I. Introduction

A. Illustration - Melvin Newland writes, There is an old proverb that says, "When there is righteousness in the heart, there is beauty of character. When there is beauty of character, there is honor in the home. When there is honor in the home, there is order in society. And when there is order in society, there is peace in the world" (as cited on SermonCentral.com). When there is honor in God’s house, our world is transformed. Paul wrote about this in Romans 12:10.

B. Romans 12:10b from the NIV – Honor one another above yourselves.

C. Let’s start out by figuring out what honor really means.

II. Preferring One Another

A. My dictionary defines the verb honor as “to esteem… to show respect for… to confer distinction upon.” My exegetical guide to the New Testament about the use of time’ (honor) in this verse: “The result of true affection is that no one seeks his own honor or position, and everyone is willing to give honor to others.” (Rogers, Cleon L Jr., and Cleon L. Rogers III, The New Exegetical and Linguistic Key to the Greek New Testament. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan Publishing House, 1998, pg. 339.) This word time’ can also be translated as precious or price, so the truth that Paul is expressing is the great value each one of us has and therefore we’ve got to recognize that great value in each other. The there’s the part of the verse that says “above yourselves.” My exegetical guide says about the word proe’youmenoi “It either means to try to outdo one another in showing respect or to consider better, to esteem more highly.” Marvin Vincent, in Word Studies in the New Testament, writes, “It means to go before as a guide… Hence, leading the way in showing the honor that is due.” These words Paul is using are truly powerful in showing us what God is calling us to.

B. When I officiate at weddings, I use that phrase “love, honor and cherish,” and I’m sure they were probably used in your vows when you were married. But, you know, thinking back to my own wedding I’m thoroughly convinced that I had no clue at the time about what the word honor really meant. And to be honest, I’m still not sure what it’s all about when it comes to living it out in everyday life. I know that too much of the time I don’t do that great of a job of honoring my wife at home. We all struggle at times with honoring one another above ourselves in our homes. We struggle with it at work and at school and at church. We all want to do better in outdoing each other in showing respect and esteem and honor. But what does that look like?

C. Romans 12:10b in the New Living says …take delight in honoring each other. Our attitude has a tremendous amount to say about whether or not we’re able to honor one another about ourselves. If we approach honoring one another with an attitude of delight and joy, then we’ve taken a huge first step. If we’re going to be able to do that, it’s going to take humility – not falsely acting like we’re humble – but truly realizing who we are and who God is and acting on that knowledge. Philippians 2:3-11 in the New Living says, Don’t be selfish; don’t live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself. 4 Don’t think only about your own affairs, but be interested in others, too, and what they are doing. 5 Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had. 6 Though he was God, he did not demand and cling to his rights as God. 7 He made himself nothing, he took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form. 8 And in human form he obediently humbled himself even further by dying a criminal’s death on a cross. 9 Because of this, God raised him up to the heights of heaven and gave him a name that is above every other name, 10 so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. Jesus is our perfect example of humility. Jesus is our perfect example of how to honor one another above ourselves.

D. Now I want you to notice something about the life of Jesus. He didn’t go around saying, “Woe is me! I’m worthless!” That’s not humility, that’s a pity party. His humility required meekness – not weakness – but controlled strength. And He found the power of that strength through the Holy Spirit. We can try all we want to in our own strength to be humble and to honor one another above ourselves, but we’ll fail. Our selfishness and spirit of competition will always get in the way. Paul recognized this, which is why he prefaced his admonition about honoring one another with verses one and two. And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice – the kind he will accept. When you think of what he has done for you, is this too much to ask? 2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is. Renewed minds are humble. Renewed minds love others with God’s sacrificial love. Renewed minds love others in true godly devotion as family. Renewed minds honor others above themselves.

E. That’s really what it’s all about. Transformation is what God is in the business of doing. And a part of that transformation is teaching us to honor one another above ourselves. We know that God wants us to honor each other, and we want to do it. But how do we do it? First, pray for one another diligently. Pray God’s blessings on them, and pray for an outpouring of His Spirit over them. We talked a bit last week about how, when we pray for others this way, God will change our hearts and our minds and our attitudes towards them. We also honor one another by praying for their needs to be met. In doing that, we’re praying for God’s blessing on them. And we honor one another by praying together for God’s blessing and guidance and provision for each other and for our church. When we pray together, God draws us closer to each other, and we begin to become one in mind and in spirit about God’s desires for us and for our church. We begin to care more about each other, and so we honor one another more. Prayer is a key to honoring one another above ourselves.

F. Second, speak only words of honor about one another. Psalm 19:14 says, May the words of my mouth and the thoughts of my heart be pleasing to you, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer. God isn’t pleased with words or thoughts of criticism, gossip, pride – the list could go on. As we talked about last week, we live in a culture that trains us to be critics and gossips and teaches us to be very verbal in our criticism. But folks, we can rise above that by the power of the Holy Spirit. As we spend time thinking about the tremendously huge price Christ paid for all of us and how precious we all are to Him, we begin to realize that speaking words of honor about and to one another is the least we can do to honor His sacrifice for us. As we begin speaking words of honor our thoughts will begin to follow and our minds will begin to be renewed. The Holy Spirit can and will help us speak words of honor if we call on Him for help and if we obey Him in doing it. Speaking only words of honor about and to one another is a key to honoring one another above ourselves.

G. Third, do those things that bring honor to others. This may be as hard for us as speaking honoring things. James 2:26 says, Just as the body is dead without a spirit, so also faith is dead without good deeds. It’s not enough for us to just pray honoring things and say honoring things, we’ve got to do honoring things to and for one another. And in our busy world that’s a lot easier to talk about than it is to do. That’s one of the main reasons Satan tempts us to pack our schedules with everything we can cram into them – so that we don’t have time to honor God or to honor one another. Our world calls that living life to the fullest, or living life on the edge. God calls it foolishness and sin. Remember that Satan came to steal and to kill and to destroy, and he will bring things into our lives and whisper lies into our minds to an attempt to get us to forget about honoring one another. One way we honor one another above ourselves in what we do is doing something kind for someone each and every day. We talked a bit about that last week. When we do something kind for someone else, we’re demonstrating to them that we believe them to be precious, and in doing so we’re honoring them. This is something we can do not only as individuals but as a church by serving our communities. Some churches hand out bottles of cold water on hot days. Some, like ours, are involved in schools. Some offer free babysitting to allow parents to shop for holidays. There are lots of options, and as a church we’ve got to explore them and determine what we can do and what God wants us to do. But as individuals we can honor one another above ourselves in our daily lives by doing something kind for others each day.

H. Illustration – Stuart Sacks wrote, While I was serving in Paraguay, a Maka Indian named Rafael came to sit on my porch. I was eating and went out to see what he wanted. He responded, "Ham, henek met." Again I asked what I could do for him, but the answer was the same. I understood what he was saying but not its significance: "I don't want anything; I have just come near." I later shared the incident with a local veteran missionary. He explained that it was Rafael's way of honoring me. He really didn't want anything; he just wanted to sit on my porch. He found satisfaction and pleasure just being near me (as cited on PreachingToday.com).

III. Conclusion

A. We’ve been talking the last few weeks about praying for God’s blessing and an outpouring of His Spirit on others. Right now, break up into groups of three or four and spend a few moments praying for each other. I know some of you may be a bit uncomfortable with this, but it is a necessary part of being the Body of Christ. If you don’t feel comfortable praying for specific things, just pray for God’s abundant blessings and an outpouring of His Spirit on each person in your group. Let’s begin this practice of honoring one another above ourselves by praying for each other.

B. Let’s pray together.