Because the emotional gulf wasn't gonna go away overnight,I really didn't see how my life was any different,here and now,than it would be in the foster home. Due to the need to send off a reply as soon as possible to my uncle,to thank him for the photo of my brother and sister,I left part of my dinner uneaten. When Aunt Constance showed up at eight to collect the dirty dishes so she could take care of them tonight,she wasn't thrilled by the fact that there was still food left on my plate,and that I was in the exact same position as when she brought the tray. She allowed her hurt over my actions from earlier to get the better of her,by lashing out at me. Rather than wait for me to explain to her that I would do as I had done once before,finish the meal at lunch tomorrow,she reminded me that in THIS house we did not waste food or the money which bought said food. When she was done,I looked at my aunt in a different way for a moment or two.
Instead of seeing her as the aunt she was,I saw her as the lady who was partially running the foster home,and I also imagined myself in a different role,due to my aunt and her anger,and my anger which was starting to take hold of me. I saw myself as only one of several people who were providing an income for the lady and her husband who adopted kids like me. Armed with that view of the situation,I all but jumped off the bed and stood toe to toe with my aunt. While I was doing that,I told her what was bugging ME,I told her that I would appreciate it if she would treat me as if I were a niece,not someone who was living in a hotel or some foster home,two places I would be thrown out of if I didn't follow all the house rules. When I finished,rather than calm down,my aunt became even more mad at me. Because of how I had just smarted off to her,Aunt Constance felt a refresher course in respecting my elders was necessary. In short,she blistered my behind. Once that was done,the two of us called it a day. I went to bed,feeling ashamed of myself,and a bit upset that there was no momma here to comfort me and make me feel better. In short,I was hurting as much as what my aunt was. Unlike her,I doubted that I would be okay in the morning.
