An Ode to Tong

Wake up!!! We going Tong!!
I open my eyes,
I pull myself off the bed.
Tong??
YES TONG!!!

We park the car.. and walk to Fabric Land
To get cloth for shirts.
We buy one setta cloth.
Den for some reason we walk to ALLL the other fabric stores
Just so my mudda could say "See how cheap we get it in Fabric Land??"
Tong...

My mudda likes this material.. I doh like it
I like this material... my mudda doh like it.
"Datz pants cloth!" she says.
She turns to the attendant and asks "Ent this is pants cloth?"
"Yes" says the attendant.
I ask another attendant "Ent this is dress-shirt cloth?"
"Yes" says the attendant
Tong...

House of buttons!
Rows upon rows, shelves upon shelves of buttons!!
Containers, jugs, cups, mugs, jars FILLED to the brim with buttons!
Crowded... people frantically buying buttons.
I am the only male in the store.
Funny looks from people scampering for buttons?
Tong...

I walk down the street
Man tails me for 3 blocks looking slyly at my bags
Come I dare you!!
Come and feel the full frontal blow of 5 different kinds of fabric and 4 dozen buttons!!!!
He see me watching
And fades away.
Tong...

I walk down the street.
"Hoss... gih meh ah schilling nah so I could buy a KFC"
I look into his cup...
"With that money u could buy 3 or 4 doubles right down the road" I say
"Fuk you" he says.
"Laterz" I say
Tong...

What a place