For that moment I was lost. Turning to file myself out of the classroom was a normality to me that seemed to have no great significance, and yet this time, I was looking straight into the eyes of this lovely girl. Who was she? I’d never seen her before and yet she was only inches away, as her eyes met mine when she too turned at the same moment. I stared, she too. No detail of her face was lost to me. But those eyes that I gazed at! How beautiful they were! Their image burned a place in my memory like no one’s else, and they stared through into my mind and into all the infinite experiences that had molded me for that moment. There seemed in them a majesty that spoke of tenderness and care like that of a flower in repose, waiting for the subject of that idle talent. I imagined that during that indefinite amount of time, when feelings like this seem to stretch reality, the background gave way to swirls, mist and ill defined patterns of the others all around who were in the firm grip of reality. Yet this was my reality, now, the instant attraction seemed to say so. Seconds later a momentary embarrassment on her part made me realize the degrees to which my captivation had taken me. Her stare gave way to an inquisitive look that prompted some answer from me.
"Yes?" she asked in a quizzical tone. Having my wits not about me, my answer came only when I realized how absurd I must have been to her.
"Oh, I’m sorry", I said. I saw that my answer was not satisfactory, and so a rash moment’s deliberation prompted me to say something I would never have said were I in greater control.
"I couldn’t help but be struck by your beauty. But at the moment when it happened, I just stopped thinking". I paused for a moment. She smiled, her eyes twinkling strangely in the brightness of the classroom. She seemed to possess some kind of quiet confidence that did not take offense to the words I had just said. This surprised me, and intrigued me later when I thought more of it. By this time I was able to study her appearance more objectively. I suppose I thought this because of the extreme close distance with which I first met her eyes. She had an oval face and hazel brown eyes, with a sporty tanned complexion. The overall impression she gave me was that of a Japanese model. I didn’t know where I got that thought from but that was what struck me. Her nose was small and well formed, as was her lips, dainty and slightly cracked from the dryness of the air-conditioned room.
I licked my lips suddenly on noticing this detail. Perhaps she noticed this. I was mindful of such things, since someone had been told that such actions had a sensuality about them that was daunting on first impression.
"What’s your name? I haven’t seen you around in school before."
"WeiJann, and you?"
At the moment, I couldn’t give a long description of myself, as both our schedules demanded that we were in a predetermined classroom at that time. I gave her the basic information usually required, and she, hints on where I would likely find her later. She parted from me with a smile, and headed off in the opposite direction. I watched as she walked swiftly out of my sight. Her gait was graceful yet characteristic of the liveliness that youth had bestowed on her. I saw that she was of medium height, but her proportions gave the impression that she was taller. When she was gone, I turned to my appointment.
The course of the day followed as routine often dictated. This lesson and that was attended, during which the usual discussions, handing in of assignments and chatting up with friends came into play. My morning had been presented in a surprising way, and despite the routine that was imposed on my actions, my thoughts still kept on the girl I had met this morning. I pondered the question of how the infinite variables that were put in charge of making our eyes meet in a fashion that was too out of the ordinary. What a truly great responsibility! (At least it was to me.) It was always a fixation of mine that caused me to linger on such thoughts since I had always been sensitive to the bringers of good fortune. I thought that what I was thinking about was indeed good fortune.
Later on during the afternoon, I walked freely around the school, looking for friends who were game for a chat, or perhaps a philosophical discussion. I had momentarily forgotten about Weijann, since my teachers had managed to crowd my head with such a quantity of information requiring my attention that pushed the thought out of my mind. My head was warm, no doubt due to the overheating produced by the mental labor I had been obliged to perform. Now there was none of that, and I looked forward to the cool breeze that often swept the canteen at around 3 o’clock in the afternoon.
I sat alone for awhile. Some of my classmates came and joined me. All placed their bags and files around me and shuffled off to the stalls in search of food. Slowly each came back with a plate of something and settled down to eat.
Far away upon the field that spread out to my view, I noticed that the color of the grass was in a decidedly saturated hue today despite the blanket of dark heavy clouds that covered the sky. The scene was still bright and cheery, but in a way that compared itself with the sultry morning that had given way to this cool afternoon. I was glad of such a change since conversations were much happier conducted in cool weather. The wind blew as it usually did and I took it in with calm delight. The place where I sat faced north and if my geography teacher were to be believed, was the source of the wind I was now enjoying. Slowly the sky grew darker, and with it, the light in the canteen. Some who had been doing their homework were forced to stop, impaired from carrying on further by the deteriorating conditions.
Soon it would rain heavily, and the looming thunder excited several groups of students scattered around the canteen area. As waves of activity stirred among the students, I began to notice the forms that their shapes created, silhouetted by the light and moving like shadow puppets across a sky of cloth. Sitting where I was, partly recessed from the field, a group of students had gathered in front of me to look at what seemed to be the lightening that flashed up the sky. Between momentary bright flashes, their soft shadows cast themselves onto the ground before me. In the presence of the diffused light made by the clouds, these shadows merged into forms that moved with a life of their own. I was transfixed by this hypnotic movement, and my mind imagined itself as film, recording each intricate pattern as if it were a still photograph. The tiled floor further gave this play of light more bends and twists around its rugged corners, as if calling out attention to itself. I felt myself smiling appreciatively. I had never noticed the texture of the floor before. That something I walked on everyday without a moment’s thought could capture my attention now as it were was the only thing in the world gave me a sense once more that beauty could be found anywhere and perhaps in the most unexpected of places.
About this time, I had a sense that someone was staring at me. The activity I had chosen to engage myself did not altogether seem normal in the context of the situation. But I was always like that, somehow my attraction to events stemmed from the unconventional. Sometimes when I stepped back from myself, I thought it weird too that I should be staring at the floor and not at the great theatre in the sky that was captivating everybody. I looked upwards, suddenly conscious that what I was doing had met with somebody’s critical eyes.
I glanced unsteadily around my but saw no one looking at me. Then the head of a blocking figure moved, to uncover the girl who I had seen this morning. She was quite a distance from me, four or five rows of benches away. She was faintly amused, and nodded a greeting in my direction, Suddenly conscious of myself, I tried to appear as if no such thoughts of embarrassment has crossed my mind. Somehow, this pretence had not escaped her and she winked naughtily to signal her approval. Then, she stood up and started to walk in my direction. I could suddenly feel my self-consciousness fade away to nothing.
She had a funny way of doing that. Despite the fact that we were newly met, she somehow exuded a sense of familiarity that I could never put my finger on. If one could go so far to believe it, I probably knew her in some obscure previous life. Something like that could perhaps have accounted for our abrupt meeting and also this strange feeling I got.
WeiJann walked towards me in a time that seemed liked eternity. It wasn’t as if I dreaded her approach, rather I was trying to condense all my thoughts and feelings so far into a form that I could fit into the stereotypes of people I knew. This was what I usually found myself doing since I had a certain confidence that I had encountered most if not all of the characters that walked this earth. Perhaps my arrogance held up certain parts of my confidence. But I felt I was prepared to let it go at a moment’s notice since I realized that no matter what, I was merely mortal. To claim such super natural judgement would have been an absurd thing.
Anyhow, she finally reached me. Her eyes were twinkling steadily amidst the background of a low rumble in the sky. I patted an empty space on the bench beside me, motioning her to sit down. As she did, a scream of excited voices filled the canteen as rain abruptly poured from the heavens, drenching some that were in the front of the crowd. The sound was deafening since we were so near it. I was content to let it carry on awhile as I looked at Weijann again. She was preoccupied with the noise and was looking in open-mouthed amazement at the gaiety of the students who were playing with the rain. The movement that followed cast unseemly shadows on us who were in the background of the rain, along with the dappled light that flowed through, that danced incessantly about. This movement became charged with the energy of excitement and chaos. As I struggled to look at her in the fading light, her face, some parts illuminated and some in shadow, turned towards mine.
She smiled again, obviously feeling for the mood that was around us. I held my tongue in anticipation, for the suddenness of this meeting had not put me in a frame of mind that would allow some semblance of my initiation in this conversation.
To my relief she began first, " Hi, what were you looking at?"
I told her and motioned her to look down at the floor.
To be Continued