M&T #8: The End
By: Maggie
MAGGIE
Suicide. One word that I always feared the most. The reason I feared it
was because I always knew it was my destiny. When I started the fight,
I was told never to care or let anyone care in return. I had never obeyed
that
rule. Now I wish I did.
The Animorphs have started to care about me, so I know this will be hard
on a lot of them. I told Tobias that my death was inevitable, but I never
told him that it was so near. Maybe he will understand what I'm about to
do. Or perhaps he won't, because I know how much he loves me. He's my brother
and I will always love him, one of my greatest mistakes.
I've always known I was going to die young. The Ellimist told me himself
that he would kill me. My death date was tomorrow. But I don't go down
like that, if I have to be destroyed, I'll do it myself. My hands are starting
to shake as I write a letter to my friends, the Animorphs.
Funny, minutes before my death I consider them my friends. I never thought
I really belonged with them. I pick up the gun I'm about to use on myself.
And I am afraid, god help me, I don't know what else to do. I've
fought this moment for 5 years. But its coming, very fast. I put
the gun in my mouth, Just don't let it hurt was my last thought as I pulled
the trigger.
MARCO
Maggie had been acting really distant lately so I decided to pay her a
visit. I mean, I AM her boyfriend (kinda). So I brought over a movie and
got ready for a fight. Maggie hated it when I just show up without notice,
so I have to do it at every possible chance.
"Maggie? You in there?" I yelled when no one answered my ring. Taking out
my key to her apartment (Tobias and Maggie gave one to each of us for emergencies)
I opened the door. I walked around when I didn't see her, and then
headed towards her room. Knocking on it, she still didn't answer. So I
opened the door and then saw Maggie, Maggie with blood all over her and
a gun in her mouth.
For a second I couldn't move. Dead, Maggie is dead. That's the only thing
I could think about. Then I ran to the bathroom and threw up my lunch.
I couldn't move for a second. I closed my eyes for a second and convinced
myself that this was just a bad dream. When I opened my eyes I would be
back in bed. I almost convinced myself, until I opened my eyes that
is. When I opened them, I was still in Maggie and Tobias'
apartment and as I walked to Maggie's
room and as I saw her laying there, dead. Then I started to scream.
TOBIAS
I hurried up to my apartment when I heard loud and somewhat familiar
screaming. The door was already unlocked so I ran in,
"Maggie?" That's when I recognized the yell, Marco. "Marco? What's wrong?"
"Oh god, she's dead…" was his faint reply
I felt panic starting to take over my body, I came to a complete stop,
"Who's dead?"
"Oh god,"I could tell that he was in Maggie's room, even then I didn't
even think that it was Maggie that had
died. I ran into her room and stopped.
Maggie was laying dead on the ground with a gun in her mouth. Suicide,
it was the only possibility. But why? Maggie was….Oh god, that's what she
meant when she told me that her death was enviable. But why hadn't she
told me that it was soon. The tears started then, I couldn't stop them.
I
felt a little strange, Marco and I were
never really close. But soon we were both crying, standing up and staring
at Maggie. But it wasn't Maggie anymore, Maggie was gone.
RACHEL
I got the call from Tobias around two o'clock in the afternoon, I could
tell he had been crying. "Tobias? What's wrong?"
"Its…its Maggie."
"What about Maggie?" I asked urgently. Maggie and I were never really close,
but she was still a friend.
"She's dead."
I drew in a breath and put the phone down for a moment, after I collected
myself I picked up the phone, "I'll get everyone else, don't freak
out, It'll be ok."
JAKE
We had all gathered in Ma…I mean Tobias' apparment. Cassie was next to
me crying softly, holding on to me like her life depended on it. Tobias
and Rachel were on the couch, both were crying but Rachel hid her tears
from Tobias and was trying to confort him. Ax was in the corner looking
like he didn't know what to say. Marco..Marco wasn't doing well at all,
he was pacing back and forth basically freaking out. As for me, I mean
I didn't know what to do, so I just sat there, stunned. I mean, suicide,
who would have thought about it for Maggie. She always seemed in control.
A little spazy, but always in control.
We had shut the door because know one wanted to look at Maggie and no one
wanted to move her. Tobias had taken the gun and set it in the kitchen.
We didn't know what to do. All of a sudden Marco exploded, "WHY? Why the
hell did she have to kill herself"
Tobias spoke up for the first time, "Because she didn't want to be killed"
We all looked at him like he had lost his mind, sighing, he continued,
"She once told me that her death was inevitable, and that she would be
killed,"
Marco's voice got really low, "And why exactly didn't you tell us?"
"Because I had no idea what that meant, Marco. How was I supposed to know
that my twin sister was going to kill herself the next week? And she even
told me never to tell anyone." Tobias paused, "Especially you Marco."
MARCO
Why didn't Maggie trust me? We had been close, and I thought that
she would have told me something, anything. I couldn't believe that she
had told Tobias not to tell me, especially. It was only 4 o'clock and I
was ready to go to sleep and never wake up. I still couldn't comprehend
that she was dead. It wasn't possible! Maggie was too young, too beautiful,
too… oh god, she was really gone. It was weird about how much this
hurt. Maggie and I had only been friends
for a few months and dating for about 3 weeks. Yet, it was almost to painful
to bare. Although there was nothing to be pained about, I realized, if
Maggie was selfish enough to put us all through this, she wasn't worth
crying over. But that realization didn't matter, because as soon as I got
to my room, I cried and couldn't stop.
MAGGIE
Well, this was confusing. One minute I was nice and dead with a bullet
in my head and the next I was in paradise. My joy had no bounds, and it
wasn't because of my beautiful surroundings, or because of the wonderful
realization of life after death, no it was….I can't explain it to you unless
you ever knew complete and utter happiness, which, unless you're dead,
you can't.
Sounds weird doesn't it? I mean I had just said that death=happiness, and
I know that's not right. But as I looked around this realm that I
was in, I realized that death wasn't so final as mortals believe. Death
meant the end or final, and "death" wasn't like that at all. I was being
reborn, all the guilt, blood, lives, lies, hate, or pain was
gone. I felt no regret for my suicide,
and I wasn't worried about anyone that I had left behind….not even, umm….Tom?
Taylor? Toby…
All of a sudden it was like waking up from a dream, Tobias, oh god, what
was he going through? All of a sudden the surroundings fanished
VERY GOOD MAGGIE, I WAS WORRIED THAT YOU WOULD FORGET
The Ellimist, I thought, I die and the guy still fallows me. "Forget what
exactly?"
WHEN A MORTAL DIES, THEY BEGIN TO LOSE ALL MEMORIES AND AWARNESS OF THEIR
PAST LIFE. ITS NORMAL AND TO BE EXPECTED, BUT FOR ELLIMISTS TO BECOME COMPLETE
THEY MUST FIGHT IT. YOU DID.
"Great" I muttered, then it hit me about what he had said "Excuse me? Ellimist?
I'm Maggie. You know, me. The blond, mean, and fashionable dressed girl.
The one who is SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!"
CALM DOWN. ALL IS WELL. YOU WILL NOW TAKE MY PLACE AS THE ELLIMIST, AND
I WILL SHOW YOU HOW….
RACHEL
Tobias and I were in his bed, he had finally fallen asleep. I was worried
about him. I hated Maggie at that moment., Why had she done this to us?
Why did she hurt Tobias and Marco so much. I briefly thought about him,
Marco had run out of the apartment after Tobias yelled at him. I really
couldn't blame him, I could imagine what it would feel like to lose Tobias.
Stroking Tobias' hair I thought about what Maggie had said to me once
Maggie? What's the matter, you spaced?
Oh, sorry Rachel, but I was worried about something.
What?
Tobias' and mines destiny.
Heavy thinking for a Saturday morning.
She had said that on one of the few days we had hung out together. I hadn't
given it much thought at the time. Now I couldn't get my mind of that word
"Destiny" I wondered if it really exist. And if it does, did Maggie know
hers?
MAGGIE
I was changed. My life had passed before me, and I was no longer the girl
that had lived it, I was the woman who had watched it. One moment of my
life had stayed in my mind, the time when I was three and been told what
the Yeerks were and what my purpose was. The Ellimist explained everything
to me that fateful night.
I had been out late at night playing with some friends with parents supervision.
But I had wondered away and went over to look at this building called YIH.
I went to look in the window when something came up behind me. A weird
alien, like a big disgusting worm. It started to attack me but I was too
quick, I jerked my body into it and it exploded, I ran home crying, not
talking to anyone.
*11 YEARS AGO*
When I got into the house, I realized I couldn't have done that. It was
impossible for a 3 year old. Then another fact hit me, why and how did
I realize that I shouldn't have been able to do that? As soon as I thought
that a old man appeared out of no where.
BECAUSE YOU ARE DIFFERENT
"Swell, and who are you?" That was another surprise, I defiantly sounded…older,
like the big kids.
I AM A BEING CALLED THE ELLIMIST, I CHANGED YOU WHEN YOU WERE BORN. YOU
ARE A
HALF ELLIMIST. AND THE REASON YOU SOUND
AND THINK DIFFERENT IS BECAUSE OF THAT. YOU ARE SMARTER THAN ANYONE YOUR
AGE, OR IN TIME, YOURS AND MANY OTHER RACES. YOU ARE UNIQUE. YOU WERE CREATED
TO PROTECT AND SERVE. YOU WILL PROTECT A BOY, WHO YOU WILL SOON MEET.
"And who would this boy be?"
I CANNOT TELL YOU HIS NAME OR FACE. AND YOU WILL PROTECT HIM WITHOUT YOU
KNOWING IT. BUT THIS BOY IS THE CENTER OF CREATION, THE COURSE OF EARTH
AND THE UNIVERSE WILL CHANGE WITH HIM. HE IS A BEGINNING, AS WELL AS AN
END.
"So your telling me this kid has a lot on his shoulders?" The Ellimist
smiled but didn't say anything.
IN YOUR SHORT TIME ON EARTH, YOU WILL FIGHT THE YEERKS.
"And they would be.."
Well, you can guess where it went from there, the Ellimist explained the
Yeerks and morphing to me. He told me my strengths and limitations. As
you might have figured the "boy" was Tobias. Funny, only now I realize
who it was. I took all of the aliens stuff pretty well, but the thing that
got me was how fast my mind worked now. I already had an idea on a computer
program that would help me. And I saw how weak our technology was. And
the way my mind worked now, I knew I no longer had the mind of a 3 year
old. The day after that, I met Tobias (nice timing huh?)
I mean when I broke into the orphanage, come on. A normal 6 year old could
never think up that. Tobias was actually pretty dense not to notice. When
we started living on our own (Tobias and I) I morphed into a adult (although
to this day Tobais still believes that the government allows us to live
on our own) to rent and all that. (a/n: well there you go to all you people
who send me letters about those facts, and yes I had that planed, uh-huh,
yep, the whole time)
Suddenly the Ellimist voice sounded out through the cosmos. WELL?
"Well what?"
WILL YOU BECOME ME?
TOBAIS
I smiled looking at an old picture of Maggie and me, we looked so young.
Although Maggie had started to fight. I think I was pretty dense not to
notice. We had just had her funeral and everyone was depressed. I was
going back to New York for a week, my
NY friends insisted that I shouldn't be alone in the house and that I had
to stay with them. There was no way of getting out of it. Normally it would
feel good to have friends like that, but
now I felt like nothing would never feel
good.
Rachel was coming over in a few minutes to say goodbye (and knowing
Rachel re-pack for me). The other Animorphs were coming over later, but
Rachel and I wanted to talk in private.
I heard the door open and Rachel come in.
"Hey," she said softly. Black wasn't Rachel's color, but she still looked
beautiful. God help me that I noticed.
"Hi Rach, how are you doing?"
She studied my face, which held a poker face that no one could figure out
except Maggie "Better than you obviously, don't think I can't figure out
what your feeling through that face." Or Rachel it seemed.
"I'll be ok, I know she's happy now. I mean there has to be life-after
death."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because if there wasn't Maggie would kick God's ass then come back and
come back to complain."
Rachel laughed "Yeah, I bet she would."
I smiled "Well, I guess I'm back to being alone again." Those words popped
out, and I wanted to reach out and take them back when I saw the hurt look
on Rachel's face.
"Tobias, you'll never be alone, you have me." She leaned against me and
put her head on my chest.
"I know, I just meant…" My voice trailed off.
"Don't worry about it. I know how much you loved her." She shifted her
position so she was looking up at me. "But the one thing you might not
know is how much I love you." She kissed me softly and looked at me in
the eye, "And I want you that I'll always be here for you to talk to, not
just as a girlfriend."
"I know.." Rachel cut me off with a kiss, and it felt pretty good.
TO
BE CONTINUED...
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