Don’t consecrate me
Just violate me
Take me off that pedestal
I want your dirty love tonight
Don’t memorialize me
Don’t say I’m better than I am
Take me off that shelf and use me
I want your dirty love tonight
Can’t you see I’m the same as you
I’m not the Virgin Mary
Take me down and dust me off
I want your dirty love tonight
Don’t love me tender
Don’t love me true
Take me out of the sun and back into the dark
I want your dirty love tonight
I don’t want to be your friend
I don’t want to be your life
I want to be thrown down on your floor
I want your dirty love tonight
Marleenuh 2/25/99
Billy Joe and Kurt Cobain
Meeting under the table again,
In a pub late Saturday night.
Billy and Kurt both high as a kite.
Hey there Billy, said Kurt Cobain,
Let me tell you about my pain.
Let me tell you about dying young,
About missing love and missing fun.
It’s like this lad, when I was your age
I felt like an animal trapped in a cage.
Misunderstood in all that I did,
Friends thinking I’m crazy in my head.
Beautiful women were never around.
My guitar was my lover, to it I was bound.
My music - my dreams, my heart and soul.
Without music, I could never be whole.
Music’s a love you can’t buy, a love you can’t borrow,
With no thoughts for the future, no hope for tomorrow.
An unyielding mistress, I had no choice.
She took over my life, took over my voice.
The only way out of my cage I could see
Was my death. I thought that would set me free.
Now I’m beyond passion and beyond pain.
I’ve reached Nirvana, said Kurt Cobain.
So Billy Joe, you want to follow me.
You want to play your guitar, you want to be free.
I know you have talent, I know you can play,
But you can’t follow me lad, not today.
You must go your own way, make your own path,
Play your own music, never forget how to laugh.
And sit under the table with me now and again,
My friend Billy Joe, said Kurt Cobain.
Marlene 3/9/98
EXTOL
A man stands there, smooth skin is bare
Cold eyes of gray steel and wild black hair
Nerves tightly wound, stands proud and tall
From his ruler’s position, he looks down on us all
Strong shoulders support the world and its sorrows
He holds back the past, brings forward tomorrows
What does he see as he stands there
What visions come from the dark night air
A vision of her, beauty misunderstood
Of purity and innocence and all that is good
This angelic vision is what he sees
This woman-child brings him to his knees
Marlene 3/16/98
*LOL*
I think I’m in love
With an Internet man
With a long coaxial cable
And a mouse in his hand
His dark eyes glow
With computer light
And his gentle fingers
Touch the keyboard just right
The prose he has written
Makes me laugh and cry
I print it and read it
In bed with a sigh
In the morning I’ll find him
In the chat room I’ll stay
But go home alone with my thoughts
At the end of the day
On my e-mail at work
He sends me flowers and cards
And we write to each other
About what’s in our hearts
Although physically we may never
Confirm our crush
We have made love mentally
Our minds have touched
Marlene 2/19/98
A man to make me sin
Soft voice weaving spells
That’s Sebastian
A boy with a wicked grin
Laughter like hell’s bells
That’s Sebastian
Quick wink and I’m drawn in
Green eyes that quell
That’s Sebastian
Cool kiss upon my skin
Finger tip burns trails
That’s Sebastian
My heart and soul to him
He saved me from myself
My Sebastian
Marlene 08-28-98
Hey boy
Slide on over here
Melt me
Use your charms
Lucky me
Just look at you
Imagine being
Wrapped in your arms
Hey boy
Don’t just sit and stare
Like a deer
Caught in the light
Come on baby
Do you have a map
Cause
I’m lost in your eyes tonight
Hey boy
Nice shoes
Do you wanna fuck?
Wait, I have another line…
Hi there
I’m new in town
Can you give me
Directions to your house
Shy boy
Take a chance
I promise
I won’t bite
Try boy
Open up to romance
Ask me
I guarantee I might
Too late boy
My man is here
You better find
Another place to stand
Goodbye boy
Give it a few years
And don’t worry
You’ve still got your hand
Marlene 2/15/99
I kiss you
I can’t control the degree
Of desire and intensity
That burn through me
I kiss you
And I lose myself
Lose sense of time
Close the world out
I kiss you
It’s a struggle for power
But it’s always me
In the end devoured
Marlene 08-28-98
Be my foundation
Help me build my confidence
Until I am stable and strong
Be my cornerstone
Binding me to my roots and my past
Never letting me forget who I am
Be my stair step
Encourage me to always climb higher
To bridge the gap of my past and my future
Be my keystone
Balancing my ups and my downs
A constant central point
Be my window
Throw open the shutters of my mind
Eyes to see the world
Be my door way
To try the new, explore the unknown
But always be open should I need to return
Be my garden
Let beauty and wildness into my soul
My happiness to define who I am
Be my home
Full of comfort, peace and love
A safe haven from life’s storms
Marlene 8-28-98
I sit in my chair
As it faces the world
This show is free
My legs are slung up
‘Cross the rounded arm
My back leans comfortably
I watch life in the hood
A first run movie
It passes in front of me
Each person an actor
Each role has been earned
They play unwittingly
My chair’s a safe haven
Free from eyes that pry
I kick up my feet
I sit in my chair
As the world passes by
And laugh at each deed
Marlene 1/26/98
Last night your laughter came to me,
For the first time in my memory.
It struck a chord deep in my soul.
That’s when I knew you’d make me whole.
It seems an eternity that I have waited,
A self-imprisonment I had created.
As to the way out I had no clue,
No thought, no dream that it would be you.
Are we lost in each other or are we found,
Is love truly blind or is sight finally unbound.
Our eyes met once and now you’re here.
My prison’s gone, my pathway’s clear.
It’s toward the sun now that I walk,
Soon to flight like a wild hawk.
You’re traveling with me side by side,
Hand in hand. Our hearts our guide.
Last night your laughter came to me.
You’ve made me whole. You’ve set me free.
Marlene 2/10/98
The illusion is broken
Now you stand bare
Faults visible to the eye
Your perfection is gone
Yet I don’t care
My love refuses to die
You were once exquisite
Now you’re called fair
But that did not break your pride
Your beauty has changed
Though men still stare
They don’t see what’s inside
It’s your heart and your soul
And the toss of your hair
A beauty the world can’t hide
Marlene 09-08-98
The mountain peaks break through the cloud cover
Arching like breasts of an enraptured lover
Proud in the late evening for all to see
No semblance of shame or modesty
Twilight is sneaking its way into night
Slowly pulling its dark cloak to protect from sight
The Mother’s creatures that sleep all day
To wake up in darkness and go out to play
The crystalline snow ices over with cold
The rocks slowly give up the warmth they can’t hold
Air clarifies and holds its breath
Surroundings become quiet and still as death
This is the moment for which nature lives
To wipe the slate clean, inhumanities forgive
In this one special moment, I’ve felt a rebirth
Joining body and heart and soul with the earth
Marlene 02-98
Children on an island
Children shaped by circumstance
Children that know about pain
Children that don’t stand a chance
I am a child
Without innocence
I am a child
Born to a life of pain
You are the boy next door
You are my steady anchor
You are my sea and shore
Without you I’d drown
I am a child
I am still waiting to grow
I am a child
Be my teacher
We are both the same
Innocents steeped in pain
You and I are both still searching
Wanting, needing each other
I am a child
Find me, I am hiding
I am a child
Teach me to swim
Marlene
03-23-99
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