < A polite wolf who tried to eat Little Red and her Granny. Anyone else see something wrong here? >
 < How did you bring us here? > Jake asked bluntly. < And why? >
 "It wasn't me," Arkhef said. "The castle sorceress brought you here. I merely chose you."
 < Why us? > I asked, repeating Jake's question.
 "You were the only capable ones from your world that wouldn't 'freak out', to borrow one of your phrases, when they found themselves here. As for why you are here...well, I believe that's already happened."
 < What has? > I demanded, getting tired of Arkhef's round-about way of answering.
 "As you have witnessed...women have little freedom here. But I believe one of you has started the movement to change that."
 < Rachel. What did you do? > Marco asked.
 < Nothing! > I said. Then, < Oh, crap. Gretel! >
 < Who? > Jake asked.
 
 < Now we know where fractured fairy tales come from, > Marco said dryly. < Rachel, I can't believe you introduced women's lib to fairy tales! >
 < Hey, according to wolf man, I was supposed to! >
 "If all goes as it should," Arkhef continued calmly, "Gretel will go out on her own, Prince Charming's wives will leave him-"
 < Poor Charming, > Marco said, I hit him with a paw.
 "And to use a human colloquialism, they will all live happily ever after."
 < Not Charming. >
 < Marco, don't make me hurt you. >
 < How do we get home? > Cassie asked.
 "The sorceress shall be here shortly," Arkhef said. "She shall know how to get you home."
 "I'm sorry to keep you waiting," a voice said suddenly.
 We all looked around, startled, but didn't see the owner of the voice. Slowly, though, the air next to Arkhef started to shimmer, and slowly, the figure of a human woman emerged.
 "Lenari," Arkhef said, making a small bow to the newcomer. "I present you the humans who've helped us."
 "Thank you, Arkhef," the woman-Lenari-said. She turned to us, "I'm sorry you were brought here without warning, but I assure you I had good reason."
 < Arkhef already explained that, > I said. < We just want to go home. Now. >
 "Fair enough," Lenari said placidly. "I'll take you to the castle, for that's where my spell book is. I warn you, however, that the atmosphere may not be to your liking."
 < Why? Your lair in the dungeon or something? > Marco asked. Lenari gave him a withering look, somehow she could tell us apart, "No. But the effects of your presence have already begun there."
 She raised her hands for a moment, but just before she started to speak, she looked back at us. "You may wish to 'demorph'. I do not know if my lab could hold you." She turned to Arkhef. "Friend Arkhef, I'm afraid I cannot take you with us."
 Arkhef nodded. "I know, Friend Lenari. Good bye. Good bye, human friends." He slowly walked back into the underbrush.
 Once Arkhef was gone and we had demorphed, Lenari started the spell again. I felt a tingling sensation begin in my stomach which quickly spread throughout my entire body. Before I could register anything else, I found myself in a dark room with the others. Lenari was rushing around, lighting candles, while the rest of us just stood around, taking in the shock of having been transported from the woods to a dark stone room.
 Lenari started flipping through a huge book on what seemed to be the main table in the room. "Here it--"
 "You! You whiny little witch!"
 "What was that?" Cassie asked.
 Lenari looked as though she hadn't noticed. "What? Oh, you mean the arguing? That's just the various princesses fighting over the prince."
 < Don't tell us Rachel started this, > Tobias said. < She just talked to Gretel last night. >
 "This is the land of magic," Lenari reminded us. "Anything can happen."
 "Whatever," I said. "Can we get out of here?"
 Lenari nodded sympathetically. She turned back to her book and began saying a spell, just loud enough for us to hear:
 "These children have been taken unwilling
 Chosen to come here to do my bidding.
 Their task completed, seemingly succeeded
 Send them to the world they belong."

Chapter Five

    There was no flash of light, no warning of any kind that we'd be sent anywhere, but suddenly we were back in the woods. Our woods.
    "That was weird," Marco said, breaking the shocked silence.
    Jake dug around in the bag we had put all our outer clothes in, pulling out his watch. "According to this, no time passed. Lenari must have brought us back to the same time we started."
    "Well, I feel like two days has passed," Marco complained. "Sleeping in the woods is not fun."
    "Everyone go home and rest," Jake said. "The mission wasn't that important, we can try again later."
    I said good bye to everyone, morphed eagle and flew home.

    I spent the rest of the day lounging around the house, thankful for a day off, knowing that I would be run ragged tonight watching my sisters while Mom was at a business dinner.
    Mom had left around eight. Sara had to be in bed by nine. Naturally, she fought me the entire time.
    "I don't wanna go to bed! I'm not tired."
    "I don't care," I told her. "Get into bed. Or I'll page Mom. Do you really want her mad at you?" It was an idle threat, I wouldn't page Mom over something so trivial, but Sara didn't have to know that.
    It worked. "Fine," Sara pouted, and crawled into her bed. Just as I was about to turn off the light, she said quietly, "Rachel? Can you tell me a story?"
    I sighed. "I don't know any."
    "Yes you do," she insisted.
    I walked back and sat on the edge of her bed. "All right, what one do you want?"
    "Make one up," she said. "One about princesses and princes and giants and wizards and cookies."
    I nearly laughed, "Cookies?"
    "Like the gingerbread man."
    I shook my head in amusement. I could give her a story like that easy. "Once upon a time, in fairy tale land, there was a wizard called Lenari who realized her land had a problem..."

Author's Notes: Wow, scary, I didn't write a depressing or sappy fic!!! Yea me!!! Anywho, hope you all liked it :-) Oh, and major thanks to Bob for helping me with the title, you're a lifesaver!!!

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