June 17, 2001

Philippians 4:2-9

How to Stay Positive in the Midst of Troubles – A Message for Husbands, Fathers, and Everyone Else

1. Introduction

1. Illustration – Leonard Sweet, in SoulSalsa, writes, One tribe of native Americans had a unique way for training young braves. On the night of a boy’s thirteenth birthday, he was placed in a dense forest to spend the entire night alone. Until then he had never been away from the security of his family and tribe. But on this night he was blindfolded and taken miles away. When he took off the blindfold, he was in the middle of thick woods. By himself. All night long. Every time a twig snapped, he probably visualized a wild animal ready to pounce. Every time an animal howled, he imagined a wolf leaping out of the darkness. Every time the wind blew, he wondered what more sinister sound it masked. No doubt it was a terrifying night for many. After what seemed like an eternity, the first rays of sunlight entered the interior of the forest. Looking around, the boy saw flowers, trees, and the outline of the path. Then, to his utter astonishment, he beheld the figure of a man standing just a few feet away, armed with a bow and arrow. It was the boy’s father. He had been there all night long. Can you think of a better way for a child to learn how God allows us to face the tests of life? God is always present with us. God’s presence is unseen, but it is more real than life itself.
2. Context – Paul had every reason in the world to be discouraged. His brothers in the Jewish faith wanted him dead. He spent a fair amount of his life in the custody of the Roman government. He had gone through every hardship imaginable. But he still maintained his focus. He knew his heavenly Father was always with Him, even in the darkest times. And that experiential knowledge allowed him to write the passage we’re looking at today.

1. Scripture Passage

1. Philippians 4:2-9 – I plead with Euodia and I plead with Syntyche to agree with each other in the Lord. ³ Yes, and I ask you, loyal yokefellow, help these women who have contended at my side in the cause of the gospel, along with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life. ⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! ⁵ Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. ⁶ Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. ⁷ And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. ⁸ Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. ⁹ Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
2. I realize that this is not one of the usual Father’s Day passages that is preached on. But God has made it clear to me that all of us, as husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, and children, need to hear this message today.

1. Three Points of Need

1. Paul begins by addressing two women involved in a dispute that is serious enough to involve several of the leaders of the church. One commentator indicates that the dispute apparently centered on the personal ambitions he condemned in chapter two. It isn’t clear whether those ambitions had engulfed one or both of the women, but it is clear that Paul was seeking reconciliation between the two. In other words, Paul wanted them to abandon their personal desires and ambitions and be reconciled. He wanted the sin issues involved to be dealt with. He wanted there to be peace in the church. That was only possible if those sin issues were dealt with, personal ambitions dropped, and reconciliation had taken place. The first "R" to connect with this passage is reconciliation.
2. The second "R" Paul wrote about is rejoicing. Rejoicing is only possible if reconciliation has taken place. He says that rejoicing brings gentleness if we recognize that, just as the Indian father was with his son, God is with us. Then we are free not to worry, but to present all of our needs to God with a spirit of thanksgiving. Not thanksgiving that specific things have happened to us, but thanksgiving that God has allowed those things into our lives so that we will come to Him in prayer and trust Him to meet our needs. Not wants or desires, but needs. Remember that when we pray from a pure heart, the more we pray the closer we come to God and the more we come to see things from God’s perspective. Reconciliation brings rejoicing, which brings gentleness, which brings thanksgiving, which brings peace. Peace that doesn’t make sense in the midst of our circumstances. Peace that God provides. Reconciliation and rejoicing are the first two "R"s in this passage.
3. The third "R" is renewal. In verses eight and nine, Paul is giving us practical advice on how to experience a renewal of our minds. He says that thinking right and doing right go hand in hand. He says to think about what’s true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. It seems to me that in many respects he is describing God. God is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. Any of these characteristics separated from the other ones can be distorted into something that is evil. For instance, if we husbands and fathers decide to focus on whatever is lovely, we could find ourselves focusing on ladies other than our wives, which is sin. Focusing our thinking on the One God who fits these characteristics will renew our minds, especially when we combine that with doing what is right. Paul says that we should do whatever exemplifies Christ in our daily lives. If that means following a Christ-like role model such as Paul, or in our day Billy Graham, then we should do it. The most important issue is that we allow right thinking and doing to transform our thought patterns – to renew our minds. Allowing our minds to be renewed will free the God of peace to be with us always.
4. Reconciliation, rejoicing, and renewal. The three R’s that allow us to stay positive even in the middle of tough times. It’s easy for us to take our minds off of these things and merely focus on the negative aspects of our lives. Reconciliation, rejoicing and renewal allow us to deal with those negative aspects in such a way that Christ is honored and God is glorified. Sin is the only thing that can stand in the way of the three R’s. Sin is the only thing that can stand in the way of God using us. Sin is the only thing that can stand in the way of Christ being honored and God glorified. We have a choice. We stand at a crossroads today. We can either deal with the sin and enact reconciliation, rejoicing and renewal in our lives by the power of the Holy Spirit. Or we can live a fractured life.
5. Husbands and fathers, we must take spiritual leadership of our households in enacting the three R’s in the life of our families. We can be set free from being tangled up and bogged down in sin and shame. We can be set free from unhealthy patterns of relating within our families and friendships. We can be set free from bondage to sin. We simply have to take spiritual authority over our houses, and begin the process of reconciliation, rejoicing and renewal. The blood of Jesus is more than able to set us free if we walk in the path that God calls us to. Are we willing to set aside our macho inclinations, our competitiveness, our unwillingness to be the spiritual leaders of our homes? Are we willing to begin to be reconciled to God, to the members of our families, and to each other? Satan has been winning this battle for far too long. It’s time for us as men of God to take charge of our homes spiritually. It’s time for us as men of God to love our wives as Christ loved the church, sacrificially, as we love ourselves. It’s time for us as men of God to love our children and nurture them in their faith. It’s time for us as men of God to forsake sin so that we can be reconciled with our brothers and sisters in Christ. It’s time for us as men of God to create a safe and loving atmosphere in our homes and in our church. The ladies can’t do that because they haven’t been given the spiritual authority to do so by God. We men have to do that. As Jack Hayford puts it, we are to be the agents of redemption in our church and in our homes that God created us to be. Are we willing to do it? Will we take the steps necessary to do it?

1. Conclusion

1. Men, the time for us to be spiritual wimps is past. Ladies, the time for the men to assume their God-called place as spiritual, nurturing leaders in the home and in the church is now. That means you’re going to have to allow us to learn as we go. We’re going to make mistakes. We’ll probably even flake out from time to time. Ladies, keep us accountable. Men, we must keep each other accountable. As men of God we must answer the call. We must begin the process of reconciliation, rejoicing and renewal if we are going to be the men of God He has called us to be. We must do it if our families and our church is going to experience healing. So I have to ask each one of us men if we will do it? The spiritual survival of our families and our church depend on it.
2. Men, if you are willing to commit to the call that God has placed on us, make a stand and come forward and stand right now. Don’t wimp out. Come forward and stand right now. Ladies, after the men have come forward, gather around us and spend some time praying for us. We got ourselves into this together, let’s get ourselves out of it together by the power of the Holy Spirit. Come forward now.
3. Let’s pray.