I was going to spend some time writing everything I know about raising teenagers ... but you know, I really don't know anything about raising teenagers.  Just ask my sons.  Actually, I don't have to ask them, I know I don't.  I can, however, remember when I was a  teenager and thinking how no one knew what I was going through - - and they were right!  When someone is in emotional pain other people are always trying to tell them that they know how that person feels.  No they don't!  No one ever knows exactly how another person feels. We all react different ways to different situations, and that includes teenagers.

On that same token, every teenager (person) is different.  Those of you with more two or more children of your own know what I'm talking about.  If you stood your children next to each other they may look very similar to each other, but each has their own differential personality and ways of dealing with different situations.  Most likely a younger sibling tried to imitate the older sibling in younger years, and as the younger sibling tried to do that, well, the older sibling would change their way of dealing with things so as to not be similar to the younger sibling.

Another thing I find fascinating about dealing with teenagers is that they don't always mature into the kind of adult they are going to be when you expect them to.  Sometimes it takes some a little longer to get to a recognizable human being.  Sometimes they seem angry and act like they hate themselves and the world.  You know what, they don't really.  They just want left alone to deal with their own problems (or perceived problems) and not have someone handle it for them.  As parents, we tend to forget that we want our children to grow up and that we need to let go some time, no matter how hard it is.

So, I guess the bottom line is -- if you just let them grow up, they will come to you if and when they need your advice.  If they don't ask for your help, chances are they really don't want or need it.  Just let them know you are there when they need you.
 

If you want to make any suggestions, make any comments, or just feel like writing, drop me a line at Rebel Mary