... Computers and English ...

A computer was something on television from a science fiction show of note. A window was something you hated to clean and ram was the cousin of a goat. Meg was the name of my girlfriend and gig was a job for the nights. Now they all mean different things and that really mega bytes. An application was for employment. A program was a television show. A cursor used profanity. A keyboard was a piano. Memory was something that you lost with age. A CD was a bank account. And if you had a 3" floppy you hoped nobody found out. Compress was something you did to the garbage; not something you did to a file. And if you unzipped anything in public you'd be in jail for awhile Log on was adding wood to the fire. Hard drive was a long trip on the road. A mouse pad was where a mouse lived. And a backup happened in your commode. Cut you did with a pocket knife; paste you did with glue. A web site was a spider's home and a virus was the flu. And the memory is something in your head. I hear nobody's been killed in a computer crash. But when it happens they wish they were dead.