Parallel Structure

17a. When two or more items, intended to be given equal emphasis, are joined by a conjunction or conjunctions, and when the items are in the same grammatical form, parallel structure occurs.

She spoke clearly to the audience, and she also was listening with patience when they asked questions.

("spoke" and "was listening" are not parallel; and the same is true of "clearly" and "with patience," as well as "to the audience" and "when they asked questions.")

She spoke clearly to the audience and listened patiently to their questions.

("spoke" and "listened" are both verbs and are both in the past tense.)

She spoke clearly to the audience and listened patiently to their questions.

("clearly" and "patiently" are both adverbs.)

She spoke clearly to the audience and listened patiently to their questions.

("to the audience" and "to their questions" are both prepositional phrases.)

17b. The items in a parallel list all share in common some part of the sentence.

I like to swim, baseball, reading, and going to movies.

(not parallel)

I like to swim, play baseball, read, and go to movies.

(parallel-- see explanation after the next example.)

I like to swim, (to) play baseball, (to) read, and (to) go to movies.

(The word, "to" is unnecessary with the last three items, but it points out how the items are all parallel: they are all infinitive phrases. All of the items "share in common" the words, "I like to.")

With my lottery winnings, I bought a stereo, car, a television set, and computer.

(This is not parallel construction. The word, "a," must be repeated with each item to make the sentence parallel.)

With my lottery winnings, I bought a stereo, a car, a television set, and a computer.

(parallel)

His relationship was destroyed by greed, by selfishness, laziness, and complacency.

(not parallel) (The word, "by," was repeated twice and omitted twice.)

His relationship was destroyed by greed, by selfishness, by laziness, and by complacency.

(parallel) (See also the example below.)

His relationship was destroyed by greed, selfishness, laziness, and complacency.

(parallel) (In this example, the word, "by," is held in common by each element in the series and does not need to be repeated each time.)

17c. When using pairs of conjunctions (e.g., not only...but also; both...and; either...or; neither...nor) the two items compared must have the same grammatical construction in order to be parallel.

He wanted either wealth or to be powerful.

("wealth" is not parallel with "to be powerful.")

He wanted either wealth or power.

(parallel)

NOTE: Compare the words immediately after the "either" ("both," "neither," "not only") with the words immediately after the "or" ("and," "nor," "but also.")

He either wanted wealth or power.

("wanted wealth" is not parallel with "power.")

He either wanted wealth or wanted power.

(parallel)

I decided not only to edit the text but also that I should confront the author.

("to edit the text" is not parallel with "that I should confront.")

I decided not only to edit the text but also to confront the author.

(parallel)

He not only told me to edit the text but also to confront the author.

("told me to edit the text" is not parallel with "to confront the author.")

He not only told me to edit the text but also told me to confront the author.

(parallel but overly wordy)

17d. When using words like "first," "second," etc., be aware of parallel structure.

In order to be an effective technical editor, one must be able, first, to deal sensitively with others; secondly, be able to be consistent; and be able to, last, pay close attention to detail.

("to deal sensitively with others" is not parallel with "be able to be consistent" nor with "pay close attention to detail.")

In order to be an effective technical editor, one must be able, first, to deal sensitively with others; second, to be consistent; and, last, to pay close attention to detail.

("to deal sensitively with others" is parallel with "to be consistent" and with "to pay close attention to detail.")

NOTE: The words, "first," "second," and "last" are parallel, but the words, "first," "secondly," and "last" are not. Also note, in the last example, that the words, "one must be able" are held in common by all three elements.

17e. If the second half of a comparison is elliptical, make sure that the two halves are parallel.

That is a better written document than we editors usually encounter.

("That is a better written document" is not parallel with "we editors usually encounter.")

That is a better written document than those (documents) we editors usually encounter.

(parallel)

Dangling Modifiers

18a. Avoid dangling participial phrases.

Disheartened by three straight losses, losing a fourth game was easy.

(dangling participial phrase)

NOTE: "Disheartened by three straight losses" is a participial phrase and therefore acts as an adjective; however, in this sentence, the phrase is describing the word, "losing" which makes no sense. This is called a dangling participial phrase.

Disheartened by three straight losses, our team found losing a fourth game easy.

(correct)

NOTE: Now the participial phrase correctly modifies "our team," as we are the ones who are disheartened.

Because we had already lost three straight games, losing a fourth game was easy.

(correct)

Run over by a tractor, I had to buy my son a new bike.

(dangling)

I had to buy my son a new bike because his had been run over by a tractor.

(correct)

18b. Avoid dangling phrases containing infinitives or gerunds.

Ready to wash my car, the rain began to fall.

(dangling infinitive phrase)

When I was ready to wash my car, the rain began to fall.

(correct)

Prepare to begin surgery after being properly anesthetized.

(dangling infinitive phrase)

NOTE: The patient and not the doctor, hopefully, is the one being anesthetized.

Prepare to begin surgery after the patient is properly anesthetized.

(correct)

By shouting obscenities, the meeting was prematurely brought to a close.

(dangling gerund phrase)

By shouting obscenities, the intruders prematurely brought the meeting to a close.

(correct)

18c. Avoid dangling adverbial clauses.

While watching the baseball game, the Goodyear Blimp flew overhead.

(dangling adverbial clause)

While I was watching the baseball game, the Goodyear Blimp flew overhead.

(correct)

Redundancies

19a. Avoid words and phrases that are too wordy.

I would like to know whether or not you are coming to the meeting.

(The words or not serve no function, using up valuable space and reading time.)

In the following sentences, the italicized words or parts of words are redundant.)

At the present time, I plan to attend the meeting.

Let us begin preplanning the meeting.

We must be more proactive in our dealings with other departments.

We should not over exaggerate our past experiences.

I have never before heard that old adage.

Active and Passive Voice

20a. If the emphasis is on "who or what is doing the action," use the active voice.

Edward Teller once directed the Lab.

The avalanche crushed the cabin.

20b. If the emphasis is on "who or what is being affected by the action," use the passive voice.

The TCE-contaminated ground water was purified during the process.

NOTE: The sentence, "the process purified the TCE-contaminated ground water" would also be acceptable. Use the voice that puts the emphasis where desired.

20c. If either voice is acceptable, use the active because it is more direct.

Examples of surface rupture were seen by scientists along the Greenville Fault.

(too wordy because of the passive)

Scientists saw examples of surface rupture along the Greenville Fault.

(more direct, less wordy)

NOTE: The active construction, "scientists saw," uses two words; the passive construction, "were seen by scientists," uses four words to say the same thing.

20d. If possible, do not shift voices within a sentence.

When we reached Site 300, the monitoring well was seen.

(clumsy switch of voice)

When we reached Site 300, we saw the monitoring well.

(Both verbs are active.)

Subject-Verb Agreement

21a. If the subject is singular, the verb must be singular; if the subject is plural, the verb must be plural.

The absence of TCE-contaminated particles is [not "are"] a good sign.

(The subject, "absence," is singular, and so the verb must also be singular.)

Uncontaminated particles are [not "is"] a good sign.

(plural subject, plural verb)

The existence of twin boundaries in RBa2Cu3O7 (where "R" represents the rare-earth elements, except cerium, terbium, and praseodymium) provides [not "provide"] a unique opportunity to study the flux-pinning mechanism in layered high-temperature superconductors.

(The subject, "existence," is singular, and so the verb, "provides," must also be singular.)

21b. If the subject is a compound subject, the verb must be plural.

Laser-beam propagation, image fidelity, image-reconstruction quality, and beam-pointing accuracy are [not "is"] greatly effected by wave front phase.

Beam-pointing accuracy is greatly effected by wave front phase.

(See preceding example.)

NOTE: In scientific writing, sentences are often very complex, and the verb may be far from the subject.

The effectiveness of laser-beam propagation, image fidelity, image-reconstruction quality, and beam-pointing accuracy, to a large degree, is [not "are"] determined by wave front phase.

(The subject, "effectiveness," is singular.)

21c. The following indefinite pronouns are singular and require singular verbs.

anybody, anyone, any one, anything, each, either, every,

everybody, everyone, every one, everything, neither, nobody,

no one, nothing, one, somebody, someone, some one, something.

Everyone is to attend the meeting.

Every one of the employees is [not "are"] present.

Neither of the two faults (the Greenville and the Las Positas) has [not "have"] produced a quake in 1992.

21d. The following pronouns are plural and require plural verbs.

both, few, many, several, others.

Many are called, but few are chosen.

21e. A subject introduced by "both . . . and" requires a plural verb.

Both the Las Positas Fault and the Greenville Fault are presently quiet.

21f. A compound singular subject introduced by "neither . . . nor or either . . . or" requires a singular verb.

Neither a filter nor a filter-support screen is needed in the battery housing.

Either the standard sequential or a parallel split-flow operation separates the free radon progeny.

21g. A compound plural subject introduced by "neither . . . nor" or "either . . . or" requires a plural verb.

Neither filters nor filter-support screens are needed in the battery housings.

Either standard sequential or parallel split-flow operations separate the free radon progeny.

21h. A compound subject (introduced by "neither . . . nor" or "either . . . or") that is mixed (singular and plural) requires a singular verb if the singular subject is closer or a plural verb if the plural subject

is closer.

Neither a filter nor filter support screens are needed in the battery housings.

Neither filter support screens nor a filter is needed in the battery housings.

Articles

22a. Use "a" before words beginning with a consonant.

a quake a fault a layer a hunch

22b. Use "an" before words beginning with a vowel (except "u" when pronounced as a "y" and "o" when pronounced as a "w") and before a silent "h".

an apple an elephant an item an onion

an umpire a unicorn one-way street an hour

22c. Use "an" before the words for the letters "a, e, f, h, i, l, m, n, o, r, s, or x." (The words for these letters all begin with a vowel.)

Give me an f, an l, an x, and a y.

He will soon have an M.S. in physics.

22d. If an acronym or group of initials is pronounced as a word and not as separate letters, use "a" or "an" as required by the pronunciation.

We took an S.A.T. test.

We visited a SAC base.

22e. With chemical names, use "a" or "an" as required by pronunciation.

He conducted a H2O analysis.

(pronounced "a water analysis")

We found a FeO trace.

(pronounced "a ferrous oxide trace")

She was studying an YBa{2}Cu{3}O{7-x} crystal.

(pronounced "an yttrium")

Numbers

23a. Generally, spell out numbers one through ten, as well as common fractions; use figures for numbers above ten. (Other grammar books suggest spelling out numbers that are one or two words in length and using numerals for those that are three word or longer.)

This project is employing seven editors.

This project is employing 15 editors.

This project is employing approximately one-third of the editorial staff.

NOTE: In a series, if most of the numbers are below ten (but a few are above), spell out all the numbers. Conversely, if most of the numbers in a series are above ten (but a few are below) use figures for all the numbers.

The project is employing four editors, five compositors, and eleven [not "11"] artists.

The project is employing 11 editors, 12 compositors, 11 artists, and 1 [not "one"] division manager.

23b. Round, noncomplex numbers may be written in a combination of words and figures.

Over 200 million [not "200,000,000"] people now live in the United States.

Exactly 242,984,673 people now live in the United States.

(The number is too complex to spell out.)

23c. Always spell out a number that begins a sentence; if the number is too complex to spell out, rewrite the sentence so that the number is not at the beginning.

Forty-seven people attended the lecture.

23d. In scientific usage, physical quantities should be expressed in figures.

170 volts 6 [not "six"] square yards

1 [not "one"] pound

47deg.C

7 cubic centimeters

10 picas

23e. If an abbreviation or a symbol is used for a unit of measurement, express the number in figures.

4 hr

60 mph

7 g

18 ml

4"

17.2'

14deg.

45deg.40' N

23f. Spell out ordinals that are one or two words long.

We will soon proceed from the twentieth century to the twenty-first.

NOTE: An exception to the above rule occurs with addresses. For ordinals past tenth, use figures.

My last three addresses have been 417 22nd Street, 1050 Lomitas Avenue, and 607 Ninth Street.

23g. Days following months are expressed in cardinal figures; days preceding months are expressed in ordinal figures; days of the month without the month mentioned are expressed in ordinal words.

The meeting is on July 15.

The meeting is on the 15th of July.

The meeting is on the fifteenth.

23h. Military dates are expressed in cardinal numerals preceding the month. No comma is used between the month and the year.

The meeting is on 15 July 1992.

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