I'm a young man in search of what makes life complete and worthwhile. Trying to accomplish dreams and discover new ones. Meet personal goals and push the bar higher for future initiatives. A converted believer to the ideas that 1: its never to late no matter what the circumstances and 2: never hold back because the things you didn't do are the ones you regret, not the ones you did. I feel that the only true bonds that one can have in life are the ones that can be broken or damaged AND rebuilt again. How else can a relationship between any two people (friends, family, lovers, or any possibility) grow with out some conflict to build. It was as once said that you cannot have great achievement without a tremendous downfall, otherwise you would miss the ultimate goal that you are in search of.

How does one percieve what true friendship really is? Well this man believes that true friendship is something that can endure the distnace and time between conversations, then pickup where you left off like it was the next day. True friendship is when you know you can call any time and know that the other person wont be pissed off even if its 4AM. True friendship is when your best friend doesn't sleep because he's waiting to hear from you after being told that you are trapped in Buffalo from a snowstorm (Thanks Andy). It's having that blind trust in someone whom you can toss yours keys to and know that they wouldnt let anything happen to you. It's friendship that forgets all the arguments and fights you ever had. It's those people who forgive you for the shit you did or didn't do, like lose to touch with over something you should have let go along time ago. To all those that have helped me in more ways then they will ever know. I'd rather name everyone but knowing me I'd fuck up and leave someone out. You all know who you are anyway. Peace.

Love. What a great power it can hold over people. I am one of the lucky who have been able to experience this in a life time. Although the person who I fell in love with no longer carries those feelings, I do. Up until a few weeks ago I thought that I had finally been able to place those feelings in a place in the back of my mind. I was able to remember the good times and than just carry on. Then a few events took place over a week and everything that I had worked so hard to tuck away had resurfaced to the front of my thoughts. Knowing the type of person that I am, I constructed many ideas about the what if's and why's. I had built ideas on how to remedy the situation and planned on taking a course of action to aquire the state of balance I had final reached prior. After many long hours of thinking to myself and conversations with friends, I discovered that everything I thought I needed was just the opposite. I knew the answers that I was looking for but refused to accept them. There was no sense in bringing back all the pain I went through the first time. There always comes time when that one piece of advice that you never knew would come into play although it had been in front of your eyes all this time. So on a final note its like the saying goes, "If something is your's let it go. If it comes back it was meant to be. If it doesn't then you never really had it anyway" And to a note to self and others, remember there isn't anything there about bringing it back. The more you try to pull it back the farther out of reach it gets, no matter how close it seems to be.