A. Meeting or marrying right after a significant loss (rebound).

B. One or both parties wants to distance themselves from their F.O.O. Marriage should not be a way to escape.

C. Problems when family's backgrounds are significantly different, such as in religion, economic status, or religion. Different race often works out okay.

D. Couple has incompatible sibling constellations, which means that they did not get along (in a major, serious way) with their brothers and sisters. From a systems perspective, we will probably take our relation skills for close relationships with us into marriage.

E. Couples reside extremely close or too far from F.O.O. This could be either enmeshment or disengaged.

F. Couple is dependent on F.O.O. either financially, physically, or emotionally.

G. If married before 20 or after 30, then be careful.

H. If married after only 3 months or engaged for more than 3 years, then be careful.

I. Wedding occurs without family or friends being present.

J. Wife becomes pregnant before marriage or during first year of marriage. This situation shows a very high divorce rate.

K. Either spouse has a poor relationship with siblings or parents. The style of relating gets passed on, and that is how we relate to each other.

L. Either spouse had unhappy childhood or adolesence.

M. Marital patterns in either extended family was unstable. In systems theory, these patterns get passed on.

A. The members were committed.

B. They appreciated each other.

C. They spent time together.

D. They had open and honest communications.

E. They had a high degree of religious or spiritual orientation.

F. They were adaptable.

G. The couples had learned to encourage each other.

H. They had roles that were clearly defined. There were not any unspoken roles.