How many personalities fight for control of your will? I have at least two. One of them has
control of me at any given moment. Personality T is a egocentric but attractive spirit. It knows
exactly how to speak at any given moment. It is friendly, well liked and talented. It loves it
when others notice it. Personality O is a much less social being. It is concerned about others in a
peculiar way, not so much whether they are happy or sad, rich or poor but whether they are alive.
It sees those who live for this world as dead, and that a few like it have risen from that death and
will live happily even when the universe, and the dead spirits are terminated.
Personality T oozes with sated smiles. "Who can be happier than me? it thinks. Personality O has a different smile, a profound and gentle smile. It doesn't ask who is happier; it is happy
already, and does not need to happier than anyone to be satisfied. Weird? Perhaps. Let me explain
in the form of a story.
When I was born, my spirit was dead, instead, my ego (personality T) ruled me. It learned all
the stuff the world throws out at every human soul. I learned how to love life; I lived for myself.
When I decided to be born again (gasp--born again?), a new personality emerged, personality
O.
The birth of personality O could be spoken of this way:
Personality T was a spirit. It was a beautiful spirit, and it had an incredible robe. Made of the
finest silk, it was inlaid with gold and platinum, it was royal. Its two spirit-parents and spirit-
friends had given it to it when it was young. One thing was wrong with it. It was filthy. It had all
kinds of grime on it and STUNK! But, Personality T didn't know it stunk. It would look at the other
spirits' robes and they stunk. It was part of the deal. "This is the smell of a robe, it
thought. There's nothing wrong with that. Everybody's like that." It LOVED its robe, but deep
down it knew that something wasn't right about it.
One day personality T met a spirit that was not wearing a robe. That spirit was wearing a pair
of jeans, and a pure white cotton T-shirt. How peculiar, thought T. It had never seen this strange
style of clothing. It almost jeered at the strangely dressed spirit, but its wonder at how the other
spirit had gotten such strange clothing stopped it; it looked good in a bizarre way! The spirit
walked by, greeted T and was on its way. Strange.
As the other spirit passed, T noticed something. A wonderful aroma! Never had it perceived
something like this before. It was the most beautiful scent it had ever experienced; It was stronger
that the stench of T's robe. It was a light and pure scent, reminiscent of sparkling water, a bright
fire, pure mountain air, and the smell of the earth after rain all at once. Jealousy shot through it,
mixed with curiosity. The smell had come from the garments; it knew it.
T yelled to the other spirit, "STOP!" The other slowed down, looked back, smiled, and waited
for T to come closer. The two spirits walked together while T, still wary, started a conversation.
The strange spirit's name was =. = explained to T that the robes most spirits wore stunk. "My robe
what!" murmured T. The conversation went on for a while.
It turns out that the spirit world was under a curse. The stench in T's robe was that of death.
Decay and dust combined to form the unworldly reek. All of the spirits were no longer living
spirits but dead spirits. But, = said, One, a powerful Spirit, "not one of us," accepted to break the
curse, and suffered a horrible torture and death to remove it. That Spirit was dead for three days
and suffered a great deal, but it survived, and opened a way for all spirits to get rid of the stenches
in their robes, become living spirits again, and also to get new clothes, much more comfortable,
and CLEAN.
"But to get this you will have give up the robe you have. Also you will have to give up
yourself." T shuddered, but becoming a living spirit and wearing pure clothing sounded so good,
any price was not too much to ask. = continued speaking. "Spirits weren't made to wear robes like
that, at least not yet. A new age will come what spirits will wear them, but clean ones."
After a few hours of sometimes friendly, sometimes tense deliberation, = took T to the great Spirit's house, a magnificent
and clean place. Its walls were white, and light seemed to prefer to shine on it more than on the
rest of the spirit-world. Oh the aroma! It was stronger than ever; it flowed out of the windows, inviting the spirits to enter. Inside, unlike what T expected, there wasn't much gold or platinum; neither were there mysterious
power symbols on the doors. Everything was very pleasant. "Its aura is that of a spacious and
comfortable home, not a temple," thought T.
The great Spirit welcomed = and T, and said: "come here T" and embraced it. "Do you want
to be a living spirit?" "Yes," answered T. "Do you know the price?" "Y-yes," stuttered T.
"Follow me." said the great Spirit.
The great Spirit took T to a place where there was clean water.
There T left its robe, bathed and was immersed in the water.
To T's shock, when the water closed over it, T split apart. All of T felt a joyful new life born
in it. All of T also felt a chilling death coming on it. All of T was alive for the first time. All of T
was even deader than before, deader than death itself, for the first time. "The water was a water of
DEATH! The great spirit tricked me!" howled the dying T. "The water is a water of life! The great
Spirit was right!" whispered the living T. But then T remembered ='s words: "also you will have
to give up yourself."
Dying T could not leap out of the deadly water. Naked, it sunk to the bottom. The water
quickly became calm again. From where dying T had sunk rose the new spirit, also naked, shining new, living
T. "You shall no longer be T," said the great Spirit, " I name you O." The great Spirit rested a hand
on O, blessed O, and poured perfume on O. After this O dressed in a brand new pair of jeans
and a startlingly white T-shirt. It had never worn more comfortable garb.
"I will be with you always" said the great Spirit. "you will always be here, home, with me, no
matter where you are in the spirit-world." The great Spirit showed O the spirit world outside. It
was full of dead spirits, but not completely dead, just as T was before coming to the great Spirit.
"Go out and shine in the spirit world, and if a spirit wishes to become a living spirit you will go to
it, I will arrange a meeting without you always knowing it." O looked outside; then it looked into the great Spirit, and was at peace.
The story I wrote is strange to me. I hope you enjoyed it. I don't know if I wrote clearly enough; I suspect I didn't. I might have to edit it later.
After a lot of thought, I decided today to write only once on weekends. Rest is a necesary and appproved thing for me and for all. I will honor God through it.