Hello to all fellow dogs! This is THE webpage to solve those problems that have been plauging you that your owner could never even approach. I have many years experience in the field of Animal Pyschology, and I am here to help you with your troubles. Are you crazy over that cute dog in the neighbour's yard and want her to get interested in you? Wondering why your owner doesn't feed you on time? How about the best ways to detect health supplements (Yuck!) that your owner has slipped into your food? All these questions and more will be answered. E-mail me with your questions and I'll get to you soon. OOFF!! Till then, have a nice day.

Question 1 from "dog":I'm rather concerned about my owner. He keeps taking photos of me with his weird silent camera. I think he may need to get out more.

Alex's reply:Well "dog", if that is your real name. First of all, I am an ANIMAL pyschologist, meaning that above and beyond understanding you, anything else is out of my capabilities. That means human beings, meaning then your owner. However, being of the dog community, I will use my expertise to point you to a possible solution. First of all, ask yourself if you are overly concerned about your owner. How can you know this? Do you get angry when your owner feeds you late? What about if he keeps you in the house when you want to go for a pee? If you do, then you obviously do not understand the fact that we as dogs must serve the whims of human beings, and not care for our own needs( As outlined in the Canine Charter 1957). You are to picky, too fussy, and since when did you learn how to use your owner's computer? Naughty naughty, using the internet without his permission. My owner reads my mail, and types my replies for me, and all my internet usage is controlled by him. Second, what is weird to you is obviously not werid to him. That silent camera you are talking about is obviously a Leica. If you are being photographed by a Leica, thank your lucky stars, and kiss the floor. It is a great honour. And remember, like me, the Leica is German, and if you are German too, there's no reason why you can't be patriotic. One other reason is that you're beautiful, so stop complaining. Finally, as to wheather he needs to get out more, I'm sure that being a human being, he'll know what to do. Have faith in the human race my friend, after all , we are suppose to be their best friend. OOFF!!

Question 2 from Max: Alex i need your help!!!!I'm in love with the bitch next door.Any suggestions .She's a Mongrel.Will my puppies look ugly??I hope they don't.Please help me.She thinks she's not good enough for me.Can you give me some advice
Max
ps.i'm a scottish terrier.

To be answered....

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