You Know You're Obsessed With Labyrinth When...

(The ones in purple are the ones I've done!)

 

1. You unconsciously start running whenever you listen to "Into The Labyrinth".
2. You yourself dress in red-striped pajamas in hopes of Jareth coming for you.
3. You not only say "Ello" to worms, but you expect them to say "Ello" back.
4. You buy children’s coloring books in hopes of finding a map to the Labyrinth.
5. You buy David Bowie's CDs and play them backwards for secret messages telling you how to get to the Labyrinth.
6. You've read all three of these lists.
7. You bought a peach-scented candle, for obvious reasons, but also because it said 'Sarah' on the label. (My mom found it for me :)
8. You learn how to say "the Words" in 62 different languages just in case Jareth is in a foreign country at the time.
9. You have gone to school dressed as Sarah.
10. You refuse to go to school UNLESS you are dressed as Sarah.
11. You have written a play based on Labyrinth and almost convinced your school to put it on (That one is true!).
12. You religiously celebrate the thirteenth of each month by eating a peach and buying a plastic bracelet.
13. You dress up as Jareth for Halloween, even though you have to put up with people not knowing who you are; even worse people thinking that you are Tina Turner!
14. Your best friend gives you socks to "complete" the Jareth outfit.
15. You have a Labyrinth party and invite all your friends, especially the ones who have *gasp* never seen it, serve peach ice cream, a maze-decorated cake, and make a giant mural to decorate.
16. You accept promotion to manager of a huge video store with no pay raise because NOW you can pick the movie shown on the 8 televisions and played loudly through storewide surround-sound speakers. *drewl* You haven't been in heaven until you've got an entire STORE full of people saying 'Hey, isn't this Labyrinth? This is the best movie EVER!" with all that wonderful music flowing from EVERYWHERE. (Oh, and Jareth to the 8th power isn't all that bad either. *sly wink*)
17. Your friends roll there eyes when you pull your Labyrinth sound track from your purse and ask if anyone has headphones. (Happened to me once, too!)
18. You do an article on the Labyrinth for your school's newspaper. (guilty)
19. You dress like you're in the 80's just cause it makes you feel like a Goblin Queen.
20. You want to smack Sarah around for refusing Jareth.
21. Your Senior quote was "Screw the baby, I'm going with David Bowie."
22. You send stuff to this list.
23. You have 8 million bookmarks for Labyrinth web sites on your computer.
24. You subscribe to Bowienet, just so you can tell him "Atomic Fireballs" ripped off "Magic Dance"
25. You have an e-mail address with a character's name. (Kinda…)
26. Your favorite fruit is peaches, hoping for that poison one.
27. Your co-workers think your crazy. (Which goes without saying *wink*)
28. You finally find the movie after years of searching, go into a fit of hysterics, and start quoting lines and damning Sarah at your work place.
29. You wish David Bowie looked like Jareth in all his movies.
30. You develop an alter ego and start telling all your friends that you are the Goblin Queen!
31. You are the Goblin Queen, really!
32. You discuss the deeper meaning to Labyrinth with total strangers on the city bus.
33. Total strangers on the bus know what you are talking about and join in, soon even the driver is yapping about how she thinks Sarah was less than smart. (actually happened.)
34. You make your own Labyrinth T-shirts with your printer and a couple of tee-shirt transfer. (guilty.)
35. Then wear them to school, announcing once again that "You are the Goblin Queen."
36. Your watched your copy of a copy on your old Beta Max until it blew up.
37. You ask your dad if he wants to here your list and he tells you, "Good God, I'm just about 'Labyrinthed' out."
38. You watch the movie at lunchtime at school instead of eating lunch, except when they have peaches.
39. Somebody at a party asks if you'd like a piece of cake, and you wince and start glancing round nervously.
40. Your Biology assignment was based on watching the movie.
41. You spend all day in the Chemistry Lab trying to add "drugs" to peaches.
42. Every circular object you find, you need to buy.
43. You were practically dying for Rosie to ask David Bowie/Jennifer Connelly something Labyrinth-related. (I really only saw Jenny; heard about David being on…)
44. You work in a castle.
45. It has spiral staircases and you often run up them expecting to find the Escher room.
46. You paraphrase the movie constantly - and the worst bit is you don't even realize half the time. (The thing with me is, I know I'm doing it ;)
47. You no longer need to watch the movie because I know every bit of every scene by heart.
48. You do just for the hell of it :)
49. You favorite earrings were silver dangly ones (guess which ones they look like?) until they broke because you wore them too much.
50. Your only bracelet is plastic and beaded.
51. You grew your hair long (its very dark brown).
52. At the time you were 15, your favorite clothes were: a loose flowing shirt, waistcoat and jeans. (Until they died because you wore them too much.)
53. David Bowie won’t return your phone calls.
54. Jennifer Connelly won’t return your phone calls.
55. You’re going to watch JC’s new show, "The $treet", in hopes that David Bowie will make a guest appearance…
56. You and your father stay up till 3:00 a.m. coming up with a Labyrinth 2.
57. You and your father actually come up with a script for Labyrinth 2.
58. Your parents come home from somewhere and ask if you're home, you reply, " Yeah, yes I'm home."
59. You actually have your dad watching "Inside The Labyrinth" with you.
60. You wear out the beta-max of Labyrinth, buy the VHS tape and wear it out, till you need another copy (actually happened).
61. You go on eBay and search for Labyrinth and then buy strange memorabilia at 2 a.m.
62. You OD on peaches, hoping to hallucinate about a ballroom.
63. Someone wants Japanese for dinner, you shout, “OH, MY ACHING SUSHI!”
64. You spend hours at the costume jewelry shop, thinking about what Hoggle would like.
65. You get kicked out for being a lunatic because you innocently inquired about a watch with 13 numbers on it.
66. Someone forgets to take out the trash or change baby’s diaper, you politely remind them by screaming, “SMELL BAD!”
67. You write so much fanfic and send so much e-mail about LABYRINTH and its King that your computer explodes.
68. The “keep out” sign on your room is a copy of Sir Didymus’ oath.
69. You either smile and wave (or scream and flee in terror) every time you see a white owl.
70. Someone says, “It’s not fair!” you say, “That’s right! It’s not fair! And that’s only half of it!”
71. Someone says, “It’s not fair!” you say, “You say that so often. I wonder what your basis for comparison is.”
72. Someone wants you to do something you don’t want, you retort, “You have no power over me!”
73. Someone says, “Oh, nothing . . .” you say, “Nothing? Nothing? Nothing? Nothing, tra la la?”
74. Someone talks too low, you say, “Mumble, mumble, mumble. You’re a wonderful conversationalist.”
75. You review French verbs, you make it a constant point to remind the teacher of the word ‘oubliette’.
76. Every time your brother or sister is annoying, etc., you threaten them with the Bog of Eternal Stench.
77. You liven up dances and parties (and maybe the talent show) by singing “Magic Dance.”
78. Every time you see a crystal, you either grab it, hoping to see your dreams, or smash it in terror.
79. Every time your brother or sister is bad, you warn them, “Don’t defy me.”
80. Someone wants either you or your friends’ help, or complains that you are not helping, say, “What do you mean, help? We are helping. We’re helping hands.”
81. You get something you want, or persuade someone to do something, and you say, "There go a couple of suckers."
82. Someone either gets a question right or states something obvious, you say, "How's that for brainpower?"
83. Someone tells you to be quiet, you say, "Aw, nuts."
84. You do all the talking or thinking for someone, you remark, "It's so stimulating being your hat."
85. Someone suggests or says something stupid, you say,  "Aye! Will you listen to this crap?!"
86. You are wrong about something, you say, "Well, can't be right all the time."
87. Your dog runs away, you scream, "If you don't turn around this second, I will never feed you again!"
88. You and a friend are ganged up by a lot of bullies, you confidently say, "I think we have them surrounded.  Throw down your weapons and I'll see that you're well treated."
89. After you and your friend make mincemeat out of the above- mentioned bullies, you advise them, "Next time, surrender!"
90. You have a deathly fear of old bridges.
91. Your pets know all the lines to LABYRINTH.
92. You link one or more school papers to LABYRINTH.
93. Every time you see a worm you stop and wait for it to invite you to tea.
94. You name your pets after LABYRINTH characters.
95. You name other people’s children and pets after LABYRINTH characters.
96. You sing LABYRINTH songs for the Talent Show, then threaten to throw the audience into the BOES (Bog Of Eternal Stench) when they boo you.
97. You’d be willing to date Jareth.
98. You cry for three week when you realize you can’t.
99. You spend hours on the ’net looking for David Bowie’s address.
100. You’d be willing to date David Bowie.
101. You cry for three weeks when you realize you can’t.
102. You put out a death warrant on anyone who dares to say that Jareth got what he deserved.
103. You put out another death warrant on anyone who dares ask, “What’s LABYRINTH?” and “Who’s Jareth?”
104. You threaten to sue the jewelry store when they say they don’t have Jareth’s amulet.
105. Then you threaten the same when the jeweler when he asks who the heck is Jareth.
106. You write letters to David Bowie with TO THE GOBLIN KING on the envelope.
107. Then you mail them.
108. David answers you.
109. In character.
110. Or out (what the heck, he answered!).
111. You scour shops for a copy of Escher’s Relativity.
112. Then you have a fit when it doesn’t come alive so you can have fun running up and down all those stairs.
113. You invoke the help of the goblins…constantly.
114. You invoke the help of Jareth…constantly.
115. You threaten to do something really bad when it doesn’t work.
116. You have a deathly fear of peaches, shrieking, “Get them away! I want to keep my memory!” whenever you see one.
117. You start calling your mini French poodle “Sir Didymus” instead of her real name
118. You start calling your sixteen-year-old sister with brown eyes and long brown, almost black hair, “Jennifer (Connelly)”.
119. Or, if you’re REALLY obsessed, “Sarah”.
120. At a David Bowie concert, you jump up and down screaming, “I love you, Jareth!” before the security guards haul you away for being a lunatic
121. At a David Bowie concert, if he asks for song requests, you immediately call out, “As the World Falls Down!” or any other LABY song.
122. Even if he doesn’t ask for requests.
123. Someone insults you, and you immediately retort, “Oh, yeah? Well, your mother is a freakin’ aardvark!”
124. Every time you get into trouble, you immediately scream, “Ludo! Call the rocks!”
125. You try calling them yourself.
126. A door is shut that you have to enter, and you shout, “Open up! Open up right now!”

 

I’d like to thank Anna Cotton for providing half of this List J

 

 

If you wish to send me a Sign of Obsession, feel free to do so!

ykyowlabyw@yahoo.com

 

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