Falstaff's
"Joke
of the Week"
Here's your
joke for the week of Nov 29th.
Your contributions are welcome!
Please email them to:
wf_arpeggio@yahoo.com
A farmer buys several pigs, hoping to
breed them for ham and bacon. After several weeks, he notices that
none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and calls a Vet for help. The Vet
tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer
doesn't have the slightest idea what this means, but not wanting to display
his ignorance, he only asks the Vet how he will know when the pigs are
pregnant. The Vet tills him that the pigs will lie down and wallow in the
mud.
The farmer hangs up and gives this some
thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means
he has to impregnate the pigs. So he loads them into his truck, drives
them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes
to bed.
Next morning he wakes up and looks out at
the pigs. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he concludes
that the first try didn't take and loads them into the truck again. He
drives them out to the woods, bangs each pig twice for good measure, brings
them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes up and finds the
pigs still just standing around. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds
to load them up and drive the truck to the woods. He spends all day shagging
the pigs, and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.
The next morning, he cannot even raise
himself from the bed to look at the pigs. He asks his wife to tell him
if the pigs are lying in the mud.
"No," she says, "they're all in the truck and one of them's honking the
horn."