"Not My Problem"

~School. Bell rings, JAKE walks over to his locker~

JAKE: ~takes a note off his locker, reads it~

JAKE VO: Oh, great.

MARCO: ~closes JAKE'S locker~ I'm going to kick your butt at Space Destroyer 3 tonight.

JAKE:Not tonight. I'm way behind on my homework courtesy of you know what.

MARCO: So? Do it later. Come on.

JAKE: Marco. Please.

RACHEL: ~comes up by MARCO~ Jake, I need your help with something.

MARCO: What am I, invisible?

JAKE: I can't tonight, Rach.

RACHEL: Jake, come on. You have to.

MARCO: Like you always say to me, Jake: You haven't got a choice.

JAKE: Not. Tonight. ~slams locker shut, walks away, leaving a stunned RACHEL and MARCO~

JAKE: ~walking in house. Sets down bag and books~ Hey, Mom! We got anything to eat? ~walks into kitchen~

JAKE VO: Our secret struggle against the Yeerks goes on. But it's not just the fight that wears you down. I mean, it's tough to act like everything's cool when the enemy's everywhere. Even in your own home.

TOM: Hey, Jake!

JAKE: ~turns around from raiding fridge just in time to catch an orange TOM threw at him~ Hey. I didn't know anybody was home.

TOM:~walks over and takes back orange~ What 'cha up to?

JAKE: Just listenin' to some music.

TOM: ~takes milk carton out of fridge~ Homework can always wait, huh? ~drinks from carton~

JAKE: Is Mom around?

TOM: ~wipes mouth with sleeve, replaces carton~ Nope. We're gonna go play some hoops. ~two other boys come in, surround JAKE~ Wanna come?

JAKE: ~shakes head~ No. ~turns around, walks into other guys~

FRIEND ONE: C'mon, we need a fourth.

JAKE: ~tries to move past him, but FRIEND ONE blocks him~

TOM: Leave him alone, guys. He's too scared to play against me, I understand.

JAKE: ~looks back at TOM~ Thanks for the support, Tom. Really.

~door slams, NIKKI and GREG walk in~

NIKKI: Hi, guys.

GREG: What's goin' on?

JAKE: ~sighs walks out of kitchen, goes to bedroom~ I can't do this anymore! ~throws notebook and text book onto bed, sits on bed~ I quit. ~Rests head on hand, suddenly looks behind him, the ELLIMIST is standing behind his bed~

ELLIMIST: Is that what you want, Jake?

 Opening Theme interupts here

JAKE: Ellimist? ~sarcastically~ There really is no escape, is there?

ELLIMIST: That's your choice, Jake. Only you can choose to give up your fight.

JAKE: ~stands up, slwoly walks towards ELLIMIST~ This is not my fight. I'm a teenager. I can not carry the fate of the entire human race on my shoulders. It's too much! It's way too much.

ELLIMIST: The Yeerks have invaded your world, I can not change that fact.

JAKE:I know. But I don't wanna be the one responsible to stop them.

ELLIMIST: What about your friends? Your decision will impact them as well.

JAKE: ~sitting down on bed~ I can't speak for them. I just wanna be normal again. I wish I'd never met Elfangor and I wish I'd never gotten involved in this stupid fight.

ELLIMIST: You're certain?

JAKE: Yes.

ELLIMIST: Very well. Because of all you've done for your race, I shall honor your request.

~we see JAKE and his room become blue, then brighten to white, then suddenly we're looking at the outside of his house, the white dims to blue, then normal~

JAKE: ~walks into kitchen, pulls carton of milk out of fridge, box of cereal out of cupboard, spoon out of drawer, and a bowl out of the cupboard. sits down at dining room table and pours cereal and milk into bowl as NIKKI and GREG walk into kitchen~

NIKKI: Well he's never been like this before. It must be growing pains.

GREG: Nikki, I think it's bigger than that. We should limit his after school activities.

NIKKI: Why don't you just talk to him, and find out what the matter is?

GREG: I've tried. He doesn't seem to think there's a problem.

JAKE: ~stands up from table, walks into kitchen~ Mom, Dad.

NIKKI: Hey, Hi, Jake.

GREG: Hi, Jake.

JAKE: I'm worried about him, too.

NIKKI: I know, honey.

JAKE: I think I can talk to him.

TOM: ~walking in~ Talk to who?

JAKE: Hey, Tom. What's up?

TOM: What're you guys talkin' about?

JAKE: My geometry teacher. I can't tell the difference between an isosolese triangle and a ping pong ball. ~NIKKI and GREG laugh~ He's on me about it.

TOM: Why am I not surprised? Okay, okay. I can help ya' out.

NIKKI: Tom, do you have any plans for tonight? It's just that Mitzi has given us some theatre tickets and--

TOM: No can do. Some friends and I, we rented this club. We're having a party.

GREG:The, uh, Sharing group? ~TOM nods~ Why don't you take your brother along? Might be a good influence.

TOM: ~looks at JAKE~ Yeah, actually, I was thinkin' you should check it out. Could give us the chance to hang a little bit more.

JAKE: ~looks amazed that TOM just invited him to hang out~ Yeah!

TOM: Allright.

NIKKI: Good.

~outside the school. TOBIAS is walking near some trees, as if watching someone. He walks over to the sidewalk, right behind RACHEL and in front of JAKE~

JAKE: Rachel! ~runs to catch up with her~ Hey, Rach. Look who's behind you again.

RACHEL: ~looks over shoulder, just as TOBIAS ducks out of sight~ Tobias?!

JAKE: Yeah. Don't you think it's weird how he's always following you?

RACHEL: Jealous?

JAKE: Oh, come on!  Listen, I'm going to a party tonight with Tom, it's by his club. Wanna come?

RACHEL: Who else is going?

JAKE: ~checks watch~ Oh, man, I'm late! Chapman wants to see me.

RACHEL: What about?

JAKE: I don't know. Will you bring Cassie?

RACHEL: ~smiles mischeiviously~ Maybe.

JAKE: ~smiles, runs off~   See ya' later, don't forget!

~cut to JAKE knocking on CHAPMAN'S office door~

CHAPMAN: ~looks up from something at his desk~ Ah, Jake! ~motions with hand~ Come in! Come in!

JAKE: ~walks in, as he's about to close door, he notices TOBIAS across the hall, reading a book. Looks at him for a sec, but closes door~

TOBIAS: ~looks up from book, watches the door for a moment, then walks away~

~in the science lab, students are in pairs working with chemicals. RACHEL and TOBIAS are a pair~

RACHEL: If I have to do another chemicle experament, I'm gonna have a meltdown.

TOBIAS: ~laughs~ Well, there are worse things in life than chem class.

RACHEL: Such as?

TOBIAS: Oh, well...things.

RACHEL: Nothing too terrible, I hope. ~watches something in a beaker bubble and fizz~ Well at least give me a hint.

TOBIAS: ~leans closer to RACHEL, lowers voice slightly~ Look, don't you think people around here have been kinda...acting weird lately?

RACHEL: Like who, for instance?

TOBIAS: ~looks around room, looks at a girl with that "I'm perfect and there's nothing you can do about it" auras~ Like her ~the girl looks back at them. When RACHEL turns to look, she looks back to her expiriment~ I mean, untill last week she was totally twisted. Full of obnoxious remarks and goofy jokes and...stiff.

RACHEL: So? Maybe her parents grounded her or something.

TOBIAS:~laughs derisively~ It wasn't her parents that turned her around.

RACHEL: ~laughs~ What do you mean?

TOBIAS: Just skip it. It's too grim.

RACHEL: ~smiles~ I love grim.

TOBIAS: It would put you in danger. In fact, you already are. ~RACHEL raises eyebrows~ Everyone is.

RACHEL: From what? Terrorists? The O-Zone layer? Fatty foods? Tobias?

TOBIAS: You wouldn't believe me if I told you.

RACHEL: Try me.

~cut to RACHEL and CASSIE walking home~

CASSIE: ~laughing~ Slugs living in people's heads?

RACHEL: He's totally crackers! Like, off the deep end.

CASSIE: ~pause~ He's so cute.

RACHEL: ~cringes jokingly~ I know! ~laughs~  So he's got some flipped ideas. It's not like he's hurting anyone.

CASSIE: If that's what he wants to believe...~shrugs~

RACHEL: Anyways, he's fixated on this Sharing thing. We're gonna check it out tonight. ~CASSIE nods~  You should come by, ~nudges her and grins~ Jake'll be there.

~JAKE and TOM playing basketball in their driveway~

JAKE: ~runs past TOM, shoots a perfect lay-up~ Weren't payin' attention. ~gives TOM the ball~

TOM: Yeah, yeah, whatever.

JAKE: C'mon. ~TOM bounce passes the ball to him, he dribbles, runs towards TOM, tries to shoot over him, TOM blocks, takes the ball back~

TOM: Nice try, Jake-O, but I've been doing this alot longer than you have. ~does some fancy dribbling between his legs, back and forth, when GREG comes up and steals the ball from him~

GREG: ~shoots, ball goes in, laughs~ Swish! Two points! ~goes inside~

JAKE: ~gets the rebound~ Too bad college entrance exams aren't as easy as basketball. You don't seem to worried about the exams. ~passes ball to TOM~

TOM: ~dribbles, runs towards JAKE, tries to shoot, JAKE blocks~ I'm not worried about a thing. ~grins, goes inside~

~at the party later that night, TOM's standing by the DJ's booth~

TOM:  ~talking into mic~ I am Tom, welcome to the Spotter club. We've got some great tunes for ya', and the place is ours 'till midnight, so let's PARTY! ~crowd cheers~

RACHEL: ~walks in, looks around, sees MARCO standing by the bar, dressed like a prep, sweater tied around this shoulders and everything~ Marco?! I didn't know you were coming!

MARCO: I joined The Sharing last week. ~notices RACHEL staring at his clothes~ What's wrong?

RACHEL: It's just...I guess I haven't seen you dressed up before,that's all.

MARCO: ~looks himself up and down~ It's still me, Rachel. I just cleaned up my act a little bit, that's all. And for the better. You can too.

RACHEL: Um...right. Have you seen Jake?

MARCO: He's around. Welcome to the club. Oh, and, keep your ears open.

RACHEL: ~gives him a 'yeah, right' look, nods, and goes off to find JAKE, MARCO watching her~

JAKE: ~sitting at a table~ Hey! Rachel!

RACHEL: ~looks around to see where he is, sees him, smiles, walks over~

JAKE: Hey, I'm glad your here. I was wondering if you'd make it.

RACHEL: What's with Marco? He's acting really weird.

JAKE: You're surprised? See, if Marco wasn't acting weird, that'd be weird. ~looks over RACHEL'S shoulder~ Hey, look who's here.

RACHEL: ~turns around, sees TOBIAS~  I invited him. He's a nice guy, Jake.

JAKE: ~looks troubled~ If you say so.

RACHEL: He's funny. Totally paranoid. He says we're all in danger. ~JAKE laughs~ I figured he needed to get out of the house.  ~JAKE nods~ He thinks there's this big conspiricy and that Chapman's part of it, too.

JAKE: ~looks back behind him~ Can you hold on a second? I'll be right back. ~leaves~

JAKE: ~walks over to the bar where CASSIE is waiting~  Hey!

CASSIE: Hey!

JAKE: Glad ya' could come.

CASSIE: Good party.

JAKE: Rachel and I are sitting just over there ~points in direction he came from. Looks over CASSIE'S shoulder, sees TOBIAS going into a side room~ Um, can I get you another drink?

CASSIE: Actually, I was just looking for the bathroom.

JAKE: ~points~ It's right over there.

CASSIE: ~nods~ Thanks ~walks away~

JAKE: ~walks towards the room where TOBIAS went~

TOBIAS: ~in a dark room with lots of electronic equipment. Starts turning the dial on an electric board of some sort~

JAKE: We're not supposed to be back here.

TOBIAS: ~doesn't say anything~

JAKE: ~walks over to him~ Rachel told me what you said. ~looks around~ Look, I've been kind of suspicious, too. I mean, my brother's been acting weird.If you wanna talk about it--

TOBIAS: Get out of here! It's too dangerous. The Sharing is a front--

JAKE: A front?

TOBIAS: ~nods~

JAKE: For what?

TOBIAS: For an alien conspiracy.

JAKE: You know what? You've been watching way too much Mystery Science Theatre...

TOBIAS: Listen, you're brother's one of them--

TOM: ~walking in~ What's up?

JAKE: Just shootin' the breeze.

TOM: ~nods~ Well, shoot it somewhere else, Jake.

GUY: ~walks in, stands next to TOM~ Everything alright here?

TOBIAS: Well, I know when I'm not wanted. ~starts to leave. Another guy comes in, grabs him. The two guys escort him out~

~out in the main area~

GIRL: Hey, look! ~points to two guys and TOBIAS~

RACHEL: Tobias?

TOBIAS: Remember what I said! ~is shoved past~

~back in side room~

TOM: What were you guys talkin' about?

JAKE: He thinks The Sharing is a front for an alien conspiricy.

~main area~

CASSIE: ~walking to RACHEL~ Yuck, this place could use a Janitor.

RACHEL: Cas? What's wrong?

CASSIE: In the bathroom. I went in the wrong room and I saw in this sink this kind of a gross slug.

~side room~

JAKE: He also said that you were one of them.

TOM: And what do you think?

JAKE: I think that if he knows too much about us we have to move quickly. Very, quickly. We have to do something to stop him.

~at school~

TOBIAS: ~walks in door, nearly runs into RACHEL~  Rachel!

RACHEL: ~slows down, turns around~

TOBIAS: You okay?
 

RACHEL: How 'bout you?

TOBIAS: Fine. It took me awhile to shake off Frankenstein's sons. Did you see anything...weird...after I left last night?

RACHEL: Um...Cassie said she saw some gross slug in the bathroom. We took off right after you left.

TOBIAS: Look. From now on you have to be super careful. You can't trust anyone. Not even--~looks over her shoulder~

CASSIE: Hey, Rach.

RACHEL: ~turns around~  Hey.

CASSIE: ~notices TOBIAS~ Well, ~sighs~ Later. ~walks away, keeping an eye on TOBIAS~

TOBIAS: Did you leave the party before her?

RACHEL: You don't think...? But she's my best friend!

TOBIAS: Don't you get it? They can be anyone.

JAKE: Hey, guys. What's up? ~to TOBIAS~ Tobias, I'm sorry about last night. My brother was way out of line. No hard feelings?

TOBIAS: Nah, it's cool. ~pause~ I've gotta go to class. See ya' later. ~walks away~

JAKE: ~watches after him~ So, what were you guys talking about?

RACHEL: ~just smiles~

~JAKE outside of CHAPMAN'S office~

JAKE: ~knocks~

CHAPMAN: Ah, Jake! Come in, come in!

JAKE: ~walks in~ You asked to see me?

CHAPMAN: Right, right. Why don't you, uh, close the door and take a seat. ~takes a seat behind his desk as JAKE closes the door~

JAKE: ~turns around once door is closed~  He knows.

CHAPMAN: Who's that, sir?

JAKE: Don't 'sir' me, five-five-four. ~walks towards CHAPMAN'S desk~ That kids Tobias. He knows everything. ~leans across desk~ He must be working with an Andalite.

CHAPMAN: ~starts to stand up~ I can assure you, sir--

JAKE: Sit. Down. ~CHAPMAN does so, meekly~

CHAPMAN: Yes, sir.

JAKE: It was your responsibility to weed out any suspicious students. Now we have a spy on our hands, or worse. If my host's brother and I hadn't caught him last night, he might have discovered the location of the kandrona.

CHAPMAN: I'll keep an eye on him.

JAKE: ~sighs~ It's too late for that. Visser Three has instructed me to deal with the situation directly. And if anything like this happens again...

CHAPMAN: It won't happen again!

JAKE: You're the one who's going to be in detention. ~smirks slightly~ And I don't mean school. ~lets that sink in~ There are plenty of other Yeerks who'd love to wear the principal's hat. Just remember that. ~starts to leave. As he's in the door way...~ Thanks for the advice, Principal Chapman. I'll try to be more concientious in the future. ~smiles, closes door~

TOBIAS: ~in lizard morph, on the floor just outside of CHAPMAN'S door~ < This is getting out of hand. > ~crawls through a grate leading into the boy's bathroom, demorphs, opens door, looks around hall, leaves~

~in a different hall way, kids are leaving class~

TOBIAS: ~walks up to a locker, starts to open it, then notices JAKE. He's just standing in the middle of the hallway, staring at TOBIAS. The two stare at eachother for exactly 30 seconds before JAKE leaves~

~RACHEL'S house. Phone rings~

RACHEL: ~answers phone~  Hello?

TOBIAS: ~on phone~ Rachel. It's me.

RACHEL: Oh, hi, Cassie.

TOBIAS: Okay, you can't talk. ~RACHEL smiles at JAKE, who's in the room with her~ Uh, I need your help. I know I can trust you. Meet me tonight in the back room of the Spotter Club. 8:30, I'll wait for you in the side doorway.

RACHEL: Yeah, sure, I can get you my history notes.

TOBIAS: That's where they keep something they don't want anyone to see. And Jake's gonna try and follow you, but don't let him. He can't know about any of this.

RACHEL: Alright, Cass. Thanks for calling. ~hangs up. JAKE looks at her, she doesn't say anything~

~later, at the deserted club~ 

RACHEL: Hello? Tobias? Where are you? Tobias? Is anybody here?

JAKE: ~stepping out from behind a corner~  Rachel.

RACHEL: ~she spins around to face him~ Jake. What're you doing here?

JAKE: ~takes a few steps towards her~ That's funny, I was going to ask you the same question.

RACHEL:~backing up~ I-I-I left something here last night.

JAKE: ~nodding, still walking towards her~ So you did.

RACHEL: What're you going to do?

JAKE: ~smirks~ I think you already know.

TOBIAS: ~in lion morph, roars. JAKE turns around, scared, RACHEL backs away slowly~ 

JAKE: ~starts backing away, hits something, falls down, hits head on way down, passes out~ 

RACHEL: Jake!

TOBIAS: ~walking towards JAKE~ < Don't be afraid, Rachel. It's me. >

RACHEL: ~taking a step closer~ Tobias? But how?

TOBIAS: ~demorphs~   Sorry. ~stands up, walks to her~ I didn't mean to scare you. I'll explain everything later. ~looks at JAKE, who's still out cold~ But first...

RACHEL: What should we do about Jake?

~TOBIAS tieing JAKE'S wrists with some cord~ 

RACHEL: ~watching~ You mean every three days the Yeerk crawls out of his ear to soak up energy?

TOBIAS: ~nods~ That's why we have to destroy the kandrona.

JAKE: You can't win, Tobias. There's too many of us.

TOBIAS: Where's the kandrona?

JAKE: Do you really think I'd tell you?

TOBIAS: Well if not we'll wait for that Yeerk to slide out of your ear and hear from the real Jake.

JAKE: The real Jake doesn't exist anymore.~smug~ He belongs to me. ~looks back to TOBIAS~ One question, Human. Where's the Andalite? The one that's been following our every move.

RACHEL: This human was the lion. ~TOBIAS looks at her in shock~ 

TOBIAS: Rachel!

RACHEL: ~in a monotone~ I saw him morph.

JAKE: ~while TOBIAS is backing away from RACHEL~ So that's it. It's been you all along. Elfangor gave you the  power to morph.

TOBIAS: ~softly~No. ~louder~ Rachel, not you too.

RACHEL: Like the man says, we're everywhere. ~TOBIAS turns to run, but is met by MARCO, CASSIE and TOM, all looking determined to stop him~ 

JAKE: Good work, two-four-nine. ~watches as TOBIAS runs past him, to be stopped by two other guys, the two who escorted him away the night before~   Sorry, Toby. I forgot to tell you, she's been ours since last night. You fell right into our trap. Morph if you think you have the strength, but I wouldn't. An animal can be gotten just as easily as a human.

RACHEL: ~starts shaking her head and wincing. Puts hand to head as if she has a headache~   Tobias! Forgive me, I didn't mean to! ~doubles over, moaning, as Yeerk tries to regain control~ 

JAKE: ~looks almost amused~ They fight back from time to time. ~TOM starts to undo the rope around his wrists and ankles~ They always loose. ~stands up~ 

VISSER THREE: ~in human morph~ Nicely done, Jake.

JAKE: ~looks amazed that VISSER THREE is talking to him. Bows slightly~ Visser Three. I present to you the so-called 'Andalite Warrior'. And with it, the end of the human resistance on Earth.

VISSER THREE: You have done very well. Now it is time to collect your reward. On behalf of the Yeerk Empire, I now name you Visser Ten. ~JAKE nearly grins.~ 

TOBIAS: There'll be others like me.

JAKE: No there won't. And those that do come will be too late.

TOBIAS: And the Kandrona?

JAKE: It's right here. Right under everyone's noses.

TOBIAS:  ~looks down, shakes head~ We should have been on the same side, Jake. We should have fought together.

JAKE: We will, Tobias. Just not the side you wanted. ~TOM holds him a metal thermos-like container. JAKE takes a pair of oversized tweezers, uses them to take out a Yeerk slug. Suddenly, let's it and the tweezers drop. Moves hand to head, breathing heavy~ Don't make me do this!

TOBIAS: ~fighting to get away~ Fight it Jake! You have to fight it!

JAKE: ~sinking to floor~ I don't want to do this!

TOBIAS: Jake! C'mon!

VISSER THREE: ~steps closer to JAKE. In a low menacing voice, talking over JAKE and TOBIAS~ Get control of yourself.

JAKE: No! NOOOO!!! ~the flash thing from the begining again. JAKE is sitting on his bed~ No!

CASSIE: ~outside his door~ Jake? Jake, you in there?


JAKE: ~standing up~ Yeah. Yeah. ~looks at himself in the mirror~ I am. ~goes to open door~

CASSIE: ~looking concerned. Holding out a book~ Hey. I thought you might like that back.

JAKE: ~taking it~ Thanks.

CASSIE: I borrowed it.

AX: Jake! Jake!

JAKE: ~like he can't believe it~ Is that Ax?

AX: ~running into room~ I have some important news. I have to show you something. I did it. ~chews something for a moment, then starts to blow a bubble gum bubble, it gets to be about half the size of his head when he stops. JAKE and CASSIE start giggling. AX pops the bubble with his hands, getting gum everywhere~ 

JAKE: Thank the universe for Andalites. Cassie, nothing has changed! We're still fighting the Yeerks! Don't you get it? This is amazing!

CASSIE: Jake, are you okay?

JAKE: ~looks from her to AX and back~ I couldn't be better.

TOBIAS: ~lands on windowsill~

JAKE: ~walks over, amazed~ Tobias! You're still a hawk! I love you as a hawk, you look good as a hawk!

TOBIAS: < Thanks...I think... >

MARCO: ~coming into room~ Jake, you're gushing over a bird. Didn't anyone tell you that flattery gets you no--

JAKE: ~interupting him~ Marco, you were right.

MARCO: ~puzzled~ I was?

JAKE: Yeah! We've got no choice but to fight the Yeerks.

MARCO: Shh! What's gotten into you?!

RACHEL: ~walks into the room~ 

JAKE: Marco, you're not a controller! We're not controllers. ~practically jumping up and down~None of us are controllers!

RACHEL: Would somebody stop him?

MARCO: ~tries to wrestle JAKE to the ground~ 

JAKE: ~laughing as MARCO starts shoving him~ Rachel, we're not controllers! ~RACHEL and CASSIE start to help MARCO get JAKE down onto the bed and shut him up~

JAKE VO: How do you define happiness? By having friends like these. Friends who have stuck with me in this fight. We're together and I wouldn't have it any other way.


VERY good episode. They really need to do more original episodes, they turn out so much better than when they try and follow the books. To put it bluntly, the show sucks when they follow the books. Not that it's that great anyways, but you all know what I mean :-)

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