An Unbreakable Bond
I'm sure you've heard stories about twins feeling pain when the other gets hurt. Or the mother who knows her child is in danger somehow. Me and my closest friend share a similar bond. We can sense when the other is in need,in pain or just very upset. I have several instances I can give you in which the bond has helped me.Here is a couple.
I was still in high school. I was over at my boyfriends apartment and I suddenly started having some VERY intense feelings of pain in my abdominal area. I was getting sick from the pain and couldn't help screaming and crying at the top of my lungs. I had never felt so much pain in my life ( even years later when I had my son). My friend was over 100 miles away in another city. She felt the pain the moment it started and began calling around in an attempt to find me. She called my mother and my mother gave her my boyfriends phone number. When someone answered the phone the first words out of her mouth was "What the hell was that???? What has happened to Michelle????" Even though she was 100 miles away she knew the exact moment the pain started and she also felt the pain. She was hysterical when she called because she was so scared for me. Once I began talking to her on the phone the pain began to subside and quickly faded away.
Another instance happened 7 years ago. My friend again started having abdominal pain. At first she just passed it off but when the pain got worse she mentioned something to her mother about it. All that night she continued to feel the pain. It was just waves of pain and she didn't know what to make of it.Exactly 24 hrs after the pain started I began going into labor. This of course was no suprise to her since she expeienced the birth the previous night. Hey what are friends for?

The Dream
Have you ever had the feeling you've done something before and you were re-enacting it?I have had that feeling numerous times. I dream of things to come sometimes (yet I do not always remember it).I have had many occasions that I have remembered as I awoke and later found them to come true. Sometimes it's the next week sometimes a few years later. I have even on occasion forced myself to have a future dream if I was unsure of an upcoming event or how things would go. The story I'm going to tell is about one such dream. A dream that I definately didn't want to see but one that I needed to. I must point out however this dream was unlike the others. In the others everything happened exactly as it did in real life in this dream only 1 important factor came true.
I was 17 years old and I had become pregnant unexpectedly. Very unexpectedly seeing as the doctor told me I could not have children. I wanted very much to keep the child but I was young and afraid. The father of the child was also afraid. Actually I should say terrified. He didn't know how to be a father, he didn't even have a job other than McDonald's. He didn't know how we would ever be able to care for the child, and perhaps most importantly he was not ready. He felt that the best thing for us and the child was to get an abortion. We shouldn't bring a child into the world if we can not care for it and be certain that the child would have a stable life. I still wanted to keep the child. It was my child and I may not have been able to have another. I understood everything he was saying and it made sense.I couldn't help remebering back to my childhood,when my mother and I was poor. Once we even had to live in a car for a short period of time. However I was still happy. I loved her and she loved me and that made up for alot. I felt I could love my child enough to make it easier. We may not be the richest family but we would have eachother. I kept trying to see the best choice I didn't have any job experience and Jason had very little. How would we make it? But what if this is my only chance? What if I cannot have another child? I was waging a war within myself. I was being torn apart from the inside. I finally decided that if I went through with it I would destroy our life as we knew it and the baby's and that I had to have the abortion. That very night I had the dream. Here is an exert, as it was when I wrote it down years ago.
As soon as I decided that I had a dream.My unborn son was in it. I can still remember it very clearly. I was walking down a long dark hall with the doctor that just performed the operation. He led me to a room and pointed to a small table. On the table was a hankerchief with a small lump under it. I knew it was my son. I walked over to see it,before lifting up the hankerchief I looked back at the doctor. He slowly shook his head no and pointed to a large table further down the room. On the table was a large bundle with a sheet over it. I walked over to it and looked underneath. A beautiful baby boy about 2 years old was under it. Suddenly he popped up and said "Hi Mom". I started crying. He told me it was OK and not to be sad and started to hug me. Then he hopped down off the table and took me by the hand. He led me out of the room and down the long dark hall. He said "I know that you love me and I understand if your not ready. It's OK if Daddy doesn't want me". With those words my heart melted. Just then we came upon a room. Jason was there watching T.V. and drinking a beer. Again he said "it's OK if Daddy doesn't want me right now. If I do not come now I will return to you. I will come. He gave me another hug and I held on to him for dear life.
I woke up with tears streaming down my face and my pillow soaked from tears. I could still feel him hugging me. I didn't want to get the abortion but it was reassuring to me somehow. I told Jason I would go through with it. The next day we tried to make the appointment. The doctor said I was to far along and that an operation may put me in jeopardy. I was not yet 3 months along I was in no jeopardy. I could have easily gone to another doctor. (I think my doctor knew I didn't want it so he wouldn't do it.) Jason finally gave up and said he would never put me in jeopardy and that we would have the baby. Ian looked exactly the same way he did in the dream when he was 2 years old. Blonde hair, blue eyes and always smiling. I think that we choose the life we will live before we live it. That we have a higher self that we can communicate with both before and after each life. I belive that the son in my dreams was Ian's higher being and that Ian is a very special person who has a purpose here. Only time will tell.
Although the dream doesn't seem very long it felt long. All throught it he was reassuring me and letting me know he would come again. If it weren't for his appearance in the dream and how exactly he matched the dream figure I would have passed it off as my subconcious telling me what I needed to hear. However when things such as that happen we envision someone in the dream and place them there. How we remember the vision keeps changing with our perceptions. My perception never changed and I awaited the day he had grown to 2 years old so I could see for myself if the dream was true. In the middle of his 2nd year my son gave my a very loving,caring and wise look. It seemed as if I could see into his soul for a brief moment. It was that exact moment that he was exactly like the child in the dream. I know in my heart the dream was "real" because I could never have forseen how my child would look.

UPDATE
In case your wondering how everything went once we decided to keep the baby here's a little info. Once Jason thought that he might have to care for the child he joined the military. He had to enlist at the mere chance of having a child so we would have medical insurance when I was pregnant. We were in the military for 2 and a half years. It was just long enough to give us a good start and get Ian through his most vulnerable years. We lived in the military for almost 3 years until we were able to move back to Arizona. After about a year in Arizona we got tired of the rat race and decided to move to the country. Big mistake. We were stuck for years. We grew apart there and lived like room mates. When we finally moved back to Arizona I decided to move back seperately. It was what I exactly needed to move forward emotionally and spiritually. Everyone involved is very happpy now. Me and Jason are still close friends and the kids still has both mom and dad very close.