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      Actually, nobody wants to swim with sharks. It is not an acknowledged sport,
      and it is neither enjoyable nor exhilarating. These instructions are written
      primarily for the benefit of those who, by virtue of their occupation, find that
      they must swim and find that the water is infested with sharks.

      It is of obvious importance to learn that the waters are shark infested before
      commencing to swim. It is safe to assume that this initial determination has
      already been made. If the waters were clearly not shark infested, this would be
      of little interest or value. If the waters were shark infested, the naive swimmer
      is by now probably beyond help; at the very least he has doubtless lost any
      interest in learning how to swim with sharks.

      Finally, swimming with sharks is like any other skill: it cannot be learned from
      books alone; the novice must practice in order to develop the skill. The
      following rules simply set forth the fundamental principles which, if followed,
      will make it possible to survive while becoming expert through practice.

Rules

        1.ASSUME UNIDENTIFIED FISH ARE SHARKS.
           Not all sharks look like sharks, and some fish which are not sharks
           sometimes act like sharks. Unless you have witnessed docile behavior in
           the presence of shed blood on more than one occasion, it is best to assume
           an unknown species is a shark. Inexperienced swimmers have been badly
           mangled by assuming that docile behavior in the absence of blood indicates
           that the fish is not a shark.

        2.DO NOT BLEED.
           It is a cardinal principle that if you are injured either by accident or by
           intent you must not bleed. Experience shows that bleeding prompts an
           even more aggressive attack and will often provoke the participation of
           sharks which are uninvolved or, as noted above, are usually docile.

           Admittedly, it is difficult not to bleed when injured. Indeed, at first this
           may seem impossible. Diligent practice, however, will permit the
           experienced swimmer to sustain a serious laceration without bleeding
           and without even exhibiting any loss of composure. The hemostatic
           reflex can in part be conditioned, but there may be constitutional aspects
           as well. Those who cannot learn to control their bleeding should not
           attempt to swim with sharks, for the peril is too great.

           The control of bleeding has a positive protective element for the
           swimmer. The shark will be confused as to whether or not his attack has
           injured you, and confusion is to the swimmer's advantage. On the other
           hand, the shark may know he has injured you and be puzzled as to why
           you do not bleed or show distress. This also has a profound effect on
           sharks. They begin questioning their own potency or, alternatively,
           believe the swimmer to have supernatural powers.

        3.COUNTER ANY AGGRESSION PROMPTLY.
           Sharks rarely attack a swimmer without warning. Usually there is some
           tentative, exploratory aggressive action. It is important that the
           swimmer recognizes that this behavior is a prelude to an attack and
           takes prompt and vigorous remedial action. The appropriate
           countermove is a sharp blow to the nose. Almost invariably this will
           prevent a full-scale attack, for it makes clear that you understand the
           shark's intentions and are prepared to use whatever force is necessary
           to repel his aggressive actions.

           Some swimmers mistakenly believe that an ingratiating attitude will
           dispel an attack under these circumstances. This is not correct, such a
           response provokes a shark attack. Those who hold this erroneous view
           can usually be identified by their missing limbs.

        4.GET OUT IF SOMEONE IS BLEEDING.
           If a swimmer (or shark) has been injured and is bleeding, get out of the
           water promptly. The presence of blood and the thrashing of water will
           elicit aggressive behavior even in the most docile of sharks. This latter
           group, poorly skilled in attacking, often behaves irrationally and may
           attack uninvolved swimmers or sharks. Some are so inept that in the
           confusion they injure themselves.

           No useful purpose is served in attempting to rescue the injured
           swimmer. He either will or will not survive the attack, and your
           intervention cannot protect him once blood has been shed. Those who
           survive such an attack rarely venture to swim with sharks again, an
           attitude which is readily understandable.

           The lack of effective countermeasures to a fully developed shark attack
           emphasizes the importance of the earlier rules.

        5.USE ANTICIPATORY RETALIATION.
           A constant danger to the skilled swimmer is that the sharks will forget
           that he is skilled and may attack in error. Some sharks have notoriously
           poor memories in this regard. This memory loss can be prevented by a
           program of anticipatory retaliation. The skilled swimmer should engage
           in these activities periodically, and the periods should be less than the
           memory span of the shark. Thus, it is not possible to state fixed
           intervals. The procedure may need to be repeated frequently with
           forgetful sharks and need be done only once for sharks with total recall.

           The procedure is essentially the same as described under rule 3 -- a
           sharp blow to the nose. Here, however, the blow is unexpected and
           serves to remind the shark that you are both alert and unafraid.
           Swimmers should take care not to injure the shark and draw blood
           during this exercise for two reasons: First, sharks often bleed profusely,
           and this leads to the chaotic situation described under rule 4. Second, if
           swimmers act in this fashion it may not be possible to distinguish
           swimmers from sharks. Indeed, renegade swimmers are far worse than
           sharks, for none of the rules or measures described here is effective in
           controlling their aggressive behavior.

        6.DISORGANIZE AN ORGANIZED ATTACK.
           Usually sharks are sufficiently self-centered that they do not act in
           concert against a swimmer. This lack of organization greatly reduces the
           risk of swimming among sharks. However, upon occasion the sharks
           may launch a coordinated attack upon a swimmer or even upon one of
           their number. While the latter event is not of particular concern to a
           swimmer, it is essential that one know how to handle shark attack
           directed against a swimmer.

           The proper strategy is diversion. Sharks can be diverted from their
           organized attack in one of two ways. First, sharks as a group are
           especially prone to internal dissension. An experienced swimmer can
           divert an organized attack by introducing something, often something
           minor or trivial, which sets the sharks to fighting among themselves.
           Usually by the time the internal conflict is settled the sharks cannot even
           recall what they were setting about to do, much less get organized to do it.

           A second mechanism of diversion is to introduce something which so
           enrages the members of the group that they begin to lash out in all
           directions, even attacking inanimate objects in their fury.

           What should be introduced? Unfortunately, different things prompt
           internal dissension or blind fury in different groups of sharks. Here one
           must be experienced in dealing with a given group of sharks, for what
           enrages one group will pass unnoted by another.

           It is scarcely necessary to state that it is unethical for a swimmer under
           attack by a group of sharks to counter the attack by diverting them to
           another swimmer. It is, however, common to see this done by novice
           swimmers and by sharks when they fall under a concerted attack.

This is a shark :-  His name is Dave
This is not a Shark :-  This is an Anchovy It's called Dave.

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