Clod

DESCRIPTION: Members of this kit are not part of a "group" in any normal sense. Some individuals are unusually strong and stupid. They blunder around life, taking things when they need them. Their thief abilities are significantly modified in form, though not in result. This character is a sort of "duh, gee George, sure I canna open da puny little box for ya" type. They are invariably large and overweight for their race.

ABILITY REQUIREMENTS: Strength must be at least 15, Dexterity must be no GREATER than 16, and both Intelligence and Wisdom must be less than 11. Members of this kit are permitted extraordinary strength up to 18/50 (roll d%; on a 01-50, STR = 18; on a 51-00, STR = 18/01-50).

ROLE: See description. Imagine a cross between the Abominable Snowman from the old Warner Brothers Bugs Bunny/Daffy duck cartoon and the classic thief.

WEAPON PROFICIENCIES: These thieves can use any inelegant weapon. Mostly this means clubs, saps, punching, wrestling, axes, etc. No rapiers, bows, martial arts, etc. They may specialize in punching and wrestling (only).

NONWEAPON PROFICIENCIES: The whole point of this kit is rather antithetical to being highly skilled. No bonus or require proficiencies. All proficiencies for which Intelligence is the relevant ability cost an ADDED penalty of one slot.

MODIFICATION TO THIEF ABILITIES: Members of this kit lose some abilities outright, gain a few in exchange, and have the rest altered noticeably. They lose the ability to Find Traps, Move Silently, Hide in Shadows, Detect Noise, Climb Walls, and Read Languages totally. The following abilities are changed:

PICK POCKETS: This ability is no longer the sly purloining of coins or pouches from an unknowing victim. Instead, it
represents an irresistible "grabbing" of the object. Its chance of success is the same as for the normal ability, but there are some differences. First, whether successful or not the attempt is totally obvious. Unless dead, the target will notice. If the thief tries to "pick" a pouch hanging from the victim's belt, success means that the whole pouch was ripped off, the attaching thongs torn. If the thief tries for something in a pocket, he shoves a big meaty hand inside and grabs everything he can, most likely tearing the pocket off in the bargain. Ability modifiers: (STR, not DEX, applies)

STR SCORE: MODIFIER: RACE: MODIFIER:

15 0 Human 0

16 0 Gnome -5%

17 +5% Halfling -5%

18 +10% Dwarf 0

18/01-50 +15%

If the victim is holding the item to be "picked," the following modifiers apply: Strength of opponent = same penalty as the thief would get as a bonus, above; Held with two hands = -15%. If the held object is a weapon, the victim gets a free attack against the thief. If that attack hits, the "pick" attempt automatically fails.

OPEN LOCKS: This skill is simply the opening of locked objects through the creative use of force. Special tools are normally required to open locks effectively. Members of this kit don't use any of those wimpy-ass girlie-tools that normal thieves do, though. Crowbars, sledgehammers, big rocks, and spiked clubs are frequently used. This method has advantages and disadvantages over the normal method. Normal traps like poisoned needles in locks and contact poison just don't do anything to the thief, obviously. Moreover, an attempt takes a mere round (spent smashing, prying, and gouging the offending closure). The problem is that most objects are too, er, delicate to handle this sort of treatment. Generally, if the DM thinks the locked object (or its contents, if a chest or box) is liable to be broken by the mistreatment of the lock, s/he should have it save versus the blow. Strong items like solid steel doors need not save at all. Large chests and strong wood doors might save vs. normal blow, perhaps at a bonus. Ivory coffers and crystal boxes would need to save vs. crushing blow at a penalty. Noise is also a drawback of this method. Ability modifiers (relevant ability is STR):

STR SCORE: MODIFIER: RACE: MODIFIER: OPEN LOCKS

15 0 Human 0

16 +5% Gnome 0

17 +10% Halfling 0

18 +15% Dwarf +5%

18/01-50 +20%

With normal lock picking, the DM can assign bonuses or penalties depending on the quality of the lock. The same may be done here. The thief may try again to open a lock on a later round (if the noise doesn't attract someone before then, or the punishment break the closure outright, making it moot) at a cumulative penalty of -10% per round. (The damage tends to jam & fuse the lock in place.)

REMOVE TRAPS: Not dissimilar to Open Locks. These thieves couldn't FIND a trap on their own if their life depended on it. But if a friend points one out, the thief can "remove" it quite effectively. The technique is essentially that of catastrophically setting it off. As above, a few "tools" are needed. If the roll is successful, the thief sets the trap off, causing it to fail/jam/whatever. The thief NEVER takes damage from the trap if his roll is successful; if damage would normally be unavoidable, the result for the thief should be mostly cosmetic (e.g. if a fireball is set off in the room, the thief should lose one to three hit points and have his face and body comically blackened). Other party members need by no means get off this easily. If they happen to be standing in the wrong place when the trap is set off, too bad for them. This skill applies both for mechanical and magical traps, though magical traps cause a -10% penalty to the roll. There are no ability modifiers for this skill. Failure sets the trap off automatically; and, if the thief CAN be affected by it, he automatically is.New Thief Abilities:

MOVE UNSTOPPABLY: As was mentioned earlier, every member of this kit is large and overweight. These thieves possess an uncanny skill to barge through obstacles with little or no harm to themselves. This skill is usually invoked either (1) while frantically making for the exit or (2) while mindlessly trying to get hold of something interesting. If used successfully, intervening objects will be knocked over, spilled, scattered, stomped on, jostled, or otherwise disturbed in the most chaotic, noisy way possible. There are four basic types of obstacle this thief needs to worry about:
(1) "Huh? Did I hit something?" A single chair. A shorter humanoid. Something minor like that. +10%.

(2) "Oooff!" A dining room set. A few people gossiping in a group. A bunch or barrels. A single much bigger humanoid. A short picket fence. A thick hedge. +/- 0%.

(3) "Oww!" A plaster wall. A small group of militiamen. A big fence. -20%.

(4) "...." A stone wall. A bunch of nasty dudes bigger than the thief. A Blade Barrier spell. The roll cannot succeed unless the thief has funny magical stuff to allow it.

The thief moves at full normal movement through the area for up to a round or until the DM deems that he must stop or roll again. The path behind the thief is open for other party members to use. If the thief attempts to Move Unstoppably through one or more armed entities, that's OK. If he succeeds, the victims must each save vs. DEX or fall to the ground. Even if they retain their footing, they attack and defend at -2 for 1-6 segments. If he fails, each of the intended victims can attack the thief as he passes.

STR SCORE: MODIFIER: RACE: MODIFIER:

15 0 Human 0

16 0 Gnome -20%

17 +5% Halfling -25%

18 +10% Dwarf -10%

18/01-50 +15%

THUMP: Thieves of this kit do not get the "backstab" ability per se. Instead, they gain the ability to "thump" a surprised opponent on the noggin. The thief may use any proficient blunt weapon. If the victim is wearing armor, s/he is assumed to be wearing a helmet unless there is some reason to think otherwise. A "thump" will be only a normal called shot to the head if the opponent is not surprised. Modifiers:Thief is 1 foot or more taller than victim: +1 to hit Thief is 1 foot or more shorter than victim: -1 to hit AC, helmet worn: normal AC of opponent AC, no helmet: AC = 8 (modified by magic but not DEX since the opponent is by definition surprised) Plus all normal bonuses for attacking from behind, etc., if applicable A successful hit does normal damage PLUS: At levels 1-4: double this amount as temporary damage At levels 5-8: x3 as temporary damage

At levels 9-12: x4 as temporary damage

At levels 13+: x5 as temporary damage

This temporary damage wears off normally. Note also that all this damage goes to the head if you are using the optional "stunned" and "useless" table from the Complete Fighter's Handbook.

SKILL: BASE SCORE:

Pick Pockets 25%

Open Locks 15%

Remove Traps 10%

Move Unstoppably 10%

At level one the thief gets 40 discretionary points. Every level thereafter he gets 20. No ability may be raised above 95%.

SPECIAL BENEFITS: In order to live long enough to reach adulthood, all people as dorky as those in this kit have to have a sizeable stock of lick. This may be handled in two ways.

(1) Every time the thief sets off some kind of disaster by using one of his 4 special skills (not thump) and would be imperiled in some way not previously mentioned, he can attempt a saving throw vs. breath weapon. Success means that he avoids danger is some comical, near-miraculous way.

(2) The other way is for the DM to decide when the PC/NPC has acted particularly true to his kit & that it would be good for morale/comedic relief/encouragement to allow the player a save as above to avoid danger.

SPECIAL HINDRANCES: Duh, need one comment on this? They are constantly blundering into dangerous situations and relying on the cleverness of friends. They are slow and dimwitted, with all the disadvantages that normally accompany that failing.



RACES: Most thieves in this kit are human, though other races are represented. Elves may not participate in this kit. Interestingly, NPC giants, trolls, and other large humanoid groups have few thieves NOT members of this kit.


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