The Nirvana Story
Kurt Cobain
The front man of this band was Kurt Cobain. He was born 02.20.67 in the tiny town of Hoquam. He and his family moved not long after his birth to Aberdeen, Washington. Kurt had a happy childhood although he had a very bad health. He had narcolepsy, trouble with his lungs and trouble with his stomach. He was very happy until his parents divorced when Kurt was 7 years old. His mother, Wendy, later said: "It just destroyed his life. He changed completely. He just held everything in and he became really shy. I think he was ashamed." After the divorce, Kurt was send around to live with aunts, uncles, grandparents and his father, Don. When he was at his father's home, he started to find a direction for his life. He could sit for hours, just listening to rockacts like Aerosmith, Led Zeppelin and Black Sabbath. He also liked the Beatles. His father wanted Kurt to play baseball, but Kurt sabotaged the play and became mighty unpopular among his ambitious 'baseball - buddies'. But Kurt came to know two boys, Scott and Andy, who played guitar and bass in a band. Kurt wanted also to play in a band. He got to know Matt Lukin who at the time played bass in the local band The Melvins. The Melvins was one of Kurts favorite bands, and he once tried to become a part of the band. But Buzz Osbourne, the singer of The Melvins, introduced Kurt to punk. Kurt was facinated of Henry Rollings of Black Flag. He wanted to sing just like that! Kurt was never a fan of the educationalsystem, and he quitted in 1985.The Sellouts
It was about this time Kurt joined his first band, the Sellouts. They played covers of Creedence Clearwater Revival and Led Zeppelin. Kurt played drums and sang. Kurt: "I always wanted to play drums. Ever since I got my first Beatles record I wanted to play drums. I never wanted to be a front man. I jsut wanted to sit back there and play rums, but till be a rock star." The Sellouts didn't last for long, and before Kurt was out of school, they were history. Kurt had some different jobs at the time that didn't just pay for the small apartment he rented, but also Kurts habit of taking drugs. At this time, Led Zeppelin was Kurts favorite band. Kurt: "I always used to getting stoned and start to fall asleep listening to Led Zeppelin, and by the time the last track came on, the very quiet one, I'd be in, like a dreamy state."Nirvana
Kurt lost his apartment. He found himself sleeping at friends' apartment floors. He made some grafitti. Soon he came in touch with a group of people who changed his taste of music. He was drawn to groups like the Clash, the Sex Pistols and the like. Kurt was introduced to Chris Novoselic through Buzz Osbourne. Chris had attended the same school as Kurt, but the two had never actually met before. Kurt gave Chris a demo of himself and asked if Chris wanted to join Kurt in a band. Their first band's name was Skid Row and they played covers. On drums was Bob McFadden. Kurt: "We played 'em live! in a room! It was amazing! It was the most incredible thing I've ever done!" They used to rehearse over Chris' moms beauty salon. McFadden didn't last long and the name Skid Row was soon replaced with Nirvana...Chris Novoselic
Chris was born 05.16.65 in California, but when Chris was 14, they moved to Aberdeen. He joined Kurt first in Skid Row and later in Nirvana only because Kurt stalked him until he said that he would join. Chris was the one to come up with the idea of recording Nirvana's first single "Love Buzz" of the dutch band Shocking Blue. Kurt wasn't that enthusiastic, but said ok, let's do it. At that time Kurt and Chris lived in a tiny apartment in Olympia, Washington with their girlfriends. They didn't have much money, but great enthusiasm. Nirvana's debut album, Bleach is released in june 1988. Most of the record is much lo-fi as their heroes in Sonic Youth. This first serious recording took place at Seattle's Reciprocal Studio, and it was produced by the all ready legendaric Jack Endino. Most of the recordings were one take, and Bleach was recorded and mixed in just 30 hours. Kurt: "We were into this experimental, noisy sound (...). We did feel a little bit intimidated, a little bit of pressure from the whole Seattle scene, because everyone was so heavily into this retro '70". There are also changes in the group. They hire a new guitarist, Jason Everman. He plays on Bleach, but is kicked out a few months after. The drummer, Dale Grover pulls out of the goup because he is about to move to San Fransisco. Grover says that Dave Foster is a good replacement, but neither Kurt nor Chris likes his machoimage or mustache, and he is soon after replaced with Chad Channing. They have a short Europe-tour with TAD. In december 1989 Chris and his girlfriend Shelli gets married in Tacoma. Kurt Cobain read alot and was inspired by everyone from Jack Kerouac to Alexander Solsjenitsyn. He was a great fan of Black Sabbath, but he was also facinated by the Beatles, and wanted to make a hybrid of those two.Dave Grohl
David Grohl was born 01.14.69 in Warren, Ohio. His musical carreer started when he was assigned to play drums in the legendaric punkband "Scream". When Scream broke up, he got in touch with Kurt and Chris, who needed a new drummer. Kurt: "For a long time we were happy with Chad's drumming. I meen, he has his own unique style who's appropirate for a lot of the songs that we wrote, but not what we wanted to do at the time. We wanted to move into a more pop-world, and our styles just didn't fit." Kurt was a difficult person to work with, and he demanded much of his fellow bandmembers. Especially the drummers. But Kurt liked Chris and Dave not just as colleagues but also as buddies. Kurt: "It has been fun to be around and it has been great to tour with them. They also rounds off the sound - and that's the most important." But Kurt didn't like it when the other two bandmembers gave Kurt suggestions to lyrics and music. Kurt gave in once, and out of it came the song 'Scentless Appretice' on the album In Utero.Nevermind
Kurt, Chris and Dave wanted to move over to a bigger company. Kurt wanted to sign with Geffen. So Geffen was the final choice. Many of the old fans was critical to what they ment was a sell-out from Nirvana. Well, Kurt, Chris and Dave wanted to make more money and it would also be nice if their records was avaliable over the whole country. That was made easier with a big company. Noone knew what direction Nirvana would take musically. Kurt was fed up with the rawness on 'Bleach' already. With Butch Wig as the producer, they started the recording of the bands second album in Van Nuys in California. The expectations wasn't great. They hoped to sell 100 000 albums over time. In September 1991 was Nevermind released, and noone knew what was going to happen. Kurt: "Everybody sensed that the album was going to be pretty well. There were a feeling in the air that something new was happening. Noone could pinpoint it, but we knew we were a part of it." The first indications came with the single 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'. Chris: "I remember when we put that song together, we looked at eachother saying 'It is a Pixies ripp-off, isn't it?' We thought it was bigger hits on that record, like 'Lithium' and 'In Bloom'. And so we recorded 'Teen Spirit', and I remember Kurt putting the vocals down, and the next day I walk into the studio, Butch said 'Guys you gotta listen to this!' He had made a rough mix of it. He had just crancked it. 'Wow, this really rocks!' It was a rocking song, very powerful. And it turned everything upside down." A local radiostation discovered the single 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' and so MTV discovered the video. Less than a month after the release everybody knew who Nirvana was. Four months after the realese, 70 000 copies of 'Nevermind' was sold every day! 'Nevermind' went straigt to the top! In january 1992, there was sold over four milion copies!Success?
Noone had ever seen such a success before. Dave: "If you deep down never expected any of this to happen, when it actually happens, you look at it as a...a kind of...joke! Like it's pretty funny when you look at it." But in the very start of their world tour, the problems started. Kurt had started taking heroin. His stomach had never been as it should have been, but all the stress and the pressure, made it much worse. Kurt: "I was in pain. -I was in pain for so long that I didn't care if I was in the band, I didn't care if I was alive. And it so happended that I came to that conclution at the time when my band became very poplular. it had been going on and bellying up for so many years that I was, you know, suicidal. I just didn't want to live. I just thought: 'If I'm going to die, if I'm gonna kill myself, I should take some drugs.' You know. That's why I became a junkie, because I felt like a junkie everyday. Being on tour just made it worse." In february '92 Kurt and his girlfriend, Courtney Love, got married in Hawaii. The rumors wouldn't stop. Nirvana was to break up, Courtney abused heroin while pregnant, Kurt overdosed every second week, and once he was killed in a carcrash! There were no limits! At the same time, on the musical level, Nirvana released a collection of b-sides and outtakes under the name 'Incesticide'.In Utero
After they had ended their worldtour and the birth of Kurt's daughter Frances Bean in august 1992, the band took a vacation. When the article in 'Vanety Fair' came out, suggesting Courtney's heroin abuse, Frances was put in a new home. Kurt loved his daughter and fought viciously for her. Kurt and Courtney told the female reporter to show some evidence that Courtney had said she had used heroin. She couldn't do it. After a month they could take their daughter home once again. Kurt: "The woman from 'Vanety Fair' came into our house with an agenda. She knew exactly what kind of article she was going to write..." Krist: "When she was born, it was like the beginning of taking us out of the slum, because she was like this beam of optimism that came out. It was all kinds of wired stuff going on. So was this baby born, and I think, it was like womething really, really positive that came out of some hard times. It was a blessing, and I was really glad to see her there, and everybody was. Kurt and Courtney were proud parents and it was really good. It was the best thing that could have happended." Kurt was getting more and more addicted to Courtney and heroin. Kurt hated himself and he hated 'grunge'. But he and his buddies in Nirvana finished their third album - In Utero. Many was sceptical to the new album. Krist: "It was this story that our record was unlistenable, unreleaseable and unwhatever." The producer, Steve Albini, had gone out to the media and said that he seriously doubted that the record would be released. But The three buddies liked Albinis sound. Kurt: "The first song we recorded and listended back to, we said 'Yep, okay, that's his sound, that's what we want.' It is a trademark sound, but I personally have had this sound in my head since we've had this band going, I wanted that kind of sound. -Cause it sounds so natural and real." The album was darker and more depressing than 'Nevermind'. Dave: "Before our record (Nevermind) came out on top ten, it was like Whitney Huston, and there were no rockband on top ten. No important band, whatever that means...So it really took a while - like a year and a half or more after everything had happened that I really realized like - Wow, I guess that we really did make a difference...People wanted to love it (In Utero) or they wanted to hate it way before it came out. I knew it. It would never do what 'Nevermind' did...No way...'Cause it's another scene now..." The production of the album and the fact that they had to bring their own PA on tour, made Nirvana do conserts in big halls, not in small clubvenues as they were used to. Kurt's facination with the rock myth had long since vanished and all he wanted was to be home with his little family. Kurt didn't manage to be a famous person. He hated to be recognised and he identified with John Lennon.The Tragedy
The situasion was spinning out of control. When Kurt and Courtney was relaxing in Rome, Courtney found Kurt unconcious and only her fast reaction saved his life. He had taken tranqulizers and had also drunk a lot. But it was probably not a suicide attempt, since they found no suicide letter. Another time had Kurt locked himself up in the bathroom, threatening to kill himself. He came unharmed from that incident. But noone was prepared for the news that came early on the morning April 8 1994. Kurt was dead. He had escaped from a de-tox clinic in LA, gone home to his and Courtney's home, and shot himself. He had then been dead for three days. Besides the dead Cobain, the police found his drivers licence, the album In Utero and a suicideletter. At the bottom of the letter was Kurts final words to his daughter:I love you, I love you
...I haven't felt the excitement of listening to as well as creating music, along with really writing something, for too many years now. I feel guilt beyond words about these things - for example, when we are backstage and the lights go out and the manic roar from the crowd begins, it doesn't affect me the way it did for Freddie Mercury, who seemed to love and releish in the love and adoration from the crowd which is something that I totally admire and envy. The fact is that I can't fool you, anyone of you. It simply isn't fair to you or to me. The worst crime I could think of would be to pull people off by faking I've having 100% fun. I had it good, very good, and I'm grateful, but since the age of seven I've become hateful towards all humans in general, only because it seems so easy for people to get along that have empathy only because I love and feel for people too much, I guess. Thank you all from my pit of my bruning nauseous stomach for your letters and concearn during the last years. I'm too much of an erratic, moody person and I don't have the passion anymore.
Peace, love, empathy - Kurt Cobain
'The Nirvana Story' (c) copyright 1996 Eris Eurayle
