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last seen: touch toning

12 december 1996 1:06 a.m.

Menstrual cramps nothing. I was ready to saw my leg off this morning. When I was finishing up my philosophy paper last night (well, this morning, technically), I put the monitor and keyboard on the floor for the last three gruelling pages. My legs kept falling asleep, but I didn't think anything of it. Nary two hours after I'd gone to bed, though, my right leg just seized up. It was a huge, huge cramp. It'd been so long since I'd gotten one, I completely freaked. I was wide awake like that, and it hurt so bad, I wanted to scream... or cry. I felt like I was some bug under an ugly kid's magnifying glass on a sunny day, scrunched up in a ball, writhing and trying not to throw myself out of bed. All of a sudden it was like I was in some big-screen melodrama, where I had to screw up my courage and slowly straighten my leg. I practically heard the theme from "The Incredible Hulk" (is there a female equivalent?), lying there, straining to override the suddenly very compelling voice of opposition from my knee. After what seemed like an eternity, I emerged victorious. Having straightened my leg, I almost expected applause. Finally I just had to wait it out, stretched out and rigid. My thoughts consisted entirely of the chant, "Pain, pain, pain, pain..." Then I got the bright idea to count. I made it to the eighties before I could finally relax. My head was pounding. I couldn't fall asleep again. At best I dozed. As ridiculous as it sounds, I was just lying there convinced I'd just gone through something monumental (when I hadn't), and was at a total loss as to what to do about it. I felt, at least, like I should tell someone. So I am. Today, I went to Philosophy with my head bowed in shame, prepared to turn in what could possibly be the worst term paper I've written yet. When the professor got there, four people in my class leapt up and delivered a series of creative sob stories. Next thing I know, the prof gives us all a twenty-four hour extension. "Score," one might say. But that wasn't all. For what would be the last class period of the semester, the professor launched into a wrap up lecture that closely followed one of the five term paper topics we were to choose from. The one I chose. Having one extra night to work on a paper that I thought I finished really helped. With some heavy tweaking, and throwing in a couple of points discussed today, I've managed to add a whole extra page of stuff. Suddenly I feel more confident about this project than I have about most papers I've done this year. Maybe there's something to the academic "get an early start" mantra after all. One more day. My first semester as a part-time student ends tomorrow, technically. All next week is set aside for finals. I've got two on Monday, the second of which is Hawaiian. For once, there's a final exam I'm not worried about. Not like I'm a master of the language or anything, but I just feel as if I have a good grasp of everything we've been covering all semester. Besides, when it comes to languages, I figure either you get it or you don't. If my basic fascination with Hawaiian is any indication (lately I've even been trying to dissect Hawaiian music), I've most certainly got something. After hopefully not stuttering my way through the oral portion of the final, I'll then have a four day reprieve until my last final on Friday. That's the one I'm worried about. I'd like to say, "At least I'll have three full days to study," but I don't study. Knowing myself all too well, I already put myself on the schedule as a day-shift call in at work. Considering the way things have been lately, I'm pretty sure I'll be making a fair Christmas bonus for myself. My registration appointment for next semester was today, but I haven't had the time to sit down with the schedule to figure out what I need, or want. At the moment, I'm only registered for one class -- Hawaiian 102, of course. The schedule doesn't list which instructor is teaching which of the sections, but I'm hoping I'll get either the same one I had this semester or one of the two everyone seems to recommend. I didn't know until this week that Robi Kahakalau -- famed island musician, formerly of the "Hawaiian Style Band" -- is also a Hawaiian instructor. I imagine there's a lot of singing in that class. I'm pretty sure I'm going to try the part-time thing again. It'll be hard to resist the urge to drop to six credits, given how much I enjoyed the extra time and extra hours at work. Frankly, though, I'm just proud I'm set on taking classes at all.