A. Object Relations - internalized images of the self and others based on early parent-child interaction which determine a person's mode of relationship to other people. Borderline personality disorder is very difficult to handle. A borderline person abuses systems, breaches personal boundaries, and does things like hugging when it is not appropriate. This personality is very abusive to families and others. It occurs mostly in women, and these women suck people in and then mess them up. People with this disorder can be very intelligent.

B. Projective Identification - a defense mechanism that operates unconsciously, whereby unwanted aspects of the self are attributed to another person and that person is induced to behave in accordance with these projected attitudes and feelings. Projection is also when we think one person looks like another and then expect them to act the same.

C. Resistance - any conscious or unconscious behavior that blocks or impedes therapy. This can be in the form of not attending sessions or even by claiming that they are cured.

D. Selfobject - Heinz Kohut's term for a person related to not as a separate individual, but as an extension of the self. People can learn about themselves from selfobjects who are reflecting aspects of self back.

E. Separation/Individuation - process whereby an infant begins, at about two months, to draw apart from the physical symbiotic bond with the mother and develops autonomous functioning. This is repeated in adolescence as emotional separation. Two year old kids and adolescents are setting boundaries for themselves and separating from parents.

F. Transference - psychoanalytic term for distorted emotional reactions to present relationships based on unresolved, early family relations. This is similar to projection. It is where one person projects something onto someone else.

A. Alienation (from experience) - this occurs when family members restrict their awareness of feelings. This leads to restrictions of family communication and corresponding separation/individuation difficulties. This is separating from one's emotions and/or expressions, and it will negatively affect an individual's development and the positive effects of counseling.

B. Conjoint Family Drawing- an experiential technique in which family members are asked to draw their ideas on how the family organized. This technique can be very good. Kids are good at showing a lot of information. Each person should discuss their drawing, and everyone needs to have a chance to talk. Adults wear more masks because they do not want to be self-critical. People can even hide things from themselves. Differentiation and Individuation are very similar, and both lead to where a person can finally be satisfied with themselves.