Not being a Christian. This is what I had to consider last year. Well, in actuality I have pondered it two, perhaps two and a half years ago. There was a point in one of my Sunday School classes(I must have been in 7th or 8th grade) when one of my friends had asked the question: "How do we know we're right?", and the response was, of course: "The Bible tells us." Then he said: "Well, what about all the other 'Christian' religions like Jehovah's Witness, Mormons, or Catholics? What if they're interpretation of the Bible is right?" Then, the reply was another simple-minded one: "We have to believe we are correct as a matter of faith." Now, this teacher might not have had all the answers, and if my friend would have asked my Pastor, he would have gotten a more intellectual response. However, I feel that this intellectual response would probably not have satisfied any curiosity.
At that point, I was a Christian, and not ready to consider asking questions such as those. I had thought it was a good question, but I had thought the teacher's answer was sufficient. Now, as time went on, I had philosophized on the nature of good and evil, and a question arose which for many years I was never satisified by any answer I was given... And I still am not satisfied with any answer(as they are all usually the same). The question was this Why are we here? Now, the reason I ask this, was because I was told that we were put on earth to worship and love God of our own free will, that the angels had no choice but to do God's bidding. But it had occurred to me that at one point(and this is the beginning of my questions): A supposed high-ranking angel named Lucifer had chosen to revolt against God. This Lucifer fellow was the highest of the high. Second only in command to God. Well, he became vain and jealous(sin???) and decided to take the post once God was dead. He gathered an army of 1/3 of the angels, and a war raged on which still rages to this day... OK, so the first battle was lost by this Lucifer guy, and God made a special place called Hell(which is a big part of my question later on...) which he sent the rebels to after they started the war. Lucifer decided to change his name to Satan(meaning the adversary), and maybe Devil, and other names throughout history.
After this fall(it's not mentioned when, but just sometime after this happened), God must have gotten a little lonely(could it be that an omnipotent, self-sustaining being would get lonely?), and needed a little lovin' and praisin'... So, he decided to make a whole world(and apparently the physical universe as we know it), and created the "highest of his creations": Man. Man(or Adham is it is in Hebrew, which also means dirt, I believe) walked with God and talked to God in the flesh. Well, Eve was created and Satan came along in the form of a serpent(which apparently had legs in those days) and tempted her to eat of a fruit(which she wasn't supposed to eat.) She did so, and saw the world in a whole new light(perhaps a little LSD was in this fruit? Maybe it's a tree that contained DiMethylTryptamine?) Well, she was like "This fuckin' rocks. Yo, Adham, get the hell over here and check this shit out..." He was like "Well... Eve... You know, the big guy, heh heh, he uh, said we umm shouldn't eat it..." After much prodding and convincing, Adham partook of the fruit. Of course, God being the omnscient and omnipresent had foreseen this even, and was even watching it as it took place. But they didn't know he was there until he took on a human form, and wandered the garden calling their name... The rest, as they say is history... Clothes, omnivorism, murder, death, thorns, floods, judgement, wrath, pain in child-birth, toiling the ground...
OK, I got a little sidetracked, but I had to give a little background information. The key to this whole story is God's desire to be loved. By a being with free will. As I mentioned, the angels supposedly had no free will, but the problem with that is... Why the hell did they choose to revolt against God if they had no choice? Well, apparently they had a choice, and could choose to love God... So, the first question I had is "Why are we here?" and it has never been satisfied to this day. Once someone tells me "to love God of our own free will" and I bring up this point, they oft reply "Well, God knows, and one day we'll find out".
Second problem I have with the story above is the claim that sin never existed until Man ate of the fruit. What about Satan and his lust for power? And speaking of Jealousy, God while he was condemning man has said "I am a Jealous God." Jealous of what? Isn't he almighty? Is he afraid that someone else would choose satan over him? Is he insecure? Isn't Jealousy a sin? Is there such a thing as righteous jealousy? Hmm... Seems to me that perhaps the Bible is an Allegory, a fable meant to tell epic stories of mankind and try to explain the world in terms the authors could understand.
OK, here's where I started to really question my beliefs. I had already thought about evolution, and had decided that it makes more sense than creation... At one point, I had asked my mother if there was no hell, would she still love God? And she answered that she would. I didn't know if I could honestly answer that, so it was a question I had to find out what the answer was. Well, after a couple years of mulling that question periodically, an epiphany happened whilst listening to a sermon in my very own church. This was the vision that I saw. I saw an angry man ready to damn someone to hell if they did not love him. And then I realized that it's a threat!!! This is what the concept of hell was. A threat to love God or no-one else. It was at that point which I had imagined an abusive, sexually frustrated man waiting to rape an innocent victim.
And I saw Him standing over me, with Strength and Power. And in his right hand was a gun whose name was Hell. And I lay there by his feet worshipping his mighty power, not because he had loved me to save me from this threat(which he alone hath created), but rather, because I had to or die.
Now, note that this threat was a threat created by God. Here is the problem I have with Hell:
First, the traditional Christian Theology of God maintains that God is
So, we see that God can do anything that is logically possible. There have been some objections to an all powerful God in that he should be able to do anything... In which case, he should be able to create a rock that was too heavy for him to lift. So, we shall assume(as is the generally accepted theological view) that God cannot do contradictory things. Contradictory things are logically impossible, and therefore God cannot do it, simply because he can only do logically possible things.
Now, we also assume the belief that God is Love. This is a statement taken right out of the Bible. And Christians would most readily agree to this statement. Now, combining these two points, we come to the conclusion that God is all powerful, and all love.
OK, we must then ask the question. If God is all love, why does he send us to hell? To which the reply is "Hell was created for Satan and his minions. Not for us. We chose hell, because we rebelled against God."
OK. So we choose to go to hell. Now, couldn't God save us from hell? Yes. In fact, he has done so through the death of his son Jesus Christ. OK, so, it is possible to escape hell. Now, if God can save us from hell, why doesn't he save everyone from hell? The common argument is that God won't violate our free will. However, there are many reported instances of people who have gone to hell(after hearing the gospel of Jesus Christ), and Jesus chose to redeem them after death... Hmm... So, redemption is possible after we die? Then, wouldn't it be possible for God to redeem us all after we die? If God is Love, and he is all powerful, and even has the ability to redeem us, why doesn't he? Of course, this takes the assumption that you believe in these Near Death Experiences(or is it After Death Experiences?) However, most dedicated fundamentalist Christians would gladly spout off these kinds of experiences as proof of an afterlife. Now, using these points we can come to these conclusions:
Stay tuned for the next installment, which is: Why I'm not an atheist(well, kinda...)