Methodical Madness



Sadly, Methodical Madness 1 is lost to us all. It's rather like the Holy Grail or something... you know that it exists somewhere but you can't for the life of you figure out where...

Methodical Madness 2 -
Yoda is the bomb. There really isn't any sense in arguing about it either because there's really no two ways about it. Popsicle sticks are the key to the universe ... it really is such a shame that we can't find the ignition. Pajamas with feet are the best kind of all. Dust bunnies are your friends. Mushrooms have always been and always will be evil. Do not question the importance of twisty ties. Their worth shall be demonstrated in due course and you'll be grateful you never doubted their supreme wonder. Don't cry for the plight of the chickens of the world. There's nothing to be done for them, sad as that be. Always have a fine line you will never cross. Move it around now and then just to confuse people. May we never forget the glorious wonders of cheese. For the last time, anime is not porn. You weak-minded individuals who have thought this must be severely chastised for your impudence. The audacity of it all... really people. If you don't understand what a goofchicken is, I'm sorry, my friend, you probably never will. Anyone can invent new words. All it takes is a dyslexic mind and a tongue that can't move quite fast to keep up with one's incessant rambling. Feeling squinty around edges has nothing to do with eyesight, silly woobleheads. Love is over-rated. As is caviar. In the same token, déjà vu is a curious sort of craziness. The wonders of pudding cups never cease. Fluffy pillows are a happiness. Multiple fluffy pillows are a grand happiness. Love never comes simpler than a triangle... sometimes it makes really nifty looking stars. ...And remember, 'Amy's goin' on safari...'

Methodical Madness 3 -
Fluffy pillows can be used for nearly anything. They're truly much too versatile for their own good. Make sure you do at least one thing a day to confuse people. It keeps them on their toes. And, as a plus, they might spin in circles which is always delightfully fun to watch. Tragic reindeer are your friends, but avoid rogue elephants at all costs. Under no circumstances are staplers to be trusted. 2-ply is a gift from God. The twisty ties of the world are gathering.* Beware. If it comes to all out war my only advice to you is please, for the love of all that is decent, keep the toilet seat down. Donuts are not to be trusted. Goofchickens, do try to remember that woobleheads are your friends. Don't let your piddly, petty differences blind you from the wonder that is wooble. Sporks are a dormant alien race. It is best to treat them with respect. Bunny slippers will take your far in society. Déjà vu is… wait, no... Safaris can be taken anytime, anywhere.* Cotton balls know the truth. Q-tips are clueless. Sugar is the spice.

Any general comments, compliments, complaints, hate mail, spam, declarations of undying love, gifts of sugar, and/or donations for a loverly vacation to the mental hospital can be sent right back here to this address. True story. 1