... Getting Old ... ... Recommend this page to a friend.
- Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start bragging about it.
- Don't let anyone tell you you're getting old. Squash their toes with your rocker.
- The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
- Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me. I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
- Maturity means being emotionally and mentally healthy. It is that time when you know when to say yes and when to say no, and when to say whoopee.
- How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
- When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of Algebra.
- You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
- I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
- The golden years are really just metallic years, gold in the tooth, silver in your hair, and lead in the rear.
- Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of 80 and gradually approach 18.
- One of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice change from being young. One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
- Age seldom arrives smoothly or quickly. It is more often a succession of jerks.
- Yeah, being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
- Old age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled, and blind they don't recognize you.
- If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST
- First you forget names, then you forget faces. Then you forget to pull your zipper up, then you forget to pull your zipper down.
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