The Golden Bong

BOB came to me in a vision, He looked upon me with his loving eyes , I gazed back in awe. My THC reddened orbs began to tear up, I could feel nothing. Nothing that is, except love. Peace and beauty seemed to surround my body. I couldn't think of anything to say and just at that very instant when I couldn't think of anything to say, BOB said "THOR, you are truly the 'MOST HIGH'". Then he gave me a Golden Bong. After we each did a Golden Bong hit he sent me on a quest. I'll never forget the words he said, when he said---UH--the words he said when he said,,-he said--UH-- oh yeah he said "THOR, go get us some pizza". After I walked out of the pizza store I sat down on the edge of the sidewalk and began removing the tin foil from the lasagna tray. I peeled it back slowly, carefully revealing the hot pleasures within. The sauce oozed like lava around the meaty mozzarella cheeze, and pools of oil were everywhere. I ran my fingers along the edge of the tray, and then gently through the heart of the food, delighting in the warm slippery feel of the pasta underneath. After a few minutes of working my fingers in & out; I removed them and slowly licked the sweet sauce off.
My sense of hunger was heightened, I lifted the tray closer to my face, I sank my hand into the center of my lasagna, scooping out huge globs of pasta, sauce, & cheeze. I lifted the food to my face & stuffed it sloppily into the waiting hole; I chewed & swallowed deeply, my eyes closed in extacy. My entire digestive tract tingled as the food made it's way down my esophagus & into the pit of my stomach. In a frenzy, I grabbed for the lasagna, stuffing my mouth until it was about to burst, choking it down so fast it almost hurt, & then stuffing my face again. In a matter of minutes I had lapped up the entire tray, licking it clean to get every drop.
I stood and caught my breath. After such a feast I was sure I could eat no more, But the sight of several open pizza boxes soon had me going again. Reaching out I tore off about half of a huge 15 inch pizza covered with pepperoni, mushrooms, and sausage. I folded the thick dough & thrust the pizza mouthward, alternately chewing at the crust & then sucking in the tender cheezy filling. My mind was in a blissfull daze. I spent the next several minutes in this position, until I had devoured every last bite.
By this time I needed a drink, I slid my fingers around my hard, cold Pepsi bottle, & pulled the cap off slowly with my teeth, and in one swift move I spit out the cap & turned the bottle upwards, eagerly pouring the soda down my throat. As I drank, the liquid spilled out of the corners of my mouth and dripped onto my face, neck, and clothes. Oblivious to the world I continued consuming the pop like a madman until I had milked every drop from the bottle.
Finally I could take no more. Grasping my stomach, I stumbled toward the grass on the side of the road. I opened my mouth and burped into the warm night, Longer & Louder than I had ever burped before. The substance of my belch seemed to hang in the air in front of me, thick with the aroma of pizza and Pepsi. I burped a second time then layed on the soft ground.

I closed my eyes and saw a myriad of tiny veins on the inside of my eyelids and the blood flowing through them was my blood MINE, it flowed through my liver & up around my armpits to lubricate my entire body inside. I noticed my nose, that it was growing on the front of my face, it was part of me, MINE. I squeezed it like a peice of rubber & chuckled, my laughter was musical so I laughed some more.
I pulled off my boots and wiggled my toes, they were pink and fit the ends of my feet exceedingly well. A rush of contentment laid me back & I crossed my arms behind my head, SKY that's my favorite color, the endless ebb & flow of blue was so beautiful, it brought tears to my eyes, happy drops cascaded down my cheeks to frolic in my beard, here comes a plane.

THOR

BYBLOS

It's nothing, It's just nothing
I kept saying to myself
It's just a stupid book I have sitting on my shelf
It tries to make me read it or at least that's what I think
If it sits there and I wet it
It'll proba'ly rot and stink
So I picked it up and read it
And it nearly blew my mind
It's more than just a stupid book
It's a guide for all mankind
It starts "In the beginning"
And it ends with an "AMEN"
It tells of GODS son, Jesus
How he came to save all men
It talks about forgiveness
It tells us that we've sinned
We must love a hateful neighbor
As we love a trusted friend
I've led a real hard life
I've done some awful things
But when Jesus comes to take me home
I know I've earned my wings
He's forgiven me of all my sins
Now he's living in my heart
And compared to life in heaven
This life is just the start