I work for a company whose clients are catalog companies, tv ads and suppliers (from office to diabetic supplies). I answer phones and take orders, catalog requests, and *cringe* customer service.

It is not common knowledge that companies do this. People just assume that when they call to order something that the TSR they're speaking with works in the same building where the company and warehouse are both located, and that the TSR is the person responsible for them not receiving their STUPID, WORTHLESS, junk that they wanted for Christmas!!!!

Well I am sorry to disappoint those annoying, mean, self-centered inhuman beings that that is not the case. Period.

When they call to order something or to inquire about an ad on TV, they are going to get me, a person who works for a company that works for that company. And do you know what? I don't care if they feel cheated or jipped or that they are "NEVER GOING TO ORDER FROM THIS COMPANY AGAIN!!" Like I really care!!!

If I say that "I am very sorry ma'am or sir, but I am unable to help you" it means that I am very sorry but I am unable to help you, my supervisor is unable to help you, and you need to call the number I give you or shut up and deal with it!!!!!

Do not yell at me. Do not cuss at me. Do not expect me to magically know everything about you or your order! And do not expect me to want to hear your WHOLE LIFE STORY, et al.

Do not complain to me when I tell you the customer service hours... Hello, if they company is located in CA, then the office hours are most likely going to be PACIFIC STANDARD TIME... whether or not it is an inconvenience to you!

And remember that my company has 'centers' all over the country working for that company amung many, many, many others, and that we are not located in the same state or town as those companies... we just have to pretend that we are, so don't ask how the weather is... We HAVE to lie to you.

And I am here kvetching right now because I need to kvetch, it is my turn to yell, here, on MY website, because if I said to you over the telephone what I am saying now, I would lose my job.

So, I beg you, when you must place a call, have some consideration. You are not the only person to complain to me today, and it is (probably) not my fault... so do not yell at me, do not cuss at me, and do not accuse me of being unwilling to help you. NOW. Thank you- I think... I am still pretty mad.

After a time of inactivety I am back to spew my awkward thoughts on the world, if it's even listening. Over the past year I have been a depressed, web graphics creator and a student.

A student of what? I am twenty-five stinking years old and I still can't decide on what I want to be when I grow up. All I know right now is that I have to write!

There is something growing inside of me and it is hurling through me like a volcano, surging to my core essence, bringing it forth to this shell of who I am.

I can remember to wash my face day and night now, yet I forget to breathe. I take my happy pills everynight, I go to class, do my math homework and still I don't know what is real.

I am mean. I can remember to live now but am forgetting how to be nice again. So I ask, is this living?