Chris stood in the open doorway and observed Vin's countenance and body movements as he moved around his office. The laceration and bruise that marked the left side of his forehead had just about faded out of existence, it had changed from an ugly purplish colour to a pale yellow that was now blending in with his flesh tone. The ex-bounty hunter's movements were still stiff, the badly bruised hip still seemed to be giving him trouble even though he constantly denied it. One small turn of the head exposed Chris's scrutiny of the younger man.

"I'm fine Chris. I keep telling you that but you won't listen to me." Vin smiled and kept his tone neutral, he knew Chris was concerned about his health.

"You sure?" For some reason Chris kept needing confirmation of what Vin just told him, he wasn't going to stop asking the same question until he was sure and as long as Vin moved with difficulty, he wasn't sure.

"I'm sure so why don't you go and bother someone else for a change and leave me alone to finish my report." Vin suggested.

"No one else to bother." Chris shrugged at him.

"What about Ezra?" Vin questioned him.

"Ezra said he was fine." Chris told him.

He had seen Ezra last week, the large laceration that adorned his right forehead was now clear of the fifteen stitches that were required to keep the skin together and help it heal. The bruising itself was still purple but like Vin's it was beginning to fade. The bruising that had covered most of his right ribcage was also healing, so were the three cracked ribs, Nathan had informed him of this. After Ezra was released from the hospital Nathan had voluntered to stay with him for a few days to make sure he was okay and at the end of that time period, which he referred to as a punishment, he stated that someone else could stay with the southerner the next time something happened. Nathan had been in a foul mood for a week afterwards but had never told anyone what had occured during those three days.

Chris hadn't seen any pain on Ezra's face when he spoke to him so he was satisfied that he was okay. What he didn't know was that Ezra hid the pain from him in the same way he was hiding it from everyone else, behind his calm facade.

"I told you that I was fine so why are you still bothering me?" Vin sat down in his chair so he could continue with the report that was due on Chris's desk before the end of the day. He grimaced at the pain that flared in his hip, it was only slight but still enough to cause the pain to show on his features.

"Because you don't look okay, and your still in pain." He knew he was right but it was more difficult getting Vin to admit it.

"Ezra's injuries were more serious than mine, go and nag him about his health." Vin began to type on his keyboard. "I won't have this report finished if you don't leave me alone."

"I'll check on you later."

Chris pushed himself away from the door and made his way down the hallway to the junction that would lead him to his own office. On an after thought he kept going until he reached the end of the corridor and the door that led to Ezra's office. He poked his head around the corner hoping not to be seen.

"Something I can do for you Mr Larabee?" Ezra asked in his soft southern drawl.

"You okay Ezra?" He watched as the handsome face appeared from behind the computer monitor, a small bandage still covered his head wound but the bruise peaked out from underneath.

"I am perfectly fine as I have already told you once before." Ezra lied to him.

Chris nodded. "Just checking Ezra." He turned away and walked to his own office.

Ezra waited for him to leave then opened the upper left hand draw of his desk. His trembling hand took out the packet of tylenol, he removed four and swallowed them with his coffee. His slender fingers found their way to the small gauge, he kept it on because he thought his associates would question his health if they saw the ugly wound, his mind kept thinking that if they didn't see it, they wouldn't ask. His strained eyes moved back to the monitor, he also needed to complete a report that Chris wanted last week.

After two hours Ezra pushed himself away from his desk in frustration, not only was his headache still bad but his side was beginning to cause him more pain, he had to keep twisting to check his neatly scribbled notes and his side was now paying the price for it's continuous movement. He needed a break, he decided to try and partake in the dreaded coffee that these men drank. Ezra stood up and took a deep breath, he regretted the expansion of his ribcage, the pain causing him to grit his teeth against the moan that wanted to express itself through sound.

Ezra walked slowly so he wouldn't aggravate his side or his head, he was about to enter the small kitchen when JD came rushing out, he ran straight into Ezra. The force of the collision knocked Ezra backwards and off his feet. He landed heavily and his head slammed against the carpeted floor.

"Ezra!" JD knelt down beside him and put his hand on his chest. "Ezra, I'm sorry. Are you okay?"

Ezra didn't move, he didn't want to move, his head felt like it had been split open. "I'm fine." It was only a whisper because he thought anything louder would cause his head to complain even more.

"I'll get Nathan!" JD ran from him leaving him lying in the middle of the corridor.

"NO!" Ezra gasped.

He tried to sit up but the only thing he managed to do was roll onto his right side, he groaned when all his weight fell on his bruised side. He rolled back to his original position. Ezra could hear footsteps and prepared himself for the inevitable.

"Ezra, you okay?" It was Nathan's voice.

"I'm fine!" He pushed the probing hands away.

"Then why are you still on the floor?" Nathan growled at him. He had lost his patience with the southerner and wasn't in the mood for his evasive answers.

"I just got the wind knocked out of me." Ezra lied once again, he wasn't going to tell him his head felt like it had been broken and his side was on fire.

"You sure?" Nathan began to loosen his tie.

"Of course I'm sure, I know how I feel, I don't need anyone to tell me!" Ezra retorted as he pushed Nathan's hands away.

"Fine, then you can take care of yourself." Nathan got up and left him where he was and walked away.

"What was that about Ezra?" JD asked him as he help him to his feet.

"Nothing JD, nothing important anyway." He began to walk back to his office when he remembered why he had left it in the first place. "JD, could you do something for me please." He saw JD's eager nod and his own head subconsciously felt the movement. "I need some coffee and . . . "

"Sure Ezra, I'll bring you some." It was the least he could do after sending Ezra to the floor.

Ezra didn't make it to his office, his designated path was blocked by Chris Larabee.

"Yes Mr Larabee?" Ezra thought he had seen what happened and was going to express his concern.

He smiled at the thought, the man hadn't actually showed him a lot of concern over the past few weeks. A question here, a visit there but that was all. As far as he knew he had spent all his time fussing over Vin. He didn't mind, he hated being looked after, that was why he had that heated argument with Nathan. The ex-army medic wouldn't leave him alone that first day, he had insisted on doing everything for him and Ezra didn't like it. He tried to tell Nathan he could look after himself but he wouldn't listen to him. By the third day Ezra had had enough, and made sure that Nathan knew it.

"Something funny?" Chris asked him.

"No." Ezra replaced the smile with his poker face, he also wanted to try and hide the pain he was feeling.

"Get the guys together would you Ezra. I want a meeting. We've got a new case coming up and I want to discuss it with everyone."

Ezra gave him his well known two finger salute and walked away. His first stop was going to be his office so he could supply his headache with some more tylenol.

Six men gathered around the large conference table, one member of the ATF team was missing. Chris looked around at the faces that waited for his angry words. He looked at Vin, and the physical damage on his left forehead. He looked away from him, his blue eyes glanced over at Ezra, he could only see his left profile so was unable to see his wound. The two men were lucky to be alive. He looked up at the door when he heard footsteps coming towards the room.

"Where the hell have you been?" Chris growled at Buck.

"Sorry Chris, security rang, said they had a package for you and that it was important." Buck explained as he walked through the door. "Thought I'd go down and get it for you." He walked forward and handed him a thick A4 sized envelope.

Chris looked at the yellow package, his name was clearly written in capital letters on the front, there was no address below his name. Someone had dropped it off. He turned it over and lifted the flap that had been sealed with sticky tape. His fingers gripped what was inside and pulled it out. Chris looked down at the top black and white photo, the members of team seven were grouped together outside of Inez's Bar. At bottom of the photograph was a long piece of white masking tape. A small caption had been written on it in captial letters.

ONE MEMBER OF YOUR TEAM WILL BE KILLED!

"Buck go and get enough gloves for everyone and evidence bags, as many as you can get." Chris ordered him.

"What's up Chris?" Vin asked him.

"They're photos, the first one is of all of us and it says that one of us is going to be killed. Doesn't say who." Chris looked at the faces in the photo then at the men around the table. His mind wished for Buck to hurry so he could look at the rest of the photos. It was at that moment that Buck came back, he handed out the gloves then left the evidence bags next to Chris.

After putting on a pair of gloves, Chris handed the first photo to the man on his right, Vin. He looked at it then passed it on, the photo went around the table until it returned to Chris. He handed it back to Josiah, who was sitting on his left, with the evidence bags. Josiah nodded, it would be his job to place each photo into a bag because he was going to be the last to look at them.

He looked down at the second photo. It was a single shot of himself leaving his home. A caption was also taped to the bottom.

IT WON'T BE YOU!

The next one was another group photo but his own face was marked by a cross.

YOU CARE ABOUT THEM DON'T YOU!

Another group photo.

WHICH ONE DO YOU CARE ABOUT MOST!

The next photo was of Buck at the bar of Inez's saloon. Chris frowned, whoever took these photos had gotten close to himself and Buck, he knew the other photos would be the same. It was obvious that the person knew what they were doing.

THIS ONE!

A black and white photo of Vin in his jeep, he was stopped at the traffic lights just outside of the ATF building.

OR THIS ONE!

He handed the photo to Vin and looked at the expression on his face but he didn't see one, his eyes glanced around the group, he could tell that each man was now expecting a photo of themselves. He looked down at the next one. JD coming out of a takeaway restaurant.

MAYBE THE YOUNGEST OF YOUR GROUP!

The next photo was of two men, Nathan and Josiah.

YOU CARE ABOUT THESE TWO MEN BUT NOT AS MUCH AS THE ONES I HAVE ALREADY MENTIONED SO CAN YOU ASSUME THEY WILL BE SAFE. MAYBE, MAYBE NOT!

Chris expected the next photo to be of Ezra but it was another group photo, he frowned and looked up at Ezra, the southerner was looking at the photo Vin had just handed him.

"Chris?" Vin's quiet voice prodded him.

He looked at the photo then the caption.

HAVE YOU NOTICED HOW THE SIX OF YOU ARE GROUPED TOGETHER WHILE ONE STANDS TO THE SIDE!

Chris took a closer look at the group shot, the team was outside in front of the ATF building. He couldn't remember what they were doing on that day. Six members of the group were standing close together but Ezra stood a short distance from them.

He passed the photo on and waited to see if there was going to be a reaction from Ezra, there wasn't. Or did he hide it behind his poker face. Chris thought the latter. The next one was of Ezra. He was sitting on the bonnet of his jag, his features were hidden but he knew it was Ezra. He was looking over his shoulder towards the entrance of the bar they all frequented regulary. All of them except Ezra.

THIS ONE'S THE LONER, YOU DON'T CARE FOR HIM LIKE YOU DO THE OTHERS!

His eyes lifted to look at Ezra's face, he passed the photo on and waited. There was no reaction to that photo either, he didn't hesitate, he spent the same amount of time looking at it as he did the others then passed it on to Buck. Chris saw Buck look sideways at Ezra but the southerner was ignoring him, he was now watching Chris and waiting for the next photo. Chris caught Buck's eye and the same thought passed between them. Was Ezra going to believe what these photo's were saying?

Another photo of Ezra, this one must have been taken a few seconds after the first. His face was clearly in view, so were his emotions. His expression was one of fear and loneliness, Chris had seen it many times on his own face after his familie's death. He looked at the photo carefully, he took in every part of Ezra's face, the green eyes that were now a dark grey but the emotions were still clear to him. There was one thing about Ezra's features, they were very expressionable, if he wanted to he could speak volumes with his expressions but for most of the time he chose not to. Chris knew that everyone was looking at him now but they kept silent, they would ask their questions later. He looked at the brow that was furrowed in thought and it hit him. Ezra was trying to decide if he should go in or not, the loneliness on his face told him that he wanted to but the fear held him back. Chris knew it was a fear of allowing people to get close to him, he kept everyone at arms length. The southerner thought that he couldn't get hurt that way but by looking at the expression on his face Chris knew Ezra was wrong, he just wouldn't admit it to himself.

DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HIM?!

He was sure Ezra was going to react to this one but the calm facade stayed in place.

Ezra was struggling to keep control, his headache was worse, his side was still protesting against the weight that had been placed on it earlier and now this. The photos were telling him what he already knew. Chris didn't think of him in the same way as the others, the person who had sent the photos wasn't a threat to him but he was to the rest of the team. He took the next photo that Vin handed him, he could feel Chris's eyes on him. He looked down at his own face, he remembered that night clearly, it had been a week before the car accident in which he and Vin had been injured. He drove to the bar with the intention of going in but something stopped him. The other members of the team spent a lot of time there, he had refused their invitations at first but then began to accept them but sometimes it became to much for him, he always felt like the outsider, he was never invited in but he had also never asked to be let in. That night he had been afraid to go in, it had been a bad day and he felt more vulnerable than usual, he wanted to open up and talk to someone about what had happened but instead he sat outside for half an hour before getting back into his car and driving home. He handed the photo to Buck

Chris looked through the next eight photos, they were of five members of the group, either on their own or with others. He himself wasn't in them but that was because he was told that he wasn't going to die. Ezra also wasn't in them but for a different reason, the person who took them thought that he didn't care about Ezra so he wasn't threatening Ezra's life. He passed each photo on.

He looked down at the next photo and his mouth dropped open, how could this person have gotten so close. The image was of Vin lying in his hospital bed, he was by his side, Buck on the other. JD and Nathan were at the foot of the bed.

WHY ARE YOU WITH TANNER?!

The next photo showed Ezra in his hospital bed. Josiah was sitting in a chair next to him reading a book.

AND NOT STANDISH? WEREN'T YOU WORRIED ABOUT HIM?!

Chris didn't want to pass this photo on but he had no choice. He watched Ezra once again and this time there was a reaction, it was slight but Chris saw it.

The next group of photos were various images of Vin recovering in hospital and at home, he was surrounded by friends in some photos, while the others showed his friends coming and going from Chris's home. He knew what the photos after these ones were going to be and he wasn't proven wrong.

"Shit!" He thought he spoke to himself.

"What is it Chris?" Buck asked him.

"Ezra, you can't believe what these photos are saying. Whoever is doing this is only showing us what he wants." He handed the photos to Vin who then carefully looked a them. He turned to Ezra and watched him carefully.

Ezra had just finished looking at the photos of Vin when he heard Chris's voice. He waited to see what the photos were before answering him. He took the group of images from Vin. They were different from the ones he had just looked at. The first one showed him on his own, the chair beside the bed was empty. The next photo showed a man in a white overcoat giving him an examination, there was a nurse with him but no one else. Another photo showed JD and Buck. The taller man was looking out the window, JD was asleep in the chair. Ezra got the impression that they didn't want to be there. In the fourth image Ezra was awake but alone.

He remembered that moment clearly, he had woken up to find no one in the room with him. It was the only time it had happened, after that there was someone there but not everyone. But he understood, they needed to be with Vin, they made sure that he was okay but always returned to Vin. The next five photos were in succession with the fourth, each one showing him on his own.

"It's perfectly understandable Mr Larabee." Ezra told him but felt otherwise. He remembered who sat with him when he was awake and Chris wasn't one of them, if he had stayed with him it would have been when he was asleep, that way he didn't have to make conversation with him. "Your concern was in the right place." He passed the photos on. His fingers once again found the wound on his head and he began to rub it without realising what he was doing.

Chris was watching him and knew that he was thinking differently to what he was saying. His mind drifted off to the day of the accident.

Ezra's Jaguar had broken down, and he required a lift home. He had listened as the others argued about who was going to do it, neither of them wanted to. Ezra told them to forget about it, he would get a cab but Vin gave in and volunteered. It was a punctured tire that caused Vin to loose control of the car. The passenger side, where Ezra was sitting, bounced off the side of a pole back onto the road. Ezra's head had hit the dashboard with enough force to put him in a coma for two days. The car following them had braked but not quick enough, it hit the driver's side and was the cause of the bruising on Vin's hip. Chris had been concerned about both of them but he did spend most of his time with Vin, he had looked in on Ezra but didn't stay with him for very long, he left that to the others. His guilt grew as he watched the southerner hide what he was feeling.

"Do you remember that? If you do, do you recall the person who was taking the photo?"

"Yes and no" Was the answer given.

"You okay Ezra?" Chris asked him.

Ezra could feel everyone's eyes on him, they had now seen the photos as well. "I'm fine."

"Leave your head alone Ezra." Nathan ordered him. He grimaced when Ezra defied him and continued to rub against the wound.

"Do as your told Ezra." Chris told him.

Ezra pulled his hand down and placed it on the table. There was a nasty retort in his mind that wanted to be voiced but he wouldn't allow it, if he did they would know what he was thinking. These photos gave him the impression that Chris didn't care about him like he did the others but it told him something else; that none of them did. They trusted him and considered him a friend but that was all. They didn't care for him as strongly as they did each other. But he'd begun to get the same impression from the moment he woke up in the hospital to find himself alone, these photos were confirmation, an outsider had gotten the same impression. Ezra sighed inwardly, even as part of a group of seven men he was still alone.

Chris looked down at the next photo, it was another group one and this time it did include Ezra.

SO WHO IS IT GOING TO BE? I'LL LET YOU DECIDE!

The next one was an image of two men. Himself and Ezra. He recalled the day with perfect clarity. Ezra had done something risky in an undercover operation and he didn't like what he did, he'd confronted the southerner but lost his temper. He had slammed him up against a wall, his right forearm pressed against Ezra's neck. He told him that if he done it again he would loose his job. Chris was fuming that day but he hadn't told Ezra the real reason behind his anger. Ezra had risked his own life to take down the mark. Chris had been angry that the southerner was willing to do such a thing, sometimes he got the impression that getting the mark was more important to him than his life was.

But Chris also knew that Ezra wouldn't do it unless the odds were stacked in his favour but the dark clad leader had been to angry over almost loosing one of his men to deal with the situation with any rational thought, he had lost control and accused Ezra of being a loose cannon instead of telling him that he scared him by doing what he did. It was easier for Chris that way but now he was going to have to show Ezra his true emotions and tell what he had been to angry to tell him.

BUT DO YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THIS ONE DYING? WOULD HIS DEATH UPSET YOU LIKE ONE OF THE OTHERS WOULD!

He passed the photo on, he kept his eyes on Ezra's face. Chris thought he saw Ezra's hand shaking but the movement was quickly gone, he frowned as the undercover agent passed the photo on. His silence was worrying him, he wished the man wouldn't keep such a tight control over his emotions.

Ezra took the next photo. His hand shook, more in pain than rememberance of that day, it was taken on the same day as the two photos of him sitting on his jaguar outside of the bar, this was why it had been a bad day. Larabee had threatened him, not with his life but with his job and as far as Ezra was concerned his job was his life. Ezra passed the photo on, he didn't know if the others were aware of the confrontation that had taken place between the two, if they didn't they were about to find out.

The last photo was of Larabee himself.

BUT I WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE I DID LARABEE. ONE WILL DIE AND YOU WILL SUFFER AS I DID!

Once the last photo had been passed around then placed into an evidence bag Chris looked at each of his men, only one didn't return his concerned stare. Ezra was looking at his hands, his face was an empty void, no emotions were showing on his handsome countenance.

"Ezra."

"Yes Mr Larabee." Ezra lifted his head and his green eyes turned to look at his boss.

"I want to talk to you about this later." He nodded towards the stack of photos that had been made thicker by the bags they had been placed in.

"There is no need to explain." Ezra informed him but his attempt at distracting an explanation failed.

"Yes there is." Chris held his stare until Ezra looked away from him.

"So what do we do?" Asked Josiah.

He was also looking at Ezra, he thought back to the days that he had spent in the hospital, Chris had asked for them both to be in the same room but the doctor had refused. Ezra had to be closely monitored for the first five days and he claimed the constant activity would disturb the other patient. Chris then had to make a decision, he chose to stay with Vin, he was closer to him and he knew that the others would keep him informed of Ezra's condition. But Josiah had been surprised by the lack of concern that he did seem to show the southerner. He rarely visited him and when he did he didn't stay with him for very long.

When Ezra was released from hospital three days after Vin, Chris kept in contact with Nathan to monitor Ezra's recovery. Josiah knew that those last three days in hospital had been rough for Ezra, he saw the hurt that flickered through his eyes each time he entered his room only to find that no one accompanied Josiah. The others stopped in on their way to Chris's after work but never stayed long. Ezra seemed to be an afterthought. The quiet man knew that they didn't do it on purpose, they didn't realise what their activities were doing to the southerner and Ezra didn't tell them. It had been even worse for him at home, because he lived further away from Chris the visits had become less frequent until they finally settled for phone conversations to find out how he was doing. Two weeks passed before Vin returned to work, Ezra came back a week later. Josiah listened as Chris constantly asked the ex-bounty hunter if he was okay, so did Ezra but Chris didn't continually ask his undercover agent the same question. He had asked him once then accepted his answer but he wouldn't accept Vin's.

Ezra hadn't told Josiah what he was feeling or thinking, he had only known because he secretly kept an eye on him, at first it was because no one else did but then he started to see the emotions on his face when he thought no one was watching him and Josiah had become concerned. He watched for his reactions when the others did visit or didn't and he soon put it all together. Ezra was feeling lonely and the lack of attention was making him feel as though he was alone, that they didn't care for him like they did Vin and now everyone would be realising what they had done because the person who took these photos was mirroring Ezra's own thoughts and emotions.

"Firstly, Ezra is going to take these down to the lab, I know there won't be any fingerprints but maybe they could get something. I'm going to go down to security to find out who delivered it." He stood up and pushed the photos towards Ezra. "The rest of you are going to decide who's place your staying at. I want the five of you together, no one is to be left alone. You can protect each other while Ezra and I find out who's doing this." Chris couldn't help but see Ezra flinching at the thought of being left out of the threatened group of men.

"What about Ezra? Where's he going to stay?" JD asked.

"I won't be staying with you Mr Dunne. Did you not look at the photos. I am not in any physical danger. The person doing this wants to kill someone Mr Larabee cares about. I am not a candidate." Ezra picked up the photos and walked out of the room.

"Aw Hell!" Chris took his gloves off and threw them down onto the table, the quiet slap that was made when they hit the wood did nothing to show the amount of guilt he was feeling.

"These photos are telling the truth Chris." Josiah informed him, he refused to flinch under the glares that were thrown at him. "Since the day Ezra woke up alone in the hospital . . . he's been feeling what those photos are telling you." He looked around at them. "He feels alone. None of you spent time with him, an hour here, an hour there but that's all. He feels like you don't care."

"That's not true Josiah, we do care but it was what Ezra wanted." Buck protested. "He wanted to be alone."

"That's the first time I heard about it." Josiah growled at him. "How do you know that's what he wanted?"

"Because he hates being looked after, he doesn't like people fussing over him and we thought that if we did that he would end up saying something that he'd regret." Buck retorted.

"If you knew why didn't you say something to us sooner?" Nathan asked the man next to him. He knew exactly what Buck was talking about. During the third day that he had spent with Ezra the inevitable had happened. Ezra had done what they had tried so hard to prevent from happening, he had lost his temper at being smothered with concern by the ex-medic and Nathan had payed the price.

"Because it took me a while to work it out, by then it was too late, the thought was already there. I tried talking to him about it once but he refused to listen. Told me that he was fine and not to worry about him." Josiah shrugged. "I didn't believe him but what could I do if he won't talk to me."

"You could have told me." Chris's tone was cold. He himself hadn't spent much time with Ezra for the same reason Buck had mentioned but he didn't realise it had a negative effect on Ezra.

"I shouldn't have to tell you Chris." Josiah returned his stare and his own voice held an underlying anger. "You should have seen the way he was feeling yourself."

Chris nodded in agreement, he was right, he should have seen it himself. He rubbed his face with his hands. "I'll bring it up when I talk to him later." Chris told him. He got up from his chair and left the men to argue over where they were going to stay.

Ezra returned to the seventh floor. As he walked along the hallway he could hear the raised voices, he couldn't help but smile to himself. Buck and JD were insisting on everyone staying at the cess pit and the others refused. He grimaced as a shot of pain tore through his skull, he stopped where he was and leaned against the wall. He carefully leaned his head against it and closed his eyes. He pressed his hand against his stomach, he was also beginning to feel ill, that was all he needed. While he could hear their voices he didn't think he would be disturbed. He needed some more tylenol, the decision brought back the memory that he didn't get the coffee that JD was going to bring him earlier. He first went to his office to retrieve some more pain killers then headed to the small kitchen. There was coffee already brewing and it smelt fresh, he poured himself a cup but it was to hot to help him swallow the pills so he used water to do that. He took the large mug of coffee and headed back to the conference room.

The loud volume of noise assualted his ears as soon as he entered the room.

"Can't you gentlemen argue in a quieter tone!" Ezra growled at them as he made his way to his chair, what he wanted to do was go back to the solitary confinement of his own office but under the circumstances it would be best to stay with the others.

"Sorry Ezra." Nathan turned his back on the argument and sat down opposite him and looked him in the eye, he frowned then stood back up and made his way around the table. The ex-medic sat down in a chair next to him. "Ezra look at me."

"I already told Mr Larabee that there is no need to . . . " He was unable to say anymore due to the large hand that now gripped his jaw, his face was turned towards the man that sat next to him.

"Your in pain. What's wrong?" Nathan let go of him.

'Don't forget that I am now feeling nauseas.' Ezra thought before speaking out loud. "I assure you Mr Jackson that I am not . ."

"Your pupils are larger than they should be, that indicates pain and your looking a bit pale." Nathan stopped him before he could finish his denial. "I'm not going to ask you again Ezra."

"Then don't." Ezra turned back to his coffee.

"Was it that fall you took this morning?"

"I thought you weren't going to ask a second time."

Nathan stood up and walked away, he wasn't going to go through the same thing that he did during the three days he stayed at Ezra's apartment after he had been released from hospital. He joined the others and ignored the concerned and confused expressions.

"Nathan?" Josiah raised his eyebrows at him.

"You heard. He's in pain but as usual he's denying it and won't let me help him so he can help himself."

Josiah was about to begin another argument to replace the one that was yet to be finalised when Chris walked into the room.

"Where are you guys staying?" Chris asked before he reached the seat at the end of the table.

"Our place!" Buck and JD spoke together.

"Not the cess pit!" Nathan, Josiah and Vin growled at the same time.

"If you guys can't make a decision then I will." He smiled across at Ezra but the southerner wasn't looking at him, he was watching Nathan. "Ezra, what do you think?"

"At the moment Mr Larabee? I don't think anything." Ezra wasn't going to help him make the decision, either way it would leave some of the men angry with him, and at the moment one was one to many. He was watching Nathan and the larger man looked back at him. Ezra could feel those eyes examining him so he quickly diverted his gaze. "And what did you find out downstairs?"

"Federal Express dropped it off believe it or not." Chris answered him. "We're going to go there to see if we can get some information on who arranged for it to be delivered." He was watching Ezra carefully. "After we make sure these guys get to the cess pit safely."

Ezra stepped into what he called the cess pool of life and stayed just inside the doorway. He wasn't going to go in any further. His eyes quickly glanced around the apartment, he could see the mess that covered the floors, the furniture and the kitchen, it included clothing, magazines and a couple of pizza boxes. No, he was staying right where he was. He waited patiently for Chris to finish talking to Nathan and Josiah, he knew he was part of the discussion as soon as Nathan turned around and looked at him.

"There's something else wrong Chris." Nathan glanced over his shoulder to look at Ezra, the southerner was watching them.

"What do you mean something else? We've got enough as it is." Chris growled.

"Ezra took a fall this morning, JD knocked him over and now he's in pain but won't admit it." Nathan explained to him. "It might be his ribs. Can you see if you can manage to talk him into letting me have a look when you come back."

"I'll hold him down for you Nathan." Chris smiled at him. He slapped him on the arm and headed back to the front door. "Come on Ezra, we're going to have that little chat in the car on our way to the Fedral Express office."

"Just great." Ezra muttered under his breath.

Nathan couldn't help but smile, finally some retribution was coming his way.

Ezra sat in the front passenger side of the dodge, his mind was going over the mornings events. His head was turned to the right and his green eyes watched from behind steel rimmed sunglasses as the scenery passed by. The bright setting evening sun was causing his headache to become even worse, he didn't think that was possible but his head was proving him wrong. It now felt as though his skull had actually spilt open and someone was now massaging the large vital organ within his skull with their sharp finger nails. He closed his eyes but the disorientation only made his stomach roll even more so he opened them again.

"Mr Larabee would you be so kind as to stop at the next chemist you see." Ezra needed more pain killers.

"Sure Ezra." Chris quickly glanced sideways at his passenger. "You okay?"

"I'm fine. It's nothing that a pain killer won't cure."

"Did you hurt yourself when JD knocked you over this morning?" He chanced another glimpse sideways but Ezra was still looking out the window.

"No." Was the clipped relpy.

"Then why do you want pain killers?" Chris retorted.

"My side is sore that's all." Ezra only told half of the truth.

"Nathan is going to check you over when we get back and before you argue with me, it's an order." Chris informed him. He didn't recieve an argument, not even an answer, Ezra just continued to look out of the window.

Chris saw a chemist sitting on the corner of the busy street, he slowed down and doubled park, he ignored the angry protests that were voiced with blaring horns. He put the car in neutral and turned sideways. He saw the grimace of pain that flashed across Ezra's face, he thought it was because he was twisting sideways to get out of the car but it was in fact from the noise of the horns that were still protesting. Ezra managed to get out of the car, he slammed the door shut behind him and walked away from the dodge. Chris winced at the anger Ezra had shown him by using the door to communicate his mood for him.

Ezra returned five minutes later with a bottle of diet coke and a large paper bag. After getting in the car he quietly shut the door, when he had exited it the first time and slammed the door it had felt like some had actually struck him, their fist connecting with the side of his skull. He removed six pills from the package he brought back with him and swallowed them with the cold soft drink, four pills were no longer working. He knew Chris was watching him but at the moment he didn't care, he needed to get rid of the headache and so far he was failing miserably in his attempts.

"You sure your okay?" Chris was becoming concerned, the pain had to be worse than he was admitting to if he took six pills.

"I'm fine!" Ezra growled at him, his voice was louder than he intended it to be and the sound reverberated in his skull.

"You just took six tylenol Ezra, that does not indicate fine!" Chris growled at him, he took a deep breath and calmed his anger, he wasn't going to get anywhere with Ezra if he stayed angry with him. "You don't look okay Ezra. You've gone pale." He observed out loud.

"Why all this concern now Mr Larabee?" Ezra asked quietly.

"I was always concerned Ezra, I just show it in a different way when it comes to you." He pulled back out into the traffic. "You were in the hospital for nearly three weeks, those photos would've been taken over a couple of days."

"Why wasn't anyone there when I woke up?" Ezra couldn't believe he was actually asking this question, he blamed it on his headache but he knew it was a poor excuse, he wanted to know, he wanted an explanation, a reason for them making him feel alone.

"We didn't know you were waking up, the doctor told us you'd be in that coma for another day and Vin had just woken up. It wasn't intentional Ezra." Chris explained.

"You were never there." Ezra muttered. He placed his hand against his stomach, he felt like he was going to be sick and the movement of the car wasn't helping.

"I was there Ezra." Chris assured him.

"Not when I was awake." Ezra turned to him.

Chris looked at him, he could see Ezra's face now but not his eyes, they were still hidden by his sunglasses, he wasn't able to see any of the emotions his undercover agent was feeling.

"Your a friend Ezra and I do care about you. I wasn't there because I know you don't like being fussed over, in fact you hate it. I settled for Nathan and Josiah telling me how you were and I checked in on you while you were asleep. I didn't realise how that was making you feel. You should have said something to us Ezra. Unless you speak up we don't know what's going on with you and we can't change what we're doing to make you feel better."

Chris was right, he didn't speak up and tell them what he was feeling but he had also been afraid. What if he told them and they agreed with his diagnosis of what he thought they were doing.

"What about the others?"

"They're the same Ezra. You know how moody you get, they didn't stay around to long because you'd only end up telling them to go away. This way they could continue seeing you without a visit ending in an argument."

Ezra thought about what had happened with Nathan. That situation had ended in an argument, a very heated one. He agreed with Chris up to a point but they had also stopped visiting him at home. He leant his head back against the seat and closed his eyes.

"They stopped visiting me at home, phoned instead . . . " Ezra started. He felt himself being jerked against the seat belt when the car came to a sudden stop. His head banged against the seat and he bit his teeth against the moan that wanted to escape.

"Ezra?" Chris had pulled into a parking spot in front of the Federal Express building. "Can I be blunt?"

"You always are." Ezra left his head leaning on the seat but he turned it sideways.

"You can't blame them for doing what they thought you wanted." Chris twisted himself in his seat. "They gave you what they thought you wanted and that was to be left alone. You gave them that impression. It had nothing to do with them preferring to stay with Vin, they wanted to be with you. Those first three days that you spent at home, you had a hard time with Nathan being there didn't you. He told us but he still hasn't explained what the argument was about. We didn't want to make it any worse for you." He patted Ezra on the shoulder. "They thought you wanted to be left alone Ezra. Next time tell them if they're doing something that hurts you." Chris opened his car door. "You stay here, I'll go in and find out what I can."

Ezra flinched when the words hit home, Chris was right, they were only doing it because they thought they were helping him. He pushed them away and they stayed at a distance but kept sneaking back in. He smiled to himself, at least they didn't leave all together. Next time, but hopefully there won't be, they'll be with him because he'll let them stay. He won't push them away. They would want to be there so he'll let them be there. Now he only had to decide on what words to use when he apologised to Nathan. The normally patient man had put up with a lot of his childish behaviour but didn't leave him alone, he stayed for the three days and Ezra realised that only a true friend would do that.

Ezra jerked awake when another horn blared within his eardrums, he looked around in confusion and found himself still in the dodge that was now driving through traffic. He also saw that darkness had settled over the city of Denver. He looked sideways at Chris and squinted when a turning car's lights reached through his sunglasses to remind him that his headache was still there.

"What happened?" Ezra muttered as he pushed himself back up into a more comfortable position.

"You fell asleep while I was in the Federal Express office, I didn't want to wake you." Chris slowed down when the car in front of him stopped. "You don't look so good Ezra, tell me what's wrong."

Ezra thought about it for a moment. "I've got a headache."

"Since the fall?" Chris questioned him.

"No, I've had it for a few days, it won't go away." Ezra admitted, he waited for Chris to loose his temper.

"We'll let Nathan know as soon as we get back, we're nearly there." Chris nodded.

"What did you find out?"

"Later Ezra, that way I won't have to repeat myself." He excelerated around the car that had stopped. "Oh and by the way, you're staying at the cess pit tonight, I'm not letting you go home on your own when your not feeling well." Chris's tone told him he didn't want an argument.

"Only if Buck changes the sheets first." Ezra smiled.

"Maybe we should stop and buy some fresh ones." Chris suggested.

A pair of brown eyes that were shaded by thick grey eyebrows watched from the second floor of the apartment building as the dodge pulled up to the curb that ran along side the building that housed Wilmington's flat. He followed the stiff movements of Standish and what seemed to be concerned movements from Larabee. He brushed the doubt away from his mind. His target had been chosen and he wasn't going to let the concern that Larabee was showing towards his undercover agent change his mind. The binoculars lifted so he could continue to watch the men in the flat. There wasn't a curtain on the window that overlooked the fire escape. He couldn't see everything through the small opening but he did see the men that walked passed it. Now all he had to do was wait until Larabee and Standish entered so he could make an attempt on his target's life. He wanted Larabee to be there when the one he had chosen died.

Chris knocked loudly on the door and waited for the voice to ask who it was, he replied then stepped into the room when the door was opened. Ezra followed him trying hard to hide the smirk from his face, even his headache wasn't going to ruin this moment for him. He stole a glance towards Nathan who was watching him carefully, he allowed the smile to appear and noticed that Nathan seemed to relax, he turned away from him and continued to follow Chris. They walked further into the living room, Ezra stood near the window and waited. He noticed that the room had been cleaned and wondered if Buck and JD had done it under protest or if Josiah and Nathan did it.

"What have you got there Chris?" Buck asked him when he saw the package in his hand.

"Sheets." Chris threw them at him. "Your going to change your bed so Ezra can sleep in it."

"I ain't changing my sheets. They are clean, I only washed them yesterday." Buck growled at Ezra.

"Yes but I'm sure they are permanently stained with your animal magnatism." Ezra replied.

Buck was about to ask him what he was talking about then he realised. He blushed, his cheeks growing red. "I'll change them."

"I thought Ezra wasn't staying here?" JD asked as he stepped closer to Ezra.

"Ezra's not feeling well. Nathan is going to have a look at him while Buck changes his sheets then he's going to bed." Chris informed everyone.

Ezra stepped away as Nathan moved in on him.

The ugly porcalin horse that sat on the bookcase shattered as the bullet struck it. JD drew his arm up to protect himself from the pieces that flew into his face.

"JD! GET DOWN!" Someone yelled out to him.

Ezra ran for him and as his arms wrapped around the younger man he felt another force hit him. He was thrown sideways and landed heavily, his head hit the floor with enough momentum to make him see white lights behind his eyelids. Two men landed on top of him, the air was forced from his lungs and someone's elbow hit his already injured side.

Buck moved at the same time as Ezra, he grabbed both men and threw them sideways, his own weight landing on top of both of them. He stayed where he was making sure that they couldn't get back up.

"Where did it come from?" Chris yelled.

"Came through the window next to the fire escape." Vin informed him.

"EZRA! Your with me." Chris called to him.

"Can't." Ezra croaked as he weakly tried to push the heavy weights off his body, he couldn't breath in the position he was in.

Chris didn't hear him, he was already on his way down the stairs to the building's exit but Buck heard him, he ran after Chris.

Chris reached the bottom of the stairs and turned to see what was taking Ezra so long, he frowned when he saw Buck coming down the stairs two at a time.

"Where's Ezra?" Chris asked him, there was no anger in his voice.

"He's down." Buck answered him.

"Shit!"

"Are we going out there or not."

"No!" Chris pushed himself away from the door and back towards the stairs.

"Why not, that guy just tried to kill JD, we can't let him get away." Buck didn't like the idea of the assassin getting away from them.

"JD isn't the only one he's after Buck, I'm not going to give him the opportunity to shoot you instead. Besides he was probably out the back door of that building before we left your flat." He began to walk up the stairs. "Let's go and see how Ezra's doing."

Ezra wasn't doing so good. He felt some of the weight disappear but someone else was still lying on him, the lack of air made it almost impossible for him to tell the offending force to get off so he could breath. He risked opening his eyes and looked up into JD's face, he could see the concern in the large brown eyes but JD didn't realise that he was making him feel worse.

"Get off." Ezra whispered then tried to take in some air, his lungs refused to work and he began to panic.

"Ezra?" Nathan pulled JD off then knelt down beside him, his hands were already probing the southerner's body for any injuries.

"Can't breath."

"Relax Ezra, just try and breath normally, you just need a few seconds." Nathan loosened Ezra's tie and shirt, he then undid the belt and button of his trousers. "I'm going to pull you over on to your side Ezra, it'll help you breath." Nathan did this as he spoke to his distressed friend. He gently pulled him onto his left side and placed him in a recovery position. "Don't breath too deep Ezra, you could loose consciousness, just try and breath normally."

Ezra relaxed and did as he was told, and after what felt like minutes but in reality were only seconds he felt the oxygen returning to his lungs, the pain also returned to his head and side. He grimaced in pain.

"Let's sit you up Ezra." Nathan reached for his shoulders to help him.

"NO!" Ezra protested.

"Ezra don't start on me now, I'm not in the mood for this!" Nathan growled down at him.

"No, it hurts, don't move me, it hurts too much."

"What hurts Ezra?"

"My head." Ezra admitted. "Just give me a minute."

Nathan didn't give him a minute, his used his large hand to turn his head to the side, he felt underneath his skull but felt nothing, there was no blood or bumps to indicate an injury.

"Josiah, can you help me get him into Buck's room." Nathan moved behind his shoulders and waited for Josiah to lift his feet.

"Just give me a minute Nathan! I can get up on my own." Ezra growled at him. Why wouldn't he listen to him, he told him he was in pain.

"Josiah." Nathan nodded to him.

They picked Ezra up and heard the groan that the movement elicited from him. He was carried into Buck's room then placed gently on the bed. Nathan began to remove Ezra's upper clothing, he wanted to check his side as well. He easily pushed Ezra's protesting hands away and he also ignored his requests to leave him alone.

"Nathan wait, please." Ezra moaned, his head had never felt so bad and now the constant movements were making his stomach roll violently. "Nathan."

"Nathan." Chris's firm voice caused the ex-medic to turn around. "Do like he says, wait."

"Chris I need to check his side, he's in alot of pain." Nathan turned back to Ezra.

"It's not his side Nathan, it's his head." This time Nathan stopped his movements. "He's got a bad headache, and he's had it for a few days."

"I'm going to be sick." Ezra groaned.

"Not in my bed your not!" Buck was standing behind Chris but pushed him aside and began rushing around the room looking for something that Ezra could use. He saw the waste paper basket in the corner of the room, he emptied it then ran back to the bed, he handed the basket to Nathan just in time.

Nathan pulled Ezra up into a sitting position and supported his neck while his stomach emptied itself, it was mostly dry heaving and this made Nathan angry. When Ezra was finished he pushed the basket towards Buck then laid Ezra back down.

"Ezra. When was the last time you had something to eat?" He tried to keep the anger out of his voice but didn't succeed.

"Breakfast, yesterday." Ezra told him as he kept his eyes hidden behind closed eyelids.

"And how long have you had this headache for?"

"Three or four days." Ezra flinched back from Nathan's angry tone but he still kept his eyes closed.

"Jesus Ezra! What the hell were you thinking? Why didn't you tell me!" Nathan practically yelled at him.

"It's just a headache Nathan." Ezra winced at the loudness of Nathan's voice and tried to raise his hands to his head to protect it against the noisy intrusion but the ex-medics hands intercepted them easily and pulled them back down.

"Something that's just a headache doesn't last three or four days Ezra, especially after a head injury!"

"Nathan calm down." Chris stepped up to him.

"Calm down, he . . . " Nathan looked up at Chris then back down at Ezra. He gave up. He leaned forward and lifted Ezra's eyelids to look at his pupils. "Have you been taking anything for it?"

"Tylenol but there not working." Ezra left his eyes open after Nathan lifted his lids.

"How many have you taken today?" He watched as Ezra frowned in concentration. "Okay let me put it another way. How many do you take at a time?"

"Four."

"He took six earlier." Chris added as he stepped closer to the bed.

"And how many times have you taken some today?" Nathan was shocked by the answer.

"Four."

"Are you trying to kill yourself? Have you been taking that many since your headache started?" He saw the slight nod to indicate that he had. "Ezra you can overdose on those, they can make you ill and do permanent damage to your liver!" He leaned over him. "No more! You understand me Ezra. No more!"

"I'm sorry but I though they were supposed to help." Ezra muttered.

"They are Ezra but not when you take that many, sometimes the cure can be worse than the cause."

Ezra sighed. "I'm sorry, I should have told you."

Nathan calmed down. "What about your side?" He pulled open the unbuttoned shirt, it was the only piece of upper clothing left on his body, Nathan had been interrupted by Chris before he could remove it.

"It hurts." Ezra could feel Nathan's fingers pressing into his side.

"There's still a bit of bruising Ezra, just give it some more time and try not to fall down any more." Nathan smiled at him.

He turned around and pulled Ezra's boots off then pulled the blanket up over him.

"Nathan." Ezra was watching him and waited for him to look back at him. "I'm sorry about what happened at my place, I didn't mean what I said. You were being a friend and I didn't see that."

"That's alright Ezra, I was partly to blame, I should have given you some more space." He tucked the blanket around the smaller man. "Get some sleep Ezra, we'll talk about it tomorrow."

"In these sheets?" Ezra raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah, call it punishment." Nathan sat on the bed and waited, it only took Ezra a few minutes to fall asleep, it was obvious to Nathan that he hadn't slept much over the last few days either. He got up and followed the others out of the room.

Nathan spoke before they could answer their questions. "He'll be fine, he hasn't been looking after himself, a mixture of not eating, not sleeping and taking too many painkillers finally got to him. I'll make sure he gets a decent meal when he wakes up and let him know what he can use to help with his headaches. His head is still healing so there will be a few more to come." Nathan waved off any other questions by asking one of his own.

"What did you find out at Federal Express?" He turned to Chris.

"You sure he's okay?" Chris refused to be pointed in another direction.

"I'm sure Chris."

The darkly dressed leader sat down on one of the chairs and leaned over, he pulled out the magazine he sat down on and grimaced at Buck who came forward to take it from his hand. "I got a name and address but when I went to check it there was only a parking lot. This guy's good, he's using fake ID to cover his tracks. So we have nothing to go on unless the lab gives us something on the photos which I doubt."

"You think we should find somewhere else to stay now he knows where we are?" Vin asked.

"No, he found you here, he'll find us again." Chris was beginning to get annoyed with Josiah's pacing but tried to ignore him. "Besides if you all move again it will give him another chance."

"Did you get a look at him." JD wanted to know but saw the confused look on Chris's face. "When you went out after him, did you see him?"

"We didn't go after him." Buck informed him. "Chris didn't want to risk me getting shot so the guy got away."

"Josiah why don't you sit down." Chris turned to him.

"Somethings not right." Josiah spoke out loud. He was standing in the position that Ezra had been in and was looking at where JD was and the book case. "I've got a feeling, it's nagging the back of my mind but I can't figure out what it is."

"It'll come to you." Nathan told him.

"I want to look at the photos again Chris." Josiah looked over his shoulder at the window then back at the book case.

"I'm going to the office in the morning to speak to the Judge, I'll get them then and bring them back for you."

"They won't be finished with them by then Chris, they'll need at least a few days to check them." Vin told him.

"You're forgetting Ezra's southern charm, that's why I sent him down with them." Chris smiled, he knew Mary had a thing about Ezra and would rush any piece of evidence he gave her through the works.

Nathan looked up as a tired looking southerner shuffled out of Buck's bedroom and make his way into the kitchen, he got up and poured a cup of hot coffee and used a tea towl to remove the hot meal from the oven. He placed both of them in front of Ezra after he sat down. He waited to see what Ezra was going to do, he put his own hand out to stop him from pushing the plate away.

"Eat it Ezra." Nathan sat down next to him.

Ezra looked down at the steak and vegetables and realised that he did feel hungry. "A bit much for breakfast isn't it?"

"It's not breakfast." Nathan watched as he tested the food then begin to eat it. "How's your head?"

"It hurts."

"It would, you've been through a lot Ezra, it's going to take a bit longer before your back to your old self." Nathan got up and returned before Ezra knew he was even gone. "I got Chris to get these for you, they'll do a better job with your headache than the other ones." Nathan removed one of the pills from the packet and put it next to the cup of coffee. "Take it after you've finished eating."

"Thanks Nathan."

"Your welcome."

"Where is everyone?" He looked up when he heard Nathan's laughter.

"Behind you." Nathan nodded towards the area that wasn't within Ezra's sight.

Ezra turned and looked over his shoulder, he saw the others staring at a wall that housed the group of photos that Chris had recieved the day before. He hadn't even noticed them when he walked passed them.

"They didn't find anything on the photo's, no prints, nothing that would give us a lead on this guy." Nathan answered before Ezra asked the question. "Ezra?"

"What time is it?" Ezra looked back at Nathan with a confused expression on his face.

"Just after one." Nathan leaned back in his chair. "You have to look after yourself better than you have been Ezra."

"Yeah, if I did I wouldn't have spent all night and half the day in that bed. The things I've heard about happening in that room." Ezra shuddered at the thought.

"You can sleep in clean sheets tonight, Buck will change them later. I want you staying here where I can keep an eye on you, and to make sure you eat."

"Can I at least go home and get some fresh clothes?"

"If Chris says it's okay and if you give me your word that you'll come back." Nathan agreed.

Chris stepped up behind Ezra and looked over his shoulder at the photo that showed the confrontation that they'd had. He had been watching Ezra for the last ten minutes and noticed that the southerner's eyes hadn't moved from it.

"You scared the hell out of me that day Ezra, I was too angry to be honest about it, I should have been more honest and told you what I was really thinking." He felt Ezra's green eyes looking at him but he didn't return the stare. "We seem to have given this guy a lot of ammunition to try and prove that we . . . I don't care. Sometimes I think I care too much about all of you." He finally turned sideways. "I don't want to loose any members of my team Ezra and that day I thought I was going to loose you, it wasn't a pleasant feeling." He handed Ezra his car keys. "I want you back within two hours Ezra. And watch your back."

Ezra smiled and gave him his two finger salute and left the apartment. Chris watched as the door closed behind him. He looked back at the photos and tried to see what it was that was bothering Josiah, the larger man had been looking at them all morning but had been unable to bring to light what was firmly stuck in the dark recess of his mind. He turned when he heard someone behind him.

"Is Ezra okay with everything?" Josiah asked him.

"Yeah, he's fine." Chris assured him. "You still don't have any idea what it is?"

"No." Josiah looked at each photo in turn, he read each caption carefully then reached the last two. "He's going out of his way to show that he didn't think you cared about Ezra. Why would he do that if he wanted to kill someone you cared about."

"That's what I was thinking. Why did he bother mentioning Ezra at all." It was a statement not a question.

"Buck! Have you got a marker pen?" Josiah turned and yelled out.

"You think of something Josiah?" Buck asked as he appeared with a black pen in his hand.

"Almost."

Josiah looked again at the last caption.

BUT I WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE I DID LARABEE. ONE WILL DIE AND YOU WILL SUFFER AS I DID!

He stepped forward and changed it.

BUT , I WANT YOU TO SUFFER LIKE I DID LARABEE. ONE WILL DIE AND YOU WILL SUFFER AS I DID!

Josiah underlined BUT on the photo to emphasis the word. It now held a different meaning to him. "Oh God! He's not after one of us, he's after Ezra. Look." Josiah moved to the side. "He used BUT. He's saying through all of these," he waved his arm in front of the other photos, "that you care about all the other guys and in this last one he starts with but. He's saying 'You care about these men, there deaths would upset you, BUT, I want you to suffer like I did. That's why he's made a point of you not caring about Ezra."

He moved to the spot where Ezra was standing the day before and pointed towards the bullet hole. "He was aiming for Ezra, he stepped away remember when Nathan moved towards him, that's why the guy missed."

"He also said here," Chris pointed to another photo, "that he was going to let me decide."

"And you did, by not protecting Ezra like your protecting everyone else, you allowed him to be on his own and that's what he wanted." Josiah told him.

"Shit! JD, Nathan you stay here just in case." Chris ran out of the room with the others following him.

Ezra pulled to a stop at the red light, he began to tap his fingers on the steering wheel, his headache had finally eased because of the stronger painkiller Nathan had given him. He berated himself for not going to him sooner and telling him that something was wrong. He looked into the rearview mirror just in time to see the car coming up behind him, he couldn't react fast enough, the car rearended him.

"Perfect." Ezra spoke to the empty car. "At least it wasn't the jag."

Ezra opened the door to get out of the car but instead found himself looking into a barrel of a gun.

"Move over! Now!" A husky voice yelled at him. "Move!"

Ezra did as he was told, he turned sideways to shift into the other seat and then fell into a dark void when the gun slammed against the back of his head. He fell across the seat. The man used his muscled strength to push Ezra's unconscious form onto the passenger side. He got into the driver's seat then pulled a pair of handcuffs from his pocket. He handcuffed Ezra's wrists behind him then drove away in the dodge. He left the car he used to ram Larabee's car where it was, he didn't need it anymore. He looked sideways at the slumped form and smiled. He had missed the night before but now he had Standish where he wanted him and he decided he was going to have some fun with him and Larabee before he killed the young Federal Agent.

He was going to make Larabee suffer. A year ago Hank Loyd wasn't concerned about a young agent on his team either, just like Larabee wasn't concerned about Standish, he didn't worry about him, thought that he hadn't been in danger but the young man had lost his life and Loyd had suffered with the guilt of it ever since. Larabee had arranged the operation that had caused the man's death. Now Standish was going to loose his life and Larabee was going to feel the same type of guilt. The guilt of not taking care of one of his own, of allowing him to be on his own when his life might have been in danger, for not protecting him or saving him when he's life was threatened.

"He's not answering." Josiah dialed again.

"I do care Josiah!" Chris growled.

"I know Chris and so does Ezra." Josiah hung up again and dialed in Ezra's home number.

"But why Ezra. Why does he want to hurt someone that he thinks I don't care about!" Chris pressed his hand against the horn and pushed down on the excelerator when the car in front moved out of the way.

"We'll find out when we find Ezra." Josiah told him calmly.

Chris slammed on the brakes when he reached Ezra's townhouse, he left Buck's car running and ran up to the entrance. He banged against the door but there wasn't an answer so he used his foot to kick the door open and he ran into the two bedroom apartment with Josiah, Buck and Vin hot on his heels. They searched everywhere and found nothing.

"Phone JD, see if he's shown up!" Chris growled as he headed back to the car.

Buck used his phone to call JD. "JD is he there . . . . no he isn't here and we didn't see him on the way either . . . . yeah we're on our way back now." He hung up and dialed the local police to have them put out an APB on Chris's dodge.

"What are you feeling now Chris?" Josiah looked sideways at him, he didn't really like the idea of him driving but he wouldn't allow anyone else behind the wheel, even when it wasn't his own car.

"What the hell has that got to do with it!?" Chris snapped at him.

"It has everything to do with it." Josiah told him. "He said he wanted you to suffer the way he did. What are you feeling?"

"I feel guilty Josiah, is that what you want to hear. Ezra might die because I didn't think he was worth protecting, I didn't believe he was in danger!"

"Then that's the way the man who has Ezra felt. Your suffering like he is." Josiah explained. "Does that ring a bell with you, did anything happen in the past where someone you know felt guilty over someone's death?"

Chris knew that Josiah was making sense, he was feeling what the man wanted him to feel, he was now in the same situation that this person had once been. "Not off the top of my head Josiah, I'd have to think about it."

"Then think quickly Chris."

"Buck, can you think of someone." He looked into the rearview mirror and watched Buck frown in concentration.

"No." Buck slumped back into his seat. Chris wasn't the only one feeling guilty, it had been his idea to do what he thought Ezra would want and that was to be given some space while he was recuperating from his injuries and now someone had selected him to inflict revenge against Chris by killing him because of what they had done. Buck had made Ezra feel alone without realising it and Ezra had suffered emotionally because of it and now he was going to suffer physically. He didn't know what he was going to do if Ezra paid the ultimate price for something that the rest of the team was responsible for.

Ezra thought he was in hell, well at least it felt like his head was, he thought that the pain had been worse before but now . . . he stopped thinking, it hurt too much. A blinding light tore through his eyelids into his skull, he groaned at the pain. His own sound caused a another noise to register in his mind. Someone was with him, he tried to open his eyes but they didn't want to work.

"Nathan?" He used his voice and listened for one of his friend's comforting reply but what he heard wasn't what he wanted to hear. It caused him to remember what happened and reminded him of the situation he was now in and it wasn't going to be a pleasant one, not only for himself but for his friends. Chris had told him that he did care and he believed him, his friends would now be worrying about him.

"He can't help you, none of them can, not that they want to anyway. They don't care about you." A familiar husky voice spoke to him.

This time Ezra forced his eyes to open, he flinched back when he found himself staring into a pair of brown eyes that were only inches from his own. He blinked to bring the face into focus but he didn't have much success.

"Why me? I thought you were going to kill someone he cared about." Ezra saw what he thought was a camera being held by trembling hands.

"That's what I wanted Larabee to think, but I want him to feel the way I did. He was responsible for the death of someone I didn't care about or protect and now he's going to . . . is feeling the same way I did and still do. He's going to suffer a lot of guilt over your death." The man explained and stepped back.

Ezra grimaced and tried to turn his head away when the camera flashed again. "You made a mistake, he does care, it won't be guilt that he'll feel."

"And that's why he didn't protect you? Because he cares? He allowed you to be on your own, that's how I got you." Loyd laughed at him. "I'm not wrong, the man doesn't care about you." He took another photo, he just wished he could be there when Larabee go these photos.

"You're wrong." Ezra looked up at him and the light flashed again causing him to see white lights for a few seconds.

"I'm not wrong!" He stepped forward and kicked Ezra's injured side, then kicked him again. The camera clicked so he could capture the pain on Ezra's face.

Ezra curled up into a ball to protect himself but the damage had already been done, his side was on fire, he wasn't sure if his ribs had been rebroken. He tried to relax and take smaller breaths. He could hear the man pacing in front of him.

"He does care." He tensed but he didn't receive any more kicks to his side. "He won't feel what your feeling."

"Yes he will!" Loyd stepped out of the small room he had thrown Standish into when he first arrived back at the large empty warehouse, he needed to develop the photos he had just taken so he could send them to Larabee. "He's going to suffer but not before you do!" He slammed the door shut, the door vibrated with his anger, he would take that anger out on his prisoner later when he wanted to take more pictures so Larabee could feel even more guilt.

Chris sat in his office going over previous case files, he had been at it all night and after each failure to find the one that would indicate who had taken Ezra, he'd slam it onto the rising pile next to him, the one in front of him was getting lower. He looked up when Buck entered his office with two cups of steaming coffe.

"Any luck?" Buck asked but he knew that he hadn't found anything, if he had they would know immeadiately.

"How could I have let this happen Buck?" Chris rubbed his tired eyes. "Why didn't I protect him like the rest of you? What's he going to think of me now? He's going to believe what this guy tells him."

"Ezra agreed with you Chris." He tried to alleviate the guilt that Chris was feeling. "He didn't think that he was in any danger either."

"That's no excuse Buck and you know it. I treated him differently, I've never treated him the same way I'd treat you or Vin. And now Ezra's paying for it!" He opened another file.

"Chris!" JD stepped into the doorway. "Security have another package for you, I'm just going down to get it."

"Bring it into the operations room JD." Chris stood up and followed Buck out of his office, his stomach felt as though it was filled with lead, it continued to sink into the depths of despair. Ezra was suffering and it was his fault.

When he knew that he was on his own Ezra first tried to free his hands but the handcuffs were tight against his skin, they had also been adjusted so he couldn't separate his hands, which meant he couldn't reach the locks to pick them. He looked around at his prison cell. There was the usual four walls, one of them housed a door but there wasn't any windows. The room was small enough for him to think that it was a large closet, it was dark and suffocating. As if it wasn't hard enough for him to breath now.

He shifted himself closer to the door and laid on his back, he then raised his feet and brought his knees closer to his chest and with all the strength he could muster he kicked the door, it didn't budge. Ezra ignored the pain erupting in his side and tried again, it still didn't move. He forced himself up into a standing position and tried again, he then used his shoulder. He collapsed to the floor, his chest was heaving for breath and this caused his side to hurt even more. He allowed his head to lean against the wall. He knew there wasn't any use in trying to yell out, he wouldn't be within hearing distance of anyone who could help him. His only hope was that the others were looking for him and would find him before this man decided to end his fun and take his life.

Or he could do the same thing he had to do all his life and that was to get himself out of danger. So often he hadn't had anyone to back him up or protect him, even in the FBI it had been hard for him, after the rumors of him being on the take started no one trusted him, and if no one trusted him they weren't going to risk their lives to protect or help him.

He thought about the men he now worked with, they trusted him with their lives and wouldn't hestitate in risking their own to protect him. Ezra silently prayed that he would get out of this alive but the prayer wasn't for his own selfish reasons, it was for his friends. He knew Chris would now be feeling alot of guilt over this, and if he cared like he said he did, and he was to die, then Chris wouldn't not be able to cope his death. But it wasn't Chris's fault, it was his own, if he hadn't given them the impression that he wanted to be left alone this wouldn't be happening, they were going to feel guilty over something that he was responsible for. He had to be able to tell Chris that it wasn't his fault. Ezra couldn't help but smile, the others would probably be blaming themselves for the same reasons.

Chris took the A4 envelope from JD, his own hands were shaking, he took a deep breath then turned it over. His fingers slowly pulled the taped flap open and he prayed that the photos were not going to show him that Ezra was dead, he wouldn't be able to live with the guilt of what they had done. His long fingers pulled out the photos, they were similar to the others, black and white with a taped caption at the bottom but there wasn't as many. He refused to look at the photo until he pinned it to the board so everyone else could also look at.

"SHIT!" Buck exclaimed as he turned away and ran his hands through his hair. He forced himself around so his eyes could look at the photo, his mind was telling him that it was going to get a lot worse.

It was a full body shot of Ezra, he was lying on his left side, his hands were held behind his back with a pair of handcuffs. But what scared them the most was the slack face, his eyes were closed.

I HAVE YOUR MAN LARABEE. THE ONE YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT!

"No shit." Chris muttered in answer to the caption.

He pinned another photo to the wall. It was a closer shot of Ezra's head, the features were still slack and his mouth was partially open. The caption asked the same question they were all thinking.

IS HE DEAD?!

Chris put the last photo on the board, his heart sunk into the same despair that his stomach had earlier. It was another close up of Ezra's face and it was contorted in pain. Ezra was suffering and Chris's guilt was growing to match his friends suffering.

NOT YET! BUT HE WILL BE AFTER WE HAVE SOME FUN. DON'T WORRY YOU WON'T MISS OUT ON IT!

"He's taken another blow to the head." Nathan stepped closer and pointed at the second photo to an area on the back of Ezra's head. The hair was matted to his skull and was darker than the rest that covered his scalp.

"That's not good is it Nathan?" Josiah asked.

"Depends on how hard he hit him." Nathan couldn't tear his eyes from the injury on the back of Ezra's skull.

"Can you see anything else?" Josiah moved to his side.

"His hands." he pointed to the first photo. "The handcuffs are too tight, they're cutting into his flesh, the dark patches around his wrists is blood." Nathan folded his arms. "I can't see any other injuries."

"What about this one?" Chris nodded to the third photo. "He's in a lot of pain."

"I don't know, maybe he just did something to him, it could be anything Chris."

"JD, who delivered the envelope?" Chris turned to him, he hung his head when he saw the pale complexion on the young man's face. "JD?"

"UPS this time." JD was staring at the photos.

"We have to find him before this guy starts having his fun with Ezra." Chris spoke out loud.

"And where the hell are we supposed to start?" Vin questioned him. "We've got nothing to go on."

"I don't know!" Chris yelled at him. "I don't know how to help him!"

"Calm down Chris, we're all feeling just as bad about this as you are." Josiah told him.

"I doubt that very much Josiah, your not the one who didn't protect him, it wasn't you who let him go out on his own without anyone to protect him. If Ezra dies it'll be my fault, not yours!"

"Why don't you and Buck go back and continue checking through your files, maybe you'll find something." Josiah suggested.

"Guilty huh?" Chris looked at Josiah. "This guy wants me to feel guilty. And at the moment I am, it's tearing me apart. He felt like that. But who?"

"Hank Loyd." It suddenly hit Buck with such a force that he couldn't say anymore without encouragement.

"Hank Loyd?" Chris's face became white with shock. "Why didn't I think of him! Jesus Christ Buck! I should have known."

"Who's Hank Loyd." Asked Vin.

Chris didn't answer, he was walking around in a very small circle.

"He was an ATF agent and headed Team Four. His team joined Chris's on an operation to take down a gun smuggling ring, things went wrong and one of Loyd's team was killed. He blamed Chris at first but then himself. He suffered so much guilt over the guys death that he had a breakdown, retired from the agency.

"Do you think that he'll actually harm Ezra?" JD asked. "I mean if he was ATF once, he might not carry out his threat."

"No JD, Ezra's a dead man and it's my fault." Chris stood still and looked up at Buck. "He never stopped blaming me, I went to see him in the hospital once and he told me that one day he'd make me feel the same thing that he felt."

Buck nodded. "Loyd never really liked the guy that died, so he allowed him to go into a situation that was risky, thinks that if he had taken better care of him that he wouldn't have died."

"Is that true?" Nathan asked.

"No. It was one of those things that no one could prevent but he still blamed himself, thought he should have protected him more." Chris muttered. "How the hell are we going to find Ezra when we've got nothing."

"We'll find him Chris, we have a name now." Josiah grabbed his arm. "Come on, let's start with the hospital he was in, maybe they have a real address for where he lives, we can go from there."

Ezra's head lifted when he heard the noise on the other side of the door, he stood up and leant against the wall beside the door. He waited patiently, the door was pushed open but no one entered.

"Step out where I can see you or I'll start shooting through the wall." Loyd fired his gun high in the wall to emphasis his intentions.

Ezra stepped into view, he wasn't going to get out of here if he was shot before he even made an attempt to escape.

"Come out. Now!"

Ezra walked out into the open and got his first look at the man who wanted to inflict so much emotional pain on Chris. The man was slightly taller than himself and well muscled. His eyes were brown but his hair and eyebrows were a dark grey. The nose was pinched and the mouth too small.

"See that wall over there and the hook. I want you to walk towards it then face it." He motioned with his gun then followed Ezra to the Eastern wall.

Ezra used his eyes to look around at his enviroment. The warehouse was large, the windows that lined the upper half of the walls were mostly broken, the floor was a large empty space, the only furniture was the table that stood near the hook on the wall. Ezra inwardly moaned when he saw the baseball bat, the large hunter's knife and the small black club. This man was going to try and inflict alot of pain so he could make Chris suffer.

"Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way." Loyd told Ezra. He kept his gun in his right hand and with his left he clipped another pair of handcuffs on the pair that already bounded Ezra's hands.

Ezra kicked out behind him and smiled when his boot connected with the man's knee, he spund around and kicked him in the jaw. Loyd fell backwards and the gun fell from his hand. Ezra kicked out again, this time his boot hit the side of his head, the man rolled onto his stomach. Loyd kicked out with his own boot and the heel hit Ezra's unprotected injured ribs.

Ezra couldn't stop the cry of pain eminating from his lips, he doubled over and before he knew it the man was on his feet and strong arms gripped his own, he was slammed against the wall and more pain tore through him. His hands were quickly uncuffed then a fist hit his side once more causing his knees to buckle, he was spun around and his hands were bound in front of him. The second cuff on the extra pair of handcuffs was pulled up above Ezra's head, the pain erupted in his side as his arms were pulled towards the ceiling, he almost blacked out from the pain, the cuff was placed over the hook. The hook was positioned in such a way that Ezra wouldn't be able to get the cuff over it. It was high enough to pull his arms until they were practically straight but the length of the link on the handcuffs was to long for him to be able to lift if off even if he stood on his toes.

Loyd stepped back and looked at his prisoner. He wiped his own mouth and saw the blood that covered the back of his hand. He quickly moved forward and backhanded Ezra across the face with his clean hand. He didn't want any marks on him yet.

"BASTARD!" He yelled into his face. "Now I'm really going to enjoy this!" He moved to the table and picked up the camera.

Ezra blinked as the light flashed in his eyes.

"He won't feel guilty." Ezra warned him.

"He will after I'm finished." Loyed smiled and took another photo.

He stepped closer then stopped. "If you kick out at me, I'll cause you more pain."

He grabbed Ezra's jaw and forced his head towards the left. He took another photo. He moved away and picked up the large knife that was on the table. He smiled when he saw the fear flicker through his victim's eyes.

"Don't worry, I'm not going to use this yet. It's to remove your jacket and shirt."

Once Loyd removed the upper clothing from Ezra's body he stepped back and took a full body shot, then a closer one of his injured side. He took a few more photos then moved back to the table, he placed the camera on the table then picked up the small club.

Ezra tensed up when the man turned around. He watched with wide eyes as he came closer to him. Ezra lifted his foot slightly but the man saw it.

"I could break that leg if you want me too. It's up to you." He smiled when Ezra lowered it back to the floor.

His movement was so quick that Ezra didn't even have time to react. The club slammed against the left side of his forehead. Loyd grimaced when the skin didn't break so he hit him again, this time he succeeded. He stepped back to admire his work. Ezra's chin now hung against his chest, the first blow had sent him into oblivion. The handcuffs tore into his skin as his unconscious form tried to pull his hands through the small openings.

Loyd grabbed the camera, he pushed Ezra's head to the side to reveal the new wound, he took a photo. He wanted Standish awake when he inflicted the next injury so he sat back to wait. The shutter on the camera continued to work as he took more pictures of the slumped form.

Chris drove away from Hank Loyd's apartment, Josiah sat in the passenger seat, the same dejected expression was on his face. They had search the small one bedroom flat and found nothing. The man was good. He left no traces that could lead him to where he was keeping Ezra. He jumped when his cell phone rang, he hesitated before removing it from the inside of his jacket.

"Larabee . . . . no don't open it until we get there, we'll be ten minutes . . . . no nothing! The man was always good, he knows what he's doing . . . . yeah but I'm beginning to doubt we'll find him alive Buck . . . . yeah." Chris hung up. "There's another package. This time it was handed into a police station by a civilian. Idiots took it without asking any questions."

"Shit." Josiah muttered. The man had said he was going to have fun with Ezra, and he was afraid that this next lot of photos were going to show what that fun was.

"We have to find him alive Josiah." Chris turned to him. "I don't think I could handle the guilt, I only just managed after Sarah and Adam, I don't think I could go through that sort of guilt again." his hands began to shake.

"Pull over Chris and let me drive." Josiah told him. He knew Chris was in a bad way when he did as he was told, the man was also afraid of what the new photos were going to tell them.

They quickly changed positions and now Josiah was driving through the streets of Denver back to the teams offices in the ATF building.

"You can't blame yourself for this Chris. The man got the wrong impression."

"It was an impression we gave him, I gave it to him."

"Ezra also gave it to him Chris. No one can take the blame for this."

"That was the wrong thing to say Josiah," Chris couldn't stop the smile that tugged at his lips. "Ezra wouldn't blame anything on anyone but himself, he takes responsibility for everything, he no doubt blames himself for this and for putting me through all of this guilt."

"You have a point there." Josiah felt the tension within the car ease a bit.

Chris stepped into the room and saw the package that was sitting on the table, it was a lot thicker than the last one they had recieved. He looked around at the pale faces that greeted him, everyone was thinking the same thing. Chris picked it up, his hands were still shaking, he felt a firm grip stop the shaking and looked up at Josiah.

"I'll do it Chris." He took the package away from him and tore it open, he pulled the photos out and moved closer to the large cork board that was used to place photo's of evidence on.

Josiah pinned the first photo to the wall. It was a close up of Ezra's face, his eyes were open and staring back at the camera.

HE LOOKS FINE AT THE MOMENT DOESN'T HE. THAT WILL CHANGE!

A second photo of Ezra's face, it was another close up but this time Ezra wasn't looking at them.

STANDISH IS A GOOD LOOKING GUY! THINK I SHOULD SCAR THIS PRETTY FACE?!

Josiah removed the third photo and pinned it next to the second one. It was a profile of Ezra's face, a hand gripped his jaw forcing his head to the side. The healing scar and fading bruise appeared darker in the black and white photo.

A NASTY INJURY! THINK I SHOULD GIVE HIM A MATCHING ONE ON THE OTHER SIDE?!

Josiah's own hands began to shake, he took a deep breath and stole a glance at the next photo.

"Son of a bitch!" He knew everyone's eyes were on him. He stuck the photo on the wall and stepped away. Other muttered curses reached his ears but he didn't take notice of them, he couldn't distract himself from the photo. Ezra's head had been forced to face the right to reveal the left side of his face. A new wound stared out at them, the laceration wasn't large but the bruising had already begun to form around it. A trail of blood ran from the wound down his cheek onto the hand that was holding his jaw.

FEELING GUILT YET LARABEE?! IF NOT THEN PLEASE CONTINUE!

Chris wanted to tell Josiah that he felt guilty enough, that he didn't need to see anymore but he could no longer speak. He watched as Josiah placed another photo on the board that was nailed to the wall behind it. This one was a full body shot. Ezra had been striped of his upper clothing, his head hung against his chest. There was no caption.

Another photo. This one was a close up of his wrists, the steel handcuffs were digging into his skin and it gave them the impression that they were scraping against the bones.

"He's unconscious." Nathan spoke up.

The next photo showed a very conscious Ezra Standish, the injury on his face was in full view and so was the pain that he was in.

The view shone in the next one made everyone moan, they knew from the previous photos what was going to happen. It showed the bruising on Ezra's side.

HIS RIBS AREN'T BROKEN SO I THOUGHT I WOULD DO THE HONOR!

Josiah's hands were shaking so badly that he pricked his finger while trying to pin the photo to the board. The photo showed the fresh injury to Ezra's side, the skin had even broken in places and the blood ran down his side and disappeared under the waistband of his trousers.

YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN WITH US LARABEE, YOU COULD HAVE HEARD HIM SCREAM!

It was a couple of minutes before Josiah had the courage to remove the next photo, it was a close up of Ezra's legs.

"Oh no." JD moaned before he even read the caption, he voiced all of their fears.

THE BASTARD MANAGED TO KICK ME THREE TIMES! SO I'M GOING TO BREAK HIS LEG!!

Josiah placed the next photo on the wall, Ezra's leg now hung at an awkward angle, but their eyes were looking at the baseball bat that was leaning against the wall next to it.

YOU SHOULD BE FEELING GUILTY BY NOW LARABEE!

The next photo was a mistake. It was taken from a low angle to show the way the handcuffs were now tearing through Ezra's wrists because he wasn't able support his weight. It also showed the broken window above him. There was no caption.

There was one photo left, Josiah didn't want to put it up but Chris nodded to him, they had to see it. The expression on Ezra's face was one of pure agony. There wasn't a caption, the photo and expression told them everything. Chris ran to the board and tore it off.

A shroud of silence hung in the room that lasted for ten minutes, each man looked from one photo to the next.

"At least we know he's alive." Vin muttered.

"He was alive then! It doesn't mean he's alive now!" Chris stood staring at the photo that showed the window and the warehouse beyond it. There was an old faded sign that brought a memory to the forefront of his mind. "I know where he is." Chris turned to them. "I know where he is!"

"Where?" Josiah asked him.

"The warehouse where it all originally happened. He's taken Ezra there." Chris ran out of the room with everyone following him, each of them saying their own silent prayer that they weren't going to be to late.

Chris slowly drove around the large wharehouse, he spotted the back end of a black dodge peaking out from the side of the building, he drove towards it then carefully applied the brakes until Buck's car rolled to a stop. Four men got out of the car, they left the doors open, they didn't want to make any sort of noise that would give them away. The last thing they wanted to hear was a single gunshot, unless it was fired by one of them. Chris looked over his shoulder to see Nathan and Josiah exit their own car in the same way. He motioned to Buck and Vin to follow him to the small the door that would allow them to enter the building.

"Vin. As soon as he goes for a weapon or if he has one in his hand take your shot. I don't want to give him a chance to hurt Ezra anymore." He looked into Vin's light blue eyes. "Do you understand what I'm telling you?"

Vin nodded, he would do it anyway, even without Chris's instructions. He moved into position between Chris and Buck.

"JD you stay out here and wait for the medics, they should be here any minute now." Chris ordered him. They had phoned for an ambulance on the way over and threatened them that if they used their sirens they would be riding in the back of the ambulance instead of the front on the way back to the hospital.

Chris tried the door handle, it was locked. He nodded to Vin and Buck to make sure they were ready. They both indicated that they were. Chris faced the door and kicked it in, all three men entered the large area at once. Chris and Buck immeadiately moved to the side.

"ATF! Put your hands in the air where we can see them!" Chris yelled at the top of his lungs, he needed to alleviate some of his anger at the sight before him, it was even worse than the photos. Ezra hung limply by the handcuffs on his wrists. His side was covered in blood and his leg was twisted into an awkward position.

Hank Loyd spun on his heels in shock, Larabee wasn't supposed to find them. He knew he would eventually figure out who was doing this to him but to find him and Standish before he killed him, that wasn't part of the plan. He pulled the gun from his waist band but before he could raise it high enough to use it a bullet entered his heart, stopping it from pumping blood to his revenge crazed mind.

Chris ran to Ezra, his eyes and gun were aimed at the man who was lying at his friends feet. He nudged the man with his foot, when there was no movement he put his gun back in it's holster and turned to Ezra.

"Don't touch him Chris!" Nathan yelled out to him as he ran towards them. "CHRIS! DON'T TOUCH HIM!"

Chris stepped away from Ezra's inert form. He heard Nathan's words, he wanted to get Ezra down but Nathan knew what he was talking about.

"Medics are here!" JD yelled into the warehouse as he entered it.

Nathan and the others caught up with Chris. The ex-medic stepped forward and lifted Ezra's face, the eyes were open and staring back at him. Nathan's heart skipped a beat.

"Nathan?" Ezra's voice was full of pain.

"We're here Ezra." Nathan confirmed for him. "Try not to move, we'll get you down in a sec."

Nathan turned to see the two medics running towards them with a stretcher and medical equipment.

"Give them some room guys." Nathan pushed the others out of the way.

The first medic quickly examined Ezra, he gently felt his side and everybody winced when they heard Ezra moan. He ran a hand expertly over the broken leg then checked the two head wounds.

"Joe I'll need an airtight dressing, he's got a sucking wound." He looked towards Nathan and Josiah. "Can you help me lift him down."

When Nathan and Josiah joined him at Ezra's side he indicated what part of the body to touch. "We have to be careful of his broken ribs, one has already punctured the skin's surface, we don't one doing the same to his lung." He positioned himself next to Ezra. "On three we lift and you," he looked at Nathan, "keep his arms above his head."

He counted to three and together he and Josiah lifted Ezra. Nathan made sure the cuffs easily came free of the hook on the wall and kept his arms in an upright position. Josiah lifted him into his arms, while the medic supported the broken leg, the movement caused Ezra to cry out in pain. He laid him down on the stretcher and stepped back. The first medic then carefully brought Ezra's arms down and placed an oxygen tank between his legs and a mask over his mouth and nose.

"Is there any chance you have keys so we can remove these." The medic pointed at the bloody handcuffs.

Vin moved to the corpse of Hank Loyd and checked his pockets, he returned to the stretcher and handed the man the key. He watched as the cuffs were removed, he looked at Ezra when he heard the small whimpers escape from his throat as the steel was pulled away from the torn and bloodied flesh. As soon as his hands were free Ezra lifted his left arm and removed the oxygen mask.

"Chris . . . ." Ezra moaned, his eyes moved from one person to the next looking for him. "Chris . . . . "

"I'm here Ezra . . . you just take it easy, we're all here." Chris came forward and leant over the stretcher. He looked into Ezra's painfilled eyes while he tried to put the mask back in place.

"Not your . . . fault!" Ezra growled up at him. "Not . . . your . . . fault!"

"We'll talk about this later Ezra. Don't talk now, let these guys take care of you first." Chris told him as he forced him to accept the oxygen mask. "Later Ezra." He wiped the damp hair from Ezra's forehead and felt him nod underneath his hand.

The two men finished applying an air tight dressing around the fractured ribs and puncture wound, they then placed Ezra's right arm across his stomach to help support his ribs. Once the broken leg was supported and a makeshift bandage placed around his two head wounds he was wheeled towards the door that gave him his freedom from his cell of torture.

"I need two people to stay here and clean this up." Chris looked at his men.

"I'll stay." Vin volunteered.

"Me too." JD agreed.

"Thanks." Chris ran out after the medics so he could catch them and ride to the hospital with Ezra.

Vin and JD stepped through the open sliding doors and headed straight for the waiting room, they knew the others would be there waiting for news on Ezra. Everyone was there except Chris. Vin could see three heads that hung low, their eyes watching something that was torturing their own minds. Vin knew what the images were, he couldn't get the photos of Ezra out of his own mind, they were going to be there for quite a while, they were going to play repeatedly through his mind along side of the real image of Ezra when they had found him. He didn't want to speak, he was afraid that when they heard his voice their mournful expressions would look up at him and tell him that Ezra didn't make it. He heard JD's voice breaking the silence.

"How's Ezra?" He moved forward and sat in the empty chair next to Buck.

"He's going to be okay with time, his injuries aren't serious but they are going to cause him a lot of pain for a while." Nathan informed him as he looked up at the sound of JD's concern, he looked across at Vin and saw the relief that lined his face. "The headwounds weren't serious, he has a concussion, the guy hit his forehead twice. The right leg has a nasty break but the Doctor said that he won't be left with a limp. One of his broken ribs punctured through his skin, but there weren't any complications. And they had to stitch the flesh around his wrists, some of the tears were deep, one cuff nearly tore open his main artery." He sighed and leaned back in his chair. "We're waiting for them to settle him into a room before we go in."

"Where's Chris?" Vin asked.

"He's with Ezra." Buck smiled but it was a smile that showed a lot of guilt and worry. "He wouldn't leave Ezra for a second, even pulled his gun on the Doctor, didn't want him to feel alone. We over did it last time, we should have been there more often for him."

"Gentlemen." They all turned towards the sound of the female voice that interrupted them. "You can go and see Mr Standish now, he's in room 202."

"Thanks." Josiah smiled at the young lady and walked quickly to Ezra's room.

Josiah walked into the room first, the sight was a lot more pleasant than the last one he had of Ezra, he was now lying on his back instead of hanging by a hook. The blanket only covered him to his waist, the thick bandage that was wrapped around his waist hid the wound that one of the ribs had caused. His eyes lifted to Ezra's face, it was even paler than the bandage that covered his forehead, it hid both the old and new wounds but not the bruising that had managed to find a way to sneak out from under the bandage to surround his eyes. But it was the peaceful expression on his slack face that brought comfort to Josiah's heart, it was a stark contrast to the photo that showed the agony that he had been feeling. He felt himself being pushed forward and he complied with the request and stepped further into the room.

Buck pushed Josiah out of the way and headed straight to the bed, he stood behind Chris and looked down into Ezra's face, his head was leaning towards his left shoulder so he was facing anyone who sat on his left side. He placed his hand Chris's shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze.

"Ezra was right Chris, it's not your fault." Buck told him.

Nathan stood at the foot of the bed and listened to what Buck had said, he could also see the guilt that he wore. There was to much guilt within the room and it hung like a shroud that wanted to engulf all of them.

"Not about this Buck." Chris looked at Ezra's injuries, the elevated leg, the broken ribs and his forehead. "If I protected him he wouldn't be in this condition, he wouldn't have gone through all that pain. Your saw the look on his face in that photo. I should have protected him from that."

"We can argue over who's to blame later Chris, just be glad that he's okay." Josiah told him after he sat down in the chair that was on the right side of the bed, he wanted to pick up Ezra's hand but couldn't, it had been placed into a sling to help support his ribs.

The rest of the team stayed quiet and found a position in the room to wait for Ezra to wake up, they wanted him to see all of them there so he would know that they did care about him, they weren't going to leave him alone this time.

Ezra woke to feel an extreme amount of pain eminating from his entire right side, it added to the headache that still hadn't gone away. He wasn't sure where he was and for a moment he panicked, his eyes sprung open as he tried to sit up, he let out a scream when the pain erupted to take control of his mind.

"Ezra! It's okay, your in the hospital, your okay now." Nathan leaned over him and pushed his shoulders back down. "Calm down Ezra, your okay."

Ezra could hear Nathan's comforting voice, his mind relaxed and his body followed it's instructions but the pain didn't ease, he felt a cloth wipe his face and he cautiously opened his eyes, he could see a face leaning over him but he had to blink a few times before it came into focus. He forced a smile onto his face at the sight of the pair of bright blue eyes that stared back at him.

"Ezra, it's good to have you back." Chris returned the smile even though he could see the pain in Ezra's eyes, he wanted to take that pain away, put himself in Ezra's place so he didn't have to suffer any more.

"Not your . . . fault." Ezra's expression became serious, but it fell away as another bolt of pain tore through him.

"I'll go and get a nurse." Buck told them.

He could see the pain that Ezra was in and like Chris he wanted to do anything he could to alleviate it.

"That's what we keep telling him Ezra, but will he listen, no. The man is as stubborn as you are." Vin spoke from the other side of the bed and Ezra had to turn his head to look at him.

As his head moved to the right Ezra saw his friends in the room with him, he wanted to greet them with a smile and not let them see the pain that he was in but his teeth were tightly clenched, he forced his face to relax when his eyes focused on Vin.

"You need to . . . be more . . . persuasive."

"And you need to stop talking and get some rest." Chris ordered him.

Ezra had turned back to Chris and looked into his eyes. He could see the guilt behind the relief.

"Not until you say it!" Ezra demanded, he didn't like seeing the guilt in his eyes. "It's not your . . . fault."

"It wasn't my fault." Chris lied.

"Don't lie to me Chris."

"Then I'm sorry Ezra but I can't say what I believe to be wrong." He hoped that the state Ezra was in would stop him from seeing the lie but the man was good.

"Argue about it later!" Nathan growled at both of them. "Ezra needs his rest and this won't help him."

"How did you find . . . me?" Ezra ignored Nathan and smiled when he heard him grunt in frustration.

"One of the pictures that Loyd sent showed your wrists, it was an upward angle so it also showed the window above you. I recognised a sign that was in the background of the picture." Chris explained.

"Who was he?" Ezra didn't want to move his head anymore so he continued to look at Chris. "And why . . . did he want to hurt . . . you?"

"Later Ezra! You need to rest and I won't take an argument from you." Nathan still stood next to Chris.

"Ah, the forever concerned friend." Ezra smiled up at him. "Will you be . . . staying with me Nathan . . . or has someone else drawn the . . . short straw?"

Nathan looked away from him to hide his smile.

"You didn't?" Ezra tried to raise his eyebrows but the bandage stopped them from moving.

"No, I did." Chris smiled at him.

"Good Lord." Ezra sighed.

"Got a problem with that Ezra?" Chris prodded his left arm.

"No, no problem at all." Ezra inwardly grimaced at the thought of Chris looking after him.

Ezra didn't turn towards the door when it opened but he heard Nathan's voice as he told the nurse how much pain he was in. He heard the door close again.

"She'll be back in a minute Ezra with something to ease the pain."

Ezra nodded, he was in too much pain to refuse it.

Chris sat in the fading darkness of Ezra's bedroom, his eyes took turns to glance out of the ground floor window at the colourful rays of the new days rising sun that began to reveal the sleeping form in the large double bed. It had only been two weeks since they had rescued him and the pain that Ezra was feeling was only beginning to subside. But Chris's guilt had continue to grow. Ezra had constantly told him that it wasn't his fault but who else's fault was it, he had given Loyd exactly what he wanted, someone that he didn't think he cared about. But he did care, he chastised himself for not showing Ezra that he cared.

He stood up and leaned over Ezra when he heard his breathing change rhythm, it had quickened. He turned on the small lamp on the bed side table so it could help reveal the sleeping features, he saw the paleness of Ezra's flesh, he could also see the small droplets of sweat that had begun to form on his forehead, he knew Ezra was in pain but the stubborn southerner wouldn't admit it. Chris grabbed a cloth and wiped Ezra's face. The touch caused him to jerk awake.

"It's okay Ezra, your okay."

"Chris?" Ezra's eyes fluttered opened and quickly closed again.

"Yeah it's me, go back to sleep Ezra." Chris continued to wipe his face while he drifted back to sleep.

He settled back down into his chair and his eyes moved back to the window, the sun was rising and he was going to try and take some enjoyment in it. He looked back at Ezra and smiled, the early sun would also rise him from his slumber and he wasn't going to like that. It had been his first night in his own bed, the Doctor had finally released him from the hospital. He didn't want to but they had to compromise with the stubborn southerner, he had agreed to stop threatening them with physical harm if they released him and allowed him to go home, they agreed, but only on the condition that someone stayed with him twenty four hours a day for another week. Ezra had relented but complained about that part of the bargin for the rest of the day.

Chris hadn't been looking forward to the first few days alone with Ezra, mainly because of the guilt he was feeling, he was afraid of an argument developing. Ezra was serious about it at first but as time went by and he still saw the guilt in his blue eyes everytime he looked at him that anger had grown just as much as Chris's guilt. Josiah had intervened and said that he would stay with them for the first night and the rest of the guys had volunteered to spend the weekend. Chris thought that it was only delaying the inevitable but he saw Ezra relax at the suggestion so he also agreed.

As the hour passed slowly the room began to become brighter, Chris leaned over and turned the lamp off, he saw Ezra stir out of the corner of his eye and quickly turned back to him. He waited but the smaller man had settled back down again. Chris could also hear Josiah moving around in the spacious kitchen but didn't go out to greet him, he wasn't going to leave Ezra to wake up alone. The only time he had left the southerner in the last two weeks was when he was awake, but he stayed by his side when he was asleep, he wanted to be there each time he woke up.

He saw the slight movement coming from the bed again and heard Ezra voice the pain that the movement caused. He shifted from his seat to the other side of the bed and sat on down next to Ezra's uninjured side. He waited patiently for him to fully wake. The guilt continued to tug at his heart each time a grimace crossed the handsome face in front of him. He watched as Ezra's eyes opened and the pain in them was clearly evident.

"What time is it?" Ezra whispered.

"Nearly six." He saw the slight nod as Ezra closed his eyes and allowed his head to roll to the side so his chin rested on his left shoulder. Chris knew he had every intention of going back to sleep but he also knew that the pain wouldn't let him.

"Josiah's making some coffee, you want some?"

"No."

"Breakfast?" Chris raised his eyebrows, it was an effort for any of them to get him to eat this early in the morning.

"Hell no." Ezra smiled but his eyes stayed hidden, he didn't want Chris to see his pain, it only made his guilt stronger. "Chris?"

"You need something Ezra?"

"Yes I do, I need you to stop feeling guilty." Ezra opened his eyes and looked straight into Chris's blue ones, he could see so much guilt in them.

Chris didn't answer him, he had to force himself to continue looking into Ezra's green eyes, they seemed to be darker they were normally were, he knew it was because of the pain that filled them.

Ezra became angry at the silence that Chris gave him, he wanted an answer.

"Get out!" Ezra turned away from him.

"I'm not going anywhere Ezra, I'm not leaving you alone." Chris told him.

"Get out! I can't handle seeing that guilt everytime I look at you!" Ezra growled at him. "Get the hell out!"

"Ezra . . . "

"No, I can't look at you, all that guilt!" Ezra shifted in his bed and clenched his teeth against the pain in his side and right leg.

"I'm sorry Ezra." Chris got up off the bed.

"Get out!"

"I'll come back when you calm down Ezra." Chris began to walk away from the bed towards the open doorway, he could see Josiah standing near the opening, he was listening to Ezra's anger but not stopping it.

"You can come back when you stop feeling guilty." Ezra told the reatreating back.

Chris left the room and ignored Josiah as he walked passed him, he felt the larger man begin to follow him though, he sighed and prepared himself for Josiah's demands for him to stop blaming himself for what happened to Ezra. But how could he, it was his fault, he wasn't just repeating himself, he allowed Ezra to be on his own, he never should have done that.

Josiah sat down in the chair across from Chris, he pushed the cup of coffee towards him then sat back. When Chris lifted his head he could see the guilt that Ezra was talking about. He stretched his long legs under the table then leaned back.

"There's something else Chris." Josiah told him.

"Don't you start Josiah." Chris warned him.

"I mean with Ezra, don't you see it or is your guilt blinding you." Josiah pulled his legs back towards his chair and leaned forward. "I can see a look in his eyes, it's the same as the one I saw before. For some reason he's feeling alone again."

Chris frowned and looked up into Josiah's eyes, he didn't see any guilt or anger, only understanding and concern. "Why would he feel alone? I've been with him all the time and the other guys have spent every spare minute they had with him."

"I think it may have something to do with the guilt your feeling." Josiah revealed to him. "You know he's angry about that."

"Why would my guilt make him feel lonely or even angry for that matter?" Chris needed to know.

"I don't know Chris, but I think we need to find out before it gets out of hand."

"Do you think he'll listen to me if I talk to him?" Chris asked him.

"No, not while your still feeling guilty over this." Josiah informed him. "You need to deal with your guilt Chris. I'll go and sit with Ezra while you think about what your doing to him."

Those last words cut Chris like a knife. 'What he was doing to him.' What the hell was he doing to him?

Chris looked over his shoulder to see Josiah enter the bedroom, he wish he could see Ezra's face, to look into his eyes and see the loneliness that Josiah had told him was there, again he hadn't seen it. Was he too busy thinking about himself to see what Ezra was going through. His guilt was doing something to him and hadn't seen it, Ezra was hiding it like he had hidden it before. But Josiah had seen it again, he had been the one who saw it the last time.

Josiah stood in the doorway for a moment and watched Ezra before he entered the room, Ezra looked as though he had fallen asleep again. His eyes travelled from the healing wound on his forehead down to the pale scars on his left wrist, the Doctor had removed the stitches the day before so Ezra didn't have to return to the hospital to have it done. The right wrist wasn't visible to his eye because the arm was still in a sling. The bottom of the blanket had been pulled off his broken leg, it revealed the slightly purple toes that protruded from the cast that was now covered in get well wishes and dirty jokes; that had been Buck's idea. Ezra hadn't wanted them to write on it so they did it when he was sleeping, he hadn't been impressed when he woke up. Josiah saw a grimace of pain on Ezra's face that told him was still awake. He moved to the chair that sat facing Ezra's right side, he sat down into it and expected Ezra to look to see who it was but his eyes stayed hidden behind closed eyelids.

"You okay Ezra?" Josiah waited for an answer and after a few seconds Ezra suprised him by being open with him.

"No Josiah, I'm not." Ezra turned and opened his eyes.

"You want to talk about it?" Josiah moved to the bed and sat down without causing Ezra's body any more pain.

"I can't handle the guilt he's feeling." Ezra was hesitant for a moment, he wasn't sure if he wanted to tell Josiah the whole truth so he settled for part of it.

"What else is wrong?" He saw the shock flicker through Ezra's eyes before he looked away. "I know there's something else Ezra."

"Why does Chris feel so guilty?" Ezra asked him, he knew Josiah would be truthful with him even though he himself didn't return the favour.

"You know why Ezra, he stood back and gave you some space, left you alone and this gave Loyd something to use but he manipulated it until it suited his needs."

"Josiah . . . does he care?" Ezra wouldn't look at him when he voiced what he had begun to fear.

"Yes he does, that's why he's feeling so guilty." Josiah frowned down at him. "Is that what's wrong, you don't think Chris cares?"

"I don't know Josiah, I'm confused, something that guy said to me keeps coming back. I don't want to believe it but his words won't go away."

"What did he say?" Josiah gently proded him, the last thing he wanted was for Ezra to shut him out after he'd already told him so much.

'And that's why he didn't protect you? Because he cares?' The words echoed in Ezra's mind. Did Chris allow him to leave that day because he didn't care? Did he not protect him like the others because he didn't care? They both knew that Ezra wasn't in any danger but Ezra had plenty of time to think about it lately. If he had been after one of the others he could have easily used him to get to them, he was on his own, it wouldn't have been difficult for the person to grab him and threaten him to draw the others out but it turned out that he was the one Loyd was after all the time. Chris was also feeling exactly what Loyd wanted him to feel, this also began to make Ezra feel that Chris didn't really care and it was his guilt that was making him stay so close to him now and not because he cared.

"Is there any coffee left?" Ezra changed the subject.

"Ezra, tell me." He pushed him harder.

"No, not now, I need to think about it some more."

"How can we help you if you won't tell us. Chris can't change what he's doing if he doesn't know that he's doing something wrong." Josiah wished that he had brought Chris back in with him. "It's just like last time Ezra, you wouldn't say anything and look what happened." He saw a different kind of hurt fill Ezra's eyes. "I'm sorry Ezra, I'm not blaming you for what happened, I'm talking about when you felt lonely because you wouldn't tell them how you felt, your doing it all over again but this time your not hurting just yourself, your hurting Chris as well."

"What if I tell him and he agrees with me? What he if he tells me that he doesn't care?" Josiah could see the inner child that had always been hurt, he knew that Ezra didn't want to be hurt like that again.

"Trust me Ezra, he does care."

"I'll think about it."

"Ezra."

"I'm tired Josiah."

"Okay Ezra but I'm not going to let this rest." He got up from the bed. "You get some sleep, the rest of the guys will be here soon." He saw his confusion. "It's Saturday, they're going to be here all weekend, remember?"

"No, I forgot. All weekend?" Ezra tried to lower himself into his bed.

"Are you okay with that?" Josiah smiled at him.

"I don't have a choice." Ezra grimaced.

"I'll make sure they don't crowd you Ezra, just give me one of your looks when they get to be too much for you and I'll get rid of them." Josiah assured him.

"I don't think that idea will work Josiah as I'll have that look permanently fixed to my countenance from the moment they enter this room." Ezra smiled when he thought about what they had done to him so far. "Just don't allow Buck to stay with me if I fall asleep."

Josiah stepped out of the bedroom and closed the door behind him, he knew Ezra wasn't tired, he just needed time to think about what they had just spoken about. He could feel Chris's eyes on him as soon as he left the room, he took a deep and turned to face his second hurdle.

"Did you talk to him?" Chris stood under the arch that led into the spotless kitchen.

"He thinks you don't care." Josiah stated bluntly.

"Why the hell would he think that!?" Chris growled at him. He had done everything he could do to prove to Ezra that he did care.

"Let's go into the lounge room, the last thing I want him to hear is your anger!" Josiah pushed him away from the kitchen towards one of the sofa's in the lounge room. "Loyd said something to him, Ezra wouldn't tell me what and I think that whatever it was has gotten into Ezra's mind, it's making him believe that you didn't care and that you still don't."

"But I do care Josiah, I told him that." Chris couldn't believe it, he thought that it was going to be something simple but this wasn't simple.

"I know Chris and deep down so does Ezra but this guy said something, maybe you've done something to reinforce his words without knowing it." Josiah sunk down into the sofa.

"Such as?" Chris couldn't think of anything, he had done nothing over the last two weeks to indicate to Ezra that he didn't care. "I must have done something before we found him."

Josiah lifted his eyes. "Any idea what that was?"

"No, if I knew he wouldn't be feeling like he is now." Chris sighed.

"He also doesn't want you to feel guilty, that's hurting him." Josiah added.

"You don't think that they have something to do with each other do you?" Chris asked him. "The guilt that I'm feeling and the fact that he thinks I don't care."

"Could be, I'll give him some time and try to talk to him again later." Josiah replied.

Ezra listened to the voices as they passed his bedroom, they became whispers as they got closer then louder as they moved into the living room. He could hear Buck asking if he was asleep, and Nathan's questions of concern. He wanted to leave his sick bed and go out there to greet them, to answer their questions himself. Maybe later. Ezra was jerked out of his silent musings by a knock on his bedroom door, he didn't answer but the person chose to enter his room anyway. He watched as Nathan popped his head around the corner, he couldn't help but return the smile the ex-medic gave him.

"How are you feeling Ezra?" Nathan asked him as he walked into the room and headed towards the bed.

"I hurt all over, well half of me does." Ezra admitted.

"Josiah's making you some breakfast, you can have something to help you deal with the pain after you eat it." Nathan smiled at the disgust that appeared on his face.

"Nathan can you help me sit up, I'm sick of being in this position." Nathan put his hands under Ezra's arms while the southerner pushed with his left foot. Ezra gritted his teeth against the pain in his leg and side.

"Comfortable?" Nathan asked him while he adjusted the pillow under his plastered leg.

"Yes thanks." Ezra nodded towards the door. "Is everyone out there?"

"Yeah, you want to see them?" Nathan asked him.

"Good lord no!" Ezra said a little too quickly. "I mean . . . ," he could see Nathan's smile, "I know they mean well Nathan and that they're trying to make up for what happened before but they can be a little too much at times."

"I understand Ezra, I won't let them in all at once." Nathan settled into the chair and watched Ezra. "So how are things going with Chris?"

"Fine." Ezra turned his head and looked out of his window.

Nathan heard the change of tone, and saw the change of his facial expression before his poker face fell into place.

"Is he as bad as I was?" Nathan asked him.

"No one can smother with concern as much as you Nathan." He turned back and smiled at the larger man to show him there was no malice behind his words.

"Then what is it?"

"It's nothing Nathan." Ezra lied.

"I don't believe you." Nathan retorted.

"Then believe me when I say that I don't want to talk about it."

"I won't believe that either." Nathan smiled at him. "I know you want to talk about it Ezra, I can see it in your eyes, must be the pain, you can't hide everything like you usually do." Nathan stood up. "I'll go and get Chris and you can tell him what's bothering you."

"Not now Nathan."

"Yes now Ezra, you shouldn't be going through this emotional pain as well as the physical, you need to get it off your chest." Nathan walked away from him.

"I won't talk to him alone." Ezra knew he couldn't do that, what if Chris agreed with him.

"You want me to come back?" Nathan turned around after he opened the door.

"No offense Nathan but I talked to Josiah already, he has an idea of what the problem is." Ezra didn't want to make him angry by saying no.

"That's okay Ezra, whatever is easier for you." Nathan smiled at him and left the room.

"Thanks Nathan." Ezra whispered.

He was grateful that he had finally found people that cared about him and that he could eventually allow them to get close to him, he just needed to sort out how Chris really felt about him. He hadn't wanted to believe what Loyd said but he couldn't get the nagging doubt out of his mind. He looked back at the door when it opened, Chris and Josiah entered and made their way to the bed. Chris sat in the chair and Josiah took a position on the bed next to him.

"Nathan said you wanted to talk to me." Chris shifted in his seat, he needed to know what was bothering Ezra, he just hoped that it wasn't something that he had done to make the southerner feel worse.

"No." Ezra saw the dissapointment in Chris's face. "Nathan wanted me to talk to you, you know how persuasive he can be."

"But I want you to want to talk to me Ezra, not because someone is forcing you to." Chris got up out of the chair, he didn't know what he was doing.

"Why are you giving him what he wanted?" Ezra asked Chris before he could leave the room.

"Give who what?" Chris was confused, he turned around to look at Ezra.

"Sit down Chris." Josiah ordered him, he gripped Ezra's hand to give him the support he needed.

"The guilt, why are you giving Loyd the guilt that he wanted?" Ezra could feel Josiah's hand but didn't pull away from him.

"I'm not giving him anything Ezra." Chris didn't know where this was coming from.

"He wanted you to feel guilty for leaving me alone, for not protecting me. And your doing what he wanted, your feeling guilty for those reasons. Your reacting the way he wanted you to react. Do you have any idea what that's doing to me?" Ezra's voice rose with his anger.

"No I don't Ezra, tell me."

"I told him that he was wrong, that you wouldn't feel guilty, and I thought that because you told me that you cared." He felt Josiah's grip tighten.

"I do care Ezra, I always have."

"Then why do you feel guilty?" But he didn't give him a chance to answer. "Is it because he was right, you feel the guilt that he felt because you don't care."

"That's not true Ezra, I don't feel the same guilt that he felt, it's different." Chris began to tell him but Ezra interrupted him.

"But I don't see anything different, I see what he wants everytime I look at you. Your feeling his guilt and that's telling me that you don't care."

"I'm feeling guilty for putting you in such a vunerable position in the first place, I'm feeling guilty because I made you think that I didn't care when you were hurt in that car accident with Vin, I gave Loyd what he wanted then not what he wants now. I gave you to him, if I had been more honest about the way I felt he wouldn't have gone after you."

"He said you didn't protect me because you don't care, you allowed me to be on my own." Ezra told him.

"To be honest Ezra, I didn't think that he would go after you. I didn't think that he would use someone he thought I didn't care about to get to the others." Chris looked down at his hands. "It had nothing to do with not caring and everything to do with the way I thought Loyd was thinking."

"Chris, all this guilt your feeling, it makes me think you don't care, I feel like your here because of the guilt and not because you care."

"I care Ezra." Chris repeated.

"Then prove it to me! Stop feeling guilty like he wanted you too and start caring!" Ezra growled at him. "I don't want to see his guilt anymore!"

"It's not his guilt, it's mine."

"It may be yours but it's what he wanted. Why won't you understand that!" Ezra was becoming agitated.

"And how am I supposed to get rid of the guilt! It is my fault that he hurt you." Chris retaliated.

"By not blaming yourself!" Ezra yelled at him.

"Ezra calm down." Josiah soothed him.

"No! He won't understand!"

"I do understand Ezra, you think I'm feeling guilty for the same reason he did, I'm sorry." Chris looked up at him. "And your right I can't take all the blame for this, we're all partly responsible."

"No blame what so ever Chris." Ezra told him. "I don't want you to blame yourself or feel guilty."

Chris nodded.

"What the hell were you going to do if I died?" Ezra asked him seriously.

"He's got a point Chris, you told me yourself you wouldn't have coped with Ezra's death." Josiah confirmed what Ezra was saying.

"You wouldn't have coped because of your guilt or because you cared?" Ezra raised his eyebrows at him.

"Both actually." Chris smiled at him.

Ezra smiled in return when he saw that some of the guilt had left Chris's eyes, he didn't expect it to disappear straight away but this was a start.

"You feel better now Ezra?" Josiah asked him.

"Yeah, I do. I'm sorry Chris but I just couldn't get past what he said." Ezra apologised.

"It's not your fault Ezra." Chris told him.

"It's not yours either Chris."

"Okay, that's it, I've had enough!" Josiah spoke to both of them. "Your getting to sloppy for me, I'm leaving."

"Your the one that's sitting on my bed and holding my hand Josiah." Ezra said innocently.

"Yeah well, that was for you Ezra." Josiah stood up and gave a manly cough and straightened his shirt. "I know how emotional you can get."

"Me?"

"Yeah you." Chris agreed with Josiah's statement.

"I hope you know that I have a very calm exterior." Ezra boasted.

"Could have fooled us." Chris laughed.

All three of them turned at the sound of someone knocking on the door, it opened slighty and a white handerchief was waved around in the air by two fingers.

"It's safe." Chris couldn't hide his smile. "Calm exterior huh?"

"They were obviously listening at the door." Ezra shot back at him.

Buck followed the white material into the room and everyone one else followed when they also knew it was safe.

"Everything okay?" Nathan asked.

"It's fine thanks Nathan." Ezra told him.

"We weren't sure when everything went quite." Buck informed them. "Thought that maybe one of you had killed the other. What was that all about anyway?"

"Guilt Buck and speaking of which, we need to have a little talk about the way your feeling." Chris winked at Ezra then began to drag Buck out of the room.

"Why don't you guys keep Ezra company while I go and get his breakfast for him." Josiah suggested.

"Sure thing Josiah." JD sat down in the chair and began to bombard Ezra with questions about how he was feeling.

Josiah moved to the door but looked back at Ezra, he was staring back at him with the look they had agreed on. Josiah just smiled back at him and closed the door, he knew he would pay for that later but at the moment Ezra needed his friends, he needed to be with people who cared about him.

The End

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ATF/AU Fan Fiction