Under Orders 5: Paint By Numbers
Batela

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The door opened and Skinner heard the sound of bags dropping to the floor.

"Dana?" he called out from his study.

"Yes. Are you busy?"

He got up and went to the entrance.

"What's all this?" he asked, carrying the bags into the living room.

"Paints, brushes and canvas." Scully replied, dumping out the contents.

"Since when do you paint?"

"Anybody can paint, Walter, just pick up a brush and get some paint on it."

"I know that, I mean I didn't know that you had any artistic talents."

"Well, now you do. Strip."

"Excuse me?"

"Well, I need a model. Come on, off with 'em."

Skinner muttered about bossy lovers while he took his clothes off. Scully unwrapped the canvas and spread it out, humming while she worked.

"Alright, stand like this, no come on, just stand straight, loosen up."

"This had better not be hung in the Hoover building, Dana."

"Front lobby, Walter. Shush, let me work."

"Dana, what are you doing?"

"Oh be quiet, let me concentrate."

He tried to stand still.

"Oh now look what you've made me do, a green streak on your cheek. Hmm, that could work, let's see. Yes, a little esoteric, maybe." Scully dipped her brush deep into the green paint.

"Dana? Why are you using the green for my chest hair?"

"Because, I like a mossy carpet in the forest, it's soft and it smells good. When I lay down on you, that's what your chest hair reminds me of."

"A mossy carpet, I see."

Hum hum hum la la de da.....

"Dana? Why are you using gray for my nipples?"

"When they're hard, they're like little pebbles, pebbles are gray."

"Gray pebbles on a mossy green carpet, alright, I guess that makes sense."

Doobie doobie do da da...

"Dana? There are red swirls shooting up from my groin."

"Oooh, Walter, the things you say. The red represents the fire and passion in you. Hold still."

Sha la la......

"Dana? You've got my pubic hair brown."

"Well, Walter, your hair is brown, let's get real here."

Baby baby baby let's investigate......

"Dana? Why purple for my penis?"

"Because, the harder it gets, the more purple it gets."

"It gets dark purple, Dana, not lavender."

"Do you wanna do this?"

......the other side of life...

"Dana? You're getting purple all over your mouth. Dana? Dana...I hope that paint is non-toxic."

"It's body paint, Walter, of course it's non-toxic."

"Don't talk with your mouth full, Dana."

THE END