NerfNews - Thursday, August 9, 2001

Nerf Games Coming in August!

Two weeks from today, in the willowy hours of Thursday eve, (6:00 pm on August 23rd, that is), Nerf games will return to the seventh floor.  As always, see John Marshall or Jon Fleming for more info.

Foam Flying Madness on the Seventh Floor

On the 28th of June last, whistling mayhem inundated the seventh floor.  The not-so-dirty dozen participants enjoyed over two hours of frantic Nerf combat, espionage and subterfuge.  Although it took some time to sort out the maps for the Capture the Flag game, it was tremendous fun for all (with the possible exception of one "camper" who wondered where all the action was.)
 
 
Bad Boys, Bad Boys, whatcha gonna do?
We're here for the Steven Seagal convention.

La Femme Nerfkita

The next time you join us for Nerf Games, you should be sure to watch your back.  Otherwise, a certain miniskirted vixen of nerf might "bust a nerf cap in your skinny a$$".  Said vixen has in her possession a nerf weapon of intimidating proportions.  Be sure to visit the NerfNews archives to discover the identity and nature of this new nerf threat.
 
On your knees, you pathetic grovelling toady!

Nerf Super Villain

Fear This!

Close up of the Nerf Popper of Death

The Nerf Weapon Locker

In the last NerfNews, we implied that we control a Nerf Arsenal that poses a national security risk to Canada.  In this issue of NerfNews, we examine the extent to which Canadians should be worried.
 
Mama Mia, thatsa lotta guns!
A cause for concern.

The Ballblaster

Bow Down!
You'll need strong arms to wield this sucker.

The Ballblaster is an excellent siege weapon, since it is the only nerf gun (that we currently use) that fires nerf balls.  Nerf balls are the only ammo that can riccochet, and still register a hit.  All other nerf darts and arrows must be a direct bodily hit to count.  For this reason, the Ballblaster can be used with great efficacy to flush out "campers" (players who hide in darkness waiting to "snipe" unsuspecting passers-by) from cubes and closets.  This gun uses battery operated motors to eject Nerf balls using wheels.

Number:   2
Mods:   None
Fire:   Semi-automatic
Capacity: 15 balls
 

The Wildfire

I am the Alpha and the Omega!
A toy your mother never warned you about

New to our arsenal is the fearful Wildfire.  This "Gatling Gun" fires 20 nerf micro darts in under three seconds.  It is very useful for assaulting a strong hold, due to the prodigious cover fire capability.  This gun uses a pneumatic air bladder for its fire power.

Number:  3
Mods:  None
Fire:  Automatic
Capacity: 20 micro darts
 

The PowerClip

Ooh, Shiny!

Power Clip from the Right Hand Side

Pump up the air!

...and the left hand side

The PowerClip is the staple Nerf Gun used in the GoAhead Gaming Arena.  Excellent range, accuracy and fast rate of fire make this a very versatile gun.  The major drawback to this weapon is the difficulty of reloading the magazine once it is spent.  This gun uses a pneumatic air bladder for its fire power.

Number:  20
Mods:  Removable magazines, bored out barrels
Fire:  Automatic
Capacity: 10 micro darts per magazine
 

The SuperMaxx 3000

Headshot!
Kids, don't try this at home

The SuperMaxx 3000 is the "shotgun" of our arsenal, and the main reason we make eye protection mandatory.  Off the shelf, this weapon is hardly a threat.  After the proper modifications, it has astounding range.  An important thing to remember when using the SuperMaxx in battle is that it shoots high.  This gun uses a pneumatic air chamber for its fire power.

Number:  3
Mods:  Bored out barrels
Fire:  Pump-Action
Capacity: 8 mega darts or 8 micro darts
 

The Vortex Tornado

Not to be taken lightly
Marvin the Martian uses this weapon exclusively

The Tornado is unique in that it fires spinning rings.  This gun is the most accurate and quiet of all of our Nerf guns.  The weapon of choice for snipers.  This gun uses a spring loaded firing mechanism.

Number:  3
Mods:  Protective housing removed for loading efficiency
Fire:  Single Shot
Capacity: 1 ring
 

The Hidden Shot

Ready for pocket insertion.

Hidden Shot in Stealth Configuration

Well, Mr. Bond, it seems I have you at an advantage.

Hidden Shot Open for Business

This little derringer is a last line of defense.  Very useful to carry for those situations when you excitedly empty your Powerclip at your enemy's reflection in a window.

Number:  2
Mods:  None
Fire:  Single shot
Capacity: 3 micro darts

NerfNews Now Archived

NerfNews Archives can now be found at http://geocities.datacellar.net/jonfleming/nerf
Added Bonus:  There are photos available in the archive!
 

Until next time,
The NerfNews Crew.
 

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