The bad: Judge #1 said "I would have liked to see more discussion at the end, but otherwise, it was fine." Judge #2 said some of the characters acted wildly out of character. They also said it was either too long or too short, but didn’t specify which one. They said "Nope, just the right amount – it was just awkward," when asked about the dialogue. They finally said "It has merit, but . . . the author needs a lot more detail work and loosen up with the dialogue."
The summary: Judge #1 has given us a glimpse of what the story holds with their comment of "I like the idea of Rictor serving as the catalyst for the dissolution of the team."
Broken
by Alicia McKenzie
Total score: 94
The good: The judges really liked this one. Neither of them gave a
whole lot of comments, but they’re positive. Judge #1 said it was "very
smoothly and elegantly written, with subtle touches and attention to detail."
This judge called it "a disturbing story to read - fear, nervousness -
I actually found myself wincing at times." When asked if they enjoyed it,
they said "Yes - in a sick sort of way <g>." They concluded by saying
"This is a truly frightening look at Apocalypse and what could happen if
Nathan fails in his task. It is also a fascinating look into the man known
as Cable. Alicia takes one right into the heart of Nathan Dayspring, and
then breaks that heart. This is a powerful piece that draws you in and
holds you there. The description is so clear that, I found myself flinching
at times while reading this story. The imagery is as powerful as it is
disturbing." Judge #2 had very few comments, which mainly consisted of
"I might have over rated it but I'd have to say it was the best fan fic
I can remember reading. As much as it was long it filled the space very
well by means of not having to drag things, also things weren't slapped
on like with some stories I read, everything seemed to have an understandable
reason."
The bad: Aha! Judge #2 only gave this story 7.8 points out of 10 for dialogue! Hey, what are you looking at me like that for? I couldn’t leave this space totally blank!
The summary: Judge #1 says "This is a truly frightening look at Apocalypse and what could happen if Nathan fails in his task."
Truth in the Tequila
by Alicia McKenzie
Total score: 96
The good: Judge #1 said this story made "Nice use of flashbacks." "Very
good look at the Pack and at Cable." They concluded by saying "An excellent
look, not only at Cable's early days with the Pack, but also at his role
as Askani'son. It is also an excellent look at Cable's relationships with
several key people in his life. Reading this, I couldn't help but wonder
if this tension with Hammer didn't make it that much easier for him to
pull the trigger years later. I was also moved by his friendship with GW
- it served as a strong contrast to their llater conflict, and served as
a nice way to explain the complexity of their later relationship." Judge
#2 said "She really did knock this one out of the ballpark – one of the
first looks at both Cable’s intense anger as well as intense grief – and
gave some very nice back-story as well, though not canonical, important
to the story and probably fairly accurate, given what was known at the
time. All-around great read."
The bad: Judge #2 said the story made sense, "Except it was slightly too complicated for the story she was telling."
The summary: See Judge #1’s closing words.
Colors of Belief
by Karen Galarneault
Total score: 66
The good: Judge #1 said the story is original and the ending was not
predictable. The dialogue was interesting "for the most part." They finally
said "This is an interesting concept, with a great deal of potential. I
liked the examination of Dani Moonstar's her time with the MLF, and her
perceptions of the team." Judge #2 said "There was the right amount" of
dialogue.
The bad: Judge #1 said "It left too many questions…objectives not fully defined." They also said "Reignfire's objectives in this mission are somewhat unclear. Why are the MLF in Bosnia? What does he hope to gain out of this? Also there are several typos and grammatical errors that detract from the story's appeal." Judge #2 said "I couldn’t exactly decipher the plot…I fail to see why the MLF would find the Bosnian/Serb talks particularly forwarding for their cause . . . not to mention not much research done." They later said "I’m fairly confused, actually . . ."
The summary: A look at Dani Moonstar during her time in the MLF.
Live for Me
by Darkchilde and Binkeee
Total score: 72.5
The good: Judge #1 said "the river being representative of Sam's grief"
was a good metaphor/simile. They concluded by saying "Darkchilde and Binkeee
successfully take us into Sam's grief and internal conflict. I thought
that the river served as a very effective representation of Sam's own grief
and the danger of his losing himself within that grief." Judge #2 said
"I think Sam was fine," when asked about the dialogue.
The bad: Judge #2 said the plot was "not really" well thought-out. They also said "It was a rendition of every grave story I’ve ever read, really . . ." They finally said "It was . . . much like all the others of this type of story I’ve read, and not that great – lots of ‘it’s’ where ‘its’ was correct, Heavenly was confusing because of the caps, simple repetition would have given it weight . . ."
The summary: From what I can gather from the reviews, this is about Sam after losing someone dear to him.
Death in the Family
by Denise Keppel
Total score: 90
The good: Judge #1 said "It made me cry *sniff*" They ended with "This
is a superb examination of exactly what it means for Sam to be an External.
The descriptions of his family, their closeness, and their traditions effectively
demonstrated the personal toll of his immortality. His remembrances of
his past with his sister were particularly evocative, as was his comparison
of himself to his nephew 'Little' Sam. This is a very poignant piece that
captures the essence of Sam Guthrie." Judge #2 said "It’s been done before,
but probably never this well . . . she did an excellent enough job that
I had to go run to #plottingchat and spam the URL from the FanFiction Archive
so they’d go read it . . . didn’t tell them why."
The bad: Judge #2 said "Yes [the ending was predictable], but it was supposed to be." Other than that, no one was willing to say much bad about this story.
The summary: Sam returns home many years in the future when Paige is very old and on her deathbed.
The bad: Haha! Judge #2 only gave this one 14 out of 15 possible points for grammar! What? You think they’re going to give a story with that high of a score any negative comments?
The summary: Domino confronts Cable after his tryst with a very unlikely
lover. Sequel to "By the Lake" by Alicia McKenzie and "In the Bushes" by
Kaylee.
