Quote List for the Faire Trip on Sat. May 23rd 1998


This includes the day of the trip and the night before.

Those Present on Friday and Saturday:
Monica, Raven, Christy, Mike, Morgan, Bonnie, Andy, and Jenny.


This quote list is dedicated to Andrew, who was cursed for his birthday, and got sick Friday night, causing him to miss Faire. We missed ya, Sweetie!
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Re: Monica's newest ceramic project.

Monica: "Want to see my mermaid?"

Andy (suggestively): "Yeah, I wanna see your mermaid."

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When Conversations Collide:

Raven : (Describing a vast amount of chocolate.) "Ah, what was that phase I heard last night... Chocolate ... something. I think it started with a 'c'. Chocolate Corpulence? Nah."

Morgan: Chocolate Opulence?

Mike: Chocolate...

Monica: (In other conversation) ...monkey sex.

Mike: Chocolate Monkey Sex??

Monica : (Still in other conversation, I think) You know, I think that was on Jerry Springer today.

Mike: (confused and skeptical) Chocolate Monkey Sex?!

[It was Chocolate Decadence, BTW]

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From Monica upon her first catching sight of a bowl of Fruit Loops around 1am:

Oooh, I need some of that! (said in the same tone of voice one might use upon seeing David Duchovny in a red speedo)

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Christy to Andrew (who was under a blanket at the time):

Are you naked under that?

Give me a minute, I could be.

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Raven: Come on Jenny. Open up that orange and get going, Baby.

Jenny: I'm coming.

All: Stunned silence

Then All at once: "Wow!" "Hey!" "I need some of that!" "Saaaaaay!" "Pass some of that orange this way!" 'Don't Bogart that orange, Jenny!"

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At Various Points (from various people):

Pants, pants, sing the praises of pants...

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Christy: What are you writing?

Raven: The quote list. Anything you say can and will be used against you in an on-line forum.

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Andy to Jenny:

You need more sexual innuendo in your life.

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Bonnie to Christy Re: Her strange inverted knee trick:

"That must have hurt... Do it again!"

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Overheard:

"Erotic is using a feather, Kinky is using the whole damn chicken."

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Doug (as told by Christy, re: Bareback horse-ridding and dismounts.):

"That's not an "Indian Dismount". That's a "Nut-crunching Dismount".

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Christy re: a bitter comment made by Bonnie: "F**king Turner's Syndrome"? That must be a new strain.

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Monica to Christy re: Andy (who was still under a blanket): Is he naked under that?

Andy: Not yet! :)

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Bonnie: If anyone hears Monica's midnight mumbling, wake me up. I want to hear it.

Monica: You know, Bene Gesserits can burst your internal organs with just their voices.

Bonnie: So is that why my side hurts?

**********

Andy: There's a lot you can do under a blanket.

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Raven: So, Jenny's asleep. Let's put her bra in the freezer.

Jenny: :::flashes Raven "The Bird":::

Raven: Okay, so, maybe she's not asleep.

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Raven: So what are you guys doing up there on that couch?

Andy: Yeah, good question.

Morgan: Oh, yeah, right. As if my life were that interesting!

Mike: :::Makes pounding noises on the couch.:::

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Raven: :::Messing with her braid::: Aggh! This thing's got ahold of the little hairs on the back of my neck.

Mike: Oww!

Jenny: Ohh!

Mike: Ow Jenny: Oh

mike: ow jenny:oh mike&jenny: owoh mike&jenny: Owwohwho.

Raven: Uh, guys, you're starting to sound like that's not hurting...

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Re: The sickness (3am)

Morgan: Oh Sh*t, Was that Andrew?

Someone Else: Ohhh, F**k

Jenny: I think he's sick

Morgan: (sarcastically) Really, ya think??

Andrew: Uggh, I think I missed the toilet.

All: Uggghhhh!

Raven: Hang on ... Where do you keep your cleaning stuff?

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Re: The Sickness (4am)

:::As Andrew proceeds to spew on the floor:::

Morgan: Ughhh, not again, Damnit!

[Poor Andrew, we missed him so much. And he didn't get a chance to use the "Kiss me (Spank me...), it's my birthday!" line. Next year!]

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Monica (re: other drivers): Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

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Morgan: I had so much fun last night.

Monica: Yeah. Except for the puking.

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Morgan (re: Mike's Mountain Dew) : You know, if he keeps drinking this stuff, he's going to be infertile by the time he's 30.

Mike: Hey, give me that!

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Monica: Does something smell like it's burning to you guys?

:::Everyone pauses and checks:::

Raven: Morgan, are you on fire again?

Mike: No that's me, I'm just so hot.

Morgan: No, damnit.

Monica: Oh. Well, maybe I'm just experiencing sensory hallucinations.

**********

Morgan and Mike flip out in the backseat.

Monica: Damn, Hey, What the? What's going on back there?

Mike :::points to the motorcycles that just passed us.::: : Want one!

Monica: Oh, Okay, I just though that you guys had developed spontaneous Tourrette's syndrome or something... :::Twitches and flails::: agghghhghrhgh.

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Christy (re: Sympathy for the Devil song on the radio) : Oh COME ON! End the song already! Quit F-ing around and end the song!

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Mike (re: sex in Anime: No man, bad idea. That's the last thing you want to see. There's nothing worse than when a cartoon scores more than you do!

Monica : Dear Japan, You may want to re-think having a blonde, mini-skirted, pre-pubescent little girl as your national hero. Maybe it's just me but Anime looks like a genetic experiment mixing humans and greys.

**********

:::Morgan adjusts her sleeves.:::

Raven: Yeah, get those shoulders out there.

Morgan: I still have bodice tan from last time.

Raven: Yeah, your shoulders *do* look rather tan.

Morgan: That's because I wear all these sleeveless sweaters all the time. But the rest of me is still pasty assed, butt-white pale. I look like someone smeared glue all over my skin.

Raven: Butt-white pale, a new shade of white. Coming soon to a Crayola box near you.

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:::Mike does the 'hand jive' to Celine Dion's "Mislead":::

Raven: You make your own fun, don't you Mike?

Mike: Yup. < grin >

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Monica (on Baby Carrots) : Where I used to work there was this kid who wouldn't eat anything but the orange baby foods. You know, carrots and yams. He ate so many of them that his skin acquired this orange-ish/ yellow tinge. It was so cool!

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Monica: There's nothing sadder than a gut shot fawn.

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Christy (re: the toll lanes) : Look at those Bastards! They've got three empty lanes over there. They're flying by us and laughing. They're mocking us with their empty lanes.

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Raven: Hey you guys want to freak out the people in the car next to us? Let's all turn and wave.

:::Then suddenly the traffic in our lane comes to a complete stop, causing Christy to slam the brakes.:::

Morgan: Or maybe not.

Monica (coughing): Great. Now that I've inhaled my carrot...

**********

Christy: Goddamnit!

Raven: Hi, All god's lines are busy-

All: Shut Up!

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Christy: Morgan has nice perky breasts.

Raven: Oh, Just what every woman wants to be called. "Perky"

Morgan: That's the last adjective I'd ever use to describe myself.

**********

At a show at Ren Faire:

Manly Men ( in Tights): Big dogs don't sniff butts.

(Still at the show)

The Spaniard: Your eyes are like limping poodles. Tonight I will be your sausage boy of love.

Captain Glover: I think that looses something in the translation.

**********

Morgan (on Mike's Katana) : Jeeze, you're walking like you've got a sword up your as*!

Monica: Well, he kinda *does.*

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Raven (to the man she saw kissing :::Ahem::: KISS-ING Jenny, when she turned around from buying chocolate.) : You be good to her.

The Man: All I can promise is that I'll be good. ::: devilish grin :::

Raven: That's all I can ask. ::: grin of her own :::

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Raven (inside a privy [ read: Port-a-potty].) Aghh! Goddamnit! Arhghhgh! ::: Jumps up and down, her three belts of bells jingle merrily::: Aghhrrrgh! Damn things! F'ing ....

[Dialogue degenerated to various foul curses]

Male Voice from the Privy Next to Her : Are you okay in there?

Raven: No! I can't get my pants off!

Voice (amused) : What a horrible thing to have happen.

Raven: They're stuck in my bells. (More hopping and cursing)

Voice: Do you need some help?

Raven: YES!! [Various curses - Raven has a potty mouth]

Voice (a minute or so latter.) Do you still need help?

Raven: Yes, I'm stuck in my pants and I have to go pee!!!

:::There's a knock on the door of her privy:::

Voice: It's me!

Raven: Thank God! (Swings open the door, turns around and points to the problem) I'm stuck! The bells are looped into the fabric of my pants, can you get it undone???

Man (rather good looking man, I might add): Yup. (unhooks pants.) There you go!

Raven: Oh Thank you! (Gives him a quick peck, slams the door.)


Acknowledgements:
Idea for this page was inspired by the qoute-list page of The Sunnydale Slayers


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