... Strange Exam Answers ...

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Q: Explain one of the ways in which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.

Q: Give the meaning of the term "Ceasarean section".
A: The ceasarean section is a district in Rome.

Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
A: Keep it in the cow.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: Name a disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.

Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.

Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.

Q: What does "varicose" mean?
A: Nearby.

Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If you are buying a house, they will insist you are well endowed.

Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.

Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded by sky.

Q: What is a seizure?
A: A Roman emperor.

Q: What is a turbine?
A: Something an Arab or Sikh wears on his head.

Q: What is artificial insemination?
A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.

Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.

Q: What is the most common form of birth control?
A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

Q; Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
A: Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like umbrellas.