I just realized that I hadn't updated this page in well over
a year, so here's a little something I posted today (
Originally I had planned to use a fake name, but ultimately
decided that I'm too proud of it to give all the credit to my dog.
-B
- - - - -
Dear Senator Brownback,
I am writing to you today to express my disappointment with
the level of decency in this year's Superbowl halftime show.
Unlike other constituents you may have heard from recently,
I am not bothered by the "phallic guitar" incident that occurred near
the end of Prince's performance. Let's
face it: a guitar is, by its very
nature, a phallic instrument. And as a
music aficionado, I do not think it would be reasonable to ban guitar playing
altogether. For similar reasons, I also
do not think that flute playing should be banned.
Instead, I am writing to you to complain that this year's Superbowl
halftime show was decent at best. To be
sure, it was a hundred times better than last year's tired performance by the
Rolling Stones. It was also far better
than Billy Joel's toady rendition of "The Star Spangled Banner." But seriously, that's not saying much.
More than anything, I feel it is completely indecent that
the artist formerly known as The Artist Formerly Known As
Prince was allowed to leave the stage last Sunday without singing
"Raspberry Beret." I will
admit that he delivered excellent (albeit abbreviated) versions of "Let's
Go Crazy" and "Purple Rain," and I can certainly understand why
he was not allowed to perform some of his more salacious songs, such as
"Sexy Motherfucker" or "Pussy Control." However, I simply cannot understand why his
groundbreaking work on the 1985 LP "Around the World in a Day"
continues to remain so overlooked.
Let us not forget that the same album brought us a single
entitled "
God shed His grace
on thee
Keep the children
free
In conclusion, I can only pray that you will use the power
of your office to ensure that the halftime show at Superbowl XLII will be even
more decent than this year's. For
example, could we really go wrong with Weird Al Yankovic?
Sincerely yours,
Brian D.
Moss
PS Please don't tell
Billy Joel what I said about him.